Lilo's bed had never felt more comfortable. Chalant was already sound asleep by the time Lilo made it back, and Soda's voice remained quite in Lilo's mind.
His tense body relaxed as he sunk into his silk sheets and a gentle breeze ruffled the curtains of his large window that overlooked the starlit sky.
The night was clam but his thoughts still raced as he recollected all the bizzare past events in his last few days.
His thoughts were always running wild and it was in the verge of overheating; not only from the mysterious night at the forbidden temple, from the deadly spars he had been a part of, or the hot steamy night in the Craver's bathhouse , but also just from the burden of wanting to return home.
He was uncertain of the potential of it really being an obtainable goal.
Initially he had a deep and sure feeling about it all being solved if only he reached the Timbers…
But the world seemed so vast and the systems in place seemed like an obstacle that was impossible to emerge triumphant from… at least not for awhile.
'Damn it all. Why can't I just sneak out and storm my way into the cursed tree? I'm not even sure if that really is where my solution to returning home is… what if I'm really dead and there is no way of returning? What if I'm stuck here and this is my new reality?'
These thoughts weighed heavy on Lilo's mind, and it pushed him to the edge of despair.
The corners of his mental fortitude grew dreary and depression seeped into his heart.
It all felt hopeless and he felt so small in this unforgiving world.
In the past, it all felt obtainable. His father, although harsh with his methods of training, was a constant support system that guided his footsteps towards success.
Lilo was also self motivated and incredibly driven to dedicate his life to the soul purpose of improving on his combat ability.
He had full control over his own destiny and it fueled all of his efforts that he inserted into the world.
But here in this cursed world, there were beats and beings far out of Lilo's reach of power.
There were too many unknown factors and mysterious that prevented him from grasping the concepts of this world and making them bend to his will as he had in his past life.
Over and over again he was relentlessly beaten; forced to pick himself back up from his extreme unluck and countless harrowing experiences.
Now, with that alluring pink Craver's advice, he had yet another deadly day to face tomorrow.
When would it end? When will he finally feel like he was making progress to escaping this mysterious world and returning to the comforts of his broken past life that he still had aspirations for?
Eros would've known what to do. He was always the clever one. His best friend always knew how to turn a sour situation into something useful.
They had grown up together in the same gym, chasing the same gym, and advancing in their career's in at the same pace.
While Lilo was a master in striking, Eros was a lethal technician as a grappler.
They were the perfect pair to be training partners. As iron sharpens iron, their rivalry blossomed and forged two indominable forces within the cage of fighters.
Eros was a lighter fighter by 10kg(22lbs), and having them both be in differing weight classes made for a great case to avoid fighting each other ever.
Even though they were rivals, they were extremely close. When Lilo struggled to cut weight, Eros was there to encourage him.
When Eros suffered injures and had to sit out of competition, Lilo was their to comfort him.
No one else knew the pain each other had to endure more than these two men.
Their souls burned brighter when in close proximity and it ignited an incinerating heat that blasted any tribulations thrown their way.
They were an unstoppable duo, and life felt more complete with each other's company.
Eros was there for Lilo's wedding. Lilo was there for the birth of Eros's daughter. They shared every moment together and were inseparable soul brothers.
Until one wedge in their life tore everything apart.
You see, although Lilo's career and his friendship was soaring in success, his marriage was struggling big time.
Candy, his wife, was suffering from the burden of having to pick up the broken pieces of her husband after each fight.
Although Lilo won every fight in devastating fashion and made it look easy on tv; he was battling his own demons in the gym, every day that he trained was an ounce of himself that he sacrificed.
His body endured brutal torture and his mental fortitude suffered from the repetition of ongoing stress he put on himself in order to remain an undefeated champion.
As his fame grew, so did the expectations. He needed to be more in shape. He needed to finish his opponents in more violent fashion. He needed to be more outspoken and charismatic.
All of this mental manipulation was perpetually growing more and more burdensome.
Each fight that he signed up for meant more of this to follow; and more of his shattered mental health that his wife had to attempt to mend back together.
Lilo assumed the gym was his therapy but every night that he plunged into the ice bath - allowing his aching muscles to thaw out - he felt the edges of his sanity slip away.
Eros was an unwavering friend, but even he was unaware of the inner workings of Lilo's mental suffering. He kept his pain close to his chest and yet one soul still found a way to find his hidden turmoil.
Candy could feel and hear the brokenness in his voice when he spoke. He didn't have to tell her what he was going through.
The subtle tells of his demeanor shifting within his day to day life was enough for her to know the depth of his agony.
The way he would knead his sore palms during meals from the hand wraps that cut circulation from clenching too long.
The expression on his face as he laced his shoes before his runs in the morning. How his eyes sunk into his cheek bones as he kissed her goodnight.
He was slowly chipping away at his soul, leaving a brittle core and on the verge of shattering into dust.
Candy knew he didn't want to acknowledge it, so she never mentioned it.
She only tried desperately to mend him indirectly. In any way she could she would comfort him and lift up his spirits.
But it was a bottomless pit, and her efforts eventually drained her own soul's well.
His sorrow turned into her own, and she would eat to escape it. Sweets were the one soothing thing that brought comfort into her hurt soul.
Donuts. Ice cream. Crepes. Any and all sweet treats were her weakness.
She would eat it in hiding, tucked away in a pantry corner late at night; making sure to keep Lilo away from the temptations of falling from his diet to stay in shape for his fights.
But it didn't take long for him to notice her gains. At first he felt betrayed. He liked sweets too.
Knowing she ate them in secret was a bit hurtful but he understood that they lived different lives and had different goals.
Outside of that it didn't bother him too much. But then... it kept getting worse.
As his own anguish from fighting grew, so did the numbers on the scale for Candy.
She was extremely self aware but... no matter what attempts she did to stop, she continued to enjoy her snacks and remained gaining insane amounts of weight.
Lilo did not mind at first. He had only ever loved Candy and have always been faithful to her.
Nothing was going to deter that... until it reached an amount that was... repulsive even for Lilo.
She was unable to walk without assistance and the doctors gave heavy precaution to her health being in jeopardy.
In just a few months, her image changed drastically and it came as a shock to Lilo.
He didn't understand how she would do that to herself and allow this to happen.
They would get into heated arguments often throughout this whole process but Candy refused to bring out the real reason she was suffering.
She didn't want to hurt Lilo and she knew he didn't want to open up about his inner demons.
It wasn't until after Lilo cheated on her that he fully knew the cycle of pain he had caused and the true dilemma behind why this was all an origin of his own insecurities.
A broken chuckle followed a tear that trickled down Lilo's cheek as he laid in bed, reminiscing his twisted life that he longed to go back and fix.
'It's always at night when I just have to remember this fuck shit.'
He was scared. Terrified that he won't be able to see them again. Afraid that he wouldn't be able to right his wrongs and make it up to those he hurt.
'Perhaps this new world I'm in is where everyone who dies in my world reincarnated into... maybe I'll get to meet them here. No. I want to go back. I need to. No matter what it takes, I will see you again Candy... Eros... Mom...'
He repeated their names in his head until he drifted into sleep, tears soaking his pillow and nervous sweats staining his sheets.