Ava's PoV
As we sat in the car, the atmosphere was almost filled with silence. Aubrey peacefully slept on Asher's shoulder, they're just fighting earlier but now they're like a real couple. Chloe, always the social butterfly, busied herself with capturing pictures, and selfies and engaging in lively conversation with her new friend, Theodore. I don't know how they met. Isabella is like a sleeping angel, leaning against Ezra's shoulder. They look like a real couple, hays I don't know anymore. It pained me to see them together, their closeness a constant reminder of what I could never have but what can I do, he might just attracted in my body but not me.
Lost in my thoughts, I turned my gaze towards the window, seeking solace in the beauty of the passing scenery. The sun's warm rays bathed the world in a golden glow, casting a soothing ambiance that momentarily eased the ache in my heart.
"Ava, do you want some?" Ezra's voice broke through my reverie, and I reluctantly tore my gaze away from the window. He held out a potato chip.
"No, thanks," I replied softly, my voice betraying the turmoil I felt inside. With a heavy heart, I returned my attention to the window. I don't want to look at them at all.
"I think I need to find a lover too," I muttered under my breath, the words escaping without much thought. Chloe's gaze suddenly landed on me, a knowing smile playing at the corners of her lips. Oh, no...
"That's right! Very well! Finally God!" Chloe exclaimed, her excitement bubbling over. I quickly covered her mouth, desperate to silence her before she revealed anything.
"What did you say?" Ezra's voice cut through the air, his brows furrowing with curiosity. I mustered a weak smile and dismissed it as nothing, hoping to brush off his attention. But his frown lingered, a sign that he sensed something was amiss.
"She said she's looking for a lover," Aubrey interjected, suddenly awake and fully invested in the conversation. You were just sleeping a second ago..I couldn't help but feel a mix of annoyance and gratitude towards her for speaking up. It seemed like everyone was determined to meddle in my personal life.
"Really?" Ezra's question hung in the air, his eyes locked onto mine, searching for answers. I took a deep breath, summoning a bittersweet smile that masked the pain within.
"Why not, right? Ava is attractive. There's no way she can't find someone worthy," Aubrey chimed in. Ouch, my head.. why are you guys...
"Why the sudden change of heart?" Ezra's gaze bore into mine, his eyes filled with curiosity. I swallowed the lump in my throat, mustering the strength to respond. Well, you won't understand me anyway.
"Because I also want to lean my head on someone's shoulder. You guys look like you're on a triple date, and it makes me feel like a third wheel," I admitted, my voice tinged with bitterness. I watched as Ezra flinched, a reaction that confirmed my fears. After all, it wasn't as if he could offer his shoulder for me to lean on.
A few minutes later, we finally arrived at the beach. It's a resort owned by Aubrey's family, conveniently close to our location. As I pulled my suitcase along, I was taken aback when Ezra unexpectedly reached for it, offering to carry it alongside Isabella's belongings. On any other occasion, I would have been elated by his gesture, but now it felt like a response to what I said earlier.
We settled into our rooms, a luxury that provided a much-needed respite It's quiet and peaceful alone in my room, the soundproof wall and the cold breeze from the window are just very peaceful. If only I could stay here alone, away from the sight of them enjoying their time with their partners, I definitely would. But I knew I couldn't ruin the mood, so I'd go with the flow, even if it meant suppressing my pain.
I changed into my pink bikini, feeling both sexy and self-conscious. To cover up, I wore a see-through cardigan and headed out to the beach. As I approached, I saw Ezra and Isabella jamming under a coconut tree, their laughter and joy filling the air. Meanwhile, the two lovebirds are playing volleyball. I couldn't help but feel a pang of envy and longing deep within me. I wanted to join them, but I can't don't know if I could paint my smile with them. They're having fun now and I don't want to see it. Frustration welled up inside me, and I retreated to my room, seeking comfort on my bed.
"Fuck," I whispered, unable to hold back the tears that silently streamed down my face. This unrequited love had become my constant companion, a painful burden that I carried alone. Aubrey and Chloe knew it but I never told Isabella because she'd reject Ezra without a second thought and that would hurt Ezra or maybe ruin our friendship so it's better to let them be. Isabella is my dear friend and I don't want her to make decisions just because of me, I'm not that selfish person.
Ezra and I had been childhood friends, growing up in the same neighborhood and sharing a close bond. We were inseparable, and I even often stayed at his house when my parents were away. But as we entered high school and girls began to approach him, I couldn't help but feel a surge of jealousy. It was then that I realized my feelings for Ezra went beyond friendship.
I kept my feelings hidden, convinced that Ezra wasn't ready for a serious relationship. I didn't want to risk losing our friendship, especially since he had rejected other girls who confessed their feelings for him. I became his rock, always there to support him in everything he pursued.
When he expressed his dream of becoming a musician and a famous guitarist, I decided to learn how to sing too. I took private vocal lessons, honing my talent to become his vocalist. Despite my parents' wishes for me to become a lawyer like my siblings, I defied them and pursued music to stand by Ezra's side. This led me to get kicked out and no choice but to live in a dorm, with my older brother secretly providing me with allowance. I never told Ezra about this, fearing he would feel burdened and guilty.
I believed our bond was unbreakable, that no other girl could come between us. But five years ago, Ezra fell in love with Isabella, my best friend. My heart shattered into pieces. I thought I was the closest person to him, the one who knew him inside out. Yet, he had chosen someone else.
I wanted to ask him why it couldn't be me, to understand where I had gone wrong. But I couldn't bring myself to confront him because when he shared his feelings for Isabella, he was so happy, and I couldn't bear to ruin his joy by revealing my unrequited love.
Isabella claimed she wasn't ready for a relationship, which gave me a glimmer of hope. I thought Ezra might eventually give up on her, and I was willing to wait. But five years had passed, and his feelings for Isabella remained unchanged. I had liked him for ten years, enduring this unrequited love for far too long. Why couldn't he see my feelings? I had done everything in my power to drop hints and show him my love, going above and beyond what a normal best friend would do. But still, he remained oblivious. How dense is he ...
Insecurities plagued my mind. I questioned if there was something wrong with me if I wasn't enough for him to see me as a woman. The doubts gnawed at my soul but I can't figure out why he can't love me like I do.
"Ugh, hic..." I sobbed quietly, the pain consuming me. How long would I have to wait? Perhaps I was waiting for something that would never happen. But even so, I held onto a sliver of hope. Maybe one day, if Isabella admitted her feelings for someone else, I would have my chance. Until then, I would continue to silently wait, keeping both of them close to my heart.
To be continued...