Everyone was surprised by this revelation. It was difficult for them to comprehend the idea of a future self traveling back in time to change their past actions. But Alexander explained that the Throne of Heroes contains not only ancient heroic spirits but also those from the future, who could potentially be summoned by people in the present, albeit with great difficulty.
Emiya Kiritsugu couldn't understand why his future son would want to deny his own existence as a hero. He was puzzled by what could have led his son to such a decision.
"Because... I am just a fake hero." Archer's voice remained steady, devoid of emotion, as if recounting someone else's story. "After the Fifth Holy Grail War, I trained relentlessly, aspiring to become a 'champion of justice.' But soon, I faced a harsh reality—my strength alone was insufficient to save humanity.
Ten years later, a power plant explosion threatened 500 lives. I intervened, but despite my efforts, success eluded me unless a miracle occurred."
Archer's revelation shed light on his motives and internal conflict. He believed his heroism was futile, prompting him to seek a way to change his past and avert the events that had brought him to this despair.
"At that moment, a force restrained me, and Alaya spoke. 'Do you wish to save these 500 lives? It is impossible. Regardless of how history unfolds, these individuals are fated to die. If you persist, are you prepared to become a cog in the machine after your death? Entering a contract won't cure your body; you'll live two more years, enduring a painful death.'
"I agreed. Possessed by a grim determination, I altered my appearance and saved those doomed lives, though they were beyond salvation."
When Archer said this, everyone turned their attention to Emiya Kiritsugu. At this moment, they felt that these two people were so similar, they both wanted to be partners of justice, and they were both willing to sacrifice, but, this price must be very heavy.
Ignoring the eyes of these people, Archer continued to speak quietly
"I made a contract with the "world" in front of dying people, became a hero who invoked miracles, sacrificed myself to save all living beings, and a hero was born.
But even being called a hero doesn't make a difference in what I do. But it doesn't matter, my goal is not to become a hero, but this process needs the power of a hero no matter what. To save even a few, or to pursue justice, I'll throw myself into battle, even knowing death awaits."
"I don't expect the world to be free of conflict; I just hope no one will shed tears because of me... But every time in order to save the people in front of me, many people are always hurt, and in order to save those people, more people are killed. The more people I save, the bigger my vision becomes. When I realize that there are always people who cannot be saved, I can only choose to save more people by sacrificing some people. In order to minimize the victimization, I cut off those who could not be saved with my own hands as quickly as possible. In the end not even the lives of innocent people mattered."
When Archer spoke, Emiya Kiritsugu felt like he was looking at a mirror. Archer was a reflection of himself, but stronger. The more he saved, the more he killed—it was an endless cycle.
Emiya Kiritsugu understood Archer's feelings all too well. He had spent countless nights tormented by guilt. The difference was that Emiya Kiritsugu had Irisviel by his side, while Archer was alone.
"I used to have friends, family, and a lover, but I lost them all in my pursuit to save others. I became a tool of the Holy Grail, sacrificing lives to save a fraction of one. I believed it was right, but as the body count grew, I began to doubt myself," Archer said, his eyes devoid of the usual calmness, replaced with a longing for the boy in Kiritsugu's arms(Alexander gave the boy to him).
At this moment, Archer finally said his wish!
"So I want to erase my past self, only then can I erase my own existence! This life... I don't want it anymore! So, please, get out of the way, Father! I... I really don't want to continue like this."