Chapter One – Earthland Survival Guide
0.0
Naruto grimaced as he registered the fact that he was free-falling from the sky... head first.
Yet, he was strangely calm.
He flexed his fingers, surprised that he had recovered so much in such a short period of time. He would need it for the coming confrontation with Akatsuki—wherever this place was. Right now, getting soaked in this torrential rainfall was the least of his problems. He shifted his body, allowing gravity to do the rest as he righted himself in mid-air. A small cloud of dust covered his landing, flinging stray fragments of earth away from the epicentre.
"Scatter."
From the cover of the resultant shroud, five copies emerged from the centre of the large depression, each heading towards a different section of the forest they were currently in. The original himself was sprinting towards the north-east.
Naruto knew that such a ploy wouldn't faze his enemies for long, but it would buy him the precious seconds that could spell the difference between life and death. It was vexing, but he had to reason with himself that even in his current state, he would be unable to best the shadowy organisation—something that even his village had trouble dealing with—on his own. Besides, he had to stick to his superior's orders: retreat and open a line of communication to the village.
The sooner, the better.
However, despite running for his life from enemies who had yet to reveal themselves, Naruto couldn't help but feel energised in these new surroundings. He assumed that he had been teleported to a forest somewhere within the borders of Ame no Kuni, recalling the knowledge Jiraiya-shishou had pounded into his head during the training trip. It made sense after all; what with the rain and everything.
Was this where their headquarters was? It was the only logical explanation he could think of.
That was why he felt so confused when none of the clones he had used for decoys had been destroyed. Naruto guessed that he had been running close to ten to twenty minutes. So, where were they? Was this supposed to be some kind of demented mind game? He resisted the urge to shout at his enemies, even willing to incur the risk of using Senjutsu. Sadly, his impulsive side won out.
"Akatsuki!" the blond screamed to the heavens.
Despite not being a properly classified S-Class nin, Naruto Uzumaki was not someone to be taken lightly, damn it!
Summoning a clone, he ordered his copy to enter Sage Mode whereas he would act as a lookout. The clone nodded before closing his eyes as he prepared the process of infusing the natural energy in the surroundings with his chakra. Naruto bit the inside of his cheek. He knew it was a risk given the time it took, but whatever Akatsuki had planned for him wouldn't be solved by him running away. At least in Sage Mode, he would be prepared for the coming ambush.
"Boss!"
Naruto tsked in annoyance, thinking that his copy must have screwed up or something, but he was left dumbfounded as he witnessed a pair of yellow irises staring back at him. He leaned back in shock.
The clone seemed to share his sentiments, staring at his own hands in awe.
"Th-This is... impossible."
A process which normally should have taken minutes at a time was completed within one, maybe even less than that. He glared at his clone, as if he had somehow cheated the natural order of things.
"What did you do?"
His copy shrugged. He placed a hand on his chin and looked contemplative. "I don't know, but the air around here feels different. Kinda... weird, but like the good kind of weird."
Not wanting to stray away from more pressing concern, Naruto gave him a firm nod. There was always time to debate the quality of natural energy in the area later.
"Right, c'mon. Give it over," he said.
"Eh? I got more stuff to say!"
"Asshole, now listen here—"
"Idiot, you're just calling yourself names. I'm your clone."
Naruto couldn't suppress the twitch in his eye as he glared at his clone. Honestly, he could be such a bastard sometimes. His words were slightly incoherent as he gritted his teeth to force himself from lashing out:
"What—" his voice strained, "—do you want?"
"What if it's not Akatsuki?"
"Of course it's them! It's always those bastards! Kakashi-sensei said—"
"Sensei said that it could be Akatsuki," the clone said, emphasising the 'could' with rabbit ears. "C'mon, it's not like you haven't considered it. I know you've been thinking about it."
"We still have to—"
Yet again, the original was interrupted. This time, it was from the new information that flooded his memories from one of his clones that had just dispelled himself.
"What the—"
0.0
Clone Four, recently created, only had a few moments to blink before the boss ordered them to scatter. At an improbability factor of seven million, eight hundred and thirty six thousand, four hundred and ninety two to one against, he was an oddity among the rest of the Kage Bunshin. He could only be described as the next step of evolution if possible, being more sentient and self-aware than the rest of his brethren.
So with his new orders, he had very little time to come to terms with his new identity. As he carried out his boss's orders to run towards the west, a million thoughts raced through his mind.
What just happened?
How in the world was I created?
What's my purpose in life?
Is it to carry out the orders of the Boss? Why am I calling him Boss?
Wait, calm down, calm down... what's my name? Naruto? It doesn't feel right. Why doesn't it feel right?
Oh, I know.
I'll call myself 'Ruto'.
The newly proclaimed Ruto stared blankly at his hands as a frightening conclusion dawned on him. It was the circumstances behind the fragility of his being—the fate of a simple clone. He balled his fingers tight, unable to come to grips with the sword hanging over his neck.
I'm a clone, a simple clone. In the end, my fate is to perish—disappear like the rest of them. But why?
He continued with this train of thought for the next ten minutes or so as he traversed from one tree branch to another. As it turned out, Ruto was reaching the edge of the forest, judging from amount of light seeping in. He stopped. After all, the Creator (which was what he referred to the Boss now) had only ordered them to scatter, so he was uncertain on how to proceed.
Should he press on or remain within the shadows of the forest?
Ruto shrugged, having a death sentence hanging over one's head always lowered one's inhibitions.
Cautiously, he stalked forward, his eyes peeling in every direction for any sudden movements in the vicinity, as he stepped out of the border that separated the forest and the outside world. He was, of course, noticeably shocked to discover a village just beyond the short cliff he was now standing on.
For a moment, he wondered if he had stumbled upon Amegakure, but quickly dismissed that notion. Perhaps he had just stumbled upon one of the smaller surrounding villages scattered around the countryside. However, it was the peculiar architecture of this village that drew his curiosity. Even in his travels across the Elemental Nations, the buildings had stuck to the traditional design he was so familiar with back home.
Maybe it was just in Ame no Kuni.
Still, entering a foreign village possibly filled with hostiles was a recipe for disaster, even with the potential benefit of gathering information on his whereabouts.
What would his late Master do?
He sighed.
Within moments, a small cloud encompassed his person, and a nondescript brown-haired teenager occupied the space Ruto had been standing in. The clone settled on a walking pace as he trekked towards the village, trying his best not to draw attention to himself in case an outbound Rain-nin discovered his intrusion. As he neared the village, a rather odd sign caught his attention.
'Welcome to Camoa'
Only, he couldn't make heads or tails of the gibberish engraved on the sign. He tilted his head in confusion. He could recognise the letters individually, but the writing was something he was not familiar with. Jiraiya-shishou never mentioned anything about the nation using another language. Neither did he get that foreign vibe from Pain and Konan.
Was he even in Ame no Kuni?
It was either that or the village employed some sort of wide-scale coded script to disorientate intruders. Though, this did make more sense than some of the other ludicrous ideas buzzing in his head.
Confused, the disguised clone examined the village, quietly noting that the town was near desolate. If not for a woman dashing across the street, shielding her head as the rain pelted her, he could have mistaken it to be abandoned. Wooden panels were haphazardly nailed down on the houses that he could see, covering the fragile windows underneath them. Smoke could be seen drifting upwards to the sky, coming from an odd opening from a narrow rectangular-like structure. He would have thought that the building was on fire if not for the fact that similar scenes could be seen across the small village.
"Son o' a—" a gruff voice exclaimed.
A figure could be seen hunching over the wheel of a carriage on the other end of a long cobbled street. It was only by his sharp hearing that he was able to catch the brief curse that escaped the man's lips. Seeing no one else in the vicinity, Ruto approached the stranger.
Inwardly, he hoped that the man could understand him.
"Uh, mister... Do you know where we are?"
"Yea," the balding man said. "I'm out here stuck in the damn downpour, while mah carriage is caught in a freaking pothole! And some no good punk is tryin' to be sarcastic and wha' not!"
Ruto couldn't help but sigh in relief. "Uh hey, you want me to help you with that?"
The carriage driver stopped fiddling with the stuck wheel and glared at him. "No! What I want is for ya to shut yer trap, ya dumb brat!"
Ruto sighed, quenching the small bubble of irritation at the snide remark. Deciding that words would only serve to aggravate him further, he manoeuvred around the stranger, putting one hand on the under-side of the carriage and effortlessly lifted it out of the deep pothole. The large carriage shook a little as Ruto deposited it back on even ground.
The old man gaped at the incredible feat of strength.
"Well, I'll be..."
The next thing he knew, he was being pulled into a one-armed bear hug. The driver was laughing and rambling about how the clone had saved him in time to deliver his shipments to the local merchants. Ruto was glad that he hadn't been destroyed lest he failed to acquire information for the Creator.
"Yer some kinda mage, lad? Yer must be a mage, what with yer fancy-looking clothes and what not."
Ruto glanced down at his well-worn orange and black tracksuit.
Honestly? Fancy-looking?
"We don' get a lot o' yer kind in these parts, ya know? What with Camoa being a pretty small town. Why, we don' even have a lot of jobs to do 'round here," the man trailed off again, stroking his chin. "Although..."
"Camoa? We're in Camoa? Is that somewhere nearAmegakure?"
"Ama-what-now?" The stranger looked at him, askance. "Yer must have been pretty far out there, huh? Listen, yer in Fiore now. Fi-O-Re." He paused, his gaze now wary. "Though it's mighty odd that ya don't even know the name of the kingdom yer in."
"Fiore," Ruto said, testing the words aloud. It didn't sound familiar. Besides, why was the strange man calling him a mage? "Is that near Hi no Kuni by any chance? I'm trying to find a way back to Konoha."
"What did I just say, brat? Yer in the Kingdom of Fiore! None of that nonsense yer been spouting off. Never even heard o' no Hi-No-Ku-Ni to begin with. It sounds weird. Tha' in the Pegrande Kingdom or something?"
"Konoha!" Ruto almost screamed, grabbing the larger man by the arms tightly. "How could you not know what Konoha is?"
The driver winced from the pressure.
"Listen," he wheezed. "I ain't n-never heard or know what th-that 'Koh-No-Hah' stuff means, a'ight? But ya mind lettin' go of mah arms? Please...?"
Ruto blinked, snapping out of his sudden bout of insanity. His hands were trembling as he released the man. He hadn't meant to do that. For a moment, he was about to let his emotions get the better of him. In that instant, his strength left him as he processed what the man had said, slumping to the ground in dejection.
Where the hell was he?
Gulping, the driver patted him on his shoulders. "Ar-Are yer a'ight, lad?" When Ruto didn't give him a response, he sighed. "Listen, I got a kid 'round yer age, and I... Dammit! I'm no good with this kind o' stuff. That's why I became a farmer, ya see," he said, chuckling. "Noww, I don' know how I can help ya, but if yer need Jewels, our town's been having some problems with this lil' critter that's been terrorising our crops. The monster's not terribly difficult, but we've been having some trouble sending a mission request out to the nearby guild. The good thing is that the pay is half-decent."
"Jewels?" Ruto made a face, confused. "What am I going to do with Jewels?"
The man looked flabbergasted and frowned down at him. "It's still money, ain' it? At the very least, it'll help tide you over—get some hot food in yer belly, a roof over yer head, and a warm bed. Don' be too down. I bet yer find your way back to your uh, Koh-No-Hah some day." He winced suddenly, fiddling with his straw hat. "Listen, I have a schedule I have to keep to. Like I said, if yer interested in the mission, ya could just head on over to the bar down the street and ask for Martha at the counter. She's a sweetheart, one of the kindest souls in our little town. She'll fill ya in on the rest."
The man stood up and walked over to his carriage, preparing the mule as he climbed aboard the driver's seat. "I'm really sorry that I couldn' do anything more," the man told him. "Mah name's Sam. If ya ever need anything, just ask around Camoa for me. The townsfolk'll point ya in the right direction."
Sam offered him a nod, pulling away. "Best ya get out o' the rain now. Be seeing ya 'round." The carriage moved forward at a snail's pace, but Sam staunchly kept his gaze in front, not once turning back to Ruto.
The clone couldn't help but laugh as Sam rode away on his carriage. The farmer didn't want anything to do with him at the end. Why would he even want to in the first place? What he hoped to be a simple reconnaissance mission had been shot to hell.
What did that strange technique do to him? Was he even in the Elemental Nations anymore?
No, no, it was impossible. If he could just ask someone—anyone else—they would have heard of Konoha.
His village. His home.
Now was not the time to panic.
Slowly, he pulled up to a crouch before righting himself. He had to relay this new found information to the Creator; only he would be the one to decide on the next course of action. Ruto rushed towards an abandoned alley just off to the side of the main street, inwardly prepared to give his life for the sake of the mission. Leaning against the side of the building, he took a final glance upwards, closing his eyes as he allowed the cleansing rain to wash over him. He felt oddly peaceful despite his short existence in this world.
Even as a clone, he felt curious as to what was waiting for him on the other side of the technique. Taking a deep breath, he reached into himself, feeling a deep tug pulling at the centre of his chest. Within moments, everything as he knew it ended.
A small puff of smoke was left in his wake before it too dissipated into the atmosphere; his legacy now nothing more than memories.
0.0
The first time Naruto experienced such a massive overload of information was when he was training to develop his wind nature with Kakashi and Yamato-sensei. He regained consciousness ten minutes later only to come face-to-face with Yamato's patented 'ghoul-eyes' technique, which admittedly freaked him out enough to knock him out again.
They said he was out for another five whole minutes.
That was why he found it odd as he tried to filter the large load of information from a single clone. He blinked as his brain finally caught up, reliving the events that had just conspired from his clone. Never had his clones ever acted in such a manner before, prompting him to utter out:
"—the hell..."
His copy looked on in worry as he wavered on his feet. "Boss, you all right?"
"I'm fine," Naruto said. "There's a village near here. We might be able to learn more about our situation there. It doesn't look like there's trouble at the moment, but it's better to err on the safe side," he trailed off, hoping his counterpart would get the hint.
His clone nodded before shortly disappearing in a puff of smoke.
Feeling the familiar surge in strength, Naruto sighed in relief. Apparently, his clone was right. There was something off about the surroundings around these parts. It was as if there was an over-abundance of natural energy in the air. Even he couldn't come up with a plausible theory for the strange phenomenon.
He sighed.
As much as he wanted to examine the village for himself, the words of Kakashi-sensei echoed in his mind. Breathing deeply, he willed the natural energy in the air to reach outwards, trying to sense any chakra sources in the vicinity. Once he was absolutely certain that there was no one in the immediate area, he brought his hand up to his mouth, biting his thumb as he had done so hundreds of times before. His hands flashed through the familiar seals before spreading the wound across the ground in front of him.
"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!"
His chest swelled up with hope as he stepped back, expecting to see the familiar face of one of the smaller messenger toads. As the cloud of smoke dissipated, his hope turned to confusion. Nothing had been summoned.
"What...?"
He must have screwed up the summoning process. Replicating the hand seals—only slower this time—Naruto tried once more, only to reach the same conclusion. His breath laboured as he repeated the process again.
"Gamakichi!" ...and again.
"Gamatatsu!" ...and again.
"Ji-san Sennin!" he screamed.
Naruto pulled back, dropping to the ground unceremoniously. "Wh-What's going on? Why can't I summon them?"
It couldn't be. It just couldn't.
He remembered Kakashi-sensei's words; remembered what he had been ordered to do. But what now? Nothing worked. He couldn't find his way back or get in touch with his village. All hopes of a speedy return were dashed. Here he was stuck in some foreign land, a land where no one had heard of Konoha, maybe even the other nations for all he knew.
Even if he tried to deny it, it made sense. There were just too many signs to ignore. He wasn't in Ame no Kuni for sure. How else could someone have not heard of Konoha, one of the superpowers of the continent? He was sure that there was too much history between the two villages back during the Second World War to simply not know of its existence.
Then, there was the contrasting natural energy in the surroundings. His ability to slip into Sage Mode was seamless here. It had never happened before, unless he had developed tremendous control over his chakra overnight. Neither did that explain his inability to summon. To think that somehow he had regressed to the point when he first started training to summon the toads contradicted his earlier theory.
So how the hell was he going to get home?
There was no way he could afford to remain here indefinitely, stuck in another dimension. He had return to Konoha. There were just too many unanswered questions burning a hole in his mind right now.
How was the village holding up in the aftermath?
When he first arrived to fight Pain, seeing the massive crater that had originally been part of the sprawling residential district had left him a little more than just sick. Naruto felt queasy just thinking about it now.
What about his friends? The people he cared about? People back home who were depending on him...
Was he ever going to see them again?
Too absorbed in his thoughts, Naruto didn't realise that he had begun pacing back and forth. Clutching his head in frustration, he balled his fists tight enough to draw blood. The anger didn't subside. He was angry; angry with himself and angry with the circumstances that led him here.
A leaf drifted down from his blind spot and he just reacted instinctively. His fist splintered wood. Naruto wasn't even sure what had happened when the tree before him suddenly came crashing down.
For a moment, the anger waned. A brief moment of clarity came upon him.
It felt good to have a release.
Naruto didn't stop himself as he shifted his feet and jumped, allowing his body to twist in mid-air as he brought his foot down diagonally and slammed it against the thick trunk of another tree that stood in his way.
Forming a Rasenrengan, he surged forward, thrusting his arms out on the falling tree. The wood crumbled under the vortex of the twin chakra spheres, effortlessly snapping the tall tree in half. Naruto rolled into a crouch, righting himself as he cocked his arm back and punched the ground hard enough for the impact to cause a fissure to separate the earth. The forcefulness behind the blow uprooted the row of trees on the other end of the clearing.
Unknown to Naruto, his eyes, normally a pair of yellow irises with horizontal bar-like pupils, gained a small vertical slit; a trait similar to his Jinchuuriki transformation.
Two clones appeared beside him. Holding his right arm back, he allowed the clones to begin shaping the chakra and absorbing the wind manipulation of the Rasenshuriken. Their hands were shifting back and forth as they worked to complete the complex technique.
A sudden gust of wind whipped across the clearing as he held the Rasenshuriken above him.
The chakra sphere pulsed and throbbed with unholy intensity as it absorbed the wind to fuel its potency and size. The large bladed ring around the sphere began to accelerate in its rotation; so fast that only the after-image could be seen. With a loud cry, he hurled the shuriken-like sphere at the mass of trees.
The moment Naruto let go, he instantly regretted it.
The built-up anger and frustration immediately drained from his body, leaving him hollow and exhausted.
The Rasenshuriken flew across the clearing, taking a fraction of a second to reach its target. A sharp, grinding noise accompanied the screech the technique emitted as it cut through the forest, felling tree after tree in its wake like a hot knife through butter.
After all, the Rasenshuriken didn't merely cut, it decimated on a cellular level. As the attack continued its path of destruction across the forest—sparing nothing in its path—the sphere suddenly expanded, encompassing a wide radius as it exploded outwards. The microscopic wind blades penetrated the ground, pulverizing the earth before leaving a large crater in its wake. The resulting shock wave sent fragments of bark, stone and earth into the air before the technique subsided.
The blond had his hands on his knees, panting as he greedily sucked in huge breaths of air. Beads of sweat started to trickle down his forehead, but he kept his eyes on the ground. He was afraid and equally ashamed to look at the destruction caused as a result of his sudden outburst.
How could he have lost control like that again?
After all he had gone through, he didn't want a repeat of what had happened in his previous battle. Naruto shuddered at the thought. His father wouldn't be there to correct his mistake the next time round.
The huge plume of smoke had finally settled. Risking a look, he couldn't help but feel disgusted with himself as he took in his handiwork. Large patches of the forest had been destroyed, leaving behind a chaotic mess of the remains as the felled trees were strewn across the large area of destruction. Noticeably, the crater, a few hundred metres deep as well as wide, left an ugly stain on the earth. He swallowed uneasily. It reminded him of what Pain had done to Konoha except on a smaller scale.
His home.
Despite all the anger having been drained out of his body, Naruto chastised himself; he couldn't dwell on the impossible right now. He had to stay focused. People were bound to investigate the destruction of the forest. He was reasonably sure that the villagers could have seen and heard the explosion from the nearby village of Camoa.
He had to lay low for the time being.
0.0
Surviving in the woods was second nature to him. After all, it was insulting for a shinobi from Konoha not to. It helped that he lived in a similar nomadic fashion when travelling with his late Master. It was only on the rare occasion that the Sannin would splurge to stay at a comfortable inn. For all his wealth, Jiraiya was a stingy man.
It had been almost two days since his outburst; two depressingly long days, as he tried to sort out what he knew about his current situation.
Honestly, he was wary of this new 'world'. Who wouldn't be? No one had heard of Konoha or the Elemental Nations before, and despite speaking the same language, this land employed a rather odd style of writing. Also, from what little he understood, people like him were called 'mages' here.
Magic... People used magic here.
God, that sounded stupid.
Then, there was the fact that he had almost next to nothing except for the clothes on his back and the few odds and ends he had packed into a small sealing scroll that he kept inside his jacket. He whacked himself on the head for how ill-prepared he was. Inside the sealing scroll were three extra kunai, a spare change of boxer shorts, his wallet Gama-chan and a spare copy of his Master's first book.
To be fair, he was in a rush to get back to Konoha. As a result, he just grabbed whatever stuff that was within his immediate reach.
As the blond stepped out of the forest, he shielded his eyes from the sun's glare. He was taking a large risk in visiting Camoa despite it having only been two days. The matter wouldn't have blown over yet, but he needed to know more about the area, seeing that he wasn't really sure what else he could do.
He needed money, information and from his experience, a really smart adult—one that was preferably old.
Old people were always wise.
Naruto was only wearing his black under-shirt; his jacket now tied around his waist. He just hoped that no one would recognise the clothes that his disguised clone had worn just two days prior. Never in his life had he cursed the attention-grabbing colour that was orange.
As he neared the outskirts of Camoa, he realised that the small town was a totally different place compared to the last time his clone had visited it.
People were out and about. Merchants were hawking their wares to passers-by and children were playing freely out on the streets as they enjoyed the warm, balmy day. He couldn't help but smile as nostalgia tinted his memories. In some ways, this town reminded him of Konoha back when he was younger.
He walked towards the bar the farmer had previously mentioned to him, exchanging polite smiles and nods to the townsfolk that greeted him.
He really did look out of place here.
When Naruto reached the bar, he glanced at the sign board above the entrance and resisted the urge to sigh at the foreign words. Living in this world was not going to be easy. Entering, Naruto immediately noted that he had grabbed the attention of all the occupants in the room—all five of them. After all, who would drink so early in the morning?
The answer was three, sadly.
The establishment itself was not something that one would call large, but it was comfortably spacious. It was well-kept and clean; a sharp contrast to those sleazy joints that Jiraiya-shishou would frequent. He made a beeline for the counter.
"Uh, I'm looking for Martha-san," Naruto said.
The brunette behind the bar smiled, her brown eyes crinkling in amusement as she regarded him. She reached around her neck to untie the worn and grimy apron before balling the garment up and chucking it under the counter for good measure. Her matching set of a pin-striped long-sleeve top and black pants were immaculately clean, which was surprising, considering the state of her apron.
"I'm right here hun, and please—" she lowered her voice into a throaty whisper, "—call me Martha."
Naruto was glad that he had been able to keep his features neutral, despite his racing heart. Such a thing could have been taken directly from his Master's perverted books. Surreptitiously, he took a step back.
"So how can I help you?" Martha asked.
"Someone pointed out to me that you had a 'mission' available?"
Martha pushed the fringe of her short cropped hair back as she eyed him, taking an unnecessarily long look at his body. "You a mage or something? Wouldn't want something as cute as you to be all cut up now, do we?"
He felt his cheeks heat up. Never in his life had he ever met anyone so forward unless he counted Anko, or that enemy-nin that kept trying to kiss him for that matter. To be fair, one was a sadistic shinobi with a passion for dango, and the other was trying to suck out his chakra.
"I can handle myself just fine," Naruto said.
"Okay, okay. No need to get all worked up over it," she said, lifting her hands up in a placating manner. The woman reached under the counter and pulled out a sheet of paper, presenting it to him. "This must be the one you're looking for."
Naruto warily took the offered piece of paper. To his dismay, he couldn't understand a single word on it except for the numbers that were printed out in bold, which he guessed was the mission reward.
One hundred thousand Jewels.
It sounded like a considerable sum of money, but for all he knew, a hundred thousand was chicken scraps around these parts. Naruto brought the paper close to him, squinting his eyes as he examined it. He was sort of glad that the woman interrupted him—glad and ashamed, to be honest.
"Can't read?"
"What? Of course I can read! It's just that the lighting in here is terrible and I—uh, I lost my glasses yesterday..." He levelled a half-hearted glare at the older woman.
"All right. There's a monster terrorising the farms surrounding our town. It's nothing serious; it's just been eating the crops and annoying the farmers to high hell. The request was supposed to be sent over to Mermaid's Cove." Noticing his confusion, she continued, "That's the closest guild to Camoa but," she stopped once more, eyeing the establishment as she beckoned Naruto to come closer. "Our sweet old mayor had a little spat with the Guild Mistress." Martha winked, placing her finger on her lips. "If anyone asks, you didn't hear that from me, mm'kay?"
"A guild? What's that?"
Martha looked at him in exasperation. "Dumb and illiterate? Hun, you should really thank your parents because you being cute is the only good thing you got going on in you life. Wa-Wait... you honestly don't know what a guild is?"
"Nope," he told her, frowning.
The older woman put a hand on her chin, leaning it against the counter as she eyed him with a tired smile. "What's your name?"
"Naruto Uzumaki."
"Maybe you should sit this one out, Naruto. I don't think you're ready for such a mission just yet," Martha said, trying to snatch the request from his hands.
Naruto, however, proved to be quicker, as he held the paper in the air, away from her reach. "I can do it, I can totally do it!"
Still, he was unnerved that there was some kind of monster on the loose. How screwed up was this world? Now, he really wanted to go back to Konoha. At least back home, there weren't any monsters—
Oh, right.
Those guys...
Well, either way, he really wanted to go home. At least by doing the mission, he'd be able to get some real food and a roof over his head. It was almost three days since he had a proper shower or even washed his clothes.
"You're not from around here, are you?"
"Fiore?" Naruto asked, remembering what Sam, the surly farmer, had told him before.
Martha smiled, saying, "Right, hun. I think I know your kind all too well." She turned back and whipped up a drink from one of the lesser used tabs; there was an actual coat of dust lining the top of it. She placed it at the counter in front of him. "Why don't you take a seat? You look tired. We wouldn't want you to drop dead before you even start the job."
Naruto took a seat, warily eyeing the glass in front of him. "Uhm, I don't really drin—" he started, only to be rapped on the forehead by the bartender, who was looking uncharacteristically serious.
"You should never, ever drink before a job. Do you hear me, Naruto?" Martha didn't raise her voice, but she was clearly holding back from showing her ire. "That's just pumpkin juice."
Naruto kept his head bowed, looking staunchly at the mug. It didn't take much to realise that there was a back-story to it. His words must have brought back unpleasant memories in the woman's life. He really was grateful for her kindness; the first person to do so ever since he arrived here, in fact.
"Is that so?" Naruto mustered false cheer in his voice. "Thanks!" he said, downing the whole glass in a single shot. It wasn't an exaggeration, he was genuinely dehydrated.
"My, my, aren't we thirsty now? Maybe I should cook you a little something too..."
"You don't have to," Naruto said, hating himself for what he was about to do to his stomach. "I'm not really hungry."
"Not a lot of people would give up a free meal, but if you insist," she said.
A free meal.
He blinked, cheeks colouring. "Uh, well, if you're already going to, I shouldn't stop you."
Laughing, Martha patted him on the cheeks, feeling the indentations the whiskers left on his skin. Naruto had never met someone like her, to be so forward when they first met just a few minutes ago, but he chose not to stop her. It felt nice. She then motioned for him to follow her to the back room, leaving her assistant, Ross, to tend to the counter.
Naruto looked around the bar, noting that most of her patrons had their heads in their hands as they leaned against the table.
Nah.
None these drunks would make a ruckus so early in the day.
Over the course of the next half-hour, Martha began to explain to him the workings of the country as she prepared a simple dish: from the vague history behind the continent of Ishgar's Magic Council to the purpose of guilds. Naruto, for his part, listened with rapt attention. This was useful information. He'd be able to blend into this world better, but there was still one thing bothering him.
"Have you ever heard of a place called the Elemental Nations?" he asked.
"Can't say that I have, Naruto. I've been in Fiore since I was born; never once stepped outside of the kingdom before. Is that where you're from?"
Despite trying to come to the same conclusion in his two days in the forest, the confirmation shook him.
"Yeah, I uh, live in a place called Konoha..."
Stirring the wok with the spatula in her hand, Martha turned to him with a small smile. "Sounds like a beautiful place. I bet a vacation there sounds nice. I guess I'll have a tour guide if I ever visit, huh?"
Naruto smiled, maybe a bit forcefully. He cleared his throat after a lengthy pause.
"Yeah, definitely."
If Martha found his behaviour odd, she didn't say anything about it. He was just glad she didn't choose to pry.
0.0
Safe within the shadows of the forest near the town of Camoa, Naruto scoffed. Honestly, a tomato monster? These people were scared of a little tomato?
After a hearty meal courtesy of Martha, he immediately set off to find the mark which the townsfolk had aptly named the 'Rogue Tomato'. While not particularly dangerous, some of the farmers noted that the little bugger was fast, and was inclined to go for the same genus as the monster itself, zipping straight past the zucchinis and carrots and going straight for the tomatoes.
A monster that ate its own kind.
Weird.
The mark was often sighted heading back into the forest after its little snack run, which was what brought him back to the forest, though a different section than the one he had been in previously. None of the townsfolk were willing to dispose of the monster themselves. Luckily, it meant that he would get a decent reward for a mission that sounded like a walk in a park. Locking his hands in a familiar seal, three clones sprung up around him.
"There are three farms around surrounding Camoa. The tomato monster—" they all broke off into bubbling fits of laughter. "Eh, but seriously, I want the three of you to guard the crops, hidden, mind you, and when it appears, you know what we have to do, right?"
"Right, boss!" the clones cheered, echoing each other.
In the blink of an eye, they scattered, each heading towards a different direction.
Naruto smiled, even if he was in a totally different land, he couldn't contain his excitement when a mission came up, no matter how illogical it sounded. Punching a fist into the other, the original cracked his knuckles in anticipation.
"Let's do this!"
Of course, it was almost nine hours later when he was jerked wide awake from his nap. He was never good at just waiting around. Naruto jumped to his feet as he absorbed the information from his recently-dispelled clone.
Finally, some action.
He sprinted towards the east where the mark had last been spotted by his clone, cursing the timing of the 'attack' as he noticed the sky above him darkening. He had to act fast before night fell for fear that the monster would elude him in the shadows of the night.
A faint but incredibly creepy chittering sound caught his attention and he immediately stilled, ducking into a low crouch on the undergrowth of the forest floor. Could that have been the tomato monster?
Nobody mentioned anything about that unearthly sound.
His eyes suddenly picked up on a shadow—the figure reaching barely below his knees, running as fast as its stubby legs could carry it. Suddenly, it stopped, tilting its head up as if testing the air. It turned and edged closer to his position as if sensing his presence; both combatants trying to gauge the other. It finally stepped forward from the shadows of the forest into the dim, fading sunlight.
Naruto struggled not to scream.
The runt-size monster looked similar to that of a plushy doll. Horizontal white and purple stripes adorned its body which was totally disproportionate to the rest of its appendages. However, what was most striking was its large head, roughly the size of his own if not bigger. The little bugger had no eyes nor did it have any noticeable nose. The only similar features it had to a tomato was the fact that it was red and had a green stalk atop its head. If possible, its large mouth widened, enhancing its creepy smile. Saliva slopped down its large, protruding fangs as it stalked forward, chittering menacingly.
It acted like it could smell the fear on the young shinobi.
"Chichichichichichichi..."
Discreetly, Naruto tried to reach for his pouch, hoping to pull a sneak attack on the monstrosity that was formerly a tomato, or a tomato that was formerly a monstrosity—either one. Grasping three shuriken in his hand, he moved.
"Die, you monstrosity!"
The shuriken flew in an arc, each targeting a different part of the target. However, the monster seemed prepared, its stubby legs bent and tensed as it waited for the projectiles to come closer. Its body was surprisingly agile—a trait that belayed its short and stubby stature—as it dodged the thrown shuriken, twisting and twirling like it was a game. Instead of pressing with an attack like Naruto expected, it did the opposite, turning around and fleeing deeper into the woods.
"Coward!" the blond roared, immediately on its tail as his hands locked into seals. "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"
Twelve clones popped into existence around him as they simultaneously rushed the tomato. Capturing the little bugger proved to be harder than he thought. One of his clones managed to get in front of it, wielding a kunai in his hand while the others branched out, surrounding the monster. His lead clone acted, swiping low at the tomato with a horizontal strike. Surprisingly, it jumped above the blow; well above what he thought possible as it landed on the clone's arm. Using the arm as a springboard, it tucked its head into its body and launched itself at the clone's face.
His clone vanished in a cloud of smoke.
The small clearing was eerily silent as the others contemplated what just happened. The tomato ended up landing on its posterior, and rather comically, it struggled to get up before meandering around like a drunk, clutching its abnormally large tomato head in agony.
"Chi... Chichichi..."
The tomato was slurring its words. That, or it was mocking him. Naruto would have found the actions to be cute, in a way if not for the fact that it was a tomato monster.
"Bastard tomato! You'll pay for that!"
With a small nod to the clones, he ordered them to begin the assault. Various curses rang out in the forest as the clones bellowed insults at the monster. A small scrimmage occurred at the centre as the remaining clones charged, brandishing their kunai and shuriken in an effort to destroy it.
The monster was surprisingly smart, using its small size to its advantage as it danced around the clearing, passing through his long legs, and often drawing their attacks to hit each other rather than itself. It had even managed to hop on a clone's back, using the clone as a shield against a particularly fatal swipe. Then, using the momentum of the falling clone, the tomato jumped to the air, widening its mouth as it chomped down on the attacking clone's head.
Naruto hung his head dejectedly as he watched his clones being decimated by the small monster. Maybe he was giving the thing too little credit. After all, only two clones remained and they looked too winded to do much else. The tomato waited, resting its weight on a single stubby foot as it used its arms for balance before it twirled, much like a ballerina. It continued spinning much to the his amazement.
One of the clones dived, foregoing to use any weapons and instead tried to tackle it. Judging from the crazed look in the clone's eyes, his intention was to choke the creature to death with his bare hands. The other followed up behind him, a kunai poised in his hands as he waited for a decent opening to finish this ludicrous battle.
The creature slid past the narrow opening around the clone's arms and jumped to the air once more, its mouth widening as it prepared chomp down on the clone's head. As it bit down hard, the clone was destroyed, leaving the tomato hanging in mid-air all for but a moment.
That was all the last clone needed as he followed up with a diagonal downward slash. However, defying all logic one would assume from the capabilities of a fruit monster, it ducked underneath his blow causing him to only graze the tomato. It clipped the top of the green stalk before the clone too popped as it retaliated with a quick strike of its own.
It dropped to the ground.
"Chi... Chichi... Chi..."
If the tomato had eyes, Naruto reckoned that it would have been like a puppy crying, hanging its large head dejectedly as it cradled the stray clippings of the green stalk in its doll-like arms. It tried to reach over his head to touch the stalk on top, but due to its small arms, it failed. Instead, the tomato settled for patting the side of his head which the teen guessed must have been the cheek area.
Was it possible for a tomato to have cheeks?
However, he had no time to ponder over the oddity of a tomato monster with cheeks as the creature shrilled out a war cry. He only assumed. It was kind of an odd screeching sound.
The tomato stalked forward aggressively.
If that wasn't obvious, the guttural growl, together with the excessive amounts of saliva dripping from its fangs, really helped to make that distinction.
Naruto sighed.
As much as he pitied the little creature, he had a mission to complete; it was best to stop fooling around. Rolling his shoulders to ease the tension in his shoulders, he began doing small stretching exercises as he waited for the tomato to approach him. Besides, the thing was being overly dramatic. The stalk on his head would grow back eventually, right?
Right?
He didn't have time to think about it as the tomato launched into a flying head butt. It was too ambitious attacking head-on like that. Reaching into his pouch, he pulled out a kunai, twirling it around in his hands as he settled on using the butt of the weapon. Naruto didn't even use a quarter of his strength as he slammed the blunt edge atop its head, lest the juice inside its head squirted out.
Was that possible? Did it have a brain or juice inside?
It crashed down to the ground, its body leaving a small indent on the earth. If that attack injured it, it didn't show it as the tomato pulled itself back up, thrusting its mouth forward as it attempted to gnaw at his feet.
Casually jumping over the small creature, he landed into a crouch, following up with a sweep to its body. He put a little bit more strength to his attack as the tomato soared through the air and smashed against the base of a tree, small cracks forming in the trunk from the strain of the blow.
The tomato cried out as it slumped to the ground, dark bruises and small cuts littering its body. It struggled to get up, its hands trembling to support its weight. Its herculean finally effort failed as he collapsed, succumbing to the wounds Naruto had inflicted on it.
"Chi..." its voice, weak from exhaustion, trailed off.
Naruto winced.
He didn't mean to be so rough; he kind of felt like a jerk for hurting the stupid tomato. It hadn't even done anything to provoke him at first.
Naruto went over to the body, crouching over it as he inspected its wounds, which was odd because he had no idea how to heal a fruit. He cradled the body into his arms, adjusting it so that it looked like he was hugging a plush doll.
He had to admit that the spinning thing it did was kind of cool.
Come on, even Konoha didn't have dangerous, dancing fruits. Yamato-sensei would definitely like it, what with his Mokuton abilities and all. Heck, maybe even Sakura-chan would find it cute too.
In time...
Naruto shrugged as he began to head back into town.
Martha didn't mention anything about killing the poor thing; just to stop it. Why, he bet that even the brunette might change her mind if she saw Tomato-chan for herself.
0.0
Martha blinked.
Confusion and panic ensued as the patrons of her establishment reacted to Naruto's sudden presence. Only, they were panicking more on what he was holding in his arms.
"It's the devil fruit!"
"Oh dear God, look at its teeth! Look at its bloody teeth!"
Martha rushed from behind the counter, pushing Naruto towards the back room, just in case their customers suddenly decided to start leaving in fear. "It's all right, folks! The monster is clearly harmless now. All of this wouldn't have been possible if not for the efforts of this young boy, so you should all thank Naruto for his hard work," she hurriedly announced to the patrons, before slamming the door to the back room shut. She leaned her back against the door, blocking it with her body just in case some busybody tried to peek in.
"What were you thinking, hun?"
"I didn't know what to do with it after the fight. Since you never said anything specific, I thought I'd just bring it back for uh, proof." Naruto held out his hands, bringing the unconscious creature closer to her. "Meet Tomato-chan, isn't he cute?"
"Kyaaa! Ge-Get it away! Get it away!"
"He's not so bad once you get used to him. That reminds me, do you have any spare tomatoes? The little guy might get hungry once he wakes up."
"Check the pantry," Martha said, pointing a shaky finger at the corner of the room. "Why didn't you kill it?"
Naruto had the sleeping monstrosity snuggled in the crook of his arm, and his back was to her as he rifled through the contents in the pantry. Turning, he frowned. "It didn't feel right. Besides, Tomato-chan is really cool once you get to know him. He can dance, you know?"
As luck would have it, the tomato creature, or Tomato-chan now, groaned, shaking its comically large head to clear out the cobwebs. Realising that it was in the grasp of an enemy, it leapt out of Naruto's arms, landing the kitchen counter. It ignored her delirious screams, snapping its mouth at Naruto. It tried to point at the damaged stalk above its head.
Naruto was oblivious to its anger, holding a fresh tomato in his hand. "Here it is! You must be hungry, right?"
Tomato-chan eyed the fruit, saliva dripping down its fangs as its anger was suddenly replaced by ravenous hunger. As the teenager lobbed the fruit up in the air, Tomato-chan followed its path as it took flight, waiting for a moment for it to descend to a suitable level. The creature jumped off the counter, doing a small flip and chomping down on its meal in a single bite. It then landed on the floor gracefully. Riding on its high from a decent meal, it did a pirouette, spinning on its stubby feet as it licked its lips in satisfaction.
"What did I tell you?" Naruto smiled, eyeing the little monstrosity with pride. "Cool, huh?"
Martha, who had moved from her position against the door, crouched before the strange fruit that remained oblivious to its surroundings. "This is amazing," she said. "Are you sure it's harmless?"
"Well, I guess. But you should just feed it lots of tomatoes just in case. It might get snappy if you don't."
Suddenly, the door squeaked open as Ross, her assistant, stuck his head in; she noticed there were beads of sweat trickled down his forehead. "Martha? Is everything a-all—" he screamed, finally noticing the not-so-dead fruit in front of her. Tomato-chan used the distraction to dash out of the room, easily bypassing the jittery man.
"Damn it, Ross! The customers!" Martha shouted.
"Gaargh! Tomato-chan!"
Naruto chased after the little creature out of the back room with her trailing after him.
"Devil fruit!"
Once again, they entered the bar to the panicked screams of the patrons. Her terrified patrons were bum-rushing the exit, pushing and stumbling over tables, chairs and each other in the confusion.
Martha found Tomato-chan atop the counter at the bar. It looked around the bar, ignoring the hysteria and seemed to be in awe of its new surroundings.
"Chichichichichichichi..."
It chittered happily, but its happiness was lost on the crowd which only resulted in sending the patrons into a frenzied tizzy. Screams of impending death and wails of mercy rang out in the bar.
Naruto was about to make a grab for the dancing fruit had it not been for her.
"Stop!" Martha shouted, effectively freezing everyone in the establishment. Tomato-chan included. The bartender strode past a gaping Naruto as she made her way towards the wayward fruit.
"Chi?"
"Here," Martha said kindly, handing Tomato-chan another tomato, hoping that it would have the same effect as it did before.
It did.
The small crowd looked on in amazement and wonder as the fruit danced around the counter, twirling and jumping as if dancing to some unheard music in the background. In an instant, the crowd was hooked, peels of laughter and small talk broke out among the crowd as they began trickling into the bar once more.
Some voiced their disbelief that this was the same monster that was terrorising their farms, while others were in awe. They crowded the counter, trying to catch a glimpse of the peculiar fruit. Despite their misgivings, all of them agreed that there was just something so heartening about its dance that it brought a smile to their faces.
Martha sighed in relief, thankful that this mess had been resolved. Glancing the blond next to her out of the corner of her eyes, she said, "You're a real troublesome guy, you know that?"
Naruto only offered a nervous grin in return.
Mages Guild Card
Name: Naruto Uzumaki
Age: Sixteen
Magic: Magic? Isn't that for like little kids?
Likes: Ramen and training
Dislikes: The forces of evil, and this place, wherever this place is...
Notes: Due to the machinations of the King of Edolas, he was unwittingly transported to Earthland. He's having trouble coming to terms with his new predicament, but sees no other way to deal with it. Since coming to Earthland, he noted that the odd natural energy in the air might be affecting his ability to summon, though it's only a theory. He has an objective he would like to achieve sooner rather than later: to return home.
~I just really, really want to go home~
Side Note: Go favourite this story for the devil fruit reference. Thanks for the reviews and support too. It's been amazing.
Clone Four: He had no real bearing on the story, and will not change anything about the other clones. I thought it was a funny idea, but turned to be depressing at the end.
Tomato-chan: It was supposed to die, but I couldn't find it in my heart to do so. For those not in the know, it's a mark battle from Final Fantasy XII. Reference!
Next Chapter: Lechery in Mermaid's Cove…