Chereads / Regrets of the Hero party / Chapter 4 - Regrets (Safa point of view)

Chapter 4 - Regrets (Safa point of view)

My name is Safa, but people call me Sword Princess due to my skill with the sword.

When we turned 15, my friends and I left the orphanage where we grew to become adventurers. We formed a party, The Silver Knights and quickly climbed up the ranks. We were all talented at the exception of one person, Jama.

It's not that he was weak, it's just that compared to us, he was average.

I would have kicked him out of the party, but we were friends coming from the same orphanage. Plus, he was useful. He was taking care of the chores. He cooked our meals, cleaned our house, wash our clothes … He was even taking care of the equipment, polishing our armours, and sharpening our swords. During missions, he was carrying our stuffs.

Kicking him out would be a waste, so I put up with him.

But one day, I accepted a quest which turned out to be a disaster. At that time, our party was A rank, with all members also being A rank, except of course Jama. We were supposed to clear a B rank dungeon. However, it turned out to be a mix dungeon. It was filled with monsters of different ranks, even S rank.

That day, as leader of the party, I had to make a decision. Surrounded by S rank behemoths, I used Jama as decoy to allow the rest to flee. I was sure it was the right choice. Jama was just a porter and a chore-boy. He was not that important to the party. So, we trapped him with the monsters and took this opportunity to run out of the dungeon.

We returned to guild to make our rapport. We also reported Jama's death. I told the guild master that he has sacrificed himself to save us, which was technically the truth.

The guild master dismissed us after promising to assemble a squad of S rank adventurers to clear up the dungeon. He also promised us to bring back Jama corpse if they ever found it. It was useless. Jama must be in a behemoth stomach by now.

The next day, I woke up hungry. Of course, Jama wasn't there to cook for us, so I had to eat outside. However, after eating out for a whole week, I grew tired and tried to cook myself. It was a disaster. I didn't know a human could cook so bad. Come to think of it, when was the last time I cooked. Did I ever cook. The answer turns out to be ''no''. None of us ever did. It was Jama who was taking care of it.

Left with no other option, I hired a housemaid. She easily took care of the house chores. The house which had accumulate waste for a whole week was cleaned up. I guess anybody can do chores (except us). You don't need to be Jama.

Few days later, I got summoned to the guild. The adventurers who went to take care of the dungeon returned, at least 2 returned. The other 7 were all killed. That dungeon was much more dangerous than expected. The adventurers sent were all S rank. We were lucky to have escaped. I was grateful to Jama, he may have been useless, but his sacrifice saved us!

Fortunately, the dungeon was in the middle of nowhere. Civilians' life wasn't at stake. Not being a pressing matter, our guild master decided to entrust it to higher authorities. So, we resumed our life as if nothing happened.

...

One day, I was coming home late after a meeting with the guild officials about our next mission. Why do they always do these meeting during dinner. They may fancy those high-class restaurants, but I do not. They try to be friendly, making small talks, but I hated it. I prefer brief meetings. You just give me the important points and let me plan the rest. No need to spend hours. I always hated those meeting, but I had no choice as the party leader.

- I can't wait to be home! I said as I picked up the pace.

I arrived home and opened the door, only to be greet by silence. Oh, right, Jama is no longer here. I let out a sigh and went to my room. I took a shower and sat on my bed. Something wasn't right.

- Ice cream!

Yeah, Jama would always bring me ice cream when I was down. He knew I love sweet thing, unlike the guild master. He may not be here, but I could still get some. I went out to buy some. But they weren't as sweet as before. I ate alone in my room.

...

The next day, I held a meeting with the party to discuss our new quest. Everything went well until we got to the point of food and equipment.

- We will be gone for a least 2 days, right? Jio asked.

- Yes! Don't worry, I'll have the maid prepare more food and I'll get a porter to carry our stuff!

We didn't specifically need Jama. His work was not that special, and others could do it. No problem.

However, I was partially right.

First, the maid could prepare our food, but she asked for more money. It wasn't specified anywhere in her contract that she had to prepare extra meals. No problem, I paid her a bonus and she cooked us some foods even though they were crude. I had to pack them myself, but no problem.

Second, the porter asked to be paid half in advance in case we all got killed. He only showed up the day of the departure. During the quest, he didn't even say a word to us and was staying behind us, avoiding any battle. The day of the return, he simply left our stuff in the carriage and disappeared after receiving the other half of his pay. He didn't even say goodbye. Still no problem, we were simply his employers. He doesn't need to be friendly.

I went to the guild to retrieve our reward. When I gave everyone their share, they all left the house. I was there, all alone. I felt lonely. I remembered how Jama would bring me ice cream after a mission and stay to talk. I realised why I kept him around. He was the only one talking to me.

Shaq became full of himself after becoming a Saint and spent all his time at the church.

Terek is always chasing women.

Jio is either at the academy, or in her room.

Jama was the only one greeting me when I was coming home late. He was always comforting me when I was overworked. People called me the Sword Princess, but for him I was just Safa, his childhood friend.

An image of him banging the ice wall came to my mind.

- Why?

Tears started coming down my cheeks.

- Why did I leave him?

At that time, he made a plan for all of us to escape. He wasn't trying to save himself. Unlike me, the leader, he was thinking about the whole party. Despite that I choose to leave him there.

I fell on my knees, unable to shake the image of Jama out of my mind.

- Jama …

Why? Why did I do that? Why did I see him as useless?

So, what if he was weak, he wasn't dragging the party down. He was just one rank below. He was carrying our stuff, he was cooking for us. He knew what I like and always prepared them for me. He always listened when I was complaining.

He never did anything wrong.

- Jama …

Wait, it's only been a few days. Maybe he hides somewhere. Yes, knowing him, he may, no he surely escaped the monsters and hides somewhere.

I took my sword and ran outside. I didn't even bother taking a horse, I just ran.

...

I ran for a long time.

I felt my heart beating as fast as possible; I was out of breath and my legs were heavy. But I didn't stop. I need to get there. I was the Sword Princess. I should be able to run a few hundred kilometers.

I eventually stumbled and fell, loosing my sword. I looked around, trying to find it only realised I was in a forest.

I heard footsteps. I turned to see a few orcs charging at me. I tried to get up, but my legs were too heavy. I have been running for hours.

(Am I going to die?)

Beaten to death by a horde of monsters. Maybe this was my punishment. Even God is mad at me for abandoning my precious friend. But …

The first orc swung his weapon, I dodged and punched its face hard enough to behead it. Leaning on its body, I got up despite my heavy legs.

- I can't die here!

I'll receive my punishment no matter how harsh it'll be. But for now, I need to save Jama! I know he is still alive. I must rescue him.

I gathered all my strength and charged at the horde. I had no weapon, so I just punched. I punched, again and again, but they were no end to them. My body was hurting, I could feel my muscles tearing up due to the fatigue. Nevertheless, I kept going. Jama was waiting for me. I have to keep going.

Just after breaking one orc neck, I got hit by a weapon as big as me. I got blown off but managed to regain myself mid-air and landed somewhat safely. However, my left arm was broken.

The monster which had hit me was an orc king, an A rank monster. Plus, there were still other orcs. This is bad. But Jama was all alone with S rank monster. This is nothing. I clenched my fists and try to attack.

However, the orc king suddenly exploded. The explosion was big enough to also take down some of the orcs around it.

I felt a palm on my shoulder and turned to throw a punch. But my hand was caught.

- Leader, are you ok?

I was looking at the person behind me, but my vision was too clouded for me to recognise them. Still, the voice was familiar.

- Thanks God, you're ok!

- Terek?

- Yes, it's me! Oh my god, what's happened to you?

I felt my body getting lighter and my vision clearer. The pain in my arm was also subsisting.

Terek was holding me in his arms and Shaq was healing me. Jio was blasting the orcs with so much fire power that they had to retreat.

- Guys, what are you doing here?

- That's my line! Why did you suddenly run out of the city? You have a death wish or something? I

- …

I hesitate for a moment. Jama wasn't getting along with those guys, especially Shaq. During missions, they were always arguing. They were happy to leave Jama behind. They wouldn't want to bring him back now.

No! It doesn't matter what they want. I have to save Jama.

- I was going to the dungeon!

- Dungeon?

- Yes! I have to save him! Jama is waiting for me!

- What?

I knew they wouldn't be happy. But it doesn't matter. I got up and tried to continue only to be stopped.

- Get out of the way, Shaq!

- Safa, Jama is dead!

- No, he is not! He is hiding somewhere!

- It's been a month!

- Yes, just a month! Jama is resourceful! One month is nothing!

- HUMANS CAN'T LIVE FOR A MONTH WITH NO FOOD OR WATER! …

Upon hearing Shaq words, something broke in me.

- Jama is alive! I know it!

Saying so, I turned around but once again Shaq caught my hand.

- No, he is dead!

I vigorously shook his hand off.

- NO, YOU'RE LYING!!! … YOU'RE LYING! YOU'RE LYING! YOU'RE LYING!! …

My teammates didn't reply. They were just looking at me. These eyes, they were filled with pity.

- You're lying!! …

They were still not replying. I couldn't bear it because I knew they were right. But I couldn't admit it. Because if I do, I will never see Jama again.

- Jama is alive!

Please say something. Tell me that he is alive.

- …

But they were still silent. I could no longer contain my tears. I collapsed on my knees, crying as hard as I could.

Deep down inside me, I knew that they were no way, Jama would have survived for so long. I just didn't want to admit it. Maybe all I wanted was to get killed. I wanted to be punished. Dying the same death as him.

Jio hugged from behind. This made me cry even more.

I would never see Jama again. I knew it. But I couldn't accept it. If I don't have him by my side, I'm as good as dead.

Shaq and Terek joined us, and we all cry there till morning.

 

...

Since that day, the world became gray. Nothing was pleasing. I could drink beer as much as I could eat ice cream. They no longer have flavor.

I wasn't the only one. The whole party was depressing. It looked like they also came to miss Jama. Just like me, they took him for granted and neglected him despite loving him. We were all idiots.

Whenever I closed my eyes, all I could see was Jama banging against the ice wall. I wasn't the only one. It seemed that everyone couldn't sleep either. So, to distract ourselves, we hunted monsters. We kept accepting dangerous quest that no one else would take.

Either be night or day, we were hunting monsters. It didn't matter what race or rank they were, we just kept killing them.

We could go for days at a time, relying on Shaq magic to clear our fatigue.

Before I knew, we had killed the Demon Lord and became known as the Hero party.

- Heroes, right! What kind of heroes leave their friend to die?

Wherever we went, people were cheering for us, thanking us, giving us gifts. Even though all their gratitude was tearing my heart, they kept going.

- Can't you understand that I'm no hero? That's exactly what a hero would say! The King replied while giving my medal.

But I really wasn't a hero. None of us was. We were just traitors.

We challenged the Demon Lord and his army, not to be acclaimed, but to die a painful death. Despite all odds, we survived and even became heroes. We became insanely strong. No weapon could even pierce my skin. Even the Demon Lord could no longer harm us and just got defeated.

- Where is my punishment? Why am I not suffering? I don't deserve their praise. I'm just a betrayer who need to be die all alone in the middle of nowhere, forgotten by everyone. Why God? Why?

- Maybe that's our chance to make amend.

- What do you mean, Shaq?

- Simply dying won't do any good! Death is just an end.

- So what?

- They are other people who are suffering in this world. People who have nowhere to go, nothing to eat.

- What do you mean?

- I'm going to open a hospital. I'll treat people, even if they have no money.

- Ha! And how would you keep your hospital running if the patients are not paying?

- If the rewards we got are not enough, I'll keep hunting monsters!

I couldn't believe it. Shaq, the most selfish person I know, would work to help peoples. Maybe that's it. God kept us alive to make amends. We can no longer do anything for Jama, but we can save others.

Just like that, our new goal was clear. Shaq opened a hospital and Jio opened an orphanage. Terek and I kept working as adventurer to support them financially.

Contrary to our expectations, we weren't losing money. Instead, we were making more. The patients were paying. Even the poor ones were giving us what they could. So, Shaq opened more hospitals, and Jio opened more orphanages. We even had to hire more people to help. Yet we kept growing.

We received support form the population who kept making donations. The nobles and royalties also help funded the orphanages. The monster corpses we killed were auctioned instead of simply being sold. 

Soon, our influence went further than the country. We were active on the whole continent.

We didn't keep all this money. We used it to reach other areas like agriculture, education and food catering.

We eventually built an entire city. We called it ''Mi-an'' as a way to apologize.

It was located a few kilometers away of the dungeon where we betrayed our friend, which by the way had never been cleared out. We put an old acquaintance Francis, a former S rank adventurer as guild master to protect the city. And every year, at the anniversary of the death of the Demon Lord, we visit Mi-an city. We didn't know the exact date of Jama's death, so we choose the Demon Lord death as the Memorial Day.

This year again, we came back. Francis was quite overjoyed. Apparently, he had found an incredible man who is supposed to be more powerful than a normal S rank adventurer. He insisted we meet him. Having no reason to refuse, I accepted. I was curious about a guy who could easily defeat Francis. If he is good enough, I can appoint him somewhere. So that night, we were waiting for that mysterious person in his office.

Sometimes later, Francis's assistant came back with that person. However, as soon as the door opened, he attacked me. Despite my surprise, I still managed to dodge his attack and retaliate.

I was impressed. The mysterious assailant was still conscious after taking one of my punches. This guy was definitely stronger than S rank. Maybe he was one of the Demon Lord minions looking for revenge. We had to interrogate him, so I tried to subdue him. But he managed to break free and escaped. Fortunately, Jio hit him with a spell.

- Thanks, Jio! Seem that I'm getting rusty after fighting small fries for so long!

- No problem! That man was strangely strong!

Suddenly, the guild master came to kneel before me.

- Sword Princess, please forgive me! I … I

- Easy Francis! Could have happened to anyone!

- No! I mean you entrusted the safety of this city to me! And I let such a dangerous man roamed free for 2 months! I … I'm so sorry!

- 2 months? This guy waited for so long? He must really want to kill me!

I turned the masked man to put him on his back.

- Time to see who my mysterious assailant is!

I removed the man's mask and took a look at his face.

- No! … Can't be!

The assailant, the person lying in front of me. Someone I thought I had lost. Someone I thought I'd never see again. He was …

- Jama!