Character : Lilyanna Valkaria, Disappointment
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When I saw my entrance exam scores, I knew immediately that I got into class A by pure luck.
I did get 'S' score on three exams, but it was my knowledge exam that really got me into class A. Without the academic knowledge, I know very well what my limits are and what I'm only capable of.
And now more than ever… my inability to follow along has finally revealed itself.
"Woah! Your hair turned red for a second!" Jonah pointed at Prince Rejulus's hair, and the prince touched his hair with curiosity.
"R-Really!? I mean, it's about damn time!" The prince laughed loudly, and everyone else was also happy for him.
It is currently the seventh day ever since we started the special training that Nathan and the vice headmaster got us to do. After only a few days of training, the results were able to appear one by one.
The first to show results was Eric Axwell. That guy has always been crazy talented, and everyone turned crazy when a portion of his hair above his ears turned white-gray. We all praised him for being a genius, but later on Nathan revealed that Eric had already started training a day before we all did.
Which… is still fast, but a little less amazing now that we know.
Then, more and more of my classmates began to show their results. After four days, Jonah's hair turned yellow at the back hair. Other than him, his cousin, Regie, also achieved the temporary change. Marvolo also got a portion of his hair turning gray, just like Eric.
Of course, all of these changes were temporary, and they usually disappear after only a few seconds. But, they are still progressing, nonetheless.
And finally, after seven whole days, the crown prince of Fiordall, Rejulus, has shown his results. His front bangs turned red, which was more or less similar to Nathan's. Though it was only for a moment, that is still a sign that he is progressing with the training. All he has to do is keep on going until he can deliberately turn the phase on and off, like what Nathan has told us.
Now, everyone else has shown their progress.
Everyone… but me.
"It's okay, Lily! You got this. It's only a matter of time, after all!" Jonah encouraged me, and I thanked him quite dearly since he knew I was thinking about it.
"Don't overly push yourself. It will come anyway." Even my water origin rival, Clade, told me that the signs will eventually appear.
Everyone has encouraged me at some point. But, I have yet to hear from him.
Nathan has been quite busy with his own problems. He was there for the first three days of the training, but he never came to class anymore since then. From what I've heard, he is finding out more about the secrets behind origins, and he wants to find out other methods that can make us stronger.
He is doing his very best, and he has achieved everything all by himself. This method, the mastery phase, was something only elites among elites can ever truly master. And yet, the vice headmaster told us Nathan got it in just a month without anyone teaching him.
He is just incredible. Too incredible.
Everyone else too, they are all very good and talented people.
And yet, I'm just a fraud existing amongst them.
"You… don't think you can do it?" The vice headmaster repeated my words after I told her, and I nodded with sadness.
After ten days, there has been no progress whatsoever. Everyone else has already shown promising results. Eric Axwell, the guy who started a day earlier than everyone else, has already fully mastered it and can turn it on and off by choice.
And yet, my hair has not changed colors yet.
"I don't think… I am cut out to do such things." I told the vice headmaster, and she leaned deeper into her chair as he thought deeply about this.
"Have you told Nathan?"
"N-No… I couldn't find him, these days."
"Well, that kid has indeed been busy... Busier than me, in fact." The vice headmaster chuckled after remembering, and she turned her smile back to me. "So, that's it? You're just giving up?"
"Yes, ma'am. I don't think I have the capabilities to do it." I told her about how I feel about all of these, and she looked like she respected my opinion.
"Hmm. Amazing. In that case, I'll be moving you to class B. I hope you don't mind that, because class A is the only one receiving special treatment." The vice headmaster explained to me, and I bowed a little at her.
"It was indeed what I wanted."
The vice headmaster nodded at me one last time, and she opened a letter from under her desk. She read the letter for a while before finally turning back to me.
"Come to think of it… Lily, you're the princess of the water empire, right?" She suddenly said, and I was quite surprised that she didn't even remember it.
"Y-Yes, I am."
"Well, I heard that there will be a guest coming today from the water empire. I think you might want to go and greet them." The vice headmaster said, and I turned curious instantly.
"A guest? Who is it?"
"They said it's an envoy, wanting to check out on how you're doing. If you ask me, it sounds like the emperor and empress are curious about how you're doing." She explained her theory, and I just smiled softly hearing that.
Right… It's been a while since I've sent a letter to my parents.
"In that case, I'll go greet them later, at noon." I said as a reply, and she put the letter back under the desk.
"All right. You may leave."
Afterwards, I left her office. During my way back to the dorm room, I was pretty silent and unmotivated. My energy to stay sane is no longer, and it truly feels like everything around me has crumbled.
Mom and Dad… they must be wondering how I'm doing nowadays. Just how can I tell them that I've fallen off from class A?
I know they're going to be disappointed. But, the worst part is still dealing with my sister.
I hope my sister finds out about my situation as late as possible. Because the moment she knows, my life as I know it will change.
I ended up not attending class B just yet, because I wanted to prepare myself for the guests coming at noon. I skipped class without anyone knowing and just laid down in my bed. Thinking deeply about my situation and the world around me.
I made the right choice. I do not fit in with them at all. I'm just not the same as them. I'm not talented.
"Oh. You're here." The dorm room door was opened, and I don't have to look to know who it was.
"Welcome back. No training today?" I asked Nyssa as she entered the dorm, and she shook her head while taking off her shoes.
"Teacher said she's going to be busy today. I guess I'll be joining you guys, instead." Nyssa said not knowing my situation, and I realized that I have no choice but to let her know my decision.
I got up from my bed and sat cross-legged, and I turned my serious face to Nyssa.
"Nyssa." I called her name, and she turned her blank curious stare at me.
"Hmm?" Nyssa has turned her eyes at me, and now that we're both staring at each other, I began to wonder if I should say anything.
In the first place... There's no reason for me to say anything.
After all, even if I were to leave class A, nobody is going to be affected. That's just how little my presence was in the classroom.
Even if Nyssa continued without me... It's not like she's going to suffer. If anything, I might just hold her back.
Her talent is worlds beyond me. My existence will just hinder her progress.
"Never mind! It's just a funny thought in my head." I said while rubbing my hair, and Nyssa only blinked her eyes once.
"You... Are you feeling left out?" Nyssa suddenly said aloud, and I was really shocked.
"W-What are you talking about? Left out from what?" I asked while acting dumb, but it seems like Nyssa has already caught on.
"I may not exist during class since I train differently. But, I still hear a thing or two. Your training still hasn't shown any progress, right?" Nyssa managed to guess exactly what was going on, and I am a bit terrified at how much she knows despite not being in class.
For the entire ten days, Nyssa has been practicing separately. She trained privately with the vice headmaster at a different place. She shouldn't have known that my progress is slower than everybody else.
I've successfully hid that fact from her for over ten days now. And yet, here she is saying it as if she has known for a while.
And now, she has completely busted me. What should I do...?