Chapter 17 - You are the King

She sat by the open window, sketching the view in her delicate strokes on a paper. While she noticed my arrival, didn't get up like the etiquette ordered her. Instead, she greeted me with a soft smile.

"Milana mentioned you would be coming this morning. Is something wrong?" Her question carried a hushed concern.

"I have some free time right now, and I long to spend it with you. May I?" I asked casually and stepped a little closer. She nodded.

"You're the king. Only God is above you. You can do as you please." She said and then turned back to the painting.

As I settled down, calmly opening a book on my lap, curiosity emerged from her. "Doesn't that bore you? Having everything, answering to no one..." She questioned as I stretched out in the lounge after reading for a while. I leaned back comfortably, leaving the book spread out beside me. 

"I can't have everything I want. And I answer to my own conscience. I have to keep living with myself if I decide to do something wrong. Tell me, is everything to your liking? Is there something I can do to make you feel at ease?"

She shook her head, "I have everything I could possibly need. I just miss my brothers and my late husband..." She said softly and looked up, but got startled when she saw my surprise.

"He was my friend from an early age." She explained quietly and continued: "But he loved other men instead, unable to fulfill the role of a husband. He passed away two years ago, and I returned to my family as a young widow after years of unfulfilled marriage..."

My impulse took over, instinctively blurting out, "May I kiss you?" 

A complex combination of relief and raw terror consumed me as I revealed my true desires, unable to suppress the longing any longer. 

Valleria paused, her eyes widened in confusion. "What?" she asked, struggling to understand my motives. Swiftly, I rose from my seat, approached her, and planted a fleeting kiss on her forehead. 

Mumbling under my breath, I thanked her for her honesty before hastily leaving her room, unwilling to let my self-control be overtaken by the powerful grip of lust.

My heart pounded and urged me to return back to her room, just for a little more. An embrace maybe. Then a kiss followed by the unavoidable loss of my boundaries.

"Training. Now." I poked my head into Isaac's room and waited for him to join me, my body craving the physical exertion as a means of distraction. Despite my bleeding hands and soaked shirt, I knew I needed more.

"Not enough already?" He asked breathlessly, "It's getting hot, I'm sweating like a dog."

"No, not yet." I stubbornly refused despite my hands slipping in blood from the blisters and sweat.

I collapsed into bed and drifted into a deep slumber, every inch of my body aching. The next morning, I frantically searched for her, ignoring my duties. Valleria, not to be found in her room or at lunch, left me anxious.