RILEY
➶
Much time went by with the children sprawled on the sofas in the cinema, their hands constantly diving away into the bowls of popcorn, munching away as they laughed and cheered at the action on the big screen.
Clinton sat close to the children on the sofa, purposely avoiding me. The words he said to me back in my room were still taunting me. Was I still in love with my ex-husbands?
No, I wasn't.
It couldn't be. I had long since gotten over them. I was different now, no longer the naïve teenage girl craving the attention of the men she married. That teenage girl had long since grown up and in her stead was a rather matured lady, who knew there was more to life than wanting men who obviously didn't care about her.
I miss them though, Jenna purred in my head, rubbing her face in my neck and sniffing me.
If anyone was more hurt than me by their betrayal, it was her. I could tell she was still interested in them, willing to forgive and forget, even though they never wanted us. They never did.
We are not getting them back so stop swooning over men who obviously do not care about us, I muttered.
I shook my head sadly. Jenna meant well but it was best not to dwell in the past. My heart now belonged to my precious children, giggling at the antics on screen.
Yet Clinton's question lingered like a stubborn thorn in the recesses of my mind. Had I truly succeeded in moving forward? I stole a glance at him, his intentional indifference intensifying the ache within me. A wave of nostalgia washed over me, pulling at my heartstrings and reminding me of days long gone. But no, those moments were relics of the past; we all had undergone significant changes since then.
I turned my head and focused my attention back on the TV, where Tom and Jerry were showing. Sierra's laughter filled the room, and I couldn't help but join in. It was one of her favorite cartoons, and I couldn't help but laugh as the cat and mouse duo chased each other around the screen.
The children were having a great time, and I felt so grateful for this moment. It was simple, but it was filled with love and joy.
I grabbed a handful of popcorn from the bowl on the table in front of me and tossed it into my mouth, savoring the salty, buttery taste.
Standing up, I went to sit in front of my children, resting my head on Sean's legs. He parted his legs to adjust me, helping to place my head in between them. I smiled at the gesture. My son was so sweet.
"Hmmm," I muttered, enjoying the feeling of being with my kids. Sierra giggled beside me and bent to place a soft kiss on the tip of my nose.
"Oh mummy, you are so adorable." I offered her a smile, blowing her a kiss. She grinned and fixed her gaze back at the TV.
"Mummy, will you come and lean on me after some time?" Shane pleaded, earning a low growl from his brother.
A smug grin threatened my lips but I fought them back. "Alright dear, I'm sure your brother wouldn't mind."
Shane's eyes widened, excitement dancing in them. He grinned, showing his perfect baby tooth. "Sure mummy," he nodded.
We spent thirty minutes more in the cinema, watching and laughing with one another.
After I had sent the kids back to their room, promising their favorite dishes during dinner time, I turned to face Clinton who pretended he was scrolling through his phone.
His expression was grim, making it difficult to read. I went and stood in front of him, taking a deep breath before placing a hand on his arm.
"I really need to do this Clinton," I rubbed his arm, feeling him go stiff in my hand. "I promise I will be fine. Alex will make sure they take care of me, that was one of the clauses before he agreed to it." I pulled my lower lip in between my teeth, swallowing saliva down my throat.
Clinton didn't look up from his phone. I decided to try harder. "Will it make you happy to know that I'm not thinking about going back to them?" That seemed to have worked because he looked up, holding my gaze.
His emerald green eyes dazzled before the light, making him look more attractive.
"You know I have no right over your feelings or what you want to do with your life. But I care about you, I'm scared that you'd fall for them again and they'd wound you. I'm scared that they will try to get you back after all they did to you." His tone was hurt and I felt my chest tighten in pain.
Tears welled up in my eyes at the emotions I was seeing in those eyes. I ran to him and hugged him tight, sobbing into his chest, and wondering why life had to be so hard. I loved them but they only hurt me each time.
Clinton hugged me back. "Gosh, I feel so bad that you are going through this." he muttered, rubbing his hand on my back. "What should I do to make things easier for you?"
I was silent for a little while, pondering because he has done so much already yet I had given him nothing in return.
I pulled back to look into his eyes. I shook my head, refusing. "No, I'm alright honestly. There's nothing more you can do other than what you have already done for me." His face held so much confusion that I giggled and touched his sandy blonde hair.
"But I have done nothing for you." I shook my head, reached out my hands, pulling his cheeks and loving his new expression.
"Trust me on this. You have done more than enough." I leaned towards him, and pressed a wetless kiss on his chin.
He took a deep breath.
"Alright, do you promise to be alright when you go over there?" He said, smiling at the shock clearly written on my face. "I'm not sending you off there because I'm happy. I am only doing this because the man in question was children's grandfather."
I laughed, pushing aside his excuses and hugging him. He had really given consent to this? I never thought he would, considering he had eyes on me and didn't trust the kid's fathers a bit.
"You're the best honestly." I pulled away, searching his face. "Thank you so much."
He ruffled my hair. "You are not welcome."
"I'm already welcomed," I grinned, running for the door and opening it. "Thank you so much. Let's talk more about this after dinner." He shrugged, pulling up the sleeves of his shirt. I shut the door and ran to my room, knowing there was a lot to discuss with Alex.