The sky was populated with more clouds on this day. They were not heavy nor dark but were such that even an inexperienced sailor would deduce that their mood could change at any moment, making the weather take a turn, whether good or bad.
Unlike today, the last few times when Lucas organized outings to test the feasibility of his plan, the sky was blue or with sparse clouds. He had wanted to check on those occasions the obstacles waiting on the way and whether he could boast about having the conditions to overcome them to reach the objective.
As for the sea, it was windy unlike the calm of the previous expeditions, announcing that maybe the transportation he was on would also have to overcome its own trial while waiting for the plan to be implemented. If he was superstitious, he would think that the world was giving him a message.
Actually, the only reason he persisted and didn't turn around to come back another day was because he would feel better the sooner he was done. Just the few days spent preparing while feeling like an unoiled machine were unbearable. The sole motivator of his patience was the lack of a second chance in his endeavor. Either he succeeded and lived with benefits or he failed and died.
As he stood on the ship, Lucas was looking at the rough display of the force of nature. Even then however, it didn't lose its beauty, nor its majesty. He had always liked the sea, being in awe of its strength and inclusivity, of its depth and vastness, of what it stood for.
He focused on it as he thought of what had happened till now, what would happen going forward, his plans, other people's plans for or against him... He seemed to go in a trance then, the vessel following the chaotic rhythm of the up and down of the ocean while his legs seemed nailed in place, his body instinctively balancing itself.
He felt the sea, his mood fluctuating with it and his mind transcending his body, becoming deep as it embraced a new vastness. At the peak of the new sensation, he went from outside to inside, as if his soul was abruptly pulled back into his body, leaving the sea outside and feeling the actual state of his inside.
He went through his skin, feeling it dense but still a little rigid, rigidity he didn't know the extent of previously. It was strong, not that he didn't know that yet. He then felt his muscles, but apart from a little cold, he mostly felt them cumbersome, with their form limiting what they were capable of.
In between the different components of his body, his arteries, veins and blood felt lacking, suffering just from existing, for staying normal when the neighbors were evolving, like a malnourished child among bullies under steroids.
As for his bones, they were light yet strong, emanating a little heat. They felt like an artwork with the way they were arranged, a mathematician's wet dream, projecting a sense of perfection and balance just by existing, a geometrical prowess. It was not the general kind but the kind that was suitable for him, pushing him to the apex of what he could be, allowing him to express part of his physical capabilities to the utmost.
He then felt his organs. They were in a worse state than his arteries, veins and blood. That explained why after the desert he couldn't really eat and even after Antarctica, that trouble was still there.
He was going to delve deeper but suddenly, the uneasiness he felt some time ago came back stronger. His heart started palpitating, struggling to make him function at full capacity, feeling that to be the only way to fight against what that feeling represented.
He heard a muffled sound, like it was coming from somewhere he was separated from by water. His muscles tensed, making his organs cry in pain, his bones adjusted themselves like some machine parts preparing for the whole to start at full blast.
"...s..."
"...kay~?"
"Are you okay?"
This time he heard it. He was breathing heavily and he felt a hand on his chest as he processed what the feminine voice was saying.
"Lucas, are you okay? What happened to you?"
It was Estrella that was talking. She had her hand above his heart as she raised her head to search for an explanation on his face. Quite uncharacteristically, she was not calm or expressionless. Her face was showing concern, at least that was until she noticed that he was somewhat back to normal. She took a breath and regained her usual unruffled state.
As Estrella took back her hand, Lucas was breathing heavily, calming himself and bringing his body parameters out of the fight or flight zone. He returned to looking at the sea, trying to understand what just happened.
"Are you alright? What happened?"
Brought out of his musings by Estrella, he turned to her and was amazed by her beauty even as she tried to be low-key. Maybe that was the woe of every beautiful woman. No matter what they do or how they try, their beauty would stay like a lighthouse, blinding the surroundings and outshining everything, even their own worth beyond that.
That made him think of Christina and he smiled gently at the memory. After having his state of mind straightened, he reflected and while recognizing that he had been attracted by something in Estrella, not just her beauty, and still was, he wouldn't simp after her. He was an old friend with loneliness and a hollow heart, so if anything was to come out of their proximity, it would be because of mutual effort. For now, he would just enjoy her company, support her as she healed from her scars, and if the spark was to become a flame, make plans for two instead of considering a lonely life.
As for why he went on a date with Christina? With how many times he flirted with death in a short lapse of time, he needed to unwind. And they both knew that it was a one time thing, even if it was beautiful, even if they would have liked it to be otherwise, afterward.
Focusing on the worry he was the object of:
"Don't worry, I just made a trip with my mind. I'm alright now."
"Was it fruitful?"
"Indeed, it was informative. I'm quite the perfectionist you see, but even with my mild OCD, I don't know if I will entertain that kind of pursuit this time."
While he didn't show anything outside, he was feeling uncertain inside. Since he didn't look like he would elaborate, Estrella didn't didn't continue asking questions.
They stayed side by side, enjoying the noiseless calm and the unpolluted winds full of humidity. As they strayed more and more from the shallow waters, Estrella didn't stay silent anymore.
"Can you tell me what we are doing in the Pacific now? You went out a few consecutive days previously, what were you making preparations for?"