Raj is at his apartment, twirling the motorcycle keys between his fingers, still smiling after the whole experience. He picks up his phone and calls Howard.
Raj: "Howard! Guess what I did today?"
Pause as Howard responds.
"No, I didn't buy another telescope… I mean, not yet. But what I did was way more… radical." (pauses dramatically) "I bought a motorcycle! A Harley."
Another pause.
"Yes, a Harley! You know, the kind you see in action movies? The kind that makes Tom Cruise look like a badass, except I'm Indian and I don't run across rooftops."
"What? Of course I know how to ride! I mean, it's not that hard when you have the… right skills. Let's just say, riding this thing is like playing Mario Kart on easy mode." (laughs to himself)
More of Howard's response.
"Yes, I will wear a helmet, relax. I don't want to mess up this pretty face. Ladies can't resist the charm of a responsible biker, you know?"
Howard says something.
"And before you ask… yes, women will love it. I'm already planning a night ride under the stars. Like those romantic movie dates… but without the bad ending credits."
"You want to go for a ride? Oh man, of course you can! But you'll have to get your own leather, because, honestly, I'm already feeling like the Indian James Dean. We'd be like… Batman and Robin! Except… I'm Batman."
Howard keeps talking.
"Yes, Howard. I know you think I'm Robin. But look, who's got the bike and who's still driving their mom's car?"
"Anyway, we'll meet up later. And don't forget, if you need a ride… call the driver you already know."
"By the way, where are you now, Howard?"
He listens to Howard's response and smiles.
"Alright, I'll swing by and we'll head over to Sheldon's apartment together. It's going to be epic!"
Raj pauses, listening to Howard ask something.
"A helmet? Oh, of course I have a spare helmet. And let me tell you… it's gorgeous, man. Very stylish."
Raj tries to stifle a laugh.
"Is it flashy? Howard, you can't even imagine. You're going to look stunning in it. A true… road diva."
He lets out a contained laugh and ends the call, already picturing his friend's reaction.
"See you soon, buddy. And remember: I'm the damn Batman."
Raj hangs up with a mischievous smile on his face, already anticipating the moment Howard would see the female helmet he set aside for him.
[Sheldon's Apartment Staircase]
Raj and Howard are climbing the building stairs, Howard carrying a pink helmet with the front open, visibly annoyed. Raj is twirling the motorcycle keys with a smile on his face.
Howard (complaining): "Seriously, Raj? I look like an ice cream delivery guy with this pink helmet. Why is yours super stylish and mine looks like it was made for a five-year-old?"
Raj shrugs, unable to hold back his laughter.
Raj: "I just wanted to make sure you stayed… safe."
Howard (huffing): "Safe? I'm getting mocked by everyone on the street! Your helmet is all black, with a dark visor, and looks like real biker gear. Mine looks like it came from a kiddie park."
Raj tries to stay serious, but ends up laughing.
Raj: "Oh, come on, Howard. Pink is a bold color. You looked pretty confident. Plus, did you see the looks we attracted?"
Howard: "Looks? Yeah, looks of pity and embarrassment! You zoomed by, and I was there, clinging to your shoulder with this Barbie pink helmet!"
Raj laughs even more.
Raj: "Oh, but the best part was when that woman at the traffic light said your helmet was 'adorable'. And your face? Man, you turned so red it almost matched it!"
Howard, irritated: "I was thinking of jumping off the bike at that moment. You know, to save the rest of my dignity."
Raj gives Howard a pat on the back, still having fun.
Raj: "Relax, Howard. You actually looked good in it. Maybe I'll get you a matching jacket for Christmas?"
"If you do that, you better be ready to sleep with one eye open, Raj." Howard said before knocking and opening Sheldon's apartment door and going in.
They close the door, and Sheldon, who is on the couch working on his laptop, glances at them.
Sheldon: "Interesting. You bought a motorcycle, Raj? That practically guarantees you'll be involved in some sort of collision soon. Statistically speaking, of course."
Raj, ignoring the pessimism: "Yes, Sheldon, I bought a motorcycle. A Harley Davidson. Stylish, imposing…" he says with a dreamy look.
Leonard, who was sitting on the other side of the couch, looks up for the first time. He notices Raj's new look: styled hair, leather jacket, boots.
Leonard, confused: "Wait a minute… Raj? What happened to you?"
Howard interrupts, sarcastically: "Oh, didn't you hear? Our dear Raj is now the new bad boy of the town. With a bike and everything."
Leonard sits quietly on the other side of the couch, looking downcast.
Raj: "So, what are you guys doing? Leonard looks like he's got a bit of a… I don't know, depressed look. Is everything okay?"
Sheldon, without looking up from his screen: "Leonard saw Penny kissing another man earlier today. And now, he's dealing with the inevitable emotional consequences of unfulfilled expectations."
Howard incredulously asks: "Kissing? How? Pecks? Stolen? Full-on tongue?"
Leonard, irritated: "Shut up, Howard."
"I'm a romantic." Howard responds.
Sheldon: "I recommend trying the emotional detachment I practice. It works perfectly."
Leonard: "Yes, Sheldon, because you have so much experience with women to know how to handle these situations."
Sheldon looks at Leonard with a serious expression. "The relevance of my romantic history here is null. The logical analysis is clear: the mistake was creating expectations."
Raj: "Oh, I know exactly what you need! Nothing cures a romantic disappointment like another… romantic distraction! Woman against woman, Leonard! Why don't you try asking another girl out? Maybe you'll forget Penny."
Howard: "Hey, how about Leslie Winkle?"
Leonard, hesitant: "Leslie? Seriously? I don't know… never thought of her that way."
Sheldon: "Well, if we consider it statistically, the success of any romantic advance with Leslie is unlikely, but… not impossible."
[Caltech Cafeteria]
Leonard, Sheldon, Raj, and Howard are sitting at the table, having lunch. Leonard is visibly down after his attempt to ask Leslie Winkle out.
Howard: "So, Leonard, how was your approach with Leslie? Did she give you a scientific 'yes' or more of a categorical 'no'?"
Raj: "Or was it something like: 'Sorry, Leonard, but you're outside my romantic possibilities spectrum'?"
Leonard: "She basically ignored me… said she wasn't interested in 'mating activities' with me."
Sheldon: "Well, Leonard, you should have considered the probabilities before trying. Your romantic failure rate is statistically high, especially with women who have an IQ above 130."
Leonard: "Thanks, Sheldon. That really boosts my self-esteem."
Sheldon: "I don't see why you're so down. Considering your constant inability to maintain any romantic interest, this should already be quite clear to you, like gravity or the fact that Penny is interested in someone who isn't you."
"Great, Sheldon. That's exactly what I needed to hear right now." Leonard stands up, grabs his tray, and leaves the table, clearly disheartened.
Sheldon, confused: "Wait, why did he get so upset? I just stated the facts."
Raj: (sighing) "Sheldon, sometimes people don't want to hear facts when they're already down. You should… I don't know… maybe apologize."
Sheldon, confused: "Apologize? Why? He didn't want to hear the truth?"
Raj: "Yes, but there's a right way to say things. Try to be a little less…"
"Sheldon." Howard finishes.
"Exactly! Try to be less you."
Sheldon, thoughtful: "So, basically, I should ignore reality and make him feel better about something that is undeniably a failure?"
Raj shrugs: "Yes."
Sheldon: "That defies all logic!"
[End Credits]
[Sheldon and Leonard's Apartment]
Leonard is on the couch. Sheldon enters, a bit hesitant, holding a piece of paper.
Sheldon: (approaching) "Leonard, I… would like to offer a retraction. Upon further analysis, I realized that my approach at the table was… a bit insensitive."
Leonard looks at Sheldon, curious: "Oh, really?"
Sheldon: "Realistically speaking, you weren't exactly rejected by Penny, since you never asked her out. Therefore, your level of rejection is, in fact, theoretically null."
Leonard, thoughtful: "You know, Sheldon, you're right. I never asked her out. And if I never tried, how can I know if there's a chance?"
Sheldon, surprised: "Hey, I didn't say that…"
Leonard: "That's it! I'm going to ask Penny out. At least I'll give it a try!"
Sheldon: "Leonard, wait. I just wanted to… soften the situation, not… not for you to take it as encouragement!"
Leonard: "It doesn't matter, Sheldon. I'm going to give it a chance. Thanks for… making me think."
Leonard leaves the apartment, leaving Sheldon alone, staring at the door, confused.
Sheldon talking to himself: "Really, this deviates from the logical pattern. And I still can't understand how this translates into… friendship."
Sheldon shakes his head and returns to his activities.