Suddenly, between him and me who has a child with me now, she is playing around freely and without any restraint. If we don't find her family soon, he next to me is too cute and I feel like I can't bear it anymore.
"Sunny likes big brother."
"Eh."
She has been leading me around everywhere along the way. I echo her words, and every time I feel the hem of my jacket being pulled backward. However, when I look down, at the same time she also averts her gaze.
"Do you want to hold hands?"
I stretch my empty left hand in front of him. This time he shakes his head from side to side and says quietly that he doesn't want to.
"Sunny wants to hold hands."
"... But I'm holding you now."
The small arm is pulling my left arm hard. But helplessly, I stroke her head with that hand, and she immediately becomes quiet. But at the same time, her hand gripping the jacket tightens even more. With such a cute person by my side, I really hope she can understand my mood of pretending to be calm. I look at the child in my arms resentfully.
"Ben?"
As soon as I call his name, the hand grasping the hem pulls even harder. Her expression of feelings is extraordinarily straightforward today, and I can't help but widen my eyes in surprise. But in response to my reaction, he suddenly looks into the distance.
"It's really troublesome. It would be a problem if I'm disliked because of this kind of thing."
"..."
I glance at his face looking down gently. He glances at me, then lowers his head again and sighs softly. I don't understand what he means and tilt my head in confusion. Suddenly, there are high-pitched screams around.
"Ah——!"
She suddenly starts struggling in someone else's arms. The two of us are instantly stunned and don't understand at all why she is unhappy.
"Brother. No! Sunny wants to marry you!"
"Eh?"
Hearing the reason for her tantrum, I can't help but be astonished. This little one, does she sense something between him and me?
"..."
Caught between her who is crying suddenly like there is a fire and him who stops his movements helplessly, an indescribable atmosphere spreads. Gradually, impolite gazes are cast around.
"So I said that a child's stubbornness is very scary."
He mutters this while sighing deeply. We look at each other and feel that we can't continue like this anymore, so we quickly leave there.
Holding her who is like an alarm, walking quickly in the park, soon we meet her family. It is an unexpectedly large family. It makes sense that they didn't notice one or two people missing. Now, a three-generation family with far more than fifteen people is very rare.
"Sorry! My child is really a face-connoisseur. Hey, quickly leave the brother."
While receiving an apology that I don't quite understand, I try to hand her over to her family, but she just won't let go. Her crying loudly makes her family in a flurry.
"Really sorry!"
"..."
Her parents forcibly pull apart their daughter who is tightly hugging the arm of a stranger and crying loudly and refusing to leave. They bow deeply several times and then leave.
The child's crying makes my ears buzzing. Finally, it becomes quiet around. I let out a sigh of relief all at once.
"Tired."
"Good job. But why do you think they are a large family?"
He murmurs while looking at the back of the large family. Hearing this sentence, I look at him and suddenly meet his gaze as he looks up.
"It's just a feeling, like the feeling of not being afraid of strangers, and also things like their clothes."
"Um."
He responds softly and looks forward again. I quietly look at his side profile. It's this face again, and I feel a wave of sadness. His eyes containing longing make me painful.
"A three-year-old child can grow so big."
"Yes. She can also speak a lot of words and run around everywhere. It's the time when she needs the most attention, right?"
"Yes."
His answer is a bit vague. Looking at his eyes looking into the distance which are different from before, there is a commotion in my chest. Today, I don't know how many times I have felt the heavy oppression in my chest.
"Do you want a child?"
"It's not like that."
"A child of Ben will definitely be very cute."
I smile at him showing a confused expression. Somehow he narrows his eyes unhappily and purses his lips.
"Stupid."
"Eh?"
I don't understand the meaning of this muttering from him. I tilt my head. He grasps my hem even tighter and even pulls me even closer.
"By the way, does Ben only have sisters?"
I don't understand why he was a bit unhappy just now. Thinking of finding some topics, I ask. He turns around upon hearing my question.
"Well, yes. I have two older sisters above me. The eldest sister is married but doesn't have a child yet. There aren't many people in my family."
"You have two sisters."
"What about Blake?"
"I'm an only child. I can't imagine what it's like to have siblings."
While answering his expectant gaze, I feel confused. He mutters "So that's how it is" again and then faces forward again. A hint of smile appears on his side profile.
"Are you in a better mood?"
"I'm not in a bad mood at all."
"It's just that I always feel a bit restless, uncomfortable in my heart, and my emotions are a bit unstable."
He mutters with a frown. Still not good at sorting out his feelings. Hearing him say this makes me feel embarrassed. He often says that I shouldn't say things that make him embarrassed, but the unconscious him is even more shy-making.
"Ben is really naive."
"Ah? Where am I naive?"
"All."
He is sincere and straightforward, without any difference between appearance and inside, gentle and lovely. Being envied by such a person gives me an extremely strong sense of superiority. The heavy burden in my heart seems to have lightened a bit.
"You are like this again, always looking down on people immediately."
"I'm not at all. And I've never looked down on Ben."
I smile and tilt my head, saying to him who is frowning and muttering in dissatisfaction. Somehow he pats my back several times.
"... Ben."
"What's wrong this time?"
"It's raining."
Feeling a drop of water falling on my cheek, I look up at the sky. The warm wind blows and more and more raindrops are falling.
"What is this? The weather forecast isn't completely wrong after all."
"It was sunny just now. The weather these days is really unpredictable."
Suddenly it starts raining. The two of us look up at the sky. People around start to look for places to shelter from the rain in a hurry. It was still blue sky just now, but somehow it is covered by dark clouds and gradually turns into gloomy rain clouds.
"This rain will become heavy."
"Eh?"
He mutters like talking to himself and suddenly grabs my arm and starts running. Behind him, the rain is getting heavier and heavier.