I was laying on my back. Laying atop a shattered building. The sun was shining down, warming the pavement, warming my cold body. I stared above to the smoking sky. The deathly silence surrounding. I lost control. Completely and totally. My time as a monkey playing in my mind like a degraded movie reel.
Still shots appeared and burned away, stilted and skipped. I was pissed that I was denied the chance to fight him. That I missed out on a once in a lifetime opportunity. That man had something I wanted. A power I needed to replicate, to feel with my own flesh and bones. To experience with my own body and mind…
But, that wasn't what had me bothered. No it was a chilling clarity. A possible realization like waking in the middle of the night soaked in sweat after a fever dream. This wasn't a dream. I could hear them screaming as the monkey attacked. As I was forced to sit back and watch. People dying as they were blended together, children crying and wailing for their parents.
I could have fought for the wheel. Demanded it, but I was too numbed by the realization. No, what made it worse was how I let it control me. I was like a child denied their dessert. A child whose toy was taken away and I threw a tantrum. The thought… wasn't pleasant. Like any adult I thought myself better than to act like a child. But… maybe I was more childish than I'd like to admit. And it wasn't just because of my body, but me.
I didn't want this to be real. I wanted this to be a dream. A power fantasy of the highest order…
Now? I was tired, an exhaustion to the bone. It bled into my body making me feel listless and lost. Even the sun warming me did little to lift my mood. Like a child realizing, realizing that their tantrum didn't help. That it only made things worse. No dessert. No toys. Nothing. What awaited was only a distinct silence. A timeout as it were…
"Fuck…" I said, letting it drift onto the wind. I didn't want to stay here. No, I couldn't even if I wanted to. My clothes were effectively done for. My boots though were still practically untouched. It made me feel better, but only just…
I got up and looked over the devastated landscape. The destroyed buildings. The still air filled with the scent of death. The rot and decay hadn't yet set in, but it would soon. The thought only made me move faster as I leapt off the slab. I landed, the crunch of rubble under foot echoing in the ruins of the city. It looked clear, clean…
But the more you looked the more you saw. Hands outstretched. Bodies crunched under concrete, hidden only by a thin layer of ash and dust. I walked, taking in the devastation. Empty… cold… I stopped as I saw what looked like the top of a skyscraper, its pointed top speared into the earth. The sight inside… A mass of bodies all mashed together as if the top of the building had been ripped off and shaken like a magic eight ball… The contents mixed and beaten from the shaking. Forming a singular mass of meat and random material.
I didn't feel sick. There was no gag reflex as I looked over the damage I wrought. As I went, I eyed, begging for a response, a single tear, a little bit of a sob. Something that told me that I was still in fact human. What returned was an emptiness. A resounding response of nothing. What made me sick was the small thread of satisfaction settling in the pit of my stomach. of a job well done…
I found clothes easily enough as I made my way to an elevator. A smashed store, its contents spilled out along the streets. Almost like a disemboweled beast. I didn't bother to find something in my size. Only grabbing something to cover me as I went.
At the elevator, one of many entrances to the city, I saw people milling about. A makeshift camp was set up for rescue teams to work. Guards stopped me and for a moment I thought I was going to have to kill them… That feeling intensifying as they point something at me, but… My own listlessness kept me from acting. My own drained emotions. Empty and watered down kept me from reacting. A saving grace. If anything, it made me look like just another refugee. Fancy that.
"Rettas?" He asked, well, less asked and more demanded. "Mm…" I reply softly, not trusting my voice.
"You planning to use the elevator?"
"I want to leave this shithole." I said with far more vehemence than I thought possible. The man nodding. "That's fine. A lot of other people have the same plan. The elevators are on lockdown, but the disappearance of the giant enabled us to get authorization to open them. Which means your free to go."
I had the feeling, a notion, that he was misunderstanding something. This feeling intensified as I went down the elevator. The gazes of the guards and security only made me more upset. I nearly lashed out as I heard a whisper, "You did good surviving…" I didn't see who said it, but I could feel it. The loss, the listlessness.
They thought I had barely survived. Hid myself somewhere cowering from the beast, the giant as they called it… If they knew… My hands clenched at the thought of seeing their accusing glares. It wouldn't have bothered me before… they were inferior, trash… Garbage… But… the more I tried to say so, to define them as such. The more I felt myself denying it.
Not because they weren't, but because… I wanted their acknowledgement. It was what Rettas desired, what I desired. A compliment. A gentle smile… I didn't even know how I made it to my Attack Ball. Nor when I got in as it was moved to the spaceport for launching. I was leaning back, thinking, brooding.
My eyes closed as it lurched and launched towards my destination… Before the systems forced me into hibernation… I had a flash, a familiar glimpse. A whispered word.
"Mother…" I whispered. My eyes closed to a dreamless sleep. Seeking a warmth, I knew would not come. Not in this life, or the next.
My plan… it was a simple one, but one I was beginning to question. I wasn't sure why. But it stuck to me, like a bone in my throat. Poppy seeds in the teeth after eating a Chicago style hot dog. It stuck and bothered me even in my dreamless sleep. My subconscious roiled.
I was heading to the edges of DEPP… my plan was to go around causing trouble, to escalate an issue to military action. I needed a fight, and I didn't know how to best seek it. In a way, maybe it was because of the massacre I had committed. I wasn't satisfied. Only satiated, no, more like chastised. My boiling blood quiet like a child spanked.
A part of me wished to be condemned. Chased and hunted. A piece of me desired it. My blood begged for the conflict. Pushing me to the brink.
It wasn't pleasant. It was a familiar feeling, a pressure on my shoulders. It held me back, like concrete on my feet. Sinking me deeper and deeper. I feared when I woke. Even as my sleep was empty, it wasn't a pleasant emptiness. More like an abyss. Swallowing and devouring. I didn't wish to wake. To sink deeper into the depths. Deeper and deeper. Until the person I am fades. The person we were ceases.
To simply. Stop…
Except… Fate, or more likely the Director had different plans… I wake to a small shudder. A mechanical voice speaking.
"Warning. Warning. Ship detected on collision course for vessel. Please Advise."
It repeated. Over and over. Demanding attention. My eyelids fluttered, my body not wanting to move even as my brain started up. I eyed out the port. My eyes staring ruefully.
"I thought the Attack Pod was supposed to be nigh undetectable." I cursed. "Talk about over selling junk." I eyed the ship ahead of me. It looked, familiar somehow.
"Transmission detected. Connect?" I thought maybe a moment… "Connect." Not like I could do more. I saw a connection icon appear, and a voice cut in.
"Hello? Is this Rettas the Super Saiyan?" I nearly barked out a laugh at that. Only stifled by the absurdity of this.
"Hardly a super Saiyan." I bite back. "Mm, well that doesn't matter much. I'm the helmsman of this ship. You likely remember us from before? The pirates that attacked?"
I blinked, confused. "If you're trying to get revenge, I do have to warn you. My ship can provide breathable air and atmosphere for a few feet around it. Enough space for me to decimate your ship."
A second, two… "Wait… Your ship can do that!? how!?" A new voice cuts in, a minor scuffle breaking out.
"Fuck off George! You can ask later!" I could tell that wasn't meant to be broadcast as I heard the people complaining. The pirates complaining… Eh, for some reason I didn't care much even if they were involved, no… it was me who did the most damage. I waited for the arguing to stop, and a low curse as they realized they left the broadcast open.
"Uh, you there still?"
"Yup. You done with your little argument?"
"Ahem, yes and thank you. And, uh, we don't want to fight."
"I find that unlikely. Why else would you take the time to intercept my ship? Or rather, how did you get my transmission information?"
The ship's supposed to have a closed transmission. They sent a direct call. Not the wide area spam the border guard sent.
"Well, one leads to another. See, we want you to be our new captain."
What? I almost voiced that stupidly, but I managed to clamp my mouth shut as I thought. A niggling part of me laughed. What a better fit for one such as I than pirates.
"If possible, could you land on our ship so we can discuss this?"
"If this is a trap, well, just know that even on your ship I'm still a threat."
"Trust me, none of us want to fuck with a girl that can depopulate a planet singlehandedly."
His words made me silent. Memories flooding back. I grimaced, but lickily it was only audio not video.
"Alright, send me the details…" My voice carried none of my worries. And soon enough coordinates were sent, and with a few taps my vessel was heading towards an open hangar bay.
I wasn't sure what to expect when I entered. It being a pirate vessel. What I got was, intriguing to be sure. I wasn't the only one in the hangar, and not just me as in me, but my vessel too. The hangar had some fighters and a few mecha sitting around. I could tell at a glance that they were old, and in some cases, most cases, were Frankenstein nightmares.
Almost like that Johnny Cash song 'One Piece at a Time'… Like they stuck over a dozen different parts on the mecha and fighters, but… there was a certain sense of care and love put into the machines. Not like a haphazard sticking together of parts, but a purposeful intent behind the madness.
I could see what I thought were coolies hanging around the periphery of the hangar. Quiet, watching like hawks, or perhaps like people watching a show as they whispered to each other and talked shit to each other. The sound of the hangar door opening drew my eye. The once, likely silvery metal now rusted and dull door opened with a long low creak.
The group that entered was… odd. Nary a human amongst them. A smattering of aliens of various species and types, so much so that even trying to grasp their individual characteristics was beyond my limited capabilities. One of them stepped forward, arms out to display the intent to do no harm.
"I'm the helmsman of this fine ship." I looked at him as he did the same me. There was something in the air. I wasn't sure what. He wore a uniform of sorts, fitting for a captain. A hat on his head that seemed to twitch, sideburns on his face.
"Rettas." I replied succinctly, not letting anyone out of my sight. I almost wished they would.
"Right, well…" He seemed slightly put off, but a brief cajoling from those behind him had him straight and ready.
"As the helmsman of this ship I'd like to invite you to be our captain." He bowed. The show of respect, odd…
"I don't have any interest in leading pirates." I really didn't.
"Well, you're not exactly leading."
"And that's supposed to be better?"
"Think of it as… a champion? Figurehead? No… Your essentially our face."
That… what?
"I'm not sure I fully understand, but… why would you even want me? didn't I kill your friends or something back there? And your old captain?" I likely did and so much worse.
He waved me off… "Nobody we knew. We even took a vote and if that doesn't make you feel better, well… that's the pirate life!" He said with a smile and a cheerful wave… huh?
"Right, that doesn't explain anything does it? Well, think of every ship as its own nation. Every ship has its own culture and people. Only those in charge typically talk to each other. It's like this because it's common enough for ships to simply vanish or fail out of nowhere while out in space. The best pirate fleets can expect from their fellows is a few lifeboats sent out to get the lucky stragglers.
Which means none of us really care about the other ships. Though there may be a few unhappy people, we did vote on it, and it was overwhelmingly in support of recruiting you. Or at least trying too."
"And what gave you the idea to even try?"
"A mutual friend?" He didn't sound sure… and I didn't really care honestly. No, if anything… I didn't want to believe them. Not one bit. I didn't deserve to be near anyone. I prayed with all my might that this was an elaborate scheme even as I continued the conversation calmly.
"What are the benefits to being captain?" He perked at my words. Hat shifting yet again. "Full access to our ship's facilities. Which means you get food from the mess hall, special food set aside for the captain. Training sessions with our resident trainer. Your own quarters…"
Sounded fine so far… He went on about pay and such… I didn't really care about that though.
"And we can guarantee you that we'll do our best to find you a decent fight."
That last one intrigued me. They would do that? They would feed the beast inside me? even after seeing what it did?
"Can you actually guarantee that?"
"Well… Normally no, but… well…" He was hesitating an awful lot. Surely, it was a lie then.
"Normally we tend to take easy jobs, but it was mentioned that having you around makes a massive difference. A pirate fleet's capabilities are often dictated by the power of the captain. Might makes right after all. And well…"
"Nothing beats a pirate captain that is confirmed to be able to transform into a mountain sized monkey able to blow up a planet?" Someone chipped in.
"Exactly!" The helmsman agreed with a snap of his fingers.
That… Hmm… mmm… I didn't know what to say in response.
"If you want, we can show you the facilities first? Maybe that'll help?" He offered, seeing my hesitance.
"May as well." I replied, my mind still reeling. He turned and I saw him pump his fist as those following him pat him on the back as they excitedly whispered. It was curious. Also, incredibly interesting since it appeared they had some confidence in recruiting me. He proceeded to lead me to each compartment. The hallways were, filthy, but I could see attempts were made to keep it traversable. The ship didn't really smell either. A plus I had to admit.
They showed off the engine, the power reactor. Gave me near endless statistics of the ship. Like the crew capacity, the maximum speed, number of weapons, and the maximum cargo capacity. None of which exactly stuck as it went in one ear and out the other. I mean… some of it sounded impressive, but only because I wasn't able to compare it to something else.
Eventually we made it to the mess hall. A large cafeteria like area. It almost made me think of a school cafeteria. A separate section with notably better chairs was designated for the captain and the various officers. What shocked me was when I got to the cafeteria and saw a familiar face.
"Chef?" It was the chef that fed me when I was fighting in the arena. He gave me a nod. "Dinner will be ready soon enough for ya champion, or well, captain now I suppose."
I was… confused? I wasn't sure how to feel. "Why are you even here?"
"The boss sent me here. Or well, I volunteered. Seeing you eat my food, no… Seeing how much you eat, and all your crazy daily requirements really inspired me as a chef. When I heard you might be joining up with a crew I volunteered. Consider me your personal cook!"
I was, uh, impressed. "Even if their pirates?" "Hardly matters." He said with a casual shrug. I looked at the helmsman who had a grin. I looked back to the cook as he went back to his job. I wanted to argue, to question him, but… I had an image to keep up.
"Honestly… We wouldn't have even considered recruiting you if it weren't for the care package our friend sent. Just knowing how much you eat… well… we couldn't afford that right now."
I nodded to that. Finding myself more and more inclined to join them and also now aware of where that confidence had come from. Slightly more curious about this mutual friend. "Where to next?" I asked, even as I found myself tempted out of my hole I was digging myself into.
"Let's go see the head of security and our crew's trainer." he said, but as we exited the mess hall we came face to face with a maniac.
"Is that her! The alien with the absurd vessel!" He was short, almost a dwarf… Maybe he was a dwarf? Or was he just short? Hard to exactly be appropriate when surrounded by aliens. Was calling him a dwarf a slur? Or not? Did it matter? I thought not.
"George! We talked about this!"
"Yea and you already went through most of my territory! If I really wait for her to show up at the armory, I'll go mad! Your Rettas right?" I nod to that.
"I'm the maintenance guy, also the ship armorer. I'm essentially the quartermaster." He kept adding titles…
"I handle a lot of the background stuff nobody likes to think about. If you need equipment guns, or anything you talk to me." I don't think I had anything… No…
"Actually, I might have a requirement for you, or rather a request. Assuming I do take the position."
"I'll take it! Just find me when you finish up here." And he bolts off… In the previous fight, or when I went monkey… I lost my scouter. Likely blasted to pieces, but I only had one left. And two remotes. But having someone be able to replicate the tech, even if only a little would make a big difference. I looked over and saw the crew looking at me with wide grins. No, it wasn't just that… I felt like I'd lost a piece of my past. A final memory of the original Rettas. I hoped, just maybe, that he could find a functional replacement.
"Well? We moving?" I pivoted to keep myself from dwelling on it.
"Sure thing cap!" I didn't bother to correct him. The more I saw and felt the more I felt this was a good idea. We walked a short distance into a wide area. People were fighting, or well, more like getting thrown around as they fought and grappled. Standing in the center was a man. A human man. The sight shocked me. No, what really shocked me was his aura. My instinct kicking in, like a child smelling cookies in the oven whilst locked away in their room.
Curiosity forced it out, peeking. I didn't hear his name. No, I wouldn't have even remembered it as we stared at each other. He was weak. Mortal. I could easily crush him, but… there was an intensity. A way he moved that made me excited. He was an older man, graying hair, wrinkles on his face. Fit, his hair cut like a soldier.
His presence though… It made me gravitate towards him. Like a rock in the rapids. A flotation device in the middle of the sea.
"You're the one that killed my best student?" He said, evaluating. For some reason I felt my spine straighten under his gaze. Like he was inspecting me, and I wished to be viewed well.
"Mind taking a stance?" He asked, but it wasn't a question. I followed, taking it. "Punch." I did so. He clicked his tongue. "What's your history with fighting." I told him. "Well, your stance is shit. And it looks like you picked up a pit fighters' bad habits. Your hits are too wide, telegraphed like you're performing for an audience. Instead, you should be doing something like this!"
He punches. It was weak. Slow… But… Something, something in that punch sent me into a near frenzy. I felt like I'd jump him any second as I stared at him with a hungry gaze. A gaze he accepted without even flinching. The moment he finished… I couldn't help myself.
"You're going to train me? right? Right?" I was like a hyperactive child. Something about the way he moved sending my mind into disarray. The surety of purpose, perhaps? The confidence. Something I lacked with my own hodgepodge of abilities.
"I'll train you…" He eyes the people behind me, my eyes looking back to glare at them. I look back to see a teasing glint in his eye. "But, only if you agree to be our captain."
I agreed… "I'll do it! I'll be your captain! Who do you want dead? Who we killing? What planet needs scourging!" I couldn't even stop myself as I ranted and raved. I felt like a starved man being offered food. A person in the cold being offered a warm fire. A lost child offered a home. I'd sell my soul to experience even a fraction of what I had seen.
"Woah woah woah! No scourging today, right? We're not even done with the grand tour! Save it for later, okay?" The helmsman pressed until I finally calmed down…
"Ahem, ah, yes. You're right. Just a little excited." Just a little. He carried the scent, no, the feel that the armored man had. A door shuts, another opens, as some say. I follow on the rest of tour. I found myself inspecting everything much more. Absorbing the information even if it didn't click. In the end we were on the bridge. Being shown the captain chair. It wasn't that comfortable.
"Will need a new chair." I muttered.
"We can change that as soon as we get the money." I nodded to that.
"So? Still interested in being our captain?"