Elders were stupefied.
"We forgot to consider the low Qi amount this month old baby has. Or rather we did not expect him to use it repeatedly." The grand elder giggled, "In fact, this already was a very impressive feat. Most children at the age of ten would not be able to use this thing once. Or rather they could put things in there, but would not be able to take anything out. How many times he took out the box – was it ten or eleven? Let's wait for him to wake up and continue as if nothing happened."
Elder Agnes slowly circulated her Qi in Nick's body to remove the exhaustion. After half an hour he woke up. He opened his eyes, quickly assessed the situation and asked, "How long was I out?"
"About half an hour." Elder Agnes replied smilingly. For her it was always 'fun' to research fetuses and newborns, and currently there was a unique specimen on her lap.
Nick nodded, "This is a very interesting item. We don't have a material with such unique characteristics in Hell."
The grand elder smiled, he was certain that even Primeval demon Belial would like such thing. But suddenly his expression changed – Nick threw the ring on the table and said, "Not interested."
This time all the elders had shock on their faces, even the playful elder Agnes.
"Lord Baal!" Elder Silvio stood up and did a small bow towards Nick, "This is one of the most precious items from our treasury. Do you find in not to be satisfactory because of the yesterday's incident?"
The choice of the ring was his idea, but now not only he had shamed himself in front of the other elders, it looked like he even made a mess.
"Hahaha!" Nick started laughing, "Why are you so stiff? The yesterday's matter is water under the bridge already. If you want to compensate me in any way – just bring me a glass of fresh milk. Regarding this ring, I can confirm that it is an amazing and … well … a very convenient item, I just don't want it."
"Milk ... really?" Looking at the stupefied expressions of other elders, the grand elder managed to blurt out.
"Why not?" Nick was still laughing, "Don't tell me you don't have any available. I was told that the main ingredient for my food is milk."
"Of course, Lord Baal!" Elder Jan hurried to use the situation, "One of my contracted mounts, a level three horned elephant delivered few days ago. I will send an apprentice to fetch a glass of milk right away."
The grand elder was looking at Nick as if he was trying to see through him, "Lord Baal, regarding the milk I can understand – you just don't care about what transpired and will drink it as a symbol of showing your friendship. But the ring is really precious and we have no qualms of giving it to you!"
'What friendship, what symbol?' It was Nick's turn to be stupefied, 'I just want a glass of milk! I haven't had any decent baby food since I was born here! Wait. They are trying to push this ring on me again! I have to think of something.'
Nick looked back at the grand elder, then the others and, after thinking for a minute, said, "Do you consider me a donkey?"
"Lord Baal, no! Why would you even ask such thing!" Everyone was still confused as they tried to 'pacify' Nick.
"If you don't consider me a donkey, why would you try to make me carry around a whole cubic meter of luggage?" Nick smirked.
"But that is the trick – no one knows that you have those things! It is very convenient!" Elder Silvio still tried to persuade.
"Ok, let me explain to you in simpler terms." Nick tried to make as serious face as he could while preparing to launch the first insult of today, "If I shoved this little box up your ass and threw you out to take a walk around the outer sect – no one would see what I have done, right? But you would still know!"
He took a short theatrical pause and looked around, "Then how can you expect that I, the Primeval demon, would carry a cubic meter of luggage? Even if no one else knows about it, I still do! I have people for that, thousands of people to carry and guard my stuff! I don't carry anything and I don't intend to carry. I don't intend to tie luggage to myself like you do to donkeys!"
Elder Silvio listened with his mouth wide open. He did not even notice the insult.
"Erm." The grand elder tried to help him out, "We can see that there are huge cultural differences between the Hell and the surface and I believe that you as well, Lord Baal, would be interested to learn and exchange experiences. For example, we would like to present this glass of milk as a small symbol of our friendship." He gave a hand signal to the apprentice who just came in with the milk to bring it over to Nick, and then continued, "Would you like to perform the handshake ritual?"
It was Nick's turn to have mouth hanging open wide, 'What is wrong with these people? Do they really think the handshake is something special? In that case … maybe I can try out something fun a bit later?'
He managed to pull himself together, waved his hand and said, "It's just a milk, why would we shake on that?"
The grand elder and elder Silvio locked their gazes and nodded, 'Just as we thought, there is much more to this ritual! It really is not that simple since he does not want to use it every time. May be there are some costs attached to it?' They have already planned to have a question about the handshake, but they had to ask more important ones first.
"As you wish, Lord Baal." The grand elder nodded and watched Nick gulping down the milk.
Nick's was delighted. He finally got some real pure milk. Although this was not the 'classic' 2% he used to drink, it was still a treat. Nick finished the whole glass in one go, then burped and wiped off the thin white mustache.
"Would you like to talk about the main reasons why we have all gathered here?" Nick said while leaning back into elder Agnes's lap.
"Yes, Lord Baal." The grand elder cleared his throat, "To start a barter like common merchants, that was our mistake, but in the future we would like to collaborate on equal grounds. It is obvious that someone sometimes looses a bit and sometimes wins, but if we look from the long term perspective, it will even out." He expectantly looked at Nick's face, but did not manage to see anything. "We would like to propose an equal exchange: for the each Qi technique we would like to have a right to a question, but for the special meditation technique we want to ask a personal question. How do you see that? It is fair, isn't it?"
Nick forcefully stopped himself from answering immediately. Since he decided to take his time before saying anything, he should just follow that rule and use the time appropriately.
After few minutes he raised his head and smiled, "In theory it seems very nice, but looks like you don't value the worth of a personal question high enough. I am a Primeval demon! Asking a personal question is one thing, but getting an answer under the ritual of handshaking is something completely different!"
The grand elder was expecting such card from the opposite player. He asked, "What do you propose, Lord Baal?"
Nick fell in deep thought and this time for real. He knew what he wanted, the question was how to formulate it in words so he could get it. It did not matter if he got to answer one or two more questions, he would just make something up anyway. Of course, from the view point of elders it looked like the devious demon in the child's skin was calculating the odds and planning how to scam them more efficiently.
"You showed your sincerity just a moment ago, so I guess I should also take a step back and let you have small wins. Let's have the three plus one offer you made, just throw in as an extra that funny movement technique of his." Nick pointed at elder Sonor.
Elder Sonor on the other hand almost fell off the chair. His face turned red, but then surprisingly he did multiple deep inhales-exhales, closed his eyes and, probably, pretended to meditate again.
The grand elder was shocked as well, "Lord Baal, please excuse the elder's reaction just now. As you know, the meditation technique is very special and only two people know and use it. But the footwork technique you just asked for is his clan's heritage. You see, elder Sonor is the descendant of an ancient aristocratic family from the Nestri continent and he is the only descendant. This technique will be passed over only to the direct heir, moreover there are extreme requirements to use it and, what is most important, I can basically guarantee you won't be able to learn it."
"Oh, I did not know it was such a big deal. It was just another whim." Nick pretended to give up, "I am not going to take advantage of an orphan. I am demon, not a monster. Since you can't pay for it, let's just drop the personal question part and make a deal about the three Qi techniques." He knew the elders would very much like to ask those personal questions, but the fake answers were still fake. If he could learn the technique, good. If not – there was a lot for him to learn and the fake answers were limited – he did his best to not ruin the lie system he created. It was a basic principle that sooner or later the liar will mess up and the lies will be exposed. Thus he had to keep lying to a minimum.
The ball was on the grand elder's side of the field. He suspected such situation could come up, they even practiced few scenarios, but this footwork technique … even he did not know it. He had few techniques almost as good, but – this was one of the main reasons elder Sonor was the best Qi sword master. But they had to find a way to ask a personal question, it was crucial to their plan.
"Elder Sonor." The grand elder turned to his friend and colleague, "What is your opinion on this situation? A unique hereditary technique, that person will not be able to master and is so useless to them it basically will stay within these walls, versus a personal question to the Primeval existence."
In the beginning elder Sonor still sat there like a stone slab, but when he heard the grand elder finishing his thought, he understood the obvious implication. They are going to seal or kill this body of Belial anyway! They discussed it previously and pretty soon he himself might be able to perform the task. He held back a smile and nodded.
"Lord Baal!" The grand elder was happy elder Sonor understood him so well, "We would like to exchange the three techniques for three answers to general questions and two special techniques for answers to two personal questions."
"Hahaha," Nick laughed, "I see where you are going. Not bad, not bad. You learn fast! Ok, let's finalize. Give me a minute." He was ready to state the rules, maybe do some alterations and then it would be fine, but stopped himself.
'Wait! I have to think about this. No rush – it is them who might die from the old age, not me.'
Nick was thinking for a minute, then another one, then said, "Excuse me gentlemen. Little girl, bring me out to the balcony, I want to think a for bit. I hope you all don't have any objections."
The grand elder nodded and elder Agnes carried him out and put in the sun. Nick waved her off and sat there thinking. After a moment he started performing few simple stretching and power exercises, to make the thinking process less tedious. He was an athlete after all and was used to think while running. Physical exercises did help to relax his mind and, in fact, it was possible he had to thank them for his incredible progress in studying languages.
'It's not a problem for me to tell some fairy tales. I still can always think of a few more. These people are nuts anyway, they will believe … f*ck! They are nuts! The grand elder's words were '… techniques will stay within these walls'! They are going to kill me after this! Obviously they tried to give me such a precious gift just because there is a blade on my neck already! How the hell do I stop that from happening? What do I even have to offer besides fairy tales?'