Well expectations are not always true. Maybe this was so much wrong that I deserved to be yelled at. I came back to my room, saw that burger in the plate and wondering that a burger can actually do this.
A burger became a reason for the conflict. Well to be exact it was not about the burger. It was about my wrong sentence. But at that moment all I could think was to be treated and taught with love and calmness.
This burger thing was not my first conflict with my mom which she dealt with anger. Many a times I would always end up with the same thought that why no one would teach me politely.
On the other hand, my sister always had this advantage that she would not do the things from which I got yelled at. This would make her better than me, even though she was five years younger than me.
I spent some alone time in my room crying and thinking about myself. I even thought that I should just end my life so that everyone can be happy from their own lives. I will never bother them and they will be able to live a peaceful life.
But this was just a thought because of my emotions. Although, at that moment it was hurtful to its extreme. I did not talk to anyone and kept crying till I sleep.
Next morning, I was in a deep sleep when I realised my parents are sitting and front of me and trying to love me. They were giving me kisses on my cheek and asking me to get up. But I was so tired that I could feel the kisses but could not get up. I gave my mom a kiss in half sleep. Although, it was their way of giving me love. But I still could not get over the fact of being yelled at.
Yes, they were right to teach me to say things in a better way. But it still kept hurting. Somehow, I even stopped myself to tell my boyfriend about what happened with me and how I felt. Because I knew his answer amd in addition I could not even expect and gesture from him because now we were not in school therefore, we could not meet everyday and talk to each other. I entered college last to last year. My second year of college was about to end in one month. But my boyfriend took a gap year which means he was in first year and he was about to enter the second year in one month. Also, we were in different colleges.
Our home was not very far. We could meet whenever we want. But still, I somehow sis not find the need to. Maybe this was because of what has happened in the past.
Anyways, as a result of not sharing with him, I had to pretend that nothing has happened and everything is okay with me. The pretending thing was a thing I am bad at. But, I managed. This chatting thing has actually shown us a way to hide the emotions which we would never be able to hide from someone if we are in front of them.