Luis nodded to us in greeting as we passed while commanding the workers clearing and replacing the ruined furniture in our living room. Jude was sitting at the breakfast table when we entered the kitchen, working on his laptop as he ate. I wordlessly sat across from him and Rick took the seat beside mine.
"Coffee?" Rick asked.
I hummed in affirmation, letting him fill a cup for me. He took a croissant from the platter on the table and spread butter on it before offering it to me. I accepted it, aveting my gaze from Jude who was watching us with a look of scorn. Rick just carried on, fixing himself a plate and offering me a bite in between eating.
"If I kill him, will you forgive me?" Jude suddenly uttered.
"Never," I answered before taking a sip of coffee. "Where's Stella?"
"Upstairs. Sleeping."
I eyed him for a moment, noting the obvious ease he was carrying himself with. It was so unnatural, seeing him not practically suffocating under his own skin. To think that baby faced little thing was capable of bringing this freak to submission so completely, I was genuinely impressed.
"You didn't fuck the poor thing into a coma, did you?"
He stiffened, gifting me with an almighty glare while Rick snorted into his coffee cup. I casually handed him a napkin.
"Can you not be so crass?" Jude snapped irately.
I shrugged, taking a bite of my croissant and chasing it with coffee. "She's technically my dependent. I'm obliged to be apprised regarding her health, including post-coital injuries."
"What kind of brute do you take me for?"
"Brother, you are half of me and I you," I said, parting my lips to let Rick feed me omelette. "Where do you think I got my aggression from?"
"I hardly recall teaching you such a thing– could you please stop speaking with your mouth full?" he uttered in disapproval.
I chewed and swallowed before replying, "I'm a visual learner." I tapped at the corner of my eye while taking another bite of croissant. "So, shall I prepare a bed in the ICU or perhaps a grave for your precious Stella?"
Rick was groaning, clutching his side as he snickered. Jude glared at me again.
"She's fine, and I can take care of her when she's with me, so just keep watch from outside."
I nodded. "And how long will you be keeping her with you?"
"For as long as she wishes to remain with me," he replied almost defensively.
"You're making it real hard to do my job, you know," I said, sighing.
"You started it." He cast a pointed glance at Rick. "If you intend to keep yours, then I will keep mine."
"He got you there, gorgeous," Rick quipped, feeding me a slice of bacon.
I chewed quietly, not having the words to rebutt either of them. I decided to just drink my coffee instead.
"By the way, I have to go to London for business in a few days," Jude went on to say. "The firm is in the final stages of the expansion. It will take a week, two at most. Do you mind if I stay at East Wind Palace?"
My brows furrowed. "Isn't it a museum now or something?"
"Yes, but the apartments in the north wing are restricted and can only be used under your approval."
"I still own it? I thought Teri sold it a few years ago."
"You own a palace?" Rick intejected, sounding incredulous. "Like, literally?"
"Well, it's not really a palace and it shouldn't be mine." I glared at Jude. "At least that's what I told my estate manager when I inherited her and the stupid thing."
"The buyer was planning on renovating it and Gramps' will clearly stated that the palace must remain as is, otherwise it can't be sold," Jude said. "Teresa decided to open the west and south wings along with the grounds for tourists and events to generate income for upkeep."
"Huh. Smart," I muttered. "Teri didn't tell me that."
"Because you've been hiding from her since she came under your employ and every time she tries to meet with you, you run off and I'm forced to take on your responsibilities." He let out a long suffering sigh. "Do you at least read any of the documents I give you?"
"No, I gave you carte blanche so I don't have to bother with any of that crap."
He sighed again. "I don't even want to talk about how ridiculous you are," he said, pressing his temples. "So may I?"
"May you what?"
"Stay at the palace for a few days."
I wrinkled my nose. "Why? The place doesn't even have WI-FI and I'm pretty sure it's haunted. I stay at your house whenever I go to London."
"I'm taking Stella with me," he said hesitantly, averting his gaze. "She's never been to London so I want her to enjoy herself while I'm working. She likes antiques and I thought she would love the palace."
I took a second to appreciate this moment, putting a hand over my mouth to keep myself from bursting with laughter.
"Ah, how precious," I said, pressing my palm to my chest. "You really are a boy after all. I could cry right now."
Rick started laughing, nearly choking on his food.
"You know what? Never mind. It was a stupid idea," Jude said, hiding his blushing face behind his laptop screen.
I laughed, slapping the table. "You can stay at the palace for as long as you want, brother. Just make sure you don't walk around in your tighty whiteys. Can't have you scaring off the tourists."
"Please stop," Rick said as he snickered, sounding in pain.
Jude shook his head, visibly irritated. "Thank you. I already called the chief curator to make preparations for our arrival."
I snorted. "Why did you even bother me then?"
He gave me a flat look. "It's called manners, Gel."
"I never ask you for permission to stay at your houses."
"Exactly. You just show up and wreck the place without consideration," he muttered grimly. "I can't count how many of my people have quit after meeting you."
"Hey, that says more about you than me. You raised me, remember?"
He rolled his eyes. "Why do you always use that as an excuse for everything?"
"Cuz it pisses you off," I said, snickering.
He gave me yet another premium Jude Lastor death glare. I grinned.
"I like this." I gestured at us with a finger. "We never talk like this. We should do it more."
His face softened. "Yes, we should."
We shared a smile and the brief moment of vulnerability instantly unsettled the both of us. I tended to my croissant while Jude returned his attention onto his work.
"On another note–" he began, clearing his throat. "–I'll be bringing Stella with me for tonight's event."
I paused, leaving my mouth open as Rick was feeding me another piece of omelette. Jude glanced at me, wrinkling his nose with a look of disgust.
"Eat properly," he said in annoyance.
I shut my mouth, chewing while in thought. "You cannot," I said after swallowing.
"I can," he countered, continuing to keep his attention on the screen of his laptop. "I shouldn't, but I can."
I held up a hand when Rick tried to feed me again, leaning forward and pushing Jude's laptop close.
"You begged me to have her," I reminded him. "You got on your fucking knees and begged me. I have done everything in my power to give you her. You cannot throw her at the mercy of the very things I've been shielding her from and expect her to survive unscathed, even with me as her protector."
"I agree," he conceded.
"Then–"
"It's not my will, but hers," he cut in.
I took a moment of pause, staring at him. He was tapping his finger on his plate. The neatly sectioned portions of food had been left untouched.
"She's leaving you, huh?" I deduced, scoffing. "I knew this would happen."
He stilled, his hand curling into a fist. "Not if I give her this."
I let out a heavy sigh, rubbing at my forehead. "Must it be this event?"
"Yes. If I am to acknowledge her as mine, it is only right to do so somewhere that matters."
"You say that because you're not the one who has to make it happen," I said in frustration, pressing my fingers against my temples. "Fuck. Alright." I let out a breath, clasping my hands together. "You will follow the path I'll be laying for you. Both of you. Move a step out of place and I'm done with this nonsense."
He nodded stiffly. "Thank you."
"Fuck your thanks," I spat back, tossing the remaining half of my croissant in mouth and chewing openly without care. "You better marry this girl for all the trouble you're putting me through for her."
He pursed his lips, averting his gaze. "That's up to her."
"I was kidding." I stared at him intently, swallowing. "Don't tell me. You've proposed, haven't you?"
"No," he replied curtly, opening his laptop. "Not yet."
I glanced at Rick, passing him a look of incredulity that he returned.
"Not a word," Jude bit out, glaring at us. "I mean it."
"You can't–"
"Little Angel," he cut in sharply.
I let out a harsh breath. "Now is not the time to–"
"Enough."
I slammed a fist on the table. Rick quickly took my hand, forcing his fingers through mine. I kept my gaze on my brother, glaring right back at him.
"For what it's worth, I'm happy for you, man," Rick offered sincerely. "Congrats in advance."
"Sweetheart, I adore you," I said while continuing to glare at my brother. "But I need you to shut up for a sec."
"Okay, but don't go crazy," he relented with a sigh.
I scoffed. "He's the one who's out of his mind!"
"For wanting to marry the woman I love?" Jude countered.
I was going to beat the shit out of this fool.
As if Rick knew, he wrapped an arm around me, keeping our hands twined and effectively holding me captive. I settled with kicking Jude under the table, purposely hitting him on his right knee that he'd injured during a football game in high school.
He let out a strained groan, reaching across the table and flicking my forehead. I lunged at him, but before I could break the fool's stupid face, Rick dragged me back, holding me by the throat.
"I can't fuck the crazy out of you when you're too sore," he murmured softly with his lips pressed to my ear. "Calm down."
I let out a series of breaths, forcibly quelling the destructive urge brimming inside me. Rick loosened his hold on me, rubbing his fingers against the skin of my neck and kissing my ear repeatedly. I gradually calmed down.
"You cannot marry her," I said in a leveled voice.
"Your place is beside me, not above me," Jude replied with indifference. "You have neither the right or authority to decide for me. No one does."
"How are you even planning on gaining the family's approval, huh?" I asked, genuinely wondering. "I may hold the third seat, but apart from being entitled to a vote, I cannot interfere with any of the council's rulings in my current diminished capacity. You'll have to do this on your own."
"I know. Just focus on preparing for tonight."
I stared at him for a moment, sensing that he was keeping something from me. "You can't go to war, Jude."
He sighed, shaking his head. "It's insulting that you keep presuming there are things I cannot do, little Angel."
"My God, you are!"
"Don't be a hypocrite," he muttered, rolling his eyes. "You've instigated wars for less."
"Yes, irrelevant campaigns done out of spite and boredom," I readily conceded. "For something as significant as your marriage, the family will not spare any expense."
"Nor will I."
"This isn't just going to be another business deal, Jude," I reasoned. "There will be no shaking of hands. It won't be done in a conference room with everyone sitting properly and acting politely."
"I'm aware how things are done in this family," he said dismissively, keeping his eyes glued to the screen of his laptop.
"You're aware, but you've never taken part. You never had to. Everyone simply bowed their heads while you made your way to your rightful place. Not this time."
I pulled myself free from Rick's hold and leaned forward, reaching across the table to grasp Jude's hand.
"I live for you. You're my other half. I will always stand with you, but you can't pursue this fight." I squeezed his hand. "I can help you stake your claim, but no more than that. They won't allow it. At least not right now."
He was about to respond when a door opening and closing upstairs resounded, followed by the echoing of footsteps on the stairs.
"He-Hello. Where's… Jude?" Stella was saying hesitantly.
Jude sent me a sharp glare before rising to his feet and heading out of the kitchen. Rick placed a hand on my thigh, squeezing lightly as he offered me a tentative smile.
"Open up," he murmured, holding up his fork to my lips.
Grudgingly, I opened my mouth and let him feed me. He kissed the side of my head, rubbing my thigh in a soothing gesture. The sudden silence in the kitchen was disrupted by the mechanical whirring of the surveillance camera in the corner of the ceiling, shifting its position as Stella and Jude entered.
"Go-Good morning," she mumbled in greeting.
"Morning," Rick greeted back, squeezing my thigh when I didn't respond.
"Morning," I muttered grudgingly.
"Come eat, chérie," Jude said, leading her to the seat next to his.
The sound of the camera continued to buzz incessantly as we carried on with our meal.
"Will you do something about this, or shall I?" Jude said once we had cleared our plates and were merely nursing our coffees.
I sighed, shifting to rest my chin on Rick's shoulder. He slid an arm around me, slipping his hand under my shirt and stroking the skin of my back.
"Reacting openly will only aggravate the situation," I said in thought, staring at Rick. "Which is probably the objective of putting us through this situation, to justify further interference."
"And last night does not constitute as a reaction?"
I cracked a smile. "To Ben, not Father. The differing weight of either will determine the severity of consequence, and Ben knows, regardless of the circumstances, that I do not tolerate impositions. I'm sure he made the effort of making Father aware of this, it would have been incompetent of him not to, so whatever consequence I face will be negligible." I glanced at him from the corner of my eye. "Father has no choice but to ignore it, or he will be turning away from the opportunity to use something more significant than the demise of two nameless grunts. We have reached an impasse, and I insist we keep it that way."
"It is not in my nature to be passive," Jude said quietly. "Nor is it yours."
"I'm being cautious. This is not a war that we can instigate without thorough preparation. We have too much to lose."
"Then make preparations."
I chuckled weakly, resting the side of my head on Rick's shoulder. "I have been, but I'm not confident that I'll be able to achieve the same results as I had in my previous endeavors."
"You were fighting alone all those times," he replied. "I'll be standing with you this time."
"Then answer this, how do I compare to the monster who consequered half the family in just a year and left the other half cowering behind their seats all these years?"
He didn't respond, but I knew the answer already. We both did.
Five years. It had been five years since the council placed a sanction on my authority as the third seat, a consequence for nearly beating an uncle of ours to death during a meeting while I was at the throes of what could only be described as a destructive mental breakdown after Gramps' death.
For the crime of harming a kin, execution was the irrefutable sentence. I had welcomed it, suggested it even. As such, Jude, with the support my aide, Arthur Hagen, threatened to declare total war.
The last time a total war was institgated, it resulted in the deaths of thirty-nine members of the family, spanning all the branches and included half a dozen council members, and hundreds more of collateral damage both in resources and lives. After months at war, Caleb Lastor, the war monger, was eventually executed at the hands of his own father. The law forbidding the harming and threatening of the life of a kin was then imposed by my great-grandfather, Timothy.
My punishment had been debated at length. While they could not even hope to touch me without being willing to shed their own blood, I couldn't not face any consequence either. And so I was forbidden from being involved in any council matters and forced to delegate the authority of my seat to my aide, who has been serving as my proxy in the council for the past five years.
I had not been in the state of mind to protest the sanction, nor possessed the determination to make any attempts to regain my full authority. The chains they essentially shackled upon me had only tightened as time went on, keeping me from moving too much or going too far against their will. But the fact remained, I was simply allowing it.
I had no doubt they had been preparing for my freedom, while I was simply rotting away in anticipation of my self-inflicted demise. But even at my worst, there was no one beneath me who could rival me. I knew this for a fact, as did they. It would be easy, tearing their filthy hands off me, but only if I was capable of becoming the same monster as I once had been.
"I was able to achieve so much because I was alone and had nothing to lose," I mumbled, tangling my feet with Rick's under the table. "Father will not stop until he feels satisfied, and that can only be with our submission. This–" I gestured at Rick and Stella. "– has offended him not as our father, but as our master. If we face against him, it would be with the full force of the family and there will be no mercy. Everything and everyone in our lives will face ruin, and perharps ourselves as well. I can guarantee their protection, but not ours. At least not both of us."
I closed my eyes, envisioning all the possible outcomes and the events that would lead to them if we faced our father's wrath.
"Father loathes war and deems them to be beneath him. Any opinion that differs to his is simply wrong and when he desires something, he simply owns it. A fight is never necessary because, to him, everything has a price. This situation is an opportunity he is offering us to pay the cost of our offense." I opened my eyes, looking back at Jude "It is simply foolish to fight a war with so much to lose, when there is an alternative that will only cost one loss."
Jude shook his head. "No."
"I can shoulder the cost and, as long as we don't seek for more than what we've paid for, it will be enough to satisfy him."
"I said no, Gel."
I closed my eyes again, wrapping my arms around Rick's waist. "I will not risk what I have left to sate your need to destroy our father."
"You would choose that monster over me?" he snarled in a low voice.
"I will always choose you over everything. That's why I can't give you this war. Not at this time. Not as I am now. Even if we win, it would cost too much." I opened my eyes, meeting his gaze resolutely. "You either bear with this situation or let me pay to get us out of it, but there will be no war. I won't forgive you if you insist upon it and cost me more than I'm willing to pay."
He stood abruptly, taking his chair with him. He marched over to the corner of the room, setting the chair down and getting up on it. He started beating on the camera with a fist until it broke and yanked it off the ceiling. Apparently unsatisfied, he threw it against the wall, huffing harshly while visibly shaking as the fury he had been carefully suppressing tried to overcome him once more.
"We'll bear with it. For now," he said in a leveled voice. "But this war is inevitable, you should already know that. When the time comes, I need you to be there next to me. Not as you are, but as you were meant to be. Do you understand, little Angel?"
"I will do my best to be worthy of my place," I murmured, holding Rick tighter.
He let out a steadying breath, getting off the chair. He went to Stella, kissing her cheek before leaning over and kissing the top of my head.
"You are not a loss I will ever accept," he said. "Nothing in the world is worth the cost of you. Nothing."
I nodded, not having the words to respond at the knowledge of what he was sacrificing. He looked over to Rick and patted his shoulder.
"I have business to attend to in the city. I'll meet you at the townhouse so we can go to the event together. Stella will be coming with me now. Make adjustments for it," he said before turning to her. "Yes, chérie?"
"Y-Yes. Okay," she whispered shakily, tears inexplicably brimming the edges of her eyes.
An almost tangible heaviness filled the room once they left, the weight of despair suffocating me. Rick and I remained sitting at the table, holding each other in a silence that grew insufferable as the nagging anxiety ingrained so deeply into my consciousness festered into paranoia.
"Do you want me to fight for this?" I asked.
He stilled from brushing my hair and drew back to look at me. I raised my hands, cupping his cheeks.
"My grandfather fought to be with my grandmother and won. If he can do that, I can too, but you need to think. What's your plan for us? Because if I'm going to fight for this, you need to have a clear image of our future. You can't just want to be with me and not want anything else. I can't go in front of the family council and tell them I can't marry Andre Gustav because you and I want to keep getting to know each other. You have to know, with absolute certainty, what you want for us. Do you want marriage? Children?"
Conflict and uncertainty filled his eyes. I pulled my hands away from his face, already hopeless.
"My grandfather was already engaged when he met my grandmother, but he knew within hours of meeting her that she was the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with and was willing to wage a war against his father in order to be with her. We are nothing like them, but I know you and you know me." I smiled slightly, stroking his cheek. "And I know, you've had an image in your head for how your life is gonna be ever since you were a kid. A life with me is never gonna be like that, but despite that painful fact, I'm selfishly asking you, do you want to spend the rest of your life with me?"
He swallowed hard, seemingly struggling to speak.
"Don't say yes. You won't mean it."
"I haven't said anything."
"But I know you. You're not thinking. You're just feeling. That's why I can't trust any decision you'll make because you never think when it comes to me. But I've already thought everything over. I've imagined several futures for us. I've analyzed every detail of our relationship. I've thought of all the reasons that we might break up and all the reasons that we might stay together. I've theorised scenarios where you and I will eventually resent each other because of the things we've continued to ignore. I've seen the end of us," I said, speaking purely out of logic and sound reason. "There's no future where we don't end and I'm not just saying that to be pitiful. In all my theories and analyses, I wanted so badly for us to work. I kept trying to find ways to make us work, but it always leads to us either hating each other or leaving each other."
He suddenly kissed me, holding either side of my face. I gasped in a breath of surprise, quickly recovering as I kissed him back.
"Do you feel this?" he whispered as my heartbeat thundered against my chest and my skin trembled from his touch. "You can't make sense of this. You can't find answers for this. You can't put this into a reasonable thought. Whatever analysis you make won't give you any clue to what this is." He met my eyes. "I'm the first to admit you and I are insanity. We're too different to begin with, but what we have, there's nothing that's going to be like it. We can't find this in anyone else and I don't know about you, but I think that's a good enough reason to want to fight for this."
I let out a harsh breath. "I can't win a war with just this."
"Have more faith in us, gorgeous."
I shook my head, pulling away. "Faith is for the ignorant." I slid off him and stood. "I have to get ready. You should go too, or you'll be late for your shift."
I headed up to my room, mindlessly going about drawing a bath. Rick came in as I was going through the bottles of essential oils and herbs lined up on the shelf. He came up to my side and I edged away, returning to the tub.
He grabbed my wrist, pulling me back to him. I kept my head turned away, not trusting myself to resist the satisfying lie he was offering.
"Look at me," he said, pressing his lips on my palm. "Baby, look at me. Please."
Sucking in a breath, I tilted my head slightly to look at him from the corner of my eye. A single glance of him was enough to diminish my resolve to fragile glass that if I looked at him any longer would easily shatter.
"I'm yours," he promised. "I have nothing left to give anyone. You have everything, so fight for me. Please."
I felt myself shatter completely, closing the distance between us and kissing him.
"You're going to cost me so fucking much," I whispered.
"I'll make it worth it."
"I know you will."
Our lips met once more and he wrapped his arms around me, lifting me of my feet and setting me down on the sink. We hastily stripped each other, eager to be one again.
He slipped a finger inside me and was immediately followed by another, his fingers moving in and out of my sleek entrance as his thumb circled my clit simultaneously. He latched his teeth on my nipple, biting and sucking hard. I struggled to supress my moans as his touch drove me crazy. When he removed his fingers, I groaned in complaint.
"Babe…"
"Ssssh. I got you."
He grasped my thighs, carrying me into the tub. Water splashed onto the floor as he sat us down, our hips thrusting for friction. I could feel his tip pressed against my entrance and, gripping my hip with one hand, he slowly guided me along his length. I moaned softly at the feel of his entry, feeling so full and whole with him.
Closing my eyes, I tilted my head back and gripped either side of the tub with both hands as I started rocking against him in a steady rhythm. He bit my breast and I moaned, my body tingling with pleasure as his tongue swiveled around the mark he had made and sucked at it.
I opened my eyes, watching his chest heave as he followed each of my movements with his gaze, groaning when I reached down to rub my clit while hastening my pace. His overwhelming gaze was more than enough to push me over the edge, reeling and trembling in his arms.
Rick made no intention of stopping and instead, turned me around and entered me from behind. He wrapped his arms around me, my back pressed against his chest as he started thrusting deep and slow, and then fast and hard. Alternating between them over and over, driving me closer to another climax.
I clung to him as I felt the familiar sensation of my orgasm, digging my nails into his thighs to let him know I was almost there. He responded by slapping my ass and driving deeper into me. I moaned loudly, not giving a damn.
My head was swimming with arousal. My body was on fire. Filled with the need of a release that only he could give, and I let go, letting my climax take over me. Rick chased his own, his thrusts becoming urgent. When he came, he bit into my shoulder, muffling his groan.
My arms gave out and I fell forward. Rick caught me before I hit the water, embracing me. He stepped out of the tub, heading into the shower.
My back pressed against his chest, we stood under the warm running water. He was dutifully tending to me, wiping away the remnants of him inside me. I felt empty and, as my strength returned, so did the kind of craving only he could evoke.
"You should go," I said before I could let my insatiable desire drive me.
"I'm not going anywhere," he replied firmly.
I managed to smile. "You'll be late for work."
He shook his head. "I'm Angel Lastor's boyfriend. I could be a king if I wanted to. I don't need to work."
I chuckled weakly. "You're such an idiot."
I pressed my lips against the skin of his neck, trailing kisses up his jaw until our lips met.
"I can't take you with me this time," I murmured, continuing to kiss him. "I have to focus on Stella. I can't allow any risk to come to her."
He sighed, grasping either side of my head and tucking my hair behind my ears. "Promise me something. You can live for Jude as long as you have to, but you can't die for him. Promise me."
"He'll never allow my death even if I beg, you know this."
"I do, but I'm worried you'll do it anyway." He cupped my face in his palms. "Promise me."
"I promise," I relented, kissing him lightly. "I have to get ready. I don't have much time left."
"Come back to me no less than this."
"I will." I pressed my forehead against his, closing my eyes. "I truly do not deserve you."
"Keep me anyway."
I smiled. "I'll try."