Lucifer smirked. He bent downward a bit and placed his hands on Luke's shoulders. For the longest time, he stood there, massaging his fingers into Luke's shoulders. For a moment, Azazel thought his fingers would end up thrusting through the Hell Scholar's skin.
"Human torture?" Lucifer questioned. "Am I to torture you, my dear scholar?"
Luke jumped, moving away from Lucifer. He slid up his glasses with two fingertips and looked at Lucifer, an expression of shock on his face.
"No, human souls," Luke corrected the demon. "I want to witness your finest work. Your personal work. WORK BY YOUR VERY HANDS!"
Azazel frowned and placed his hands over his ears. "Why are you always yelling?"
Luke looked at Azazel and hissed.
"Damn snake," Azazel muttered.
"Shall I feed you to the sluaghs then?" Lucifer asked Luke. "No wait. That's for Azazel, or maybe I am mistaken and he has dendrophobia?"
"What makes you think I am afraid of trees, of all things?" Azazel asked Lucifer, completely unamused.
The Lord of Hell ignored Azazel and instead continued on with his thoughts.
"Maybe I will feed you the Lobsticks? No, that's boring. Can I shove you down a demon pit? Well, you are one of my subordinates, so it would not be a lot of fun for me. I need you to continue your records."
"Lord Lucifer," Luke began with a frown. "We are to abuse already tormented souls. THE SOULS OF HELL. HELL SOULS."
"What is this, a new soul-like game?" Azazel muttered under his breath.
"Well, damn," Lucifer sighed. "What fun is that? Do you want to be burned by a thousand hellish flames? It may be kinky."
Azazel slumped forward in the chair. Considering they were in Hell, it wasn't a very interesting place.
"This is a complete, horrid waste of time," Azazel groaned, rubbing his temples.
He was coming down with a horrible migraine while listening to the two idiots with him. It didn't help that Luke insisted on screaming every other word that escaped his mouth.
He would have preferred to be reborn as a middle manager if it meant he could avoid visiting Hell with those two buffoons.
"Ah, Egor?" Lucifer questioned, looking down to his feet. He swiftly gathered the tiny imp in his arms.
The imp spent a moment gnawing at Lucifer's fingertips in an attempt to rip into his flesh, but didn't seem to find success, as his teeth were too small and the gloves blocked his chance at even inflicting a papercut sized wound.
"Forget about that thing," Luke growled as he pointed at the imp nestled in the blonde demon's brace.
"I would never," Lucifer scoffed, turning to the side and clutching onto the critter tighter.
Azazel could see the look of disgust on Lucifer's face from the demon lord's own act of scoffing. At least that was entertaining.
"You're damn ugly," Egor stated to Lucifer's face as he scrunched up his furry nose.
"Do you have a death wish?" Lucifer purred, holding the small imp in one hand. "I could crush you any moment I desire."
Lucifer brought Egor to his face, his fingers holding his itty, bitty hands down. He slowly rubbed his cheeks back and forth against the imp's body. This caused the imp to have a guttural reaction, nearly vomiting on the Lord of Hell's cheek.
"Your clothes stink," the imp growled.
Lucifer stood up straight and looked down at the imp he held. "Is that so? Should I change clothes before I torture human souls?"
"Could you not?" Azazel asked, planting his face down against the solid wood table.
Azazel felt defeated. He was just going to leave his head against the table until they decided to actually do something so he could go home. He felt like his head had already rested against the table for days, though.
This table feels like home. I shall pretend the table is Emma.
"Let me touch Hellfire," Luke begged Lucifer. "THE FIRE THAT CAN DROP THE SPIRITS TO THEIR KNEES."
"Flesh burns like a bitch," Egor pointed out.
"If he wants to touch the fire," Lucifer paused, stroking his chin. "I could create a special room. Hellish enough. Very demonic. We could all play together in one big coffer of fire."
"I want it more hellish," Luke said, as his eyes shone with a newfound determination. "JUST ME AND YOU, LUCIFER."
"Nasty, you sick f*ck," the imp scowled at the Hell Scholar.
"Egor." Lucifer frowned at the imp. "Remember, PG-13. Though, I shall pass on the offer."
"Shit f*ck hell!" Egor yelled as he looked into Lucifer's eyes.
Lucifer tapped the imp on the chest.
"That is not PG-13, small censor Egor. I can't bleep all this out."
Luke sighed. Even he was growing sick of the back-and-forth banter that was quickly leading nowhere.
"COMMENCE THE BEGINNINGS OF HUMAN TORTURE," Luke commanded out, his voice echoing through the castle.
Azazel moved his head, his forehead hitting the solid wood with a loud thump.
I didn't think it was possible for a man to be so severely lacking in brain cells. Maybe if I keep hitting my head on this table, I'll be able to understand him.
"As you wish," Lucifer smirked.
With a fluid movement, the blonde-haired demon raised his fist. A bright, purple-black, fiery magic circled around it. It pulsated as it swirled around his gloved fist. It even caused small lightning bolts to manifest out of its hellish power.
The spell was rather enchanting, but Azazel had enough, so he vowed to keep his promise to himself to leave his head glued to the dining table.
The sound Azazel heard was similar to static running through a television. Even the hair on Azazel's neck and the top of his head rose from the sheer demonic power that circled in the air above them.
The air had given his skin major goosebumps. He was glad he was wearing a shirt; otherwise, his nipples would have felt the effects.
Azazel lay with his face planted on the wooden table when the room began to shake and rattle. His ear was flat against the wood. It wasn't going to move until Lucifer left the room with the hell freak.
As his body shook, his butt cheeks were squeezed in the process.
Nice and tight. My ass, that is.
The vibrations rattling Azazel's body lasted no longer than a second or two before they stopped.
He was almost sad that his asscheeks had stopped clapping.
Almost.
"Here come the souls," Lucifer hummed, tossing Egor behind his shoulder.
Lucifer took a seat at the head of the table and scanned the room, his head resting against the tall back. He seemed utterly unamused by the ordeal, having witnessed it countless times.
One by one, human bodies began to drop into the center of the room, piling up against the ceiling. As the souls trapped in the bodies attempted to escape, Lucifer simply snapped his fingers.
"You're not going anywhere until the hell freak has had enough."
Even he's calling him a hell freak.
Azazel ignored it and closed his eyes. Surely it would be over soon enough, and he could return home to Terra.
The bodies had frozen in place with the Lord of Hell's simple snap of his fingers.
"SHOW US YOUR TRUE MOST ENCULTING RITUALS!" Luke yelled out in Lucifer's direction.
Egor scaled Lucifer's legs and looked at the demon. "Can I bathe in this f*cker's entrails?"
Lucifer couldn't help but laugh in response to the small imp's request. As much as he would love to make a display out of the deranged Hell Scholar, he didn't want to cause a scene in front of his dear son.
"That's not the way to treat a guest," Lucifer hummed.
"Shit stain," Egor grumbled.
The imp climbed up to Lucifer's shoulder and onto his head. He ran his little demon fingers through Lucifer's blond locks.
"Should I turn your soul into a hamster and shove a needle up your ass?" Egor questioned, snickering in the demon's ear.
"How utterly delightful." Lucifer laughed. "Your ass will be the one destroyed, though."
"Shit f*cker."
A small pile of human bodies came crashing to the ground, splattering all over the tiled floor, making a complete mess of the dining hall.
"What is that splashing noise?" Azazel asked with a low groan.
"Bodies!" Luke managed to exclaim. "GLORIOUS, TORTURED BODIES."
"Wonderful," Azazel stated dryly, not finding that enough of a reason to open his eyes.
Azazel grunted against the table.
One of the bodies even fell on the back of Lucifer's chair, but he was also unphased. He simply flicked his wrist, pushing the body to the ground.
The imps began to clatter and gather back into the room. They began to lap the blood off the floor and roll around the remains.
"Are you satisfied?" Lucifer asked as his red eyes narrowed on Luke.
"It's amazing," Luke applauded the Lord of Hell enthusiastically.
"It's not over yet," Lucifer smiled wickedly.
Out of seemingly nowhere, Azazel could smell a new stench. The stench was a rather revolting one and was something akin to what he had taken a whiff of when Luke was kneeled over in the bathroom in the pub. He could feel his stomach begin to churn.
Some bodies cracked and popped as they landed, smashing and splattering against the hard tile. When they landed, the scent was even heavier in the air.
Luke's face scrunched up as he ran out of the room, the man holding his nose.
"Septic souls!"
That better not be the next soul game after hell souls. I cannot deal with septic souls.
"It looks like he had enough," Lucifer sighed as he leaned back in his chair.
Azazel's head shot up in an instant. He was feeling it. That was finally enough to make him rise from his seat.
"V-Vile." He stammered, quickly following Luke out of the room.
He was sure the vomiting would be worse than after his previous alcohol drinking sessions.
Maybe.
Lucifer shrugged.
"I'll make a real man out of that boy someday."