Nathanael doesn't have the slightest trace of burden on his features as he comes back into the cabin, Kevin's arm hanging around his shoulders for support. He makes carrying Kevin's entire weight look so effortless. The boy isn't even trying to stand on his feet, they're just being dragged along on the floorboards as Nathanael is advancing towards the couch where he delicately settles him.
Looking closely at him, I am relieved to see that even under strained conditions, my eyes did not play tricks on me. The boy is definitely seventeen-year-old Kevin Brown.
"Are you alright?" Nathanael immediately asks me after turning my way.
"Don't ask me! I am as alright as I was when you left me here. You're the one that went out there. How are you feeling?" I retort, my eyes traveling between him and Kevin.
"I am… Fine. Thank you for asking," he answers me almost instantly, but not before displaying the tiniest and most short-lived air of disbelief on his face. It was there and then it wasn't, "Can you try to talk to him?" he quickly wards my attention off of him and back on Kevin.
"What? Why me?" I ask a bit perplexed, "If you think this matter requires a human touch, then trust me, you look just as human as I do. Not to mention, he doesn't know about you,"
Yes. Why me? indeed. The only creatures I've been able to have meaningful conversations with before Nathanael, were bacteria and fungi… In a lab. Kevin seems to be in a totally different realm than the one we stand in. His entire body is shaking like a leaf in a stormy winter. His eyes can't seem to decide on one place to land and stay on for longer than a second. I can't even begin to try and imagine what he must've gone through when he was chased by the kelpies. All of the thoughts that must have run through his scattered mind… The idea that he was probably running to his doom, the notion that nobody was coming to save him. All of that sheer terror and despair are still present and very much visible in his teary eyes.
What can I possibly say to this boy so that my voice will reach him, wherever stranded he is? What does Nathanael even expect me to say here?
"I was just thinking he'd respond better to you and that maybe, he'd feel less threatened by you," he says simply.
"You're the one that saved his life," I reply, a tad defensively.
"Yes, but considering he just saw me frighten away six monsters from hell that would have skinned him alive, I'd say he's not going to trust me for a good while, at least not until the dust settles in his head,"
At those words, Kevin whimpers a little louder.
"They would've skinned him?" I find myself sidetracked by his latest statement.
"No, but he most certainly thinks they would have," says Nathanael, but then he adds, "Besides, you said you know him, I figured you'd know what to say to him,"
I take a deep breath, look back at Kevin, who is still staring into nothing in particular. The longer my gaze lingers on him, the more I feel this surge of courage and determination. A number of words that I think would be a good opener, start lining up in my mind. I can do this… I believe.
I slowly walk towards the couch. I make sure to sit as gently as I possibly can in order not to spook Kevin further than he already is, "Hey… It's Kevin? Kevin Brown, is it?" I practically whisper.
To my surprise, he actually does recognize his name and responds to it. He slowly turns his head to face me, "Y…Yes," he whispers back. He sounds like he had to fight for that word to come out.
I nod agreeingly, an uncomfortable smile on my lips… Nope, I can't do it… I turn back towards Nathanael and hastily get off the couch, leaving a bewildered Kevin behind me as I go, "There! I've done my part. You can talk to him now," I cross my arms on my chest in a triumphant manner.
I can feel Nathanael's eyes on me, as I stand by his side, but I refuse to look at him right at this moment. I can also tell that my face is draining the rest of my body out of blood, judging by how warm it feels compared to the rest of my limbs.
To my relief, Nathanael doesn't comment on my recent actions. He just averts his focus towards Kevin and starts approaching him the same way I did before.
He crouches down to Kevin's eye level and tries to calm him down, "Kevin… Everything is alright now. They are gone, and they are not coming back. You are safe," he lowered his tone and made it as soft as can be. His voice was charged with the hints of care and concern it had when he saved me from the wolves yesterday and then again when he came into the cabin earlier today.
If I can just cut the crap for two seconds and be completely honest with myself, then I'd be able to address what I'd been shoving to the back of my brain all this time. Like the fact that I am ashamed… Ashamed that I couldn't find such simple words to soothe this kid's fears; that I couldn't just look him in the eyes, smile and tell him that everything was going to be fine. It pains me to admit it, but the only things I am able to connect with using words are the dry pages of a book I can open and close whenever I please. I know how to put words together in a manner that makes someone think a certain way of me, I know how to use words to get answers I need out of someone, but for the life of me… I could never use them to make someone feel better, to make someone at ease… That's one thing that not even my relationship with Izzy was ever able to teach me how to do. I mean hell, I can't even communicate my boundaries to her effectively…
"What… Were those things… Out there?" Kevin's quivering voice brings me out of my own ponderings.
"Just a bunch of assholes who think Halloween happens every day of the week," I pull myself together and throw that in response, seeing as Nathanael took a second too long to come up with a plausible answer.
"No… No, you didn't see them… Those… Those weren't just some Halloween costumes… They- they were real! I swear!" Kevin grows agitated with each word that he utters.
"Kevin…," I start but Nathanael interjects before I can finish.
"We believe you, it's okay. It's fine. As I said before, they can't hurt you anymore,"
My heart skips a beat at Nathanael's words. What the fuck does he mean by we believe him? He's not even going to try and keep things under wraps? At this rate, their entire existence will become nothing more than an open secret.
"Are they… The ones causing the disappearances around town?" Kevin speaks again.
He sparks a new flame of interesting questions for me to ask, "We don't know, but why are you in the preserve anyways? How did you get here?"
"It's ok, you don't have to answer that question immediately," Nathanael interjects again and this is probably the first time I ever feel unhappy to hear his voice.
"He doesn't have to, but he can… If he wants to. Especially since his memory is still fresh and all…," I do feel like an asshole. I know I am being an asshole, but this might be the only chance I have at getting answers about the disappearances. I don't know what Nathanael will do with him, but I know that he's not just going to let him walk around town, telling people about what he saw in the preserve.
"What about you? You're here too, aren't you?" Kevin asks.
"Well, we look just fine, don't we? We were not the ones being chased by… God knows what. So, what brought you out here?"
"It's fine. You can just rest for now, you need it,"
I am not sure if Nathanael is doing this on purpose to keep him from answering my question or if he's legitimately just being considerate towards him. The first case scenario is quite concerning, since that would mean that he knows what draws people to the woods, to their demise and their… community or whatever, isn't really doing anything about it. Worse yet, he can be in cahoots with the perpetrators. The second case scenario is the one I am hoping for to be true, but I am not holding my breath anymore.
"I heard a voice," Kevin admits and pulls me out of my thoughts.
"What?" Nathanael looks at him attentively.
"All I remember is leaving my friend's house and then hearing this… Voice… A woman's voice, I think. It was so beautiful, so…," he trails off, looking mesmerized by something neither I nor Nathanael can see. Then he continues, "After that, it's… Just a blank in my mind. I can't remember how I walked into the forest in the first place. These people that were chasing me just appeared out of nowhere, it's like they weren't there and then a moment later they were there. I don't know how to explain it more than this,"