As soon as Kanna messaged me, my sense of alert immediately snapped.
The last time I saw her was before my confrontation with Ema.
After that, i never saw her again, not even trough the streets.
She wanted to talk about something…
That "something" was Ema.
I was curious , but i was also conflicted if I had to accept her invitation.
So, i replied to her message by texting "Why do you want to talk? About what?".
The reply came instantly, and it said:
"Well, about your situation… i heard that you and Ema broke up and that actually breaks my heart."
As I thought, she wanted to talk about Ema.
My thoughts were still drifting to her and I couldn't get her off my mind.
Deep down I wanted to know where she was during the day, she even skipped the school.
"Yes, okay. Do you want to meet now?" I texted.
Immediately, another reply.
"I'm already outside of your house, come out."
"What the…" I said.
That really surprised me.
I looked out of the window and saw Kanna standing there , wearing a light yellow shirt and a skirt.
I sighed and then walked out of the house.
My mother and my little brother were sleeping, so all I could do was sneaking out very carefully.
I opened the door and closed it softly.
Then, i took some steps to go near Kanna.
When she saw me, she ran towards me and hugged me.
I was not expecting something like that from her, and i didn't know what to do.
I tried to push her away since i was feeling some sense of unease but she put more force into the hug.
"Please, let me stay like this for a while." She whispered with a sobbing tone.
I didn't return her hug.
She was on the verge of crying.
"Kanna? What is happening?" I asked after some seconds of silence.
"I'm sorry, Fumihiro… I should've told you sooner… I'm sorry for my sister. She doesn't deserve you." She said, before pulling herself away.
"Can you explain yourself, Kanna?" I asked.
"You come in the middle of the night outside my house, you call me for talking, you hug me out of nowhere and now you say sorry for your sister? What is wrong with you?" I said, with a glimpse of annoyance in my voice.
"Yeah… you're right, you deserve some explanations." She said, still with a sad tone of voice.
"She told me that she cheated on you… she told me that it wasn't true, but I always had my doubts… yesterday she returned at home and my parents yelled at her since she didn't say anything about coming at your place…" Kanna said.
"And then?" I asked in curiosity.
I wasn't feeling pain anymore. My heart was empty.
"Then, she said that she broke up with you with a malicious grin on her face. She said that she didn't love you anymore, that you're a loser… a lots of bad things. I felt so sorry… but deep down I knew that she didn't mean any words of what she said…" Kanna said while tightening her own arm.
I kept listening to her words, trying not to show my fragility.
"I'm sorry for what she's done to you, Fumi." She said while gently bowing her head.
"She's evil, she doesn't deserve you. I know that you're feeling a lot of pain but please don't hate her. I promise that I'll make you happy." She then raised her head and tried to smile at me.
Her mouth was shaking and she was trying her best not to cry.
She wanted to make up for what her sister done to me.
It was such a beautiful gesture by her… but also pretty egoist… in some ways.
"Kanna… I… I'm too wounded to think about healing. I only think that i need some time alone. If I don't learn how to live by myself, I won't make anyone else happy." I said with a sad tone of voice.
She remained silent at my reply.
"I think that maybe my destiny is to be alone. I don't think that I deserve anything. I'm a spineless boy who didn't have the force of saying what he thinks until now. I don't know why you're here now… I'm nothing special." I said , with a resigned tone of voice while taking a quick look at the sky above my head.
"If i had more courage , maybe Ema wouldn't have cheated on me…" i said.
"Fumi… you did nothing wrong. You only were yourself…" Kanna said with a lovingly tone of affection.
"It's not your fault. It's Ema's fault. She's the one who made you suffer. Simply , she wasn't made for you… and i always kept defending her… i feel so bad…" Kanna added.
Her words were "bothering" me in some ways.
I kinda didn't want to hear anything about Ema.
Only the sound of her name could make my heart squeeze into my chest, causing me a pain that I felt deep down my soul.
I knew that i still loved her and that i wanted her with me despite what she did to me… and i felt weak.
I gave myself all the blame for the situation that happened.
"It's my fault, Kanna. Every action has a consequence." I said to her with a broken smile.
"No… Fumi… it's not…" she tried to say.
"Kanna, you're making a lot of confusion…" i said.
"I'm a weak, pathetic boy who never thought about anything else more than himself. I should've thought about Ema way more, I should've done more… I don't know…" I said.
My tears even finished. I felt the urge to cry but I was to tired to do so.
"Maybe I am," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper.
"But I'm serious, Fumihiro. I don't want to see you suffer anymore."
I looked at her, trying to read the emotions in her eyes.
There was a sincerity there, a genuine concern, but also something else—a hint of desperation.
"You can't just promise to make me happy, Kanna. It's not that simple," I said, shaking my head. "Besides, this isn't about you. Right now I can't be happy. I'm not allowed to be happy."
She looked down, her fingers nervously twisting the hem of her shirt.
"I know, but I care about you. I really do and i always did… since you came into our family.. And I think… I think I've cared about you for a long time."
My breath caught in my throat. I wasn't prepared for this. "Kanna, what are you saying? What do you mean?"
She took a deep breath, as if gathering the courage to speak.
"I'm saying that I've always liked you, Fumihiro. Even when you were with Ema, I couldn't help it. And now, seeing you hurt like this, I just want to be there for you." Kanna said.
Tears were falling from her eyes and her body was trembling while her fists were clenched.
I didn't know if Kanna was saying the truth and honestly I didn't care.
But despite that, her revelation actually shocked me and my eyes were open wide in disbelief.
Kanna actually had feelings for me. She admitted it.
In that moment, I remembered the scene where she confronted Chiko in the cafeteria,
Chiko said something like "your beloved Fumihiro."
That's what he probably meant…
I felt a mix of emotions—confusion, guilt, and an unexpected flicker of warmth.
I felt so many things to explain.
In some ways, it was nice to see that someone cared about me, but on the other hand, I was still focused on my pain.
I wanted to learn to live by myself, without relying on others.
"Kanna, I don't know if I can—" I tried to say, but she interrupted me.
"Just let me be here for you," she interrupted, her voice pleading. "I'm not asking for anything more. Let me help you through this. You don't have to be alone." She said.
"I only want to help you, Fumi. Nothing more than that." She added.
She sounded desperate and… sincere.
Kanna looked at me with such an intense expression and her eyes were literally speaking for her.
They were telling me "No matter what, this is what I'm gonna do."
The sincerity in her voice made me pause.
I was still reeling from my breakup with Ema, my emotions were still raw and tangled.
But Kanna's presence, her offer of support, felt like a lifeline.
A positive feeling formed in my heart.
I was relieved to see that Kanna was here to offer me her support… but just like Suzuki , I didn't know if she was doing that for egoistic purposes or because she only wanted to make me feel better for a genuine reason…
It was too hard to distinguish these things…
All i could do was to surrender her requests.
"Okay," I said finally, my voice softening. "Okay, Kanna. But I can't promise you anything... I'll try my best to live again."
She smiled.
A small, tentative smile that barely reached her eyes , and then she wiped her tears away.
"That's all I ask." She said while looking at me with a loving gaze.
We stood there in the quiet night, the tension between us slowly easing.
I still felt the weight of my heartache, but for the first time in days, there was a small glimmer of hope.
Perhaps, with Kanna and my friends' support, I could begin to heal.
"I wish you good night, Fumi." Kanna said.
"Good night to you too. Send me a message when you arrived home. Don't make me worried." I said.
Kanna nodded and then turned back to walk toward her home.
Luckily our city was the safest in the world and the path towards Ema's house wasn't so long.
As we walked back to my house, side by side, I couldn't help but wonder if things would ever be the same again.
Ema's betrayal had left a deep scar, but maybe, just maybe, Kanna's presence could help mend it.
Only time would tell…
I had so many things to do and learn about life.
A new chapter of my life was gonna start.
Maybe Ema was the one who was restraining me from living…
"Who knows…" I said to myself while gently laying down on the bed.
After 15 minutes, I received a text from Kanna.
"I'm at home now. Good night again, Fumi." The text said.
I softly smiled at the telephone and texted her "Good night, Kanna. Thanks for sending me a message"
I didn't receive a reply, so I thought that she fell asleep very rapidly.
Then I put my phone away and finally drifted to sleep… a new day was waiting for me…