"Would you like another cup?" smiled Kira, ladylike and slightly inclining her head, with a porcelain tea pot in her hand.
"Please."
I held out my tea cup to her and
I had chosen to watch her devilish scheme for a little longer.
Thirty minutes later.
"So, since we're here together why don't we..Uhmm.. Talk about each other, I mean Matsuki, I still don't know much more about you.. aand you see.. I want to know you more." Kira stuttered as I see on my own eyes her nervous state.
I guess knowing each other is a good topic to brought and I was actually kinda curious about her but knowing that I will be cutting her off in my life sooner or later, I don't think that would be needed.
"Is that so?" I bluntly said, having an indifferent look in my eyes. " But what would you like from someone as mediocre like me compared to you?"
I was starting to feel uncomfortable sharing the same time and room, just the two of us, but I was willing to bear up another half an hour and lay back in the sofa.
Kira murmured, "Well, the things you want, your hobbies and..uhmm there's so many things I want to know from you." She happily exclaimed and "Actually, I'd like to know what kind of things that happened to you," She immediately added. "I wanted to know your new side, there are still things I don't know, I want to know it to be exact."
She leaned upright from sofa and stared at me with a red face. She was leisurely waiting for my response while holding the cup of tea.
What does that mean? I know what she exactly said but why would you need to know m- Ah, right. To be exact, she is trying to get some information of my background, huh. that must be it.
"So like, what do even you wanted to know?" I asked, not particularly interested.
"Uhm... there's too many, it's hard to pick when considering some things...Ah that, What junior high did you attend? Is it fun?mine was-"
The cup I was holding, empty with tea, I dropped it the moment Kira mentioned Junior high school..
"Eh? What's the matter?"
"Nothing." Trying to suppress the sudden flash of memory, I changed the topic.
"Well, the only thing that I think you need to know that you still don't know about me is that I'm a liar." I said.
"—Liar?" She paused and seems to be more confused than I could imagine.
I was surprised myself by how deep my tone was.
"I honestly know that hehehe." She chuckles. " I mean Matsuki, I also lie and hide stuff from time to time, you know, and it's normal."
"Really?" While being uninterested on her answer, my eyes glance on the other side and see the clock hanging on the wall and saw that it's been hour and a half since I came here.
If I stay anymore, she might start to question my whole existence, That's the last thing I want to talk about and it's already this late so I stood up from the sofa "I'm leaving," I declared and headed towards the entrance.
Suddenly, something soft enveloped my arm. Kira had clasped it.
"…please, don't leave me alone. I'm.."
Her begging attitude and the soft touch against my arm made me falter.
The unusual fragility she was showing me was more than enough to activate my protective instinct—even if it was a deliberate action of hers to seduce me.
But my rationality cooled down the overwhelming reality and kept me from making a wrong decision.
"Kira, What's with you? You've been acting strange since we walked together on the way here ."
Two teenagers alone under one roof —an alluring setting. Being a man myself, I was naturally interested in what would happen in such a situation, all the more if the girl in question was Kira.
"Don't leave, I'm afraid if I let you leave, the same thing will happen, So I don't mind if it's you, hold me..."
As expected, she tried to capture me with inviting eyes and sweet words.
Had I met Kira under any other circumstances, I would have stood no chance against her seduction.
"I feel honored, but I have no such intentions!"
However, unlike the me years from now in the past, the real one bore up against her.
It was wariness that sustained my rationality.
What was Kira scheming?
I think she was well aware of her own attractiveness and knew how to use it effectively. I had been able to observe that fact more than enough lately. So, perhaps she was trying to make me fall for her?
Either way, I had to get out of here as fast as possible. Even if my assumptions were true and confirmed by Kira at that, it was only a matter of time until I would give in to her.
Because her words may have been lies, but her attractiveness was a fact.
As things stood, I was about to fall into the nature of man.
I knew for sure that as soon as that happened, the poison would spread slowly but surely and paralyze my will to resist.
I shook her off and hurried towards the entrance, but Kira rushed after me in the same breath. This time she clung to me from behind, restraining me.
Her warmth, her softness, her entrancing fragrance blended into a charm deluding the senses and attacked me from behind.
"…Matsuki, don't leave me, I'm scared, you being gone again scares me so…"
Her soft breath touched the nape of my neck. I knew that I had to escape, but I couldn't move a muscle.
"…touch me… do whatever you want with me…I'm fine with it..."
Her delightful words entered my head through my eardrums and turned into paralyzing electrical signals flashing through my entire body. My poisoned legs had already lost the strength to resist a single high school girl.
She gently pushed me into the sofa, leaning against me. The lamp behind Kira created a mystic contrast on her face. She placed her head on my shoulder and put her hands lightly on my chest—as if to feel my heartbeat. Her white, slender selves in blank space.
"Ah.." At that moment, Kira uttered a suppressed moan and writhed, still straddling me.
It was smashing. My rationality was entirely blown away by her unexpectedly sensitive reaction.
Letting my instincts take over, I swapped places and sat astride her. I laid one hand on the white nape of her neck and traced her lush red lips with my fingers. I inhaled her intensive flowery scent, kissed her collarbone and put my knee between her thighs.
"Mmmnnn..a..ugh.."
She reacted exquisitely to each of my actions. I was aware that the blood circulating in my veins was enraptured by pleasure.
Right now———Kira was under my control.
And my mind, full of ulterior motives.
That feeling of elation was far beyond normal. Even I, the cool thinker by principle, would have loved screaming as my feelings told me.
While frantically suppressing the urge to rush, I kept on caressing Kira. I wanted the pleasure to hold on for as long as possible.
I touched her breast through her clothes but I wasn't contented with it so I forcedly remove her clothes.
However, I was suddenly stricken by a shock that made my heart skip a beat. I had noticed her usual reaction.
"—You're trembling."
Kira blinked a few times with her eyes that in passion I had lost focus.
"…I am?" she asked with gentle lip-movements, her voice full of heat.
She was unaware of it herself, but she was trembling all over.
Feelings of guilt that I had pushed aside as my rationality for revenge had gone out of the window suddenly sprung up in me like water.
"…We really shouldn't be doing this. Let's stop," I stated while raising my body.
Kira tremor appeared to me like I was the one at fault and had done something wrong.
I certainly didn't stop because I was a good person but, on the other hand, neither did I enjoy subjugating woman against their will for my own satisfaction, I just wanted her to feel how I felt back then and not like this..
Huh?..
I..I, should've just done it, shouldn't I? I shouldn't have hesitate, she's basically right in front of me, the revenge I desire, I could do it now by forcing myself on her and leaving her.
But why can't I? Damn it am I still hesitant and scared just like back then?..
...
She was still lying on the sofa, looking up at me with wondering eyes. Behind her rumpled uniform, I could see her bulging snow-white skin. I averted my gaze automatically.
"Why? Didn't I say it's fine?"
"But you are trembling."
"That's because of excitement!" She exclaimed.
"I don't think so."
"It is!"
The next moment, Kira said something I couldn't believe.
"It's my first time after all!"
"So I can't help it," she added.
No words came out of my mouth and I cast her off and stood up as if to retreat.
"Why?!" I shouted, channeling all my bewilderment into one word. That was the only thing I could do.
"Everyone has a first time," replied Kira with girlishly pure eyes.
I'm not even someone you love, doing it with me... I'm just...Geez!
"But that's not how you go about it!" I yelled, my frustrations building up.
"That's different for everyone."
"…do as you please as long as it's your own problem. But this time it's me that would have been your partner, you get that?"
"Yes, you are right, I don't know if I am able to satisfy you because it's my first time…," Huh? She's worried about that? She had to be joking.
"Ah, but I'm positive that I will develop excellent skills the more we do it. You know that I'm a fast learner, right? Be it at school or at work."
However, Kira looked dead serious.
"That's not the problem!!"
When was the last time I had become this agitated? I couldn't remember. Thank you very much for this valuable experience, "Kira why are you always so… so reckless!"
"I am surprised myself."
"Don't act so unconcerned!"
"Someone once said that girls in love are invincible; there might be more truth to it than I thought. After all I do feel capable of anything right now," she nodded approvingly.
"Please, don't only think about yourself…" I let out a grand sigh. "In the first place, why are you doing this?...Why?" I asked.
**Sniffles..
Then as I stared at Kira I noticed her tears drip out of her eyes as she looked so sad in front of me.
What's with her?
"Wait, why are you the one... Who's crying? I'm the one who's confused here!" I snap, I couldn't suppress myself anymore.
*Sigh" Really what's wrong with you?!"
"Did I do something wrong, Matsuki?" She whimper.
"Is it because I haven't been able to spend time with you?....." she paused. "I had no choice, suddenly my mother has become ill and I couldn't just leave her, I'm sorry."
What?..
"I felt bad about it too... That's why I'm doing this, It was my apology to you." She rubbed her tears out of her face as she talk.
Then she stood as her usual diligent self and said:
"Fine."
"Huh? Fine..what?"
"I won't talk to you until you're done being mad."
What the heck?
"I'm going to bed now,"
The hell is this? I can't understand her, Uhg! I can't...hold back anymore.
"I've already got a ton of things going on my mind, And you're making things worse!" Shit I've done it.
Maybe this could be a reason for a break up, even if it's to early as what I planned, may be this is the right time to cut this one.
"Uhm.." She cover her mouth as she looked at me with a teary eyes.
*Hic...hic....hic*
"Huh? Why are you crying again?" she's really always crying, sigh.
"*Hic... I'm sorry...I just don't know why you're mad...."
"...And I have no idea how to make you feel better.... I just... I just don't know how else to make things up to you..." She burst in tears
"Wait, hold up, it's nothing to cry over."
I've never seen her cry like this...
"I don't know what to do anymore... Even if it's me who was the problem...."
"...I need to know what it is if I'm going to fix it."
Shit! Her face is too much, I can't get angry at her with her face like that.
I Sighed and, "Don't Cry.. I'm sorry.."
.."I don't know how to explain this but just calm down for now." I pat her head and she looked at me.
"Does that mean... We're going to do it?"
What?..
"You still haven't given up on that?"
"But I think it will feel good and I...I want you to have my first..."
I can't believe she's still talking about s*x in this situation... It's just so far from her actual self.
***
A few minutes after calming down, I break off the silence and directly asked: "So, tell me, Why are you doing this really, all of a sudden?..
"…I don't want to tell you," she averted her gaze to the side.
"You can't say that after dragging me in like that, can you? I have the right to know."
"I don't care."
"Don't be such a child."
"I bet you see me as some kind of slut now!"
Kira pursed her lips.
She was now sounding queerly like a precocious little girl. Where did the bewitching girl go that seduced me?
"Fine! I won't ask anymore if you don't want to tell me."
I thought there was no use questioning her in that thickheaded state.
"…Do you really want me to tell you?"
"…Which is it now!"
Good heavens. As always she was hard to read.
Kira took a deep breath and made up her
mind.
"I'll be honest. It's because.. Shina told me that you've been cheating with me when I was gone and doing it with someone else's, she's been berating me to break up with you and shouldn't get near you..."
"..." I was silent, I couldn't say anything, although I couldn't believe what I just heard from her, she seems serious.
"'Is it really true? That you have been..."
That bitchy Shina, What the hell did she tell her?!
"Huh? Just because of that.." Shina Rika, that bitch, what a pain in the ass she is.
"But still, you shouldn't believe what other people told you, she was just joking you know." I flicked her forehead and she cares for it as if she was in pain, though I guess It really hurts.
"Really, she's just joking?"
She squinted at my eyes as if to peek into my heart
"Did you really not did it. If you did it with someone then you could also do that to me!"
"Argh!" She groaned after I flicked her forehead for another time.
"I told you I haven't done such thing. Forgot what she said, she's just joking."
...
"Then .. Matsuki are you not happy if I call you by your name? I mean would you prefer darling or babe or something..."
Now she's changing topic.
"Call me whatever you like." I bluntly said.
" Heheheh.." She smiles brightly, "But you know, I like you, Matsuki, even if you are cruel and mean to me," laughed Kira while brushing her hair. It was a gorgeous demeanor. "How can I explain it…? It is just so enjoyable to be with you."
She carefully chose her words, which made me realize that she was trying her utmost to convey her feelings precisely.
"You could say that we are… trying to outdo each other? Our conversation feel so exciting and enjoyable to me because they're unpredictable."
"Huh? what's so exciting about it? Me yelling at you?"
"WelI, fighting is one of the couples do from time to time, hehehe...I feel like we're becoming more like a husband and wife.."
Her words silenced me, and caused me to stare at her. I was struck by surprise that she think of our relationship like that.
"When I imagined how stimulating every day would become us being together, so I wouldn't mind" she shook her head, "I wanted you to have my first time."
To make matters worse, she looked even more attractive now that I had become conscious of her. I've heard subjectivity incorporates a function that applies a filter to the brain that makes you interpret things in your favor.
"I didn't know I was so bold." she leaned close to me and gently hugged me.
"And I wish I didn't know that you were so sharp tongued."
I shrugged extensively for show. Of course, I was not at all composed. It was quite the contrary: I was disturbed. You could say that I had a hard time dealing with the radical change of my feelings.
I had previously regarded any situation objectively with the utmost effort in order to bear up against Kira and her staggering presence. Otherwise I would have fallen victim to her charm like everyone else.
However, now that subjectivity had mixed into my view, I couldn't remain calm anymore. My awakened instincts told me to savor the defenseless fruit before my eyes.
"I'm leaving."
This time I seriously had to leave or I would end up loathing myself.
"Don't you want to check?"
I heard Kira's voice behind me when I was walking towards the living room door.
"Check what?"
"—Whether it really would have been my first time or not." Huh? The hell's wrong with her today?
I felt the urge to turn around, but I chose to remain on course.
She would have surely shown me a devilish smile that very much met my preference and ruined my newly gained determination.
"Please forget what happened today. I wasn't myself."
"I don't want to," she declared.
"It's in both our interests." I said, determined.
"It's a valuable memory of us, after all this is one of the best memories since the time I finally found you. My destined person."
"I'm stunned that you can use that phrase so carelessly. Say that again in ten years."
"I am not using the word carelessly. Didn't you know that every girl is searching for her 'destined partner' from the moment she is born?"
"Well, my sympathies for all the trouble."
With that parting shot I opened the door. In that instant, I heard footsteps rushing towards me resounding on the flooring.
"Are you really leaving me?"
…No use using such lonely words.
"Of course."
"Even though I want you to stay so much?"
…No use using such pleading words. I repeated in my head.
"Well, I want to go home as fast as possible."
"You really are shy, Matsuki," she said, smiling.
I spontaneously turned around and glared at her. " Huh? I don't wanna hear it coming from you who trembled when I started touching you!"
Kira laughed heartily at seeing my unwilling attitude.
…Please, let me go already.
"Goodbye."
"Hehe..See you at school on Monday."
Even though I intentionally stomped on the floor to express my bad temper, I happened to see her sad and weak wave goodbye. It would be a lie to say that I didn't feel anything while closing the gate.