We all burst out laughing instantly, knowing that she was talking about Des in the same instant, while he just glared at the speaker, in pure shocked, more baffled than I've seen him in the last year. "She can't be talking about me, right?"
"She's absolutely talking about you!" Michel grinned.
"What? She's into that kind of animal kink?" The guy asked.
Selene burst out laughing, and it was the most beautiful hypnotizing and gorgeous sound I've ever heard, it sent chills down my spine, trills that got my cock aching hard inside my black sweatpants. "Oh? No. It's a guy. He came with his best friend's sister, whose my gynecologist, because that's not weird at all. He's totally Cassie's type, and she was drooling over him. But to me he looked like a dog. I don't know why, so don't ask me, but I just got a feeling he was like a dog. Cute, but not my type at all."
"Not tall enough?" Jung-jin chuckled, seemingly better.
"He's past 1.90m, but no. Not tall enough. He looks like an idol from a Korean-Japanese group, pretty handsome, looks way younger than he is, but it's Cassie whose into East-Asian youthful looking dudes. While Sera swings for both ways. I like them older, though not enough to be my father," her words made heat wash over my face, and it got worse with the naughty side-glares they sent my way. "Feeling better?"
"Considerably, thank you, noona. I'll name my child after you!"
"Then adopt one from Scotland, it'll make it more real. And you better make me the Godmother, or I'll kick your arse, again, Jung-jin!"
He giggled lively, "Okay, noona, I promise. I'll adopt two, Zale and Selene, both taking the names after you, Zalea Selene, noona."
"Good, good. Let them grow up with my kids."
"Are you dating, noona?"
That got a mocking giggle from her, "I haven't met anyone worthy of the magnanimous obnoxious nasty me yet. But I will, then I'll ring him up, make him my Count, and have seven kids. Maybe more if it happens, but planned, seven. Then we'll raise them in Rosewood Manor, and have a Scottish active life. I mean, it's harder given my work with MI6 and Interpol and he'll have to be okay with it, and with the fact that I've killed before. As soon as I find my Count, I'll marry him. Dating is a staircase that takes to marriage to me, that's why I never dated, because I haven't found my match. But maybe I will, Scotland is kinda mythical, we never know."
"Someone with a good cock!" Jung-jin added.
"Absolutely. A huge thick cock, and who knows how to fuck. Who knows where the clit is, and how to make a women cum, and who doesn't faint after cumming once," a dramatic sigh. "Hah, I guess I'll die single. I'm too old to go dating around."
"You are 27, noona," he gasped.
"Born in June 7th of 1996. Yes, I know. But I don't have the social energy to go around clubbing aside from missions where I'll get to kill the person I'm seducing. I guess being a secret agent fucked me up. Well, at least I'm hot and have almost no scars, and I'm a prodigy genius, and filthy rich. A part of me expects the men of my dreams to drop from the sky in my life, without me having to work for it. Though if that happened, I would get startle and probably kill him."
"Have you tried the psychiatrist of MI6, noona?" He chuckled.
"Why would I?" She mocked. "My mental issues make me the best in my work. I'm not a psychopath, since I have feeling, and neither am I a sociopath. But I'm definitely not normal, and that's okay. Who the fuck wants to be normal? It's so boring. I was born to be badass in whatever I do." After a small pause, she spoke again. "Done, I sent a text to the guard in my place in Mayfair, and he told me he'll let you in. There's a first aid kit under the coffee table of the leaving room at the left of the entry door."
"Thank you again for saving me, noona."
"Stop thanking me, Jung-jin. You have nothing to thank me for, I'm here if you need me for anything. Even if it's to kill your parents, it'll be totally understandable, by the way. There's meat in the kitchen, you can give it to your lil hellhound. Eat everything in there if you want, just take care of yourself, yeah? I'll be with you by noon after my meeting with uncle Heath. There's a full library in there, there's some Chinese queer fantasy historical novels translated to English in the far left corner near the leather couch. They all have my notes, I'll let you borrow them, they are amazing. Maybe it'll help you taking your head out of it!"
"She reads BL novels? She has my respect!" Michel beamed.
"Ugh, you're an angel, noona. That will help tremendously."
Her voice turned soft, "Don't let those arseholes words hold you back, Johnny Choi," is that his English name? "You are pure gold, love, and you deserve to be accepted as you are. Anyone who thinks otherwise do not deserve you. Cut all of them out. If your blood-relatives negate you, I'll be your family, yeah? Be yourself, cut total contact with them before they can drag you down through schemes and machinations to extort you from your money again. To call them cockroaches would be an offense to cockroaches, and what we do to cockroaches?"
"Ignore them?"
She scoffed, "Don't be a pussy, Jung-jin, we step on them and go on with our life as if they had never even come into our lives. Got it?"
"You are the best, noona. I'll do that."
"True, I am the best. Now, go. Rest. I'll see you tomorrow!" Selene said, sounding tired as if her throat was sore. "I talked too much. Talking drains my energy, ugh."
"I'm sorry, noona. It's my fault."
She let out a curse in Gaelic, "If you say sorry one more time, Jung-jin, I'll cover the bruise your father left on your face with my own. You have no reasons to apologize, damn it. Put yourself together, brat, come on. Do not apologize to anyone, raise your chin up, swallow your words, hold your ground. You did nothing wrong."
"I… I'll do my best, noona. I've just arrived at your place."
"Go, Jung-jin. Rest, you need it. See you tomorrow!"
Selene hang up and let out a series of curses in German, English, Gaelic, and French, her voice getting raspier. "Those cockroaches better pray they never run into me, or I'll bury them 7 feet deep, alive, in the outskirts of fucking Scotland where no one will ever find them. And if someone does, I'll just kill them too. Disgusting pieces of garbage, I can't believe this."
Then came a noise of her drinking something, probably that Irish coffee she was making. I love Irish coffee, it makes me want to taste hers, and make mine for her to see if she enjoys.
"They are luck I'm not in London right now, so, so, so lucky. And I'm so tired, God, I'm tired," she sighed, and we heard a sound of her siting down on something. "Ugh, my head aches. Maybe the girls are right, I do need to get laid, but getting badly fucked will worsen my stress. Ugh, ugh," we heard a noisy of her jumping down.
"Chocolate. I need chocolate. Ice cream. Ah-hah," she yelp like a child, which was a total contrast to her attitude so far, "I still have my dark chocolate Magnum ice cream tub. Yes. That's what I need, ice cream, and my Kdrama," she beamed, closing a fridge door. "Just the last episode of Destined With You and I'll sleep. Tomorrow is a big day for us, for me, for all I've worked so far to get, right mom and dad? You wouldn't have left your journals for me in the will, if you didn't want me to solve this. And if I'm alive at the end, I'll retire from this before I go Joker." Then she ran up some stairs. "London bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down. London bridge is falling down, my fair Lady!" She sang far away.
Her perfect siren-ish voice disappearing as she closed herself in a room that's probably soundproof, as we can't get sound from it, and we stared at each other, absolutely baffled.
"Hmmm, Eric, she doesn't seem very sane," Cael was the one to break the silence that descended between us. "Seems like the rumors about the Countess being out of her mind and lil bit wicked were true."
"I think she's amazing," Michel beamed.
"Amazingly wicked," Des mocked. "Selene is mentally ill, bro."
"Aren't us all?" Michel countered, in her defense.
"Well, I'm not a murderer," Cael scoffed.
"You are the elephant in the room, Caelan," Michel mocked. "The three of us have killed countless people in our missions. Eric more than us, and probably even more than her. Who are we to judge? You work helping us kill those people, you are a killer by third party."
"That's not a thing," he gasped horrified.
"It is!" Michel and Des stated matter-of-factly.
"Aren't you gonna say anything, Eric?" Cael growled at me.
I blinked dazed, "She wants seven kids," I mumbled to myself.
"Oh, God, we lost him to the siren's song," Caelan slapped his own forehead. "Earth to Achilleas, come on, man. Snap out of it."
"I'm just taken off guard by the fact that she's betting everything on this mission, and wants to retire form the field if she's still alive by the end of it. It's just… a whole other level of deep commitment with a cause. And she just confirmed she has the journals, she's probably hiding that from Phoenix. Phoenix, who happens to be her Godfather, closer to her enough that she knows his family, calls him uncle, and knows his identity. Phoenix who lied to me about her, and even then, handed me the files she is after."
Finishing my 8th and last slice of pizza, I cleaned my hands on the napkin and passed the one I hadn't used for the food, over my hair.
"Do you think he could be plotting something?" Des asked tense.
"The Phoenix?" He nodded at me. "I guess we'll find out. Now," I stood up, grabbing the speaker, the lens, and my phone. "Let me get you the money in physical pounds, talk to my pilot to prepare the jet for me to head to London, then I'll analyze the images you go from her with the lens."
It makes so at each time he blinked, it took a new photo. No video.
"What a way to say you will isolate in your cave that you socially call a bedroom, take care of the bone you got just from hearing her sireny voice, and then obsess over the pictures I got with the lens," Des provoked.
"Fuck off, Desmond!" I gave him the middle finger.
Well, he's not wrong.