Just thinking about what will happen in the next days, makes my aching heart to tremble. I knew that I had to walk back home- if not for anything, but for my daughter's sake. everyone I knew turned my back on me, and were mocking me. Some saying "Your family is almost like royalty, yet you beg for bread." I have now become a shadow of my own. Just thinking about what I did to offend God, and I can't find any. I read His word daily, and prayed for forgiveness of sins, I made donations when necessary, and cleaned my priest's office, every Saturday. But, why does it feel like He abandoned me all of a sudden?. No comforting presence, no word of encouragement, rather my heart has been depressed and down. Wasn't Alicia the will of God for me to marry?. But, she was the only person to have ever captured my heart- then why this?.
Our three year old daughter Sophie was sick. According to the doctors, they all said she had Leukemia, and was as a result of certain blood factors responsible for that. Her drugs were constantly supplied by Jude. Jude seemed like the only one I had in this world. He ensured that my daughter's treatment was well taken care of.
" Jude. You…".
" Hey, I told you we are blood alright?- I can't bear to see my elder brother in pain. I've talked to grandma for you, and she promised to think about it. Trust me, you , Alicia and my little niece will move in and live with us, in no time. As for mother and father, I will keep trying to convince them for you, just have this… for now "….
He gave me an envelope, filled up to the brim. My hands were shaking, but he held it in place.
" Big brother, I cherish you more than any of our siblings, you are selfless, and you taught me to accept Christ, and I did. He's been good to me, ever since, and you know? right after our graduation, I will earn a lucrative job and will move you and your family to Georgia, Atlanta. With me, and start up a new life. Everything will be alright? Okay- just stay strong and take good care of your wife and my snowflakes….". He pecked my cheeks and hugged me, we bade each other goodbye.
Jude- so supportive and sacrificial, and my prayer was that if God doesn't hear my prayer, about myself, at least should endeavor to hear that of my brother, to graduate from college with a well paying job and grant his heart desires. So handsome and heavenly, a perfect man to desire. I vowed that whenever my situation turned out for the better, that I would repay him a billion fold, cos, he- he was so good to be true.
I hadn't realized that I was already standing the door to our house. It was one of Mama Mae's old homes, for the elderly, but was abandoned since the war started, and being the kind neighbor that she was, she lent it to us for free. No charge. And heavens know how grateful am I for that . I pushed the door knob, strangely wasn't locked. Alicia doesn't normally go to work on Thursday's, friday's and Saturday. She was supposed to be at work, but why not?- or has Sophie's condition worsened?. My heart began to panic as I hastily went straight to the sitting room, and found Sophie coughing and shaking due to cold. I quickly too off my old jacket and wrapped it around her, she looked up and hugged me.
" Papa- you- you are … ba.. back".
I smiled and pecked her forehead. She was so cute, having lovely eyes, my set of blue eyes and my skin color. The only thing she inherited from Alicia was her hair- her coral black hair, and her smile…. Speaking of Alicia, where was she?
" Where's your momma?".
She shook her head. I had to go and have a look. "She just can't leave my daughter alone". I muttered to myself.
" Just stay here- sweetie, I got to look up for your mother, alright?".
She nodded. I got up and proceeded to look for Alicia.
" Alicia- Alicia-Alicia….".
Then all I heard was the sound of the bed creaking. We only had an old mattress, which got from being a newspaper vendor, marketing for New York Times, which I got paid every three months, and it helped us a lot, together with the help and support from Jude, at least life was fair to an extent. But then why the sound?. Was there?….
My eyes couldn't blink for three minutes, as my lips were in shock and my heart almost slipped out of my chest, as my hands were shaking as I couldn't fathom what I saw. Just saying it makes my heart to beat even more faster. My eyes were dilating partly due to shock and due to being in a steady place.
" Ah…. There … fas…faster…fu…fuck me baby".
My wife, making all manner of pleasure moans, as one other man was riding her like a horse, which was making the bed creak so loudly. Tears rolled down my cheeks, as I watched in horror, my wife, my beloved wife, in our matrimonial bed, cheating on me. God knows that I married Alicia as a virgin, and she did this to me?. I wiped my tears , a mind told me to push that ungodly man out of her, but I restrained myself from doing so. "What is lost is lost". I told myself.