RACHEL'S POV
The room was suffocating, the flashing lights of the cameras blinded my eyes, but through it all, I kept my smile in place.
My mother's words sliced into me, leaving bleeding cuts behind, but I refused to let her see how deep they cut.
The people around might not be able to see these cuts, but I knew they were there.
"Do you have any idea how embarrassing that was?" She hissed. "The one time, I let you go somewhere, you ruin it all by being a clumsy fool." My smile was trembling, I was barely keeping it together.
"You couldn't let your sister be happy for once, you had to make yourself the centre of attention.
Tonight was special for her, it was her big night, and you go and pull this stunt." Her face twisted on the word stunt, and she spat it like it had personally offended her.
Her hands were gesturing now. I flinched when one came too close to my face, I knew there was no way she'd hit me in public, but instinct still took over.
I shrunk into myself under the weight of her words. All of a sudden, I was that little girl once again, begging her mother to let her out of the closet.
Crying because of how dark and cold it was, her little stomach eating itself. Begging to be let out, saying she'd never do it again.
I was that girl, and that girl was me. I'd never grown out of her, no matter how much I lied to myself.
I was going to do the same thing she'd always done, I'd beg for forgiveness and swear to never do it again. I should have known better, I had no idea what had come over me and made me trip Emilia. Maybe I could have avoided all of this if I'd simply controlled myself.
My smile was completely gone now, I was tired of pretending. I tried to disconnect from what was happening, but her words kept dragging me back to the present.
"You've always been my worst mistake, my biggest regret, my biggest disappointment." She laughed self-deprecatingly.
"I should've gotten rid of you long ago, it was a mistake to you'd ever be worth anything."
I stared at the floor and blinked numerous times to prevent the tears in my eyes from falling.
It's not like the words were anything new, I'd heard them thousands of times, yet they still made me hurt.
"You will learn to stay in your place, Rachel, I do not care how long it takes to teach you that."
I looked around the room, hoping, waiting for someone to notice what was going on, I was disappointed as always.
They all pretended like they couldn't see what was happening. They turned their faces away and told themselves their eyes were deceiving them.
I stared at my father, he was the only one who could help me now. But he was just like the others, he shook his head and turned away. I was on my own.
Emilia's laugh spread through the room, light and clear. My father was watching her now and smiling. She was surrounded by gushing admirers, her dress might have been ruined, but her night was still going perfect, I was glad for that at least.
"Stop looking at her," my mother snapped, pulling my attention away from her. Her nails dug into my arm, she leaned closer, her voice dropped to a venomous whisper.
"You'll never be her, you know. No matter how hard you try, you'll never be as good, you will never shine as bright. You're nothing but her shadow."
The room felt smaller with every second. My mother's grip loosened, but her words still clung to me, like a suffocating second skin.
I nodded along to what she said, desperate to get this night over and be back in my mind. I wondered if I'd stayed with Jacob tonight, would I feel so alone right now.
Even his anger would have been easier to handle than this suffocating room.
She let go of my arm and pushed me aside. My legs felt like jelly as I tried to stable myself. My hand rested in the back of a chair next to me, and I sank to the floor.
Tears filled my eyes now that she was gone. Was she right? Was I really nothing but Emilia's shadow?
My other hand rested on my chest, as my breaths picked up. But before I could completely lose myself, I felt a pair of eyes on me, a presence that made me pause.
A pair of eyes watched me from across the room, their expression unreadable.
Adrian. How long had he been there? How much had he seen? Did he know what had happened?
It felt like he could see through me, like he could see the cuts that bled, the girl I was trying to hide.
My heart raced, it felt like the air in the room was reducing with every passing second. I couldn't move, it was like I was pinned under the weight of his gaze.
Adrian was still watching me, his posture gave off relaxed, but I could see how tense he was even from here.
His eyes were dark, there was something in them — curiosity, maybe? Concern? I couldn't tell, but whatever it was, it cut me to the bone and left me feeling exposed.
I wanted to look away, to disappear. But there was something in the way he stared at me that kept me rooted to the spot.
It wasn't pity, it wasn't judgement, it wasn't pity. I had no idea what it was, but I hated the way it made me feel. It was time to leave.
I headed back to my seat, weaving through the crowd, and grabbed my things where I'd left them.
I turned to leave, but he was there standing behind me. I stepped back, unnerved by how close he was, but he didn't stop moving.
He kept towards me, and you took a step back with everyone he took forward.
Everyone was clearing out of the room now, heading out to the after party. Soon, we'd be the only ones left here. I wanted to leave before that happened.
I took a deep breath and steadied myself for what I was about to do. Holding tight onto my bag, I shoved him aside, but he didn't even move an inch.
"How much longer are you going to let her treat you like that?" He asked. His hands slid into his pockets, I took another step back in shock.
"I have no idea what you're talking about." I muttered, looking everywhere but him.
He quirted an eyebrow, staring me down.
"I… I have to go." I shook my head, I had to get out of here. I shoved him aside, I knew it wouldn't do anything, but I still had to try.
He moved back, I knew he only did it out of courtesy, but I wasn't going to take any chances and stick around.
Hurrying out of there with my head turned to the ground, I realized, for the first time in years, I'd felt seen.
Not as Emilia's useless sister or my mother's biggest regret. To him, I was just me, and that realization scared me more than anything.