Chapter 25 - Chapter 25: Teachers Pet

TW: Language, Mild Sexual Content, Mentions of SuicideDemian didn't go home after leaving Dracos, he was too upset after their conversation and decided he would instead go for a walk to black lake, it had been getting warmer every night and Demian missed the comfort he used to get just from being there.As he stepped outside into the front courtyard he sighed, remembering the last night he had actually been out here, with Higgs. He thought about his mother's face, her tears staining her cheek relentlessly and he felt his stomach twist to knots. Before he rounded the corner he heard a commanding voice behind him, "Young Master, a moment." He paused and turned to face his headmaster. "H-Headmaster?" He questioned. "Yes, can you come with me for a moment." Demian was in no position to refuse. He just nodded his head and followed Dumbledore up to his office, in silence. As they entered, the dim lighting emanated a comforting aura, but Demians heart was still beating out of his chest. The Headmaster simply walked around his ornate wooden desk, sitting down. He extended his hand to the seat in front of him, "Please, sit." He said. Demian did as he was told. "Have I done something wrong?" He questioned, the thump of his heartbeat pounding against his chest. "No, no, nothing like that." Dumbledore said. This made him relax a bit, but he still shifted in his seat. "It's about Terrence." He said, softly. Demians stomach dropped, and he swallowed nervously. "I'm sure you heard what happened to him." "I...I heard, through other people, yes." He lied. "So, you didn't see him before the incident?" Dumbledore inquired. "I mean, I.." He stammered, "I saw him at the party, the night before." "Yes. A lot of people did. And did you notice anything." Demian stopped for a moment, "He...He smiled a lot, even through his tears" Demian managed to choke out. "Yes, that's right." The headmaster rose from his seat, his hands intertwined behind his back. "That would be due to the vast amount of the Elixir of Euphoria he consumed." Demian picked nervously at his nails, staring downwards. "Yes, I heard." He said, simply. "I'm going to be transparent with you, Demian." He began, "I saw you outside of Madame Pomfreys the evening Higgs parents were here." "I..." He started to speak but was cut off suddenly,"Never mind why you were there, it's obvious you take a lot more interest than others in his wellbeing. No one else showed up even once, to visit." This made Demian sad, and he felt the guilt start to eat at him once more. "So, tell me, do you know how he acquired the potion, or maybe someone that might have given it to him intentionally?" Demian just shook his head, but he felt the need to be truthful with the Headmaster. "I don't, but-" He paused for a moment, the anxiety welling up, "But we did, at one point, have an intimate relationship. It's why I went to check on him." He told him, only revealing half the story.The Headmaster remained silent for a moment before finally responding, "I see. Well, if anything strikes you as odd, if you see or hear anything at all about the incident, please let me know. His parents would be grateful." Demian went to get up, but he couldn't stop the words from leaving his lips, "Is he still alive, Headmaster?" "He is." He replied. He let out a sigh of relief, he still couldn't smile, but just knowing he was alive was enough to keep him going. "Thank you, Valentino. You may go." Dumbledore said.Demian shook his head and turned around, leaving his office quickly. *.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*The next morning Demian went to breakfast, a newfound fire burning in him to figure out what might have happened to Higgs. He didn't want to believe he did it all by himself. That he wanted to kill himself. Those thoughts tormented Demian, thinking the role he possibly played in his demise. At breakfast, Draco wasn't in the Great Hall. Demian sat with his friends. It was the weekend before the O.W.L.s and everyone was either studying or doing whatever they could to relax. Peter had an arm around Penny, an annoyed look plastered on his face, "I'm so ready for these tests to be fucking over", he said, taking a large bite out of a piece of toast. "Agh, me too." Penny exclaimed; Mordred just sighed. "Stop talking about it, I'll go mad." He said. Demian shrugged his shoulders, "You guys should have studied more." They all shot him a look of daggers, Peter flipped him off, mocking him. "YoU gUys shOuld HavE stUdieD moRe." This made Demian laugh. "Hey man, it's true." "We can't all have naturally good memories and actually ENJOY taking notes." They all groaned in unison. "Oh god I hate taking notes." Penny said. "If you all huddle up real close, you can read mine together" Peter just flipped him off again as Demian tossed his notebook into the center of the table. They all three grabbed for it at once, Mordred being victorious. "Yesssssss." He said, thumbing through the pages while the other two pouted, only finding comfort in each other. "Guess we'll wait our turns." Penny said. She started to talk with Peter and Demians gaze trailed to the Slytherin table. He noticed Astoria, she seemed to be doing better these days. She smiled a flipped her dark hair, talking with some of the other Slytherins. Pansy was simply examining her nails, she rarely looked up and didn't seem to be eating. Crabbe and Goyle were deep into their plates, not a care in the world. At the end of the table Blaise Zabini sat, silently poking at his food. Demian knew that look all too well. Likely stressed for the exams like the rest of them. He just didn't have any leads. Usually, he would always suspect Astoria or Pansy, they had been the likely culprits all year after all. But the truth is Astoria seemed to have moved on, and Pansy, well, the bark was worse than the bite in his opinion. His stomach still sank when he thought of that night, but he'd never let her know he was actually still bothered by it. He sighed in annoyance, having figured out nothing. He picked at his food, and for the first time in a long time he was more concerned about his own problems, that where Draco might have been. *.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*Dracos POV Malfoy walked back up to the gates of Hogwarts, his mind racing with what had just happened. The way his father watched, the way his mother didn't intervene. The way Voldemort looked at him when the deed was done. He examined his hands again; they were slightly trembling. He walked silently back to his dorm and shut the door behind him. He made his way to his bed and cradled his own head in his hands. Why did I do it. Demian flashed into his mind. The dark lord threatening him rang throughout his ears. He could still see her face, hear her words as they begged for mercy. Malfoy got up and went to his dresser, he looked at himself his eyes seemingly hollow. Without warning he slammed both his hands down on top of the dresser, sweeping everything off and he screamed. Loud. His head fell in shame. But he still couldn't cry, and he didn't understand why that was. He thought about the night he lied to Demian about what he saw through his trinket. A magical artifact meant to only show things that made you happy. His hands around Pansys neck did excite him, but this low born muggle who'd done nothing to him. Who didn't even know him. The image of himself reflected back in her grief-stricken eyes haunted him. A mess littered the floor, Dracos thoughts tormenting him,How can I protect Demian from someone like him?And the answer never came. The truth was, with Demian as a liability they had him dead to rights. They could make them do whatever they wanted. This night had proven it. And that scared him. Terrified him. He had little hesitation when asked to do it, and all they had to do was mention him. The countless thoughts raced through his head, what they might make him endure next and what they might do if he doesn't cooperate. He paced back and forth what seemed like a thousand times, in his mind the image of his victim never leaving his thoughts.He did feel guilty, but the thought of them harming Demian surpassed all of that. He felt selfish. And he was. He was now even more convinced that his evil nature would one day consume him, and that put Demian at risk constantly, should he ever falter.What the fuck am I going to do. His hand found his forearm, decorated with that mark he once so desperately craved. He scratched at it, endless times, wishing for it to disappear. But it didn't. *.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*Demian left the Headmasters office in a hurry, his hands reaching protectively for the piece of jewelry around his neck. He recoiled thinking it might prick him, but this time, it didn't.He walked all the way to the Slytherin common room, determined to see Draco and to demand an apology. He was tired of being walked all over. He thought about his professor who encouraged him so many times before to find his voice. To stand up for himself. It gave him the courage to walk confidently into the common room, past every set of familiar eyes who witnessed him in his moment of certainty. He banged on Dracos door with confidence. "Draco, open the door." He said. A few moments went by and the door cracked open, Demian stepped inside. Draco stood there, a hollow look in his eyes, his arms folded meticulously to hide the raw scratches littering his forearm."What's going on?" Demian asked, "Why do you look so....sad." He said, his need for an apology slowly dissolving. "It's..." Draco thought for a moment. "I saw my father this weekend, it's getting too dangerous for me to see you right now." He said, quickly. Demian could tell he was nervous or frightened of something. "Draco what are you saying." Demian looked confused, he felt his chest tighten from anxiety. "I'm saying you should go." His voice cracked a bit, but he kept his arms folded. "Draco please...don't do this to me." Demian pleaded, desperate for answers. "Please, just tell me what's happened, we can fix it. Together. Just like Astoria, just like all the times before.""This isn't like all the times before!" Draco shouted at him, "This is nothing like all those times before." Demian just stood there, stunned for a moment before the tears started to fall freely down his cheeks, he wiped them with the back of his hand and choked out, "I love you Draco, don't leave me, you promised you wouldn't" Draco paused for a moment, although it was mere seconds it felt like a lifetime before he finally spoke, "You shouldn't love me." He stopped again, "Because I am what everyone thinks I am, a monster."Demian stepped closer to him and tried to protest, he reached his arm out and Draco moved slightly to avoid it, "You're not a monster, I know you're not." He said with desperation in his voice, "I can't do this without you." "Just get the fuck OUT of here half-blood!" He shouted, his words came out clear, but Draco couldn't look at him. Demian sobbed harder and studied Dracos face for a moment, pleading with his eyes for forgiveness, but he still wouldn't look in his direction. He pointed towards the door and Demian saw the wounds, raw and bleeding surrounding the terrifying mark. He felt a shiver down his spine and left without another word, his vision stained from tears. *.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*Demian left in a hurry, the common room was silent but there were plenty of bodies piled in as he left. "Lovers quarrel?" Pansy spat, looking over at him with a grin. He ignored her, desperate to find someone to confide in. His mind only went one place, Professor Valor. He walked mindlessly through the corridors, his tears refusing to dry up while he navigated the halls for the charms classroom. It was the middle of the day, on a Saturday, he wasn't even sure he would be there, but it was his best lead. He finally made it, the door was slightly cracked, and he went inside, Professor Valor suddenly stood up. "Valentino, what's happened?" He said worriedly, he walked towards him and without warning Demian hugged him again, the tears still streaming down his cheeks. "U-uh.. j-just One second, please," He unwrapped Demians arms from him and shut the door, that was slightly ajar. He sighed softly before turning back to him, "Come" He motioned for Demian and he returned back to his arms, his sobs slowly turning into sniffles. "Are you okay to sit now, so we can talk?" He said after a few minutes of gently rubbing his back. "Y-yes..." Demian stammered, his eyes tinged pink from the tears. They each sat, this time Professor Valor took the seat next to him at one of the desks. "Now, what's happened?" He said, concerned. "It's Draco...he says he can't be with me anymore..." He thought about mentioning the dark mark, but he was terrified of what he might think.Professor Valor sighed, he shook his head a bit and searched for what to say. "I told you that young love rarely works out." His words harsh but spoken softly. "Regardless, this isn't my area of expertise, I'm not that well versed in love myself." "R-really?" Demian said through his sniffles, "You seem like you just know everything, like you've done everything." Professor Valor laughed. "It comes with the job, knowing everything." He joked. Demian tried to smile, but he couldn't. "Come now, it's going to be alright." He said, gently lifting his chin up with his thumb. "You'll make it through this." he uttered, in a reassuring tone. Demian blushed, his cheeks became as red as his eyes. The Professor noticed this and quickly took his hand away. "That was a bit unprofessional. But, then again, most of this already was." He sighed. "I tried so hard, to keep things professional with you. Where did I go wrong.""You didn't do anything." Demian interjected, "It was me...." Professor Valor sat there for a moment, "Why are you so attached to me Demian, there's a million other teachers and students to confide in."Demian spoke quietly, looking down, "You were just, so nice to me. So comforting, since the moment we met." "It's my job you know, to encourage students. To uplift them and help them." Professor Valor said. "I know, but..." Demian paused, "You helped me in so many more ways than you know, I felt strong enough to finally hear my own voice, amongst all the rest. I stopped caring only about Draco, and finally started to find myself again, after feeling lost. Feeling..." He paused, saying the last part in a whisper, "Owned..."There was a sadness in Christians eyes, "You should know that love normally doesn't look like that, love is a partnership of equals." "But being with him feels so good, feeling so wanted, so desired..." "So controlled?" The professor said, "You look for answers from everyone else", he leaned forward, tapping Demians forehead, "When you're smart enough to know the truth already." Demian felt his cheeks grow hot again, "Yes well...before I met Draco, I felt lost for different reasons." "It's easy when someone else makes all the decisions for you, isn't it?" Christian said. "Admittedly so..." He responded. "Well, if you want to be as great as me one day, you'll learn early that controlling your own destiny feels so much better." He laughed quietly under his breath and Demian finally smiled. "You're right..." He sniffled once more, the tightness of the anxiety leaving his chest.Although the tears dried up, he felt hollow inside. "When will I feel better..." He asked, sadly. The Professor reached up, brushing his hair from his face. "Whenever your heart allows it." He said in a soft tone, "Now, you should really get some sleep."Demian nodded, his eyes stung and were heavy from all the crying. "Um...Professor?" He asked, "Yes?" "Can you please hold me, just once more..." He looked up at him with pleading eyes, begging for comfort. "You're going to get me fired, I can already tell." He responded, opening his arms. Demian leaned into his chest and felt his protective grip around him, for the first time he didn't hold back and gripped him tightly. "Thank you..." He whispered, trying to hold back his tears again. "You don't need to thank me." He said, gently squeezing him in his arms. "Now get to bed, you know the O.W.L.s are coming up, you should be focusing on that." Demian just nodded, relishing in this moment for as long as he could before he left. The feeling of emptiness following him all the way back to his dorm.