It turns out that learning Burning Heart Energy Circulation took more out of me than 37 points in vitality could make up for. If it wasn't for a preset alarm going off at 9:00, I would have likely missed my trip to the mall to meet with Punisher. I had an alarm set for 9:00 on the first of the month to remind myself to get a money order for rent, but that was going to be the least of my problems today. I would have to pay for three months rent in advance, which I don't have. I'll be rich soon enough; the first season was full of rare materials that I already knew about.
The clock was ticking, and there were only three hours separating me and a million other humans from entering the Verdant Abyss. I hopped into the shower to clean up a bit before heading out to the mall. Once my shower was done, I started writing a note for Punisher to read when we would inevitably get separated at 12:00 today. The note was only half finished when I looked at the time and saw that it was already 9:45. It was only a ten-minute drive to the mall, so I hopped in my used Dodge Grand Caravan and sped off.
It was 10:05 when I made it to the mall, and Punisher was already standing outside by the fountain at the front entrance. He shook his head at me as he watched me park my car and get out.
"Dude, you're always late," he said. "That's gonna be a real problem in the future when you get a real job."
I shrugged. "Welcome to Hero Burgers, home of the super fuck you burger. We got a lot to do today."
Punisher laughed. "What do you mean?"
"Remember that time that you killed my Orc Paladin by accident when I was playing in permadeath difficulty?"
"...Yes? Don't tell me it's so serious you're bringing up At'tak Crushface..."
I cringed a bit at the name before responding. "Oh yeah, it's this serious Pun. You're caching in this favor today."
"Shit, what do you need me to do?"
"I just need one thing from you. I need you to listen to me and not think that I'm crazy."
Punisher squinted his eyes and looked at me suspiciously before nodding his head. We both walked into the mall, and I led him towards the food court as I began my explanation.
"For this favor, you need to at the very least pretend to believe everything that I say. Can you do that? At least pretend to believe me for today."
"Okay, I can do that. If it means that you never bring up the incident with At'tak Crushface again, we're good. I can have an imagination for today."
"Good." I paused and looked at my watch to check the time. "It's 10:15 right now. In exactly one hour and forty-five minutes, we will be transported to another world. You, me, and about a million other people randomly selected around the world."
Punisher looked visibly confused, probably thinking that I had gone insane. His mouth was open, and his eyes were looking around as if he were doing some kind of mental calculation. After a few seconds, he nodded for me to continue.
"There are god-like beings that are bored as shit and created a competition called the Five Seasons where they put different worlds against each other in some kind of sick, twisted battle royal. We are one of five different species from five different worlds that will be competing against each other starting at 12:00 today."
I could tell that I was losing Punisher, but it was alright as long as he listened. We arrived at the food court and sat at an empty table. I spent the next fifteen minutes explaining how the Five Seasons worked and how our world was going to be destroyed if we didn't clear the final season. During the whole explanation, Punisher's face looked as though he was forcing an understanding look onto his face. I could tell that he was trying his best; he really wanted to stop me from bringing up the orc paladin again.
After hearing my explanation, Punisher took a beat and finally responded. "Okay, I will pretend that everything you said is true. In about an hour and a half, you and I will be transported to a magical world called..."
"The Verdant Abyss."
"Riiiiiight... And a bunch of other people are going to be there too. About a million others, and everyone is going to have some kind of system, like a video game, that allows them to view their stats, skills, inventory... Game settings..?"
"No game settings, unless you want to change the brightness or opacity of the status window. Oddly enough, that is an option."
"Okay... And when we get to the Verdant Abyss, which is where the first season is located, we will have to either completely wipe out our competition or survive to the end with more points than them?"
"Exactly." I nodded with this response, proud of Punisher for having paid so much attention to my explanation so far. His dedication to the bit was great, and I know that if I were in his position, I wouldn't believe anything I was saying at all.
"And there are five seasons, just like this. You'll tell me about them later, but we're on a time crunch, so we have to shop for... Survival equipment and food?"
"Yes. And shoes." I looked down at Punisher's feet. He was wearing a pair of red, white, and blue slippers. I remember how funny it was watching him during the first month of our time in the Verdant Abyss in my past life running around fighting monsters in those.
"Okay. I'll buy into this just for today. I'm pretty sure that this is just some unnecessary, over-the-top way to get me to go camping with you."
"Sure, let's go with that. Let's get started, shall we? I need to wrap this up by 11:30. Also, you need to promise me that you'll have all your camping equipment and shoes," I pointed down at his slippers. "On you at all times; do not take anything off or drop anything until after 12:00."
"If it makes you feel better, I promise." Punisher nodded.
We shopped for everything we would need for basic camping over the next hour. We picked up tents, sleeping bags, headlamps, camping chairs, multi-tools, duct tape, solar powered chargers, and many other essential items I thought we would need. Additionally, while Punisher wasn't looking, I purchased several hunting knives and machetes for myself. I knew Punisher had his open carry on him at all times, so he was going to be just fine when we got to the first season. He was going to get the same legendary ability that he got last time.
I looked at the list I handed Punisher earlier. I had him handle most of the snacks, and I wanted to make sure that he got everything I had asked him to pick up.