Kaoru's eyes flutter open, the light of day filtering through the curtains and casting soft lines across the hotel room. As consciousness gradually returns, a wave of disorientation washes over him, followed swiftly by a flood of memories from the previous night.
He shifts uncomfortably beneath the tangled sheets, the warmth of the room a stark contrast to the chill that settles in the pit of his stomach.
The events of last night replay in his mind like a haunting melody, each note a painful reminder of his loss of control.
It started with a subtle ache, and ignited within him was an unwelcome visitor, one that had remained dormant for years, lurking in the innermost depths of his body.
Kaoru hadn't felt the stirrings of his heat in what felt like an eternity, and its sudden arrival caught him off guard, like a bolt of lightning in the dark of night.
The room itself seems to hold the ghosts of last night's tumultuous emotions. The air is thick with the lingering scent of wildflowers and bitter leaves, his own pheromones mingling with a subtle hint of smoke, a stark reminder of the primal side he fights so hard to suppress.
Kaoru takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself.
His fingers clench around the fabric of the sheets, the texture grounding him momentarily. He feels a twinge of anger mixed with shame, his normally disciplined mind struggling to regain control. The memories are fragmented but intense: the way his body betrayed him, the way he succumbed to the heat that he had kept at bay for so long.
He remembers the way his breath quickened, his heart pounding in his chest as he struggled to contain the primal urges coursing through his veins. Every touch, every caress, sent sparks of pleasure racing through his body, igniting a fire that threatened to consume him whole.
It was like being caught in a storm, the winds of desire tearing away his resolve, piece by piece.
The sensation of his heat reawakening after years of dormancy was terrifying.
But amidst the haze of passion, there was a nagging voice in the back of his mind, a voice that screamed of shame and self-loathing.
He knew he shouldn't be here, shouldn't be giving in to these carnal desires, but the pull was too strong, the need too overwhelming to resist.
And now, as he lies alone in the aftermath of his indiscretion, the weight of his actions bears down on him like a heavy burden.
He's filled with a profound sense of contempt, a bitter taste lingering on his tongue as he grapples with the reality of what happened.
His cheeks burn with embarrassment, a deep flush spreading across his pale skin. His hands tremble as he covers his face, trying to hide from the harsh light of day streaming through the curtains. The golden rays feel accusatory, illuminating every flaw, every moment of weakness. He can't bear to face the truth of his own fragility, the knowledge that he had succumbed so easily to his primal, animalistic instincts.
With a heavy sigh, Kaoru pushes himself upright, his gaze falling on the empty space beside him.
The sheets are rumpled, the evidence of his passion a stark reminder of his weakness.
Each movement feels like wading through quicksand, the weight of his shame bearing down on him like a relentless anchor, a familiar sensation he's grown all too accustomed to over the years.
As he struggles to pull himself out of bed, his limbs are heavy with the burden of regret. A sense of pathetic resignation washes over him, an acknowledgment of his own helplessness against the tides of his desires.
Dressing in the same clothes he wore yesterday feels like donning a shroud of shame, each thread a testimony to the secrets he's desperate to keep hidden. The fabric clings to his skin, a constant reminder of the cycle of self-destructive behaviour he seems unable to break free from.
Standing before the mirror, Kaoru's reflection is a haunting echo of his inner turmoil. His red eyes, usually so fierce and unyielding, now reflect a familiar melancholy. He feels exposed, every layer of his carefully constructed facade peeled away, leaving him vulnerable and raw.
A pang of self-loathing cuts deep within his chest, a feeling he's grown all too familiar with, a constant companion on his journey through life.
But even as he grapples with his own demons, he knows that he can't afford to let them consume him.
Not now, not ever.
He'll keep going, even if he's falling apart at the seams.
The memory of Jae-hwa's sudden departure leaves him feeling disoriented and off-kilter, his mind struggling to make sense of what transpired the night before.
His furrowed brows and creased forehead reflect his inner turmoil as he sifts through the memories, searching for any clue that might explain Jae-Hwa's puzzling behaviour. Each fragment is a shard of glass, sharp and painful, cutting into his consciousness.
The alpha's swift exit defies all logic, especially given the intensity of his heat. Kaoru's mind races, trying to understand why Jae-Hwa would leave him when he was so vulnerable, so defenceless, clawing at his feet and desperate for comfort.
What puzzles him even more than Jae-hwa's abrupt departure is his own inexplicable reaction to the alpha's pheromones. In the past, the mere scent of an alpha would send him recoiling in disgust.
But with Jae-hwa, it was different.
Instead of repulsion, Kaoru had felt...
Safe.
The absence of his usual aversion leaves Kaoru feeling adrift, like a ship lost at sea with no compass to guide him.
Why didn't Jae-hwa stay with him? And why didn't he react negatively to Jae-hwa's pheromones like he always does?
The questions swirl in his mind, each one a wave crashing against the fragile shore of his sanity. As he wrestles with these conflicting emotions, Kaoru can't help but wonder what it all means.
The soft hum of the office fills the air as Kaoru sits at his desk, his brow furrowed in concentration.
He absently taps his pen against the desk, his thoughts drifting back to that morning with Kai.
He and Kai had been sitting at the kitchen table, savouring the simple pleasure of a quick breakfast together.
"So, why didn't you come home last night?" Kai had asked, his tone casual but laced with curiosity.
Kaoru had paused, his heart skipping a beat at the question.
"Oh, I had to work late and ended up staying at a hotel." He had replied, the lie slipping easily from his lips, practised and smooth. The weight of that falsehood pressed down on him, a familiar burden.
Kai's eyebrows pinched together and he frowned.
"Ugh, they're overworking you already? They should at least give you a full-time position if they're gonna do that, greedy bastards! I'll come kill them if you want."
Kaoru had chuckled at his brother's suggestion, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips despite the tightness in his chest.
"Don't worry about it, Kai. I can handle it." He had reassured him, though the weight of his own uncertainty lingered in his mind.
"So, how was your first day at work?" Kaoru inquired, eager to shift the focus and hear about his brother's experiences in the world of entertainment.
Kai shifted uncomfortably in his seat, a nervous chuckle escaping him.
"Oh, you know, just... busy." He replied vaguely, avoiding Kaoru's gaze as he occupied himself with clearing up his plate.
Kaoru had furrowed his brow, perplexity etched across his features.
"Just busy?" He pressed, his tone laced with wariness at his usually talkative brother's reticence.
But Kai merely shrugged, a sheepish grin spreading across his face.
"Eh, it was nothing special, really. Just... work stuff." He mumbled, his response just as ambiguous.
Sighing inwardly, Kaoru had felt confusion mounting with each evasive answer.
It was unlike Kai to be so secretive, especially about something as mundane as his first day at work. But before he could press further, their conversation was interrupted by the ringing of Kaoru's phone, signalling the start of another busy day at the office.
With a resigned sigh, Kaoru turns his attention back to the stack of paperwork on his desk, the morning's conversation with Kai still lingering in the back of his mind like an unresolved puzzle.
As Kaoru sifts through the papers, his mind drifts back to the unexpected turn of events from the previous night.
The memory of his sudden heat, dormant for years, ignites a flicker of concern deep within him. The sensation had been alarming, his body betraying him in a way it hadn't for a long time.
"I should probably go to the doctor." He mumbles to himself.
"I can take you!"
Kaoru jolts, his hand instinctively forming a fist as he whips around. Standing over his shoulder is Jae-Hwa, his sudden appearance catching Kaoru completely off guard. The surprise registers on Kaoru's face, his eyes widening in a mixture of confusion and bewilderment.
"Jae-hwa!" Kaoru manages to stammer. "Don't sneak up on people like that. What are you-"
Jae-Hwa's expression is soft. His presence feels like a gentle but unexpected breeze, unsettling yet not entirely unwelcome.
"I came to apologise for last night." He begins, his voice tinged with sincerity. "I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable."
Kaoru's surprise lingers for a moment as he processes Jae-hwa's unexpected apology. There's a vulnerability in Jae-Hwa's eyes that Kaoru hadn't noticed before, a depth of emotion that seems out of place in the usually composed alpha. Despite himself, Kaoru finds a small spark of appreciation for the earnestness in Jae-Hwa's words.
"I owe you an apology as well." Kaoru says, his voice steady. He stands up and bows deeply. "I deeply regret the inconvenience my situation caused. It was unprofessional, and I assure you it will not happen again. Please accept my heartfelt apologies."
Jae-Hwa's deep blue eyes, reminiscent of a summer sky, meet Kaoru's with an unwavering kindness.
"There's no need for such formalities. We're friends, after all." Jae-hwa replies, his tone gentle but tinged with concern. "So, you're going to the doctor today? Is that why you didn't have any suppressants on you last night?"
Kaoru hesitates, the question hanging in the air like a delicate thread. He feels a flicker of unease, unsure whether to divulge the full truth. The memory of last night is still raw, a jumble of confusion and vulnerability that he isn't ready to share.
After a moment's deliberation, he chooses discretion over disclosure, opting for a simple explanation that skirts around the heart of the matter.
"Yeah, Im going to visit the clinic today." Kaoru replies, his tone carefully neutral, each word a shield against further probing.
"Good idea!" Jae-hwa nods, his expression sympathetic. "And I'll come, too!"
"No." Kaoru deadpans, his refusal immediate and firm.
Throughout the day, Jae-hwa's relentless persistence about the doctor's appointment feels like a constant barrage. Each reminder is like a pebble in his shoe, irritating and unyielding, until Kaoru finds himself on the brink of surrender.
Despite his mounting annoyance, Kaoru can't help but admire Jae-hwa's tenacity. The alpha's unwavering determination is both frustrating and impressive.
It's almost endearing.
"Come on, Kaoru, it'll be quicker if we take my car instead of the subway." Jae-hwa insists, flashing a charming smile that does little to quell Kaoru's irritation. "Just think of it as a little outing."
Kaoru rolls his eyes, resisting the urge to groan aloud. He knows Jae-hwa means well, but his relentless badgering is wearing thin.
Finally, as the day draws to a close and Kaoru's patience wears thin, he begrudgingly relents.
"Alright already! You can take me to the damn doctor."
As they make their way to Jae-Hwa's car after the day's work is done, Kaoru can't shake the feeling of discomfort that settles in the pit of his stomach. The evening sun casts long, golden shadows across the parking lot, painting everything in a warm, honeyed light. Yet, the vehicle before him– a sleek, luxury sedan with a glossy black finish– feels like an alien spacecraft, far removed from the crowd of the subway Kaoru is accustomed to.
The plush seats cradle him in an unfamiliar embrace, and the state-of-the-art dashboard glows softly with a myriad of functions he doesn't recognize. The divide between their worlds feels more like a chasm, leaving Kaoru feeling out of place and acutely self-conscious.
Jae-Hwa, however, seems unfazed by Kaoru's unease. His easy smile never falters as he slides into the driver's seat and starts the engine.
The ride is quiet, save for the soft hum of the engine and the occasional honk of a horn. Jae-hwa doesn't speak, but his presence is comforting in its own way, a reassuring reminder that Kaoru isn't alone.
The alpha's pheromones create a cocoon of serenity that Kaoru finds unexpectedly soothing. It's a scent that feels like a promise of safety, a stark difference from the harsh, aggressive pheromones he has grown to loathe.
As they near their destination, Kaoru's gaze drifts to Jae-hwa's hands, and he can't help but be captivated by their appearance.
They are a study in contrast, strong yet elegant. The muscles flex and strain as he expertly manoeuvres the steering wheel, the tendons beneath his tanned skin shifting with fluid precision.
As Kaoru watches, something stirs deep within him; an undeniable attraction.
When they finally pull up to the clinic, Kaoru's eagerness to escape the confines of the car is palpable. With a quick, mumbled word of thanks, he practically leaps out of the vehicle, his footsteps quickening as he makes a beeline for the clinic entrance. The cool evening air hits him like a splash of water, momentarily grounding him.
Once inside, the sterile scent of antiseptic and the soft hum of fluorescent lights greet him, a stark contrast to the blanket of warmth he's just left. Kaoru turns to Jae-Hwa, his expression firm and resolute.
"You can wait out here." He says, his voice carrying a tone of finality as he gestures towards the lobby.
But Jae-hwa merely smiles. "It's okay, I'll come with you."
Kaoru's eyes flash with frustration, a spark of the old Red-Eyed Demon flaring up.
"Patient confidentiality!" Kaoru snaps, his tone sharp enough to cut through steel. "Now sit!"
Jae-Hwa whines softly, a sound almost too playful for the serious atmosphere, but he sees the determination in Kaoru's eyes and knows better than to push further. With a resigned sigh, he lowers himself onto one of the stiff lobby chairs, his tall frame looking slightly awkward in the small space.
Kaoru watches him for a moment, a mix of exasperation and something softer flickering across his features. Then, with a curt nod, he turns and heads towards the consultation room, each step a deliberate act of regaining control.
The door closes behind him with a quiet click, cutting off the view of Jae-Hwa's reassuring presence.
In the doctor's office, Kaoru's words spill out in a torrent, laced with embarrassment and uncertainty.
"I had my heat last night." He explains. "It's been years since I last had it."
"And is the alpha waiting outside your mate?" The doctor asks, her tone a delicate blend of professional curiosity and empathy.
"No, he's not!" Kaoru blurts out, the words escaping with a force that surprises even him.
The doctor raises an eyebrow, her expression thoughtful.
"You might want to rethink that, then." She suggests, her words carrying a weight that sends a stone of dread into the pit of Kaoru's stomach. "Your pheromones must be a perfect match- in storybooks, they'd call it fate, but it's just science. The more you're with him and his pheromones, the more unstable your heats will become. I'll prescribe you a stronger suppressant than the one you were on before. You're a dominant omega, so protection might not be enough. Would you like me to prescribe a birth control?"
The doctor's words strike Kaoru like a bolt of lightning, igniting a storm within him. As her diagnosis sinks in, his face flushes crimson with embarrassment and anger, his fists clenching at his sides in frustration.
Kaoru's jaw tightens, his breath coming in short, sharp bursts as he struggles to contain the fury raging within him.
"No, thank you." He manages to choke out, his voice strained and brittle as he rises abruptly from his seat.
He hurries out of the doctor's office, his steps swift and purposeful. The corridor outside seems to stretch endlessly.
As he emerges, Jae-Hwa stands up, his dark blue eyes filled with concern.
Kaoru brushes past him, his thoughts a chaotic swirl.
Fate?
Yeah, right.
Fate's never done me any favours.