Chapter 19 - Forget Me Not

A/N Sorry Webnovel will not let me create a separate short novel for this story. I guess I have too many novels on the platform. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Dark, so dark it feels like I'm being pulled. Into the darkness, into the nothingness, into… What? Where am I? How did I get here? When did I get here? Why did I come here? 

"Deku." 

The feeling in my hands has long since disappeared. My toes too, actually when did that happen? What can I feel? My legs? No. Arms? No. My stomach? Nu-uh. My head? 

… 

If I can't feel my head then what do I feel? Is it possible to think without feeling? Anything? Anything at all? 

Help. 

I'm afraid. 

Fear? What is that? Actually who I am? How did I… Did I do this before? How? Why? It hurts. Not feeling anything, it hurts. My soul aches for more. Something. Anything. 

"Deku." 

Where am I? Who am I? What am I? 

… 

…

… 

"Deku!" 

Ouch that hurts. Wait, what hurts? Why? It's something isn't it? It's better than nothing after all. Should I follow it? 

"DEKU!" 

That really hurts. I'm going to follow it. It's better than this… this… Nothingness. So much better than nothing. Don't leave me? Please! Don't leave me alone. Not again. Never again. 

"Please," I whispered. My voice feels like a siren going off in my head. My head? I can feel my head! "He-lp," I tried again the word catching in my throat but I forced it out anyway. A white hot flash sears itself across my face, letting me blink. My vision clouding itself with color and shapes, I'm able to actually make out a little that's around me. 

Blonde. I can see blond hair and piercing red eyes that feel like they can see into my very soul. Sharp enough to cut, hard enough to see through the lies, frantic enough to try. Frantic? That doesn't seem right. Why is it wrong? What is going on? 

"Who-?" I coughed needing to clear my throat, stirring up a coughing fit that burned my throat. Is there something there that shouldn't be? Why does it hurt to breathe? "Who are you?" I finally managed to force the words out, needing the answer far more than I needed air to breathe. 

Horror. His eyes widened; fear, shock horror, so much horror. Why? Why does it bother me so much that he is upset? 

A pain blooms in my chest and I'm forced to bend over, coughing until something comes out. Feathers? No, that's not right. Petals? Flower petals? Red, a deep crimson color that made me look up again. They match. They match the eyes looking at me in fear and shock. 

"So pretty," I whispered, a rush floods through me. I'm light headed and I feel sick to my stomach but I can't look away from his eyes. My eyelids grow heavy but I fight them. If they close I can't see him anymore. I can't see that pretty red that seemed to give meaning to life. 

"I'm sorry," I whispered but forced myself to go on. "Who am I? Who are you? Why? I can't-," I can't understand. A pain throbbed in my head and I lost my balance just to feel his strong arms wrap around me, protecting me from the cold of the ground. 

"Can I-," I paused, not sure if I'm actually allowed to ask but not able to stay silent either. "Can I stay with you?" 

"Yes, close your eyes. I don't want you to see this," his voice sounds so very raw. Hoarse. Had he been screaming? Why? Is he okay? 

I closed my eyes, feeling his hand play with my hair. He pulled me against his chest and I tucked my face into his neck. 

"I think I love you," I whispered. There was a large boom, an explosion close by but instead of getting upset or scared, I relaxed. His arm around me holding me against his strong body, the way his muscles moved against me, pressing me close, straining to hold me together. 

It feels nice. 

I relaxed into the darkness that my closed eyes created. Enjoyed the warmth he created against my skin. The cold ebbed away as he gently and carefully held me. The sounds surrounding us slowly faded out until the sweet darkness that was sleep finally consumed me. 

*** 

"Deku?" I jerked at the name, starting awake. I'm in a room, a very clean room, one that smells heavily of chemicals but all the same it is clean. I blinked several times, trying to place where I am but nothing comes to mind. I look around frantically trying to figure out where I am when I see those red eyes. They are red rimmed, displaying the fact that he has been crying a lot recently. 

"Who are you?" I asked, coughing and clearing my throat. Wow, it really hurts to talk. I looked down when something hit my hand just to see flower petals again. Bright red, vibrant and so full of life, the petals must go to something beautiful but I don't have a name for it. The frills on the edges, the way the silky thread like veins spiraled throughout, promising life forever. Life. So beautiful. 

How did this come out of my mouth? I don't think I had anything in my mouth before? I reached up but the blonde man stopped me. Tears spilling from his eyes but they were focused on the flower petals in my hand. 

"What's wrong? Are you okay? By the way," I paused looking around again but I still don't see anything of real note that could tell me anything. "Who am I?" 

The blonde man cried. He held onto me, clutching at my hand as if I would somehow try to pull away from him but I don't want to. 

"Will you hold me? Please? I'm sorry I don't even know who I am but you're just being close… It helps so much," I whispered my request and he quickly nodded. He helped me move over so he could fit next to me on the bed. His black clothes were dirty but they smelled nice. He smells sweet, like candy. Soothing, like childhood memories. 

I curled into his arms snuggling close when he opened his arms for me. 

"I never knew," he whispered and his voice sounded so nice. Like a bubbling creak while the water splashed on the rocks, or the sound of cicadas in the distance on a hot summer day while you're playing in the stream. 

"Life," I whispered and he jerked before looking at me. 

"What?" He asked, confused and is that hope I hear? 

"You are. You are Life. The air, the sun, the sea and the earth under my feet. You are everything and more," I smiled at the thought before cuddling close again and he let me. "I don't even know your name but the thought of you leaving hurts. Will you stay? Will you let me stay with you?" I looked up and those red eyes pierced right through me. Seeing my everything; my soul, my thoughts, my dreams and my very being. I feel so at home and I never want to leave. 

"Yes. Stay with me, forever. Don't leave me, Deku," he answered, his hands gently combing through my hair and I let out a small gasp quickly followed by a small moan. 

"No! Don't stop, please," I started to panic when he pulled away but when he resumed the movement I let out another coo. "I like you touching me. It feels so good, like I've waited forever just for this," I whispered, closing my eyes so I could focus on just him. 

"What else do you want? Tell me, I'll do it," he whispered, his breath warm against my ear, tickling me but I smiled at him, opening my eyes again. 

"You, all I want is you. Is that okay?" I asked him nervously but his arms flexed, pulling me closer, so that I was pressed right against him. His arms holding me together and the cough I felt coming faded a little so I could smile. 

"Yes. I'm yours, all yours," he answered and I felt a kiss on my forehead making me giggle at the affection. 

"Can you do that again? I like it," I giggled, sleepy. I'm so very sleepy. Why am I so tired? I felt his lips again, this time slower and when he stopped he did it again and again. Littering my face with the sweet gesture while I giggled happily. I decided to return the gesture, catching him by surprise and I laughed at the shock on his face before doing it again this time getting his chin. 

"I like this. I like it a lot," I giggled happily before crawling on top of him, pinning him down under me. "I like it more than words could ever say." I meant it too. Happiness seemed to well up inside of me just being near him and these small things only made it bubble up and bloom inside of me. I left more kisses. He tilted his head for me, letting me go or do whatever I wanted. 

"Bro!" I jumped at the sudden noise but when I looked up I saw red eyes and red hair, a man had barged into the room but froze at the sight of us. 

"Who are you?" I asked innocently, I could feel something uncomfortable in my chest and wheezed a little. I tried to hold myself together, my hands going to my chest to try and somehow hold myself together before I started coughing again. Red petals. Bright red, the kind that could light a fire in my soul but when I looked up at the red haired man his eyes were murky, almost muddy in comparison. I don't like it. 

I turned back to the blonde man under me. He looked shocked and afraid. He snapped at the other man to leave and to lock the door on his way but he carefully held me. 

"Does it hurt? I'm here. I promise I'm here for you. I only want you," his whispered words helped. The tightness in my chest loosened, letting me breathe again. I felt his lips on my skin as he started kissing my face again; my cheeks, my forehead, my chin. I started giggling at the soft affection. The pain subsided for now at least. 

"It's called hanahaki disease," he whispered as if answering the question currently on my mind. The flower petals really are beautiful but why do I keep coughing them up? 

"A disease? But they are so pretty. Like your eyes. Wow your eyes are so pretty, I could look into them for the rest of my life," I sighed cuddling into his arms again. The fact I am still on top of him didn't seem to bother him and I don't want to get off either. 

"Well it's not really a disease. Someone with a quirk got angry because you wouldn't go on a date with them. It will fade away in a while so long as you don't…" he trailed off. He sounds so sad. I could hear a barely contained sob but pretended not to notice. "It's the name of their quirk, Hanahaki Disease." He doesn't seem to want me to notice so I'll just pretend. If that's what it takes to make him feel better. 

"A quirk? That sounds interesting. What is it? Actually who am I? No, better question, who are you? Your eyes give me butterflies and your voice gives me chills. I want you to hold me forever," I sighed cuddling into the man. 

"I'm…" he let out a long sigh before continuing. "I'm yours. You usually call me Kacchan though." I smiled at the name. 

"Kacchan, I love it. My Kacchan," I cuddled into him but at the same time I didn't want to only cuddle. I want more, so much more. I feel like I'm starving and Kacchan is my dinner. I want him, all of him. 

"Kacchan can I do more of those things? From earlier?" I asked him trying to be sweet but I saw him smirk making the butterflies in my stomach dance. 

"Yeah, anything you want," he answered and the tickle in my throat died a little. I smile before giving him kisses, letting myself explore him a little. My fingers tangling in his hair, the softness should be illegal, I just want to pet and cuddle him forever. His hair, feather-like as it was, was nothing compared to his hard lean muscles that he is currently using to hold me tight against him. 

Oh I like this a lot. 

I adjusted myself a little and a kiss aimed for the tip of his nose slipped down and landed on his lips. I felt him go rigid under me but I also felt his hands clutch at my shirt, pulling me in to hold me. So I deepened the kiss instead of pulling away. My mouth opened to find his tongue waiting for me. The feel of him wrapping around me, curling, pulling, tugging, ensnaring me… Yes. Oh my God, yes. 

"More," I moaned while taking a breath. I desperately needed air but I didn't want to stop either, only to hear his chuckles. My hands moved on their own, making his shirt disappear after we pulled away for just a breath. 

He pulled off mine and we were actively helping each other undress until he was under me naked. What do I do now? I don't want to stop but it feels like I can do more. 

"Kacchan, I want more," I whispered my groan, irritated with my own lack of understanding. 

He pulled my face towards his and kissed me, it wasn't light but he didn't push either. I relaxed against his well defined body, his toned muscles reached and moved and I found my hands pressing against them. Beautiful. He makes breathing look like an art form, the way his body simply moved to meet mine. 

I kissed him again and again. Our bodies pressed against each other. I felt my hard cock bump into something equally as hard and looked down. I could see him straining, his shaft throbbing in the air from his excitement and even a little pre cum on his tip, letting me know that this was going exactly where I wanted it to go but where is that? What do I want? I want more, I want so much more than this but what does that mean? 

I grabbed us both in my large hand and he jolted at the touch but the look on his face kept me from letting go. I carefully moved up and down, it feels good. Really good. Could it feel better? 

I kissed him, this time he didn't seem to really be thinking much at all, his body rolled and thrusted, reacting to my touch while he kissed me. His arms behind my head pulling me in, preventing me from leaving, I kissed him. Our tongues slipped and slid and claimed each other while we tried to breathe without letting each other go until I jerked away and bit into his neck. 

"Aaaahhh, yes!" The way he moaned had my blood pumping more. I want more. I need more. I trailed my kisses down to his chest. His amazing chest; how are his muscles so thick and fleshy? I just want to kiss and bite him, leave marks all over him so that the world would know. He is mine. All mine. Only mine. 

I licked and kissed a nipple, swirling my tongue around while my hands pressed deep into his back and shoulder muscles. He arched his back, trying to meet my touch by any means and in any way. I heard him moan my name. 

"Deku, oh Deku. Yes Deku," the words dripped from his lips, urging me on. I trailed down to his abs, it's not fair. How is he so toned? Each bundle of muscles were clearly defined, begging for attention as if there was no other reason to be there at all except for this right now. 

I finally reached his dick, his tip dripping his pre cum while the head was almost purple from the pressure. I wonder, what would it taste like? Is it edible? Can I… 

I licked out and Kacchan's whole body arched off the bed. It's not bad, a little sweet even. I licked out again and again, liking how he reacted, how his body wouldn't hold still. I slowed down. I swirled my tongue around the tip before an idea came to me. Why don't I suck on it? That has to feel good right? I mean he likes me licking it so why not try? 

Carefully I sucked just the head in, letting my teeth scrape along his skin and Kacchan let out a long moan. I kissed and swirled my tongue around the head for a little while before I noticed the drool. Huh he seems to like it though, even if it is making a mess. I let him slide further into my mouth and I heard the long low yes from his lips. 

Can I make him like it more? Why don't I… I used a hand to wipe up the excess drool noting how he jumped and twitched at how his balls were touched. He's so sensitive. Everywhere down here seems to make him jump and beg for more. I like it. I like it a lot. 

What if? I carefully watched him before letting a finger slide down his skin, trailing down to a small opening and the moment I touched it he jumped and froze. Oh, interesting. 

I carefully pushed on it, using the drool to wet it down and there was a very different type of moan that escaped him. It was softer, nervous but vulnerable. I pulled off of his thick throbbing cock to ask. 

"Should I stop?" I don't want to. I really want to keep going. I want more. It was like something in my very core demanded that I take what I wanted but at the same time I don't want to hurt him. What if it's too much for him? What if I hurt him? 

"No!" His answer was so fast it startled me but my fingers continued to tease at the small hole I found. "I like it," he added quietly, it was like he was embarrassed by the fact that he liked it but at the same time he didn't want to stop either. I licked at his head again before sucking him back into my mouth at the same time that I let a finger slip inside. His whole body flinched but then he relaxed back, arching into my attention. 

I closed my eyes for a moment, just letting myself do what I wanted. The feel of him in my mouth, twitching and throbbing in answer to both what my tongue could do but my fingers as well. 

"Fuck yeah, more," Kacchan moaned and I froze for half a second. This is the first time he has asked but I can't disappoint him now can I? 

I slipped another finger in and the way he moaned out set my soul alight. I twisted and turned my fingers, spreading them as I could before I slipped another in. His shaft throbbed in my mouth and his moans filled the air before his voice rose and he came. He filled my mouth with the bitter substance. It wasn't difficult to swallow though. If anything it made things easier. 

When I was done cleaning up the mess that had spilled out of my mouth I pulled away still wanting more but not entirely sure how I wanted it. 

Kacchan was still twitching under me but he met my eyes. "More," he mouthed and I pulled my fingers out. It should fit. I just had three fingers inside of him, it should fit. I climbed closer and he wrapped his legs around my waist reinforcing my thoughts. I carefully lined up but it was hard. Too dry. Drool worked before so why not? I rubbed it on my head thick before pushing again, this time it went in a little. Kacchan flexed, his back arching up, his head thrown back and I started kissing his chest again. 

I remembered how I moved my fingers, never staying still for too long. Not that I wanted to stay still at all. I carefully rocked my hips, letting his legs decide how much further I pushed. His strong muscles pulled at me, leaving me breathless even as I kissed him. 

"Deeper," he moaned. I couldn't help it, the demand was so enticing. I flexed my hips, letting myself push all the way in and hear him cry out my name. "Deku!" 

I want more. So much more. He pulled at me, cried for me, hugged me, kissed me. Then he screamed for me. 

"Fuck yes!" His fingers clawed at me, scratching up my back while he tried more and more to take me. Each thrust was almost too much. Each moan and cry drives me to the very edge of my sanity. I slammed into him and I heard the hitch in his breathing really I did but… But. 

I couldn't stop. Again and again I thrusted, slamming into his willing body until I couldn't take it anymore. I came. I couldn't pull away, pushing as far as I could only to look down and see a mess already coating his abs and parts of his chest. When did he cum? How did I miss it? 

He shook and shuddered under me giving me the clues I needed and that was that he came at the same time I did. I let a finger trail on his arm and he shook violently under me, his legs not relaxing at all were still holding me, his eyes were screwed shut and his body tense. Beautiful. Then I saw it. I looked down at the slight movement just as he throbbed and a small squirt spilled out of him. 

Oh I didn't miss it at all, he was just still in the middle of it. Suddenly I really want to taste something bitter. 

I carefully unwrapped his legs from me and gently pulled out. His cries hanging in the air were followed by frustrated grumbles. 

"It's okay, I just want a taste," I whispered, kissing him carefully. The moment I was safely outside of him I bent down for a lick just to glance up and see his bright red face. Oh, he likes it. He likes it a lot. 

I returned my attention to licking up his climax just to feel myself getting hard again. I mean how is he so amazing? His body moved and only seemed to be drawing me in more and more. Once I was done cleaning him up I went further down to find his shaft pretty hard, not completely but he did just cum twice so I think this is pretty amazing. I licked and sucked on his tip before returning for a kiss. 

He was panting, his body demanding air when there just didn't seem to be enough. His pale cheeks flushed in his excitement, his eyes glazed over in his lust while the rest of his body reached out for me. 

"Again?" I asked him almost silently but he understood me perfectly. 

"Yes-sss!" he almost choked when I thrusted in, breaking the word apart before his lips were on mine and my world fell apart while I gave in to the temptation under me. 

Mine. 

*** 

"Hmmm, Deku?" I woke up to my name being spoken so lazily in the most dreamy of voices. I kissed what must have been my pillow but my sleep deprived brain had turned into a hot firm body. Yes, dreams really are the best. I tighten my arms to pull him in closer, my dream lover, Kacchan. I grunted at the feel of him taking me in, my cock easily slipping into the hottest cock sleeve imaginable. I wonder if they will come out with a Dynamight cock sleeve soon? It hasn't been very long since we graduated but I'm sure it will happen soon. After all, Kacchan is amazing. 

"Talking about cock sleeves while you're inside of me? Am I not good enough for you?" Kacchan snapped at me and I let my hips rock, making him moan. 

"Hmmm, just wondering if they can make something nearly as amazing as you," I whispered, finding him more than responsive to my touch. Yes, dreams are amazing. 

"Then you better fuck me harder, make sure you remember my ass or I just might blow yours up," he chuckled before wincing. A thrust going a little harder than I intended. "Fuck yeah, now we're talking," he moaned and I couldn't hold back anymore. I rolled him over so he was on his stomach and I slammed into him from behind. His cries and moans set me off even further. 

"I'm going to fill you until I'm the only one on your mind," I whispered into his ear, kissing along the edges before thrusting again. 

"Yes, yes, yes, yes," he panted, rocking his hips in time with mine so that they hit just a little harder, so they could go just a little deeper. "Fuck me!" He whined and I slapped his ass making him cry out and… Did he just cum? Already? 

"Fucking kiss me," he demanded, turning enough to grab my face and force his tongue in my mouth. I pulled out only to hear him whine, pitifully before he seemed to get an idea. He pushed me onto my back and climbed on top just to sink down on me. His legs wide open letting me see just how turned on he was and I couldn't stay away. At first it was just a hand on his hips, helping to guide him and then I gently stroked him. His head was thrown back from the stimulation but now I really don't want to stop. I let him go only to grab the other side of his hip and slam him down on top of me. 

He cried out his bliss, making me do it again and again until I couldn't take anymore and I came. His cries in the air dancing with mine. I didn't let him go. For the first time I felt sated. My body relaxed except for my hands that were still gripping his hips hard enough to leave bruises. 

"Holy fuck, we need to do that again," Kacchan chuckled from above me, confusing me. Usually at the end of my erotic dreams he gets mad and shuns me. Pushing me away not… Not this. 

"Oi, Deku?" He looked at me, pushing his sweaty bangs from his face smiling. Dear God, that smile could make me do anything. "How long before you can get it up again? You want more right? More of me? All of me?" He teased at my sanity before bending down and kissing me on the lips. "I'll give you all of me but only if you give me all of you," he whispered, smirking at me. 

"Too late," I whispered and he looked at me confused. "You already have all of me," I answered before grabbing him and kissing him hard, rolling us over before I rolled my hips and sure enough I could feel him bucking from under me. 

"Fuck!" He moaned, his body immediately responding to my touches. It didn't take long, the way he spasmed from under me, his legs around my waist, his arms over my shoulders, how he kissed me whenever he could reach. I came hard. 

"I," I started to say something, really I did but he pulled me in for another kiss and I just couldn't stop. 

"Leave a hickey right here," he turned his head showing me his mostly bare neck. "Make sure that we never forget and then fuck me again. Fuck me until the thought of stopping hurts and then keep fucking me. I'm already yours so use me damn it!" 

I didn't understand the change, or how any of this came to be but when he kissed me again all I could think was, this is real. This isn't a dream. Kacchan is really under me screaming out my name. He is mine. 

I felt an ache in my chest and had to stop. A coughing fit wracked my body until something came out but I didn't recognize it. It's small and hard but black in most places only showing traces of red in others. 

"Huh? What's this?" I wiped at my mouth but I didn't find any traces of blood. 

"Looks like you're back to normal," Kacchan chuckled and I looked back at his face before he reached up and kissed me. "Just kiss me, fuck me and when we come home again, by the way you are moving in. I'm not moving into that tiny ass apartment of yours, we are going to do it again and again." He smirked only wincing when I tried to pull out a little just to slide right back in. "Fuck yeah!" He moaned and even as confused as I am, I know one thing. 

"I love my Kacchan," I whispered only for him to giggle and kiss me. 

"And I love my Deku." Is this real? Now I'm not sure, it all seems too perfect to be real. 

***

"So, what happened?" I asked him after we had been laying down and cuddling for a while. "Don't get me wrong, I loved waking up to this but I have no idea how it happened." I laughed nervously but he didn't get mad. No, if anything he looked sad at whatever it is that he's thinking of. 

It took a while, like he couldn't figure out what to say or where to start but eventually he let out a sigh and asked, "What's the last thing you remember?"

"Umm, we were just getting back to headquarters after patrolling. By the way I think we would make great hero partners, I think we really work well together," I paused to add but when he just smiled I relaxed and added, "We were talking about where we could get the best sushi." 

"That's it?" He asked and I nodded and he groaned before saying, "Deku, that was almost a month ago."

"A month? What's happened in the last month? I'm so far behind on my paperwork! Dear All Might, I'll have to reschedule all of those appearances that I was supposed to make! Crap, wasn't I supposed to do a game show or something too? I'm booked out, how am I supposed to make them all up?" I whined but Kacchan chuckled and when I looked at him even his eyes were smiling while he watched me. I want to cry, how can he be this freaking hot even while I'm panicking? 

"Deku, as heroes there is always a clause in case of quirk accidents. You can probably make up a couple but you're not required to and considering you can't say no I'm not surprised you're so booked. What about dating? When did you think we would spend time together hmm?" He teased me but I couldn't help how my expression dropped. "What?" 

"Well, I spend a lot of time alone if I'm not doing those things so…" how do I actually tell him that I can't stand being alone while everyone else went on dates. Of course they would invite me out without me even saying anything and Kaminari still actively tries to drag me to bars or on blind dates that he set up but, it just didn't feel right. 

"Hmmm, I didn't think you actually had time for anything else," he nodded to himself as if it all made sense. "So how far out are you booked?" 

"Only a month, well I guess not anymore," I paused realizing how long it had been all over again. "I'm going to be so bored," I groaned and he chuckled. 

"Really? You can't think of anything else you could be doing during that time?" He smirked before placing a kiss on my chest and you know what? 

"I think I'll wait to book any more appointments for a while," I whispered and he grinned, letting me kiss him. 

"I think that's for the best. Your health comes first," he grinned and I laughed before he added, "I really need to use some of my vacation time anyway?" 

"Would you look at that? So do I," we both chuckled, kissing each other, teasing as we went until he climbed on top of me. 

"No better time to get started than now," he licked his lips, eyeing me up and down but he waited until I agreed before sending both of our hearts racing all over again. 

*** 

He avoided my question. How didn't I notice until now? Just how? Or did we just get distracted? I really shouldn't put all the blame on him. Nope. I enjoyed myself far too much for that. 

"Kacchan, you said it happened a month ago but not what it was that happened," I tried to prompt him and he looked at me sleepy and confused for a minute. Okay, I might have been a little rough in my excitement this time. For some reason it feels like my body just can't get enough of him and I know that it's dangerous but I just can't stay away. Hell even now I'm cuddled around him, holding him tight and I could feel myself already getting hard just from holding him but I can't. I need to focus! No matter how absolutely delicious he is. How dreamy his eyes are while looking up with that dazed look of his. 

Fuck, I'm already hard. 

"What?" he asked, still looking confused but when he didn't understand right away he just turned in my arms and started kissing me. 

Oh dear willpower, stay strong please. "I really need to know the answer to my question." 

"What question?" He mumbled before kissing and then biting my neck and I let out a moan. 

"Kacchan!" I yelled while pushing him away a little but I didn't let him go, I could never let him go. My willpower was rapidly crumbling but I have to try. 

"What happened a month ago that made me forget everything?" I forced the words out but he looks heartbroken just from me pushing him away. Dear All Might, I'm going to hell. Straight to hell, do not pass go, do not collect $200. 

Fuck. 

"Nevermind, it can wait a little longer, I guess," I caved. I mean those sad red eyes of his really did me in. When have I ever seen him look so vulnerable before? When? 

"How about a bath?" I suggested after I ended up pulling him back into my arms and he instantly cuddled into me again. 

"Mmm, that sounds nice," he giggled and I did a double take before he reached up and kissed me again. "But I don't know if I can stand right now," he smirked up at me. Did I hit his head at some point? I don't think so. I slammed his hips into the mattress a few dozen times but not his head. 

"I'll go set the water," I gave him a quick kiss and he whined at the loss. Oh he is going to be the end of me. How is he being so cute right now? Just how? 

When I came back for him I saw him dreamily stretching and flexing his body making me pause. His now marbled skin was breathtaking to watch and even with him moaning and groaning the fact that he was making the kind of faces I never saw before having sex really had me rock hard again. 

I climbed up on the bed between his legs and he paused just to smile at me, his legs instantly wrapping around me while his arms reached for me. Am I missing something? I can't pull away, not that I want to or anything. No, I like exactly where I am. The way he pulled me in for a kiss, how his body shuddered while I pushed inside, how his nails gently scratched my back with each slow thrust. 

"We should hurry, the water heater is on," I whispered as if I actually cared. Even though I kissed just below how he was letting my body gently push into him with each thrust. So hot, so tight, he seemed to suck me in, milking me slowly and driving me crazy at the same time. I heard him hum but I couldn't really focus on that when he slipped his tongue in my mouth. I pulled out a little further and thrusted harder, it was the only quicky up until now but when he cried out my name I couldn't keep it gentle anymore. 

I pulled all the way out and he almost looked angry before I flipped him over face down in the bed. I rubbed a hand from his ass up his back before I pushed back in again and kissed the back of his shoulders. I leaned in close to his ear. 

"I hope you can take this, I can't hold back anymore," I whispered and I heard him growl almost playfully. My hands moved to his hips letting me lightly thrust a few times. How much sex have we had that we didn't even need to use lube? I don't remember using a condom ever either. He is going to be so mad when his mind clears later but the way he was begging for more, whimpering at the slow steady thrusts. Something snapped in me and I slammed into him and he cried out. 

Again. 

Again. 

Again, I could feel my end coming but I couldn't stop, couldn't slow down, his back arching with each thrust, every cry sending my heart pounding faster. His hot body wrapped around me squeezing, holding, pulling me in. He turned his head to the side and I stole his lips, muffling his cries but I didn't slow down. Yes. So hot. So needy. So perfect. 

I gasped, pulling away from his kiss just so I could go harder. I watched his body flex and move, how his hands grabbed handfuls of the sheets. I heard something rip but neither of us paid any attention to it. His cries make me faster, I have him pinned under me, begging for more, his body swallowing me up. 

I slammed into him once more and screamed. I can't move. I don't want to move, his body wouldn't let me move, squeezing me so tight, refusing to let me go while my cum filled him. His body shook under me. I could hear him whining, begging, pleading but the only things that really stood out was one word; yes. Over and over again, his body trembled but his hips and below didn't move, still locking me into place. 

"The water should be ready," I whispered hoarsely in his ear and he cried out when I tried to adjust myself so I froze for a second and put more pressure on him again. 

"Again," I heard a whisper of the word but I couldn't really believe my ears. 

"What?" He didn't actually say that, did he? Could he even take it? Could I even give it? Actually now that I think about it, it's still hard. How am I still hard? I know I came. It was far too explosive for it to be anything else and even now the relief was still flooding my body. I kissed the back of his neck and noticed how salty it was. We have had a lot of sex in a very short time and none of it was easy. I don't know, maybe the first time that I still don't remember was gentle maybe but none of the times that I actually remembered were gentle for very long. Not long at all. 

"Again, please? Just once more. I need to feel you fill me," he turned his head and his eyes were watery but the skin around them was relaxed. "Please?" 

I carefully pulled out, still surprised by how hard I was and gave a quick thrust forward, crying out with him from the stimulation. Oh. 

I did it again and again, loving how he writhed from his place under me. His voice gave out completely in our bliss. I pulled all the way out and turned him over, ignoring the mess on the bed that we'll have to clean up later, for now. I moved his legs for him, not at all surprised when he couldn't do more than hook them behind me and I pushed in again, this time from the front. His head thrown back, I kissed and bit his chest and neck until I heard the raspy, airy, "almost," from him. 

I know I can't cum, not yet, not when it's been so intense so far. It would take several more minutes at best but I also can't disappoint him either. I rolled us over, my hands on his waist to keep him steady and I actually felt myself go deeper. It wasn't much but the way he reacted was beautiful. How he tried to scream out, his hands leaving what looked like claw marks on my chest. Oh, we are doing this one again. 

I tilted his hips back and forth, feeling myself grind deep inside of him. I saw him shudder, I saw how his body trembled, how his eyes couldn't even focus anymore. 

Harder. 

I lifted him up just a little before thrusting up at the same time that I pulled him back down, I could feel the ache, how our bodies demanded more, and then he came. His body squeezing around me, he couldn't hold still while I kept moving his hips, his silent screams urging me on. The look of him completely falling apart above excited me more. I am doing this to him. Me. No one else is allowed to touch him, not anymore. 

I didn't cum. I did pull out though. I could feel how shaky my legs were but I still picked him up and took him to the bathroom. I turned on the water and let it rinse us both off before I braced him against the shower wall and pushed back inside again. The faces he could make, the faces I could make him make. 

I pulled out several times, using my fingers in-between to try and help clean him out just to thrust back in again to not only love him but to maybe work out a little of what was inside of him. I don't actually know if it helped or not but the way he scratched at me, grabbed me, tried to pull me closer seemed to suggest that he at least liked it. 

I turned the water off, filling the tub. He was not happy that I pulled out and washed myself, probably guessing that I wouldn't go back in. Logically I know that I shouldn't. He needs to rest. He needs to heal because I would never believe that he is actually 100% okay after everything we've done. Not with how rough, hard, demanding, beggingly needy we have been. In the bright light above us now I could see the bruises on his hips, the scratches down his skin and then there were the bite marks. Did he really like me doing that to him? How didn't it hurt? 

"Don't worry you can ride me in the tub, I can't let you go that easily," I chuckled while internally cursing myself for my lack of willpower. When it comes to Kacchan I never have any willpower. The deadliest thing I've ever seen happened next though. He smiled, big and wide he leaned forward and kissed me. His legs wouldn't let me go even while I stepped into the tub but once I was seated he was climbing up on me, using the water to his advantage. 

"I never want to let you go," he mouthed, his voice completely gone. I caved. I helped him. I fingered him to try and help clean him out just a bit more. Once he was on top of me though he grabbed my wrists and held them over my head. "Let me?" What exactly? Him not being able to actually talk is making this a lot harder than I thought it would be. 

He slipped up and down me, grinding me deep inside of him, his arms doing most of the work and his large fleshy pecs in front of me. I let myself cave. Between me attacking his chest, him holding my arms hostage and his grinding I was able to watch him cum again. He didn't let himself slowly recover though. Instead he lifted himself off of me and grabbed the soap again. I watched him clean me but I couldn't help thrusting into his hands. The feel of the soapy slipperiness was almost too much, especially after watching him orgasm so much. 

"Up," he demanded, completely off of me now and I let out a whine at the loss only for him to use his now clean empty hand to pump me. I did as I was told, mostly because I couldn't help following his hand when he would go just out of reach. Now out of the water he kissed my tip, his hand still at my base. "Just a little more," he smirked at me before opening his mouth wide and taking me in. 

Should I be ashamed of how quickly I came? I would be surprised if he told me I lasted five minutes, it was probably closer to two. 

I watched him lick up the thick globs of cum that splattered around his mouth but he couldn't get what had already dripped down his chin and neck before sucking my head back in again like he could somehow use me as a straw. When he was satisfied he let me go and pulled me back down into the water cleaning his face and neck before cuddling into my arms. 

"Just two minutes, just two please," I heard him mumble but I'm pretty sure he was out after that. I played with his hair not knowing how to process everything that's happened over the last couple of days but I don't think I can until I find out what all happened but then again finding out what's going on with Kacchan is more important because this single minded obsession is driving me crazy! 

***

I woke up in bed confused. I don't remember leaving the bathtub or even falling asleep. The bed was made with clean sheets and when I sat up I found myself all alone. All alone in my own bed… 

Was it all a dream? I looked at my body to find the scratches and bruises that I remember him giving me but did he really? I felt a tickle in my throat and cleared it but it wouldn't go away. I let out a sigh and decided to add going to the doctor's to my to do list. I looked at my phone and my heart sank. I guess it was just a dream. It hasn't been a month. I am not missing a month of memories at all because a month hasn't passed. I mean the first part of my dream was weird, why would I forget everything like that? But the second part had to be weirder because after I remembered everything I forgot again. Dreams are weird, so very weird. 

I forced myself out of bed and got dressed. I can't stay this way. I'm going to make myself sick if I keep thinking about what I can't have, if I keep pining like this. I let out a slow breath and picked up my phone again. Canceling everything I had planned for the month after this week. Just like in my dream, I can't go on dates if I'm constantly tied up with work. I can't even pretend to have a somewhat normal life so I need to change. I need to change now. 

I went to headquarters and smiled at everyone as I passed them, some stopped to chat but most were busy. The life of a hero, we are always busy. I called and confirmed my appearance on a reality show this evening and just like always the day passed by like any other. The week was no different, passing in almost a blink of an eye. 

"So Deku, is it true that you're going to be on Heroes Live next week?" The reporter I was with gushed happily. 

"Actually no, I've decided to take some time to myself. I've noticed that my movements were a bit sluggish over the past few weeks and decided that I should take some time to rest. I'll still be working as a hero of course but I am considering taking a vacation. I have a lot of time saved up after all," I smiled brightly and she seemed taken aback but then again, I haven't actually told anyone that I was feeling run down either. 

"Oh my goodness, aren't you known for never having taken a vacation? Or any time off at all really?" She looked startled and didn't really seem to know what to say next. "Have you gotten sick?" 

"Well I am only human after all," I chuckled to myself, yes, I'm only human and I need to start acting like it. The interview finished pretty quickly after that, after all I didn't officially say that I was going on a real vacation, just that I was considering it. It feels odd, not being completely swamped with a to-do list a mile long. 

I came home just as my housekeeper was locking up for the day, another first. 

"Oh heavens, you scared the daylights out of me," she patted her chest trying to literally turn her light quirk off. 

"Sorry about that. Oh by the way I'll be coming home earlier for a while so try not to jump every time I come home," I tried to soothe her. 

"Oh course Mr. Deku! I saw your interview and I am so relieved that you're taking your health seriously! I'll come earlier in the day so that I won't disturb you," she smiled and chatted before excusing herself. It's nice not to have to deal with cleaning up general messes throughout the day. Momo is the one that recommended her and it's not expensive to have her come over for an hour a day while I'm at work. 

I walked inside and found a small cake that said Get well soon on it and chuckled. I guess I know what I'll have when I feel like something sweet. 

Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment scheduled before my shift so it's for the best that I go to sleep early. I smile to myself while climbing into bed. At least, I'll be able to start taking care of myself. 

***

"Mr. Deku, how long have you had that tickle in your throat?" The doctor had completely given up on trying to say Mr. Midoriya by now. He tried at first he really did but I guess this is what happens when you're a famous hero. 

"Just a few days, I actually had a weird dream about it before it started," I laughed nervously and after a few more questions he nodded on understanding. 

"Mr. Deku, I'm afraid that your dream was simply your body giving you a warning. You have what is known as Hanahaki Disease, yes it's a real thing, although extremely rare. It's not nearly as bad as what stories make it out to be but all the same, you will slowly lose your ability to empathize with people if you don't take care of it." I froze at the doctor's words. 

"Would I die?" I asked but he shook his head and I let out a silent sigh of relief. 

"No you won't for but after it sets in it gets progressively faster, and so very much worse," he hesitated to tell me more but finally decided he had to. "You will start coughing up the flower petals in a few more days, maybe a week and then blood in about three, from now, not after. Then you'll start to notice that things that once made you smile won't be appealing anymore and in order to be the same hero you've always been, you'll have to pretend, which will only make it a thousand times faster. Eventually though, you will not be able to feel happiness or sadness, then eventually even pain will not hinder you at all. You will slowly lose your will to live if you can somehow survive without feeling pain. It will only be a matter of time before you stop eating and drinking properly and you will waste away." 

"Is there a cure? A treatment of some kind?" I asked, hoping it could be easy. I mean who wants to lose all their emotions? I won't even be able to react to pain? How would I be a hero at that point? 

"There are three treatment methods. First treat the source, confess your feelings and hope they return them. At this point only confessing isn't enough though. Not now that it has manifested into the physical stages," he explained and I felt my shoulders droop. So in other words if Kacchan doesn't love me back then it is meaningless to even try. 

"Second, you would need to find someone to sleep with regularly. It couldn't be a prostitute either, it needs to be the same person every time so that you might be able to transfer your feelings to them over time. They would have to be physically intimate with you every single day," and I felt my face flush and I hid my face. How could I do that? To anyone? They would know that I would never truly love them and how could anyone do that willingly? "The catch with that is that they would have to love you. If you ever found them cheating on you or you two broke up for whatever reason the disease would come back full force because that treatment only makes it dormant at most. You will still have it for the rest of your life." 

I nodded in understanding, it's not a real cure either. "And the last?" I asked hopefully. 

"Being physically intimate with someone, anyone will slow the process but it will not stop it. It could buy you time to get your affairs in order," he averted his eyes. In other words, I could plan my own funeral, literally. 

"I see," I slumped in my seat. I guess there is no fairytale ending or glamorous treatment to make me better. 

A few more things were said and I was released from the office with a light prescription to help numb the pain a little. "The pain will become unbearable in just a few weeks at most. Take these then," he told me and I left his office. I had to go straight to headquarters though so I will just have to put them in my belt for now. 

***

It was the end of the day and it's really dark out now. Not that I'm surprised, it's almost 11 now. I looked up at the stars from my office window. Will there really be a day that I don't feel anything at all? The fact that this disease won't kill me off until I can't bear to get up anymore really feels hopeless. I mean wouldn't I still be dying from the disease? I mean really! 

I sat back in my chair and I felt a tear slip out. "I won't even be able to cry soon," I whispered to myself before wiping the tears away. Now that I think about it, he never told me if it was reversible or not. 

"Nerd, why are you crying now?" I jumped at the all too familiar voice and turned to see the man that both made me who I am today and the reason for my demise. 

Kacchan. 

"Kacchan? How long have you been here? Sorry I didn't know that I wasn't alone," I was blabbering, avoiding the topic, not that it matters. Not really. "How can I help you?" I smiled brightly at him, ready to drop everything just for him. Crazy as it was before the doctor's visit I was going to confess, make my peace with his rejection but now I can't bring myself to even think about it. What if he refused me and found out why I died later? I can't do that to him! 

"Nerd, you know I hate your fake ass smiles," he groaned but he didn't pry. "I saw your interview yesterday and the hag is nagging me trying to figure out if something happened or not." 

"Ah," I couldn't help giggling at that. My innocent interview, so much has changed since then. "Well I was thinking I should put in some effort to find a lover," I averted my gaze. "I'm tired of going home alone and it's not like I had time to date while doing all those extra appearances and everything," I told him the truth. He doesn't need to know that things have changed since then. No. But it should be alright to tell him. "I just want to hold someone in my arms that loves me," I added as an afterthought. 

"So you finally noticed all those girls screaming your name?" He raised an eyebrow at me but I could also see the grimace on his face. 

"Kacchan I'm not deft," I shifted just thinking of all the women that have claimed that I was their babies father only for my lawyers to prosecute them all. No thank you. "I'm gay. I just don't want to be alone anymore." 

I saw the way his head snapped up at that but I couldn't even bring myself to get excited at the possibility of him loving me too. It's pretty much public knowledge that he is with Kirishima and I don't want to get in the middle of their relationship. That would just make me a villain. A nasty one at that. 

As if he knew exactly where my thoughts were going he said, "Shitty Hair cheated on me, I dumped his ass. I mean I get that Icyhot is kind of hot but he should have at least told me that he had feelings for someone else first." My jaw dropped. Kiri cheated on Kacchan! Why? How could he? I guess I was muttering my shocked thoughts because Kacchan chuckled, bringing my attention back again. 

"Yeah, but it was only a matter of time I guess. I wouldn't sleep with him and it's caused a bunch of fights," he groaned sitting in the chair across from me. 

"Kacchan, you've been dating for a couple years now and there was talk of you two moving in together," I almost yelled in my disbelief. I mean, we are 23 and they have been together since highschool. 

"Are you really judging me?" He narrowed his eyes and I shook my head no. 

"No it's just," I paused. What am I supposed to say? I can't tell him I'm happy they aren't together anymore, that's just mean. But I also can't lie and tell him I'm sorry either. "I don't know what to say." 

"Finally said something I believe," I looked at him confused but he didn't explain further. 

"So is that all you're here for?" I asked, already regretting the question but also knowing that I needed the answer. 

"Is sex really that great?" He asked seemingly out of nowhere and I looked at him with wide eyes. 

"Kacchan, I'm a virgin," I said slowly and he nodded as if that made sense. I don't understand but okay then. 

"Do it with me."

"What?" I squeaked looking back at him in shock. 

"Have sex with me. If you're looking to start dating that means you're still single and I'm freshly single so no drama. Fuck me," he shrugged and I looked back at my office door just to see it closed already. He must have closed it on his way in. 

Would this be considered one of the treatments? Or a combination of them? Could I get out of confessing altogether if I do this? How long is he willing to do it with me? 

"I'm not looking for a one night stand," I said slowly, hoping he understood what I meant. 

"So you want something more long term? Then how about a month? If we like it we can extend it but during that one month there can't be anyone else. I don't want another cheater." Why is he so calm about this? I want to cry but at the same time… This is my only real chance of living isn't it? My only chance to be with Kacchan. 

"Three months," I whispered and he looked surprised but quickly smirked. "At least three months or it won't be worth it to me otherwise." I put my foot down. The doctor said that option two would have to be long term, every night… Every night? 

"Every night, I want to be able to hold my lover every single night. Kisses, hugs, sex, I want to be able to whisper sweet words in his ear and feel connected to him. Are you actually going to be okay with that? Are you going to be okay with being my lover?" I can't do it half way, I'm already not confessing and I don't want him to realize that I will be dying without his love. 

"If I'm doing something I won't do it half way, if we do this you will be mine. I will protect you, care for you but most importantly. I will love you," he glared at me before smirking. "And I expect you to do the same." 

"I love you," I whispered. Part of me liked seeing him flush and the small confession but I also know that he doesn't realize that I'm being 100% serious. "I love you, I want to hear you say it too." I leaned forward, my heart pounding in my chest as if trying to escape me but I couldn't run. Not from him. 

I saw him freeze for a second and then his eyes seemed to drill a hole right into my soul, making it hard to breathe. "I love you." There wasn't a doubt in my mind that in this very moment, he means every single word.

I could feel the tightness in my chest fading away but I also know that if I was actually healed I would be coughing up the seed the flowers came from so this must be treatment number two then. 

"Every night," I whispered and I saw him look up a bit confused. "Do you want to come over to my house or should I come to yours? I'll need to pick up some clothes first," I explained and I saw him blush a bright red again. 

"Yours, I have movers coming over tomorrow to pick up my things anyway," he averted his eyes and it's now that I realized that it wasn't just a rumor. He was already living with Kiri, and he still hasn't slept with him? Kacchan seemed to read my mind though. "It didn't feel right with him. I just wanted… something else." 

I didn't push him. I don't have the right, I can ask him later or he'll tell me when he's ready. "How about dinner? We can stop at Julian's, they make the best coconut curry I've ever had," I suggested and I saw the relief flash in his eyes when I didn't push for answers. 

"Sounds good, I'll change and meet you there? I have to go home first, grab some clothes and take a shower," I could still see the blush on his face and I couldn't help the way my heart fluttered in response. I really am doomed to love him, aren't I? 

*** 

Dinner was nice and we were now back at my place. He carried his overnight bag in and I could see him looking around nervously but I also saw him tapping his fingers, one at a time to try and stop himself from setting off an explosion. He really has come a long way to calm himself down so much. 

I poured each of us another glass of wine, now that it has been so long since dinner. We had talked a lot, so long that we ended up ordering dessert just so they wouldn't ask us to leave and, well. There was a lot of wine. We drank our glasses quickly and I cleared my throat before motioning towards the stairs. 

"I'll show you our room," I couldn't help blushing at the words. Our room, how much more intimate could I have possibly said that? Oh, and he noticed. His face was a light pink but he accepted my hand anyway and I led the way to my room. He set his bag down by the bed and sat on the edge before nervously looking back at me. 

"I'm not good at beating around the bush," he blushed brighter and I nodded, waiting for whatever he had to say next. "Kiss me first. Make me believe you love me," his voice was quiet but I stepped forward not able to resist his request. 

"I love you," I whispered, looking into his bright red and vulnerable eyes at the same time. I kissed him. I carefully slid my fingers into his hair so that I could hold him to me. "I love you," I whispered again, letting the words circle in the air with each kiss until it was painful to stand half bent over like this. 

I stood up and took off my shirt before kissing him again and again. Letting myself undress in my excitement but I didn't touch his clothes. He hasn't asked me to and he hasn't made the move to do it himself either. 

He put a hand out and stopped me from climbing into his lap. His face is bright red but he doesn't look angry. 

"Let me," he paused, not knowing how to say what he wanted and I could see the frustration in his eyes. 

""How do you want me? Where?" I motioned towards the bed but I didn't move otherwise. I could almost see his pulse pounding through him and if I spook him it could end everything. 

"On your back, laying on the bed," his eyes lit up, finally having the answers that he needed. As much as I want to hold him and make sweet love to him, I also don't want to push him away in my rush. I laid down just to watch him strip off his clothes. He kneeled down next to the bed and his fingers ran lightly across the skin of my legs before he kissed my knee. "Your legs are so strong," I hardly heard him whisper but I saw him focused on my legs. I couldn't help blushing. He likes my legs? 

His hands felt like heaven, the way he carefully rubbed and massaged my thighs, placing kisses here and there along them. I saw him hesitate and when he noticed that I was waiting for more instructions he let out a small sigh before telling me to turn over. The way he rubbed my legs was nothing compared to how he focused on my butt. What if he wants to top? I'm not ready for that. Why didn't I ever consider him being above me in bed? In every single one of my fantasies he was below me, begging for more, scratching up my back. Every single one. 

"Okay," he said and I felt him get off of me. When I turned to look at him though he was naked and very hard. "Turn back over," he instructed and I did as he wanted. Again he got on his knees but this time his kisses started half way up my thighs. "Tell me if you don't like something," I heard him mumble but his face was relaxed and he just looked so dreamy kissing me, basically worshiping my legs again. 

Note to self, extra leg days. 

Then he kissed my head and he had my focus again. The way his eyes pinned me into place was really no joke. I couldn't move at all and even when he took all of me in and down his throat I couldn't look away, moaning out my pleasure while he watched. It was exciting, it was infuriating, it was amazing. I came. 

He gagged a little bit not expecting the rush already from the amazing head he just gave me but he still swallowed and cleaned me up, preventing me from going soft. When he let me go I sat up and pulled him in for a kiss. Bitter mixed with his sweet taste. I carefully pushed him over and he let me. I pushed my tongue into his mouth, letting myself get excited all over again. He broke away to gasp for air and I gently bit the side of his neck. He released a breathtaking moan that had all of my focus and I licked up the side of his neck. 

"My turn," I whispered in his ear before kissing his earlobe. He was in an almost daze before I made my way to his chest. His amazing sculpted but fleshy pecs. I kissed him by his collarbone, letting my hands dig into the muscle as I slowly circled it. There is a thin layer of sweat but that just made it easier to press my fingers in and feel the muscles under his skin. 

"So amazing," I whispered, focusing on his body before kissing him again. I heard him gasp and glanced up just to see his flushed face so I kissed him again, this time keeping my gaze on his face. Oh, he likes it. He likes it a lot. I kissed his nipple only for his whole body to shudder and he grabbed my attention again with a moan. If he likes it so much I might as well enjoy it. Right? 

I licked and kissed around and on top of the nipple while letting my fingers dig into the tense muscles, even sliding around his sides to find more of the strong flesh on both his sides and his shoulders. It makes sense really, with how strong his explosions can get it makes sense that he would need the strength to control them but still. It is heavenly. I switched sides and when I heard the gasp this time I only lazily opened my eyes to see his red eyes hidden away behind closed eyelids and his face looked like he could barely contain his pleasure. I like this face, I like it a lot. 

I wonder if I did to him what he did to me if it would make him cum too? I let my tongues circle around the nipple before kissing my way down his body and finding his abs to be delicious too. I really could stay here forever just kissing him. He is so amazing. I couldn't hold back anymore though and immediately sucked him into my mouth making him cry out and I sucked harder. Yes, I love when he makes these noises. The whimpers, the begging, the pleading, just the way he crooned my name had my heart pounding. I did what I wanted, going up and down his strong length, swirling my tongue as I went, loving how his back arched off the bed until he nearly screamed. The hot rush of cum coated my tongue; salty but sweet, thick and creamy. 

"Even your taste is amazing," I hummed, kissing up his body, relishing every touch. "Oh, so good. Will you let me kiss you?" I asked and saw him nod his head, tired. His mouth was by far sweeter than his cum but I guess I already knew that. 

"I never want to let you go," I whispered into my kisses and the way he crooned in response made my heart speed up again. The way he arched into each touch made me marvel at how truly beautiful he is. "I love you," I whispered my confession and he pulled me in for a deeper kiss. 

I was forced to pull away, gasping for air but I couldn't stay away from him. I can't not tell him how I feel. 

"Kacchan, I love you," I kissed him again and again, repeating myself, each kiss becoming more and more desperate to taste his love too. 

"I love you," I heard him whisper, his eyes wide and vulnerable before I kissed him again, much slower than before, deeper, more intimate. 

"I want more," I confessed and he smiled. 

"Lube?" The question felt forced, like he didn't really want to bring it up but knew that he needed to. I leaned away for a moment, my bedside table drawer opened and I found the lube and condoms. Hmmm, we probably should use condoms but would that affect me recovering or not? 

"Deku?" I snapped out of my thoughts and smiled back at him. He should wear one to help with cleanup then it could be easier to go again. He hissed at the surprise touch, my fingers quickly rolling the condom on him. 

"Should I wear one too or cum inside of you?" I asked, not able to put the question out of my mind. It's his body, he should choose. Right, he should choose. 

"No, cum inside," he pulled me closer and kissed me. "Become a part of me," his voice growled and there goes my heart, again. I carefully applied the lube, making sure to coat myself liberally after I was done with him and once I was lined up ready to finally push in, I stopped. 

"Are you sure?" I asked, second guessing everything all over again. What if he hates me after the fact? What if he ends up hating it? What if he decides to go back to Kirishima? 

"Yes, I love you," he crooned, my heart swaying at the intimate words while he pulled me in and kissed me. "I love you and only you," he added and I couldn't hold back anymore. I pushed in, feeling the tight, hot pressure of him surrounding me, teasing me, loving me. 

"Aaaahhh!," his voice went surprisingly high but it also seemed to relax at the same time. He kissed me again and I pulled out just to push in a little deeper. His body slowly took me in. 

"Don't stop!" He demanded when I was right at my breaking point. "So fucking close!" His eyes were squeezed shut and I forced a kiss that he immediately returned. "Yes, yes, yes! Yes! Yes!" His voice picked up an octave when I started going faster. I wish I could say I was quiet but I was probably just as loud, just as demanding, just as needy. 

"AAAAAAHHHHHH!" I could feel his nails tearing at my back desperately trying to hold me closer. His head was thrown back before he leaned forward and bit my neck. My hands on his hips pulling him hard and tight against me, I came. I filled him and he screamed out, letting my neck go in the process. I thrusted twice more and only because of the way he was holding me close. Several times his hands slipped and he was clawing at my back and then neither of us could move anymore. Our bodies wrapped tightly around each other. I couldn't pull out of him and he didn't try to stay away. 

He kissed me. His eyes very nearly glazed over, his body sated and content with mine pinning him down. 

"I love you." he smiled up at me and I kissed him again and again, the soft words repeating again and again. Hearing him say those words to me and his eyes were so very clear, he knows exactly who is inside of him. 

"Should we shower now or in the morning?" He chuckled when my kisses turned ticklish and I am still so very hard. He wasn't even a little surprised when I cuddled up from behind him, the water running down our bodies. 

"Just a little more?" I asked kissing his shoulder and I heard him chuckle before telling me to give him everything. For some reason we were even louder in the shower. Maybe it was an echo or maybe it was the extra stimulus from the water sliding down my skin, I really don't know but when he pushed me away just so he could face me, his leg wrapping around my hip I easily lifted him up and thrusted inside, loving how he called out my name. 

"So close," he whimpered, his nails digging into me. The taste of his tongue on mine quickly followed until my release hit me. He let me wash him, his beautiful body now marked from my teeth and nails, I cleaned him out the best that I could just for him to kiss and love me too. It wasn't until we were dressed and in bed, his body curled against mine that I was able to relax. I kissed the back of his neck, whispered that I loved him in his ear and giggled hearing him say the same words back before I closed my eyes and let sleep take me. 

*** 

I woke up exactly the way I fell asleep, holding Kacchan. I reached for my phone to turn off the alarm only to see that it was too early. I had switched shifts with someone yesterday so I needed the early shift but I guess I didn't change my alarms last night. I changed them now and put it back down before cuddling into my lover. 

"Hmmm? Deku? Sleep just a little longer," he yawned before turning to face me, his eyes barely open but he smiled gently at me before cuddling into my chest and seemingly going back to sleep. 

"So amazing," I whispered before kissing the top of his head and then pinching my cheek. Guess it's not a dream, my cheek really stings now. 

When my alarm went off again, this time I had to get up and I guess Kacchan did too. 

"I'll see you at the office," he leaned in and kissed me goodbye, his kiss was slow and unrushed, gentle. I looked up and we went our separate ways. 

The day was pretty slow, nothing extreme happened but that's a good thing and by the time the end of my shift came around I was finishing up my patrol logs and even filling them when Kacchan knocked on my door frame. 

"The movers are asking me where my things are supposed to go, my hag actually told them no even though I already talked to her about this," he fumed and I couldn't help nervously chuckling. 

"Why don't you move in with me? Three months isn't that long and my lease will be ending soon afterwards anyway," I could feel how hot my cheeks were just saying that but still. I didn't take it back. I need him. The disease I have only proves that much, I love him so much that it hurts. 

"Talk about moving fast," he chuckled but he picked his phone back up and I heard him give someone my address. "Now you won't be able to get rid of me," he smirked, coming over and pulling my chair out, he carefully sat in my lap before giving me a kiss. My arms held him safely against me and I returned the kiss. 

"Oh!" I pouted looking up to see who had interrupted us but I could also see Kacchan's glare. Oh. It was Kirishima and Todoroki and no matter how much I wracked my memories I couldn't think of a reason for them to be here. 

"Did you need something?" I asked, still frowning. I know Kacchan closed the door behind him and I didn't expect him to lock it but everyone usually knocks before coming inside unless there is an emergency. It's too calm outside for that to be the case though. 

"I just, I saw Bakubro come in and I just," he couldn't seem to find the words to say. Even now Kacchan was still in my lap, his arms still around my neck from the kiss and now I'm irritated that they are acting all skittish in my office. 

"Our shift ended ten minutes ago," I pointed at the clock to make my point. Kacchan didn't even come inside of my office until our shift was actually over and now that I am pretty much free I just really want to love him. 

"What the fuck do you actually want?" Kacchan basically growled at them and I could easily see the guilt on their faces but I also saw them trying to cover it up. 

"You moved on really fast," Kirishima didn't look back at us and instead kept his eyes on the ground. 

"I caught you in bed with the half and half last week and we broke up. How does it matter to you if or when I moved on?" Kacchan glared at him. Again I saw Kirishima flinch. 

It's only been a week? Well I guess that makes sense, he made himself so vulnerable for me so easily, why didn't I think that was odd? Was the only reason he came to me because he was hurting? No, he did say he was recently single, hell he even told me why. He didn't trick me, I just didn't think about it. Far too concerned with my own issues too really notice. 

"That's not-," 

"I don't have any business with you. If you don't need anything then leave me the hell alone!" Kacchan snapped, cutting Kirishima off. I guess I'm not that nice. 

"If you don't have anything work related could you leave my office now? I don't like the idea of MY boyfriend getting harassed by his ex," I smiled and this time I saw Todoroki flinch too. It hasn't been all that long since he confessed to me and I gently turned him down. Well, at least he didn't seem to care for me as much as he seemed to think that he did. 

"Midoriya," Todoroki started and I let my smile drop completely. 

"I was never yours in the first place. Stop sending things to my address," I cut him off and I saw Kirishima look even more like a kicked puppy and I felt Kacchan flinch in my arms. I guess it wasn't as obvious as Uraraka kept trying to say it was. 

When they finally left my office Kacchan still hadn't relaxed. "You and the half and half?" He asked slowly and I shook my head no. 

"He asked me out and I declined. Nothing more," I tucked a loose lock of hair behind his ear. "I'm in love with you, what else could I have done?" I chuckled a little but he still hugged and kissed me. 

"I'll never leave you," I heard him whisper and I checked to make sure my door was actually shut. Kacchan was crying. 

*** 

Three months, three beautiful months with Kacchan. We went on several dates and even at work it was pretty obvious that our relationship had changed, we didn't fight. Even when we disagree on how to handle something related to work, we just don't fight. The media also noticed that there was a change and it wasn't long before we were ambushed on one of our dates. Of course we knew they were there but we didn't see a need or reason to confront them so long as they left us alone, which they did until Kacchan kissed some ice cream off my cheek. Then they ran up with a million questions and shoving a microphone in our faces. 

"Oi! Rude fucks, leave us the hell alone! We aren't on duty!" There was of course a lot more cursing but he let me pretty easily calm him down which the reporters again exploded with a million more questions. 

"Stop, or I will never accept another interview request for your network again," I said quietly and they froze. I am known for smiling and talking to anyone and everyone. The idea that I would cut an entire network out was impossible but I meant what I said and the fact of the matter is, I know plenty of people's phone numbers to make it happen. I turned back to Kacchan before leading us to the park to enjoy the rest of our date but nothing was that easy. One of the reporters grabbed my arm to stop me and asked another question but I just picked up my phone and called their producer. 

"I will not be appearing tomorrow night for your game show. You should have taught your reporters better. Grabbing me and harassing me while I'm off the clock. I will not be accepting any more requests from your network." I hung up after giving him the names of the handful that I could see the name badges on and shook off the hand that was still grabbing me. 

"Have a nice day," I smiled before taking Kacchan's arm and leading him away just as one of their phones rang. It didn't take him long to start laughing and I swear it's the most beautiful sound in the world. 

"You have another doctor's appointment tomorrow?" He asked after we were just sitting on a park bench and relaxing for a while. "Are you sure you're okay? It's the fourth one this month." 

I chuckled a little at his sweetness. "Yes, actually according to the doctor I'm doing amazing for my-," I stopped. Shit! I haven't told Kacchan about Hanahaki disease or that I've been sick at all. Now he's going to get mad. 

"So you are sick," his shoulders slumped. "How long? Is there anything I can do to help? Why didn't you tell me?" He held my hand gently squeezing it but I could see the hurt in his eyes. I can't lie to him. 

"Hanahaki disease," his head shot up, his eyes wide, easily giving away the fact that he wasn't expecting that at all. "I told you, I loved you Kacchan but you never believed me." I sat back on the bench before leaning on his shoulder. "I love you so much it hurts. I found out the morning you asked me out. How my crush managed to ask me out right after I was told my crush was going to kill me is the kind of luck I'll never understand," I chuckled before looking up into his shining red eyes. 

"I guess I was scared? The idea of telling you hurt because what if you thought that you weren't enough or something?" I paused for a moment before continuing. "We've been together for three months and I still have the disease but my doctor says it's probably because you didn't believe me when I told you I loved you. According to him my disease hasn't progressed at all since he first found it three months ago. So please don't blame yourself. The fact that you have let me love you this whole time has helped me, at the very least it's kept me from getting more sick. By now I was supposed to have lost the ability to feel anything at all but pain." 

"I am the reason for your disease?" He asked and he looked so hurt but when I reached for him he didn't push me away and instead he hugged me. 

"I just couldn't help loving you. You are so amazing," I hummed and he chuckled. 

"I love you too. So much it hurts," he whispered. "Can I go with you? To your appointment?" He asked and I smiled up at him. 

"Yes, of course!" 

*** 

"Mr. Deku, it's good to see you again and this is?" My doctor asked but it would take someone blind to not see the fact that he recognized Kacchan right away. 

"My lover," I answered anyway and I saw Kacchan shift a little uncomfortable with how the doctor was looking at him. 

"Is this to prove your condition to him or..?" He trailed off, unsure what he could say at the moment. 

"He just asked if he could come and I said yes. I've already told him about my diagnosis, you can talk freely with him in the room," I smiled while grabbing Kacchan's hand. He looked relieved at the small gesture and took a half step closer but he didn't let me go either. 

"Very well, let's start with your ct scan from this morning," my doctor held up the file and pulled out some sheets and stuck them to light so we could all see them easier. "As you can see there still isn't any new growth and if you had come in alone today I would have suggested that we reschedule your appointments for once a month for monitoring." 

"But not now?" I asked him a bit confused. 

"Now you've brought your lover. That changes things," he smiled and I couldn't help the shutter that went through me. Why do I feel like an experiment all of a sudden? 

"What the fuck does that mean?" Kacchan glared at the doctor but he was still just smiling. 

"Well it should be obvious. No one has ever been diagnosed and it has not progressed before. Cured sure but once the damage is done there is no reversing it. Once the damage is done you will always feel the crippling pain that comes soon afterwards. And yet," he looked at me again and took his time before saying anything at all. "Here you are. Tell me have you even once taken the pain killers I gave you that first day? Two weeks, that's all it should have taken for you to succumb to the crippling pain. The loss of your emotions. Tell me how do you think those cured feel? After they lose the ability to even be happy and the object of their desire returns their affections? What about those that lost the ability to feel sorrow? How long do you think the ones they loved stayed by their sides? Then there is you." 

"I guess I was just lucky," I looked over at Kacchan who looked at my doctor in shocked horror. Didn't he look into the disease after we talked last night? He said that he wanted to look into something, I just assumed… 

"But Deku is fine. He is healthy," Kacchan tried to argue and the doctor nodded, smiling giddily. 

"But for how long? He hasn't coughed up the seed. The seed of doubt, of loss and of course his willingness to put up with the pain. I've consulted with many doctors on this and they all agree. There are only two reasons we can come up with. The first is as we told you, that he hasn't accepted your confession." He pointed at me still grinning. 

Kacchan made a face that I don't know how to interpret. Why does he look so confused? He turned to me as if he finally understood something though and he looked heartbroken. 

"Kacchan?" I asked nervously but he just hugged me. 

"That's right Mr. Dynamight. I'm fairly sure that you've guessed it but the second reason has nothing to do with you and everything to do with Mr. Deku himself. HE hasn't accepted the fact that YOU love HIM." My doctor started giggling. 

I don't understand. What is he talking about? What does he mean? "Kacchan?" I started to ask but he just gave me a small smile before shaking his head no. 

He turned back to the doctor but he didn't let me go. His arms are so warm. It is very warm. "We are going to go now. We won't be back," I tried to see his face but I couldn't, not with him holding me so tight. 

"I understand Mr. Dynamight. Mr. Deku, thank you for the invaluable research data these last three months. I'm afraid that unless something else happens that we can't learn anything else anyway." 

"I don't understand. What are you talking about? What's going on?" I tried to pull out of Kacchan's arms but he wasn't giving me any room to move without hurting him. I can't hurt him. I just can't. 

Kacchan quickly rushed me out of the office and before I really knew what was going on he was dragging me to U.A. 

"Kacchan? Why are we here? We aren't students anymore," I tried to reason with him but he pulled me with him anyway. 

"Please, trust me. Please at least trust me," he looks so sad. Wait, did I see tears in his eyes? What is going on? What is happening? 

Kacchan quickly brought me to Recovery Girl's office and she looked surprised to see us but that's not exactly right either. 

"What took you so long?" She huffed and I couldn't help looking even more confused. 

"What is going on right now?" I tried to ask but she just whacked me with her cane and I was put on a table and she put some goop on my stomach and my head hurts so much. 

"It's true, he actually has Hanahaki Disease. But," she paused and I looked at her hopefully. 

"But what?" I asked, not able to stand the silence. She looked at me as if studying me. "What?" 

"It's dead," she said flatly. 

"What?" 

"Does that mean what I think it does?" Kacchan interrupted me but she smiled at him. 

"Yes, he is cured. It looks like he didn't cough up the seed because of a side bloom though. Petals that didn't get coughed up," she nodded before turning to her computer. 

"A side bloom?" I am confused. What the hell is a side bloom? 

"A side bloom?" Kacchan looks just as confused. Finally we seem to be on the same page. 

"It's simple. He wants more than what you've already given him," she waved him off but what does that even mean? When we didn't leave her office she let out a groan before turning to face us again. "Bakugo, Midoriya wants more from you. I'm not talking about a piece of paper either. He wants your love but he wants MORE. Do you understand what that means?"

He stayed silent but I just wanted to pull my hair out at this point. "Can you at least tell ME what that means? Am I still sick or not? You said cured, does that mean that we can finally move on with our lives? Why aren't you talking to ME about any of this when it's happening to me?" I want to cry, no I am crying. What is going on? Why won't they tell me? 

"You heard him yourself. He wants to move on with your lives now," she smirked and I couldn't help screaming in my frustration. 

"Nerd," I froze and he pulled me into a hug and kissed me. I couldn't fight it, I didn't want to fight it. His gentle touch, his sweet embrace, his body surrounding mine as he held me close. "You should have told me you wanted to start a family," he smirked and I froze again. 

"What?" I blinked at him. How did he know? But what? Huh? I don't. 

"I love you Deku. I told you, I would give you my everything. Come on I know someone with a quirk," he smiled and kissed me again before pulling me out again. 

I completely missed something didn't I? 

"Oi fucker hurry the fuck up. Use it on me. Yes you heard right," I looked up again to see Kacchan on the phone but he kept pulling me towards a car. 

"I don't fucking care if I'm not married yet, my lover wants it," he turned back looking at me with the most excited smile I have ever seen in my life. "Our apartment in twenty minutes," he hung up and suddenly he was kissing me again. 

"Come on, we have work to do," wow, his smile really is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. 

"Work?" I asked him, hesitating a little. 

"You want us to have a baby right? Would it help for us to have a quicky before he uses his quirk on me?" He didn't seem to actually be paying much attention, lost in his excitement. 

"KACCHAN!" I yelled and he finally stopped and looked at me. "What is going on?" I feel so confused I just want to cry but he looks so happy I can't do that. What if… What if. Why does that question always hurt me so much? 

"Sorry, a lot happened in such a short time," he took a deep breath to calm down and took both of my hands in his. "What did you expect me to do when I found out you want our whole lives together?" 

"Kacchan I don't understand what's going on," I try to stay calm but I could feel myself breaking apart. How could he get so excited? What quirk is he talking about? When has he ever been this excited about anything? The fact I don't understand, does that mean I can't join him? That I can't be a part of his life? 

"Izuku," I jerked, he usually only uses my real name when he is being extra sensitive and that's usually in bed. "Do you want to have a baby? With me? Do you want to marry me and spend our days getting old together?" 

"Yes," the word was barely a breath on the wind but the way he smiled told me he heard it clearly. 

"So do I," he gave me a kiss on the back of my hand. "It's late now, so we'll have to wait on the marriage license until morning but," he stopped for a second and smirked at me. "I know someone with a quirk that can let men get pregnant. We can start on that tonight. What do you have to say about that?" 

"Yes," I whispered and he finally let my hands go and pulled me in for a real kiss. 

"Then let's go home," he carefully played with my hair. 

***

"What do you mean the seed is gone!?! Did you cough it up?" My doctor demanded but I couldn't help laughing at his outburst. Kacchan was less than happy though. 

"WAAAAAHHHHH!" Little Aiko cried, startled from being woken up so suddenly. 

"Come here baby girl, everything's alright now," I played with her, making silly faces. 

"Do you have any idea how long it took me to get her asleep?" Kacchan hissed, he had grabbed the doctor by his collar and if it weren't for the fact that Aiko was already settling down he would have used his quirk by now. 

It's been a year since my last appointment and little Aiko is only a month old but Kacchan demanded that I let him come to see the test for himself. The seed had completely disappeared and in fact there wasn't even a trace of where it used to be. Recovery Girl said it was because my body had simply broken it down and dissolved it now that it had been so long but that was only her theory. 

"It's a good thing you fucking quack! What the hell is your problem?" Kacchan said a lot more colorful things but I wasn't paying much attention at the moment. After all, I have a little princess to protect now and her big red eyes and tufts of green hair were her only real features that could be seen since we had her so bundled up. It is cold outside after all. 

"Deku? It's she alright?" Kacchan's voice sounded nervous and I looked up. 

"Sorry, I was just thinking how happy I am that she got your beautiful eyes," I sighed, turning my attention back to our baby. Her eyes closed while I gently rocked her in my arms. 

"We should go home. She is tired," I looked up to see Kacchan's soft red eyes watching me. He held out his left hand and I saw the ring I found for him. One that could withstand his explosions and just like he promised he never took it off. I took his hand and he helped me up. I wonder how long before I can convince him to have another baby? 

You're mumbling Deku," Kacchan chuckled but he hugged me anyway. "Let's wait until she is weaned from breast milk before we start talking about more," he chuckled before guiding me out of the office and towards our home. 

"Mmm, I can't wait," I hummed only to see his ears turn a bright red. 

"I'm texting the fucker with the quirk now," he hissed, the fact that he wasn't fighting me on it at all only told me that he wanted more too. 

"How many kids do you want?" I asked quietly, making sure not to wake up Aiko. 

"Four, maybe five?" He paused as if questioning it before he shook his head. "A lot. I want a big family," I smiled up at him. 

"Me too," I whispered before giving him a kiss on the cheek. I saw his blush deepen as he gently led me home. The fact that he was the one that carried our bundle of joy wasn't a secret, even the public knew but his protectiveness is just one of the many reasons I love him so much. 

"Let's have another baby then if you feel like that," Kacchan interrupted my thoughts but the fact that he was so red only warmed my heart. 

"Yes." 

End.