The days seem to fly by and next thing I know, it's Wednesday. I leave practice with Irene. She has been persistent in getting me to go to church with her. My mother has made it very clear. She doesn't care where I am. For the past two days of practice, Irene has been running beside me, cheering me on and trying to convince me that running is fun. I may not agree with her logic, but she makes the pain and suffering a little less miserable. She may have been literally running circles around me, but she has not once left my side.
After several attempts, I finally agreed to go to church with Irene. A part of me is just happy to not have to go home so early and I know my mom is just as pleased. Another part of me is uncomfortable because I don't do church.
Church isn't my thing, and it's not my scene. It's not just church, I just don't do religion, but there's something about the way Irene looks when she speaks of her church. There's something that makes her different. For example, there's a look in her eyes when she invites me to join her. It gives me this feeling, and it makes me want to know what makes her so different. So happy, so strong. I want that in my life.
I can't help but smile at her house because it's cute. It's a small farmhouse that is in the middle of nowhere. I can't help but to laugh as she excitedly introduces me to her three dogs. As soon as we are in sight, they run up to us, barking with excitement. I'm surprised when she tells me there is more. I follow behind her and she continues to show me her six rabbits?
I asked her, "Why do you have so many?"
She shrugs, "I started off wanting one because I've always loved rabbits. Then word got around that we take in unwanted rabbits and my mom has a hard time saying no to people, so next thing you know ..."
She pauses and holds her arms out and spins as she points to each rabbit. She's quick to change the subject as she motions for me to follow her into the next room. I'm filled with shock when we go in there and see that she has about thirty chickens.
She laughs at my shock and nonchalantly adds, "We also have two cows!"
I can feel my face drop and it causes her to laugh. she tries to explain, "The chickens are for eggs!"
She makes an unsure face and then laughs, "At least that's what I said to convince them to get them!"
She laughs and I can't help but to laugh with her because she's filled with love. Pulling me out of the chicken coop and into an open field she pointed to a lonely barn.
Stating, "The cows are for meat."
I smile and rub my belly as I joke, "I love me a good cow!"
We both laugh and I have fun as we walk around the old empty barns. I have never been on a farm setting and even though this isn't an actual farm, it's the closest to one that I've ever been. Time flies by and the next thing you know, Irene's mom is calling us to get ready for church. The ride is short; she only lives about 10 miles from the church.
Irene all but pulls me into the front door. You can say that I'm not leaping for joy and I'm most definitely not an eager beaver about being here. Ever since we left the house to head to church, my teeth have been clenched. Anytime someone even mentions church, my guard is up.
The first hour surprises me and it's actually not that horrible and I relax. I'm getting the impression that this church is nothing like other churches I have been to. It's not what I had expected. They have games and they are actually fun and the people are kind. Just when I get comfortable, the youth pastor announces that it's time to go worship. Everyone around me seems to not mind and maybe even get excited, but not me. The word worship brings me back to reality and gives me the sudden urge to run out the door.
I don't have a wonderful experience with churches. You could even say that in time, I would have considered Christians to be my enemy. It's not the only reason, but it's definitely one of the main reasons that I am not excited about this part. Another reason is, I'm not a big fan of having people lecture me and calling other people out and embarrassing everybody for the sake of acting like they're righteous and better than everybody else, when in reality, the teachers are the ones that are usually the worst.
Standing around in a circle and singing in a choir like Format has never been my style. Putting that aside, I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't having an amazing time. I'm really liking this place and enjoy the company of the surrounding people. If I wouldn't have come here, I wouldn't have realized that Irene had a pretty voice. It's strong, and it flows through the room. You can tell she sings with her heart.
It's nice to see everybody calm down and it's relaxing how everyone is in sync with each other and you can see and hear the passion and their voices.
Even with it being a more relaxed setting, everyone is still enjoying themselves. The youth pastor gets excited as he announces the pastor would like to speak to everyone. I'm kind of curious to see what the pastors like because the youth pastors are nothing like what I had been expecting.
As he makes his way to Center stage, he reminds me of a movie pastor. You know, the ones that have their 'grandpa sweaters' on and their hair slicked to the side with their khaki pants and their house slippers on.
He continues to impress me by being nothing like any other pastor that I have met before. When he speaks, he speaks with love and kindness, and it's not generated towards one or two individuals. He spreads love to the entire group with his eyes and his voice.
You can always tell when someone is doing something they love and I can tell that he is doing what he loves. I keep pushing back the urge to run because of this reason. The last time I attended worship services where the leader had this kind of passion, it ended badly.
He has so much passion and excitement for this moment that he looks as if he's ready to stand while he speaks.
The youth pastor doesn't stop him but has one boy quietly bring the pastor a chair. He shows his gratitude and sits down and speaks. His voice is kind of like a teacher and firm like a father.
The boldness in his tone allows it to travel throughout the room with no microphone, "Good afternoon!"
His smile is kind as he asks, "How many of you have heard the story of Jesus Christ?"
Naturally, everyone raises their hand. Everyone has heard the name at least once or twice in their lives.
He seems pleased as he continues, "well, I am going to take the time to tell you it again, because it is one of my all-time favorite stories."
His excitement causes us to watch and listen to him with the same excitement that he projects for us. I can't help but wonder how many times he has sat in front of them and told them the story. Does he do this often? Oddly enough, a part of me Can't wait to hear how he is going to express the story. Will it differ from the other times I heard it?
I can't control myself. It is the first time that I have been in a church like this with people who actually enjoy worshiping God. All night they've been speaking of him and why is the peak of my interest? I guess this might be why I sit and wait in anticipation.
Passion all but seeps through every pore of this man as he tells the story, "mankind has upset God many times. God has destroyed cities, and he even flooded the entire world. As most of you know, he saw what it had done to us and he had made promises to never flood the world again. Instead, he sent his son. As we all know, Jesus is the only known perfect being to ever walk the planet! He was and is still the prime example of how we should live. He spent his whole life showing us how to live, love and serve God."
He pauses for a moment and you can see the sadness fill his eyes. This causes me to sit up straight and listen to what he's about to say.
He takes a deep breath and smiles through soft tears as he goes on, "God sent him to show us how to live through God. How to love unconditionally, how to show others who God is and how to live as examples to others through him. He loved the unlovable, healed the unhealable and what did we do?"
He lets out a painful breath as he stands up. "We put nails in his hands and feet. We put a horn crown on his head. We watched the blood trickle down his body and laughed."
He grabs his chair and quietly drags it behind him as he moves closer to us. "We mocked him."
He places the chair down but continues, "When God saw this, he got angry. Just like any father would, but Jesus cried out to his father and pleaded for him to forgive us, for we know not what we do."
He sits down and crosses a leg over another and his eyes go soft.
Crying out, "He was hanging from nothing but nails, bleeding out with pain soaring through his body!"
With tears in his eyes, he looks up at us, but it feels as if he's meant to speak to me because his words sadden my heart and capture my soul.
"Could you imagine it? All that pain and agony and instead of asking God to save him, he asks him to forgive and save us!"
The gratitude and appreciation in the pastor's words and body language is enough to spread throughout the room. When the entire room goes silent, it enhances my curiosity and allows my mind to wonder. In this moment, I realize that I've never felt the way I feel now as I watch and I listen to his story. Could someone really love all of mankind that much? There are so many questions, but I feel it in my heart that this is true. I must have Jesus and God in my life. I need to know more.
A smile crosses my face from ear to ear and tears are rolling down my face because I see now that this is what I'm missing! Therefore Irene can forgive so fast and continue her day because of this feeling I have now. This is what I need and want in my life. It's as if he reads my mind when The pastor stands up.
With a quivering lip, he asks, "is there anyone here tonight that can feel the Lord in your heart or If you have not asked the Lord into your heart yet and would like to do so, please raise your hand."
To be continued...