Jane Tong stood in front of the plain white door for a long time, and finally, reaching out, pushed the door open.
"I do not eat." House a hospital bed, Jane Mo Bai description withered, these days, he lived in anxiety, want to live the desire to make him struggle in the disease.
But too much pain too much pain, but also with the passing of time day by day, more and more desperate.
Struggling with illness and despair, he wanted to live, wanted to live to enjoy the lights and wine, back to the carefree days of the past.
Mrs. Jane all day in tears, Jane Mo Bai can not see all day there is a person in their own side to wipe tears, sighing, Mrs. Jane recently also sick, Jane Mo Bai but relieved to be able to let this day in front of their eyes sighing people, leave their own heel.
Only the housekeeper will come to send food, Mrs. Jane for her son, hired the best caregiver, 24 hours a day, taking turns to shift, care of her son.
Jane Mo Bai has seen enough of this four-sided white walled house, when awake, he looked out the window, the former spirit of the eyes, but also only gray.
The door quietly opened, he subconsciously thought it was the housekeeper of the family again to deliver something, the body with medication, long time chemotherapy, long ago let the mouth has no taste, eat anything is bitter.
Nowadays, as long as he wasn't so hungry that the inside of his stomach was empty and uncomfortable, he didn't want to open his mouth and swallow any food.
Because of the weakness, even talking was not very willing anymore.
Not to mention, when someone pushed the door in, he was willing to turn his head to look.
Jane Mo Bai leaned back on his bed and looked out the window witheringly.
That is, until a dark shadow loomed in front of his bed.
Although he was weak and unwilling to waste more than an ounce of strength, the thin face, but also still vaguely revealed boredom.
Yes, tired, tired of these healthy, then a caring face of people ... If he could, he preferred to do the latter - healthy body, and then a face of sympathetic pity to pity others.
"Get out." Jane Mo Bai's breath was weak and vaguely annoyed, "I am sick yes."
"If the body has been sick for a long time, is the heart also sick?"
A rough female voice, faintly sounded.
As if Jane Mo Bai was stimulated, half of his body stiffened in a meaty way.
He slowly turned his head, but from the window to the bedside, with the knowledge learned in elementary school math, but it is just a forty-five degree angle, his look, but a qualitative change.
Raise his head, look up at the bedside of the silhouette, for a long time, he laughed mockingly: "You are to see me dead or not?"
Bedside, the woman does not speak, without a word, pulled aside the reclining chair, sat on the bedside, eyes swept over the back of Jane Mo Bai, she got up, picked up the cushion from the sofa, pulled Jane Mo Bai's upper body, without a word will be the cushion cushion in the back of Jane Mo Bai.
"What for? Sympathize with me? Pity me?"
Jane Tong looked at the person on the bed, sunken cheeks, staring for a long time, only to be able to vaguely see the former dashing and handsome features, if so a glance over, she was almost not able to find from the crowd, once so Jane Mo Bai to.
She stretched out her fingers and lightly buttoned up Jane Mo Bai's patient suit.
"Do what?" The latter hair white pursed white lips, a face of vigilance.
The woman dropped Jane Mo Bai's hand on the back of her hand, gently, but unquestionably unbuttoned Jane Mo Bai's coat, the collar slipped, revealing the shoulder, a faint wound, the wound has healed, but still left a hideous scar.
"Do you still remember, this scar, how did it come about?" The woman's rough voice, slowly sounded.
Jane Mo Bai's shoulders trembled, the scar that was rubbed by Jane Tong's fingers, rolling so hot that he instinctively wanted to avoid it.
"If you're here to reminisce about old times, then you're excused. I'm dying and you want to reminisce about the past with a sick person?"
Jane Tong ignored Jane Mo Bai's sharp and mean words, gently rubbing his fingertips, ignoring Jane Mo Bai completely, and continued to speak on his own:
"When I was a child, grandfather was still around, I grew up in front of grandfather."
"You want to show off that grandfather favored you more again? Jane Tong, grandfather is dead, and you have long since lost the grandfather who favored you to the bone."
Still ignoring the mean words, the woman continued:
"At that time, I envied you.
Mom and dad loved you and loved you... At that time, I was small, I didn't understand anything, I only thought that I had done something wrong, that's why mom and dad didn't like me.
So I desperately wanted to be good, I thought, if I was better than you, then mom and dad's eyes would focus on me, from you.
Actually, I'm pretty dumb, and my grandfather says that you're smarter than me, but I'm not convinced. I learned things when you were playing, and I didn't know what worked and what didn't.
At that time, when I saw anything, I thought I had to learn it, and if I learned it, I would be good, and if I was good, my mom and dad would love me as much as you did.
That's what I thought, and that's what I did.
But later, I am more and more outstanding when I found, mom and dad more and more do not like me, I just know, in fact,... mom and dad do not want me so outstanding.
I am not convinced, you are mom and dad's child, I am also.
I'm not convinced, so I gambled like, make myself more busy into a gyroscope, to learn more things.
I also comforted myself with the thought that it didn't matter, mom and dad didn't love me, but I still had my grandfather.
At that time, my grandfather was the most important person to me.
One of the things that made my life worth living for a long time was to be affirmed by my grandfather, and that made me feel that I was worthy and loved in that family.
It wasn't that no one loved me.
Knowing that one time.
One time, Grandfather said, actually, your brother is smarter and more talented than you. And I saw the expectation of you in my grandfather's eyes. I realized that grandfather didn't love me more.
But what does it matter? Grandfather loves me, that's all."
Jane Mo Bai went from not daring to believe, to gradually listening in silence.
In the hospital room, the only thing left is that coarse female voice, slowly but with its own rhythm, telling its own story.
"But I hate you even more, I once thought that you stole mom and dad, you already have mom and dad, why do you still want to come and steal my grandfather, I only have grandfather ah."
The woman seemed to be telling a story that was not her own, she seemed to be telling someone else's story as if she were a bystander.
"Do you remember this scar, how it came to be?" She raised her eyes and landed on the scar that had turned brown, her index finger gently caressing it.
Jane Mo Bai is too weak, his face is like white paper, wriggling his lips, for a long time, before he said, "I forgot ..."
On the bedside, the woman laughed softly, "When I was in elementary school, I hid my family history, and then enrolled in school and was bullied by the upper grades.
Then you found out, you caught me and dragged me to my own bedroom, and you also rudely uncovered my clothes, revealing the scars under those clothes.
Jane Mo Bai, I realized at that time that you handled the wounds so well.
You treated my wounds and threw me out of your room.
I was afraid that you would tell Grandfather so that Grandfather would be disappointed in me and think I was useless.
As a result, I was scared for a whole day, and when I saw that Grandfather didn't blame me, I believed that you hadn't told on me.
Then there was a long period of time where I came home every day with a wound and you caught me every day and threw me into your bedroom to treat it."
The woman's fingertips were slightly hard, pressed on the wound on Jane Mo Bai's shoulder: "This wound of yours, was injured in a fight with a social punk, was injured in order to block that knife for me. Then I thought, my brother is very powerful, my brother will protect me."
Jane Tong asked the opposite side of Jane Mo Bai: "Do you still remember, when you were fighting, what did you say?"
Jane Mo Bai's eyes twinkled.
Jane Tong continued:
"You said: my sister can only be bullied by me, no one else can."
The woman finished her statement.
On the bed, Jane Mo Bai pursed his whitened lips tighter.
"From that time on, I didn't hate you quite as much. Because I know that not only does my grandfather love me, it turns out that I have a brother who will protect me."
Jane Mo Bai sniffed, his shoulders trembled, I don't know what came to his mind, his gray eyes, more than a trace of a different emotion, he fiercely buried his head, almost buried into his chest.
"We were clearly good before." Jane Tong to the spoon of the brain in front of her, there is a sentence, she blocked in the throat, eyes gradually red, before choking and asked, "Why did we become like this today?"
Jane Mo Bai fiercely grasped the bed sheet under the body, the heart poofed poofed out of speed jumped up.
Strange ... clearly, nothing to eat, how the mouth is more bitter and more bitter, he froze and stared at the bedding on his own body, his eyes are a little dull up.
"That said, no one else can bully my brother, where did he go?
That brother who I once thought, was my protector, why the more we grow up, the more we change our appearance."
Jane Tong asked with red eyes, even after experiencing less than desirable, she did not have red eyes, even after just experiencing Shen Xiu Jin's expiration date, she was still able to maintain the most basic demeanor.
Jane Tong also felt strange, obviously she was already indifferent, obviously she was already a master of emotional control, obviously she had long been cold and wooden, why did she have red eyes.
"Grandfather gave you everything." For a long time, Jane Mo Bai said with a weak breath.
Jane Tong stared at his eyes for a long, long time ... because of money?
Because of power?
Because of glory and wealth?
"I'm actually jealous of you too." Jane Mo Bai was gazed at by those eyes that were filled with too many emotions he couldn't accept, his scalp tingled, finally, he also said the psychology that he had never stated in decades:
"You say that Mom and Dad cared for me, but every time I saw Grandfather's hands-on guidance for you, it was clear that I was the eldest son of the Jane family, but in Grandfather's eyes, there was only you, not me.
I am greedy to play, grandfather won't stop, you play for a while, grandfather has been ear to ear.
So I was even more playful, and I wanted my grandfather to pay attention to me.
I couldn't figure out why Grandfather was so nice to you, but ignored me like that. As I grew older, I became more concerned about my grandfather's care and teaching, but he never taught me himself.
The older you get, the more jealous you become, and you don't even know about it."
Jane Tong eyes a trace of surprise, this is the first time she so quietly put aside any prejudice, carefully listen to Jane Mo Bai this hidden in the heart for a long time.
Until Jane Mo Bai finished his story, a touch of light sarcasm seeped out of Jane Tong's eyes:
"You are wrong.
Grandfather did not give me everything.
Grandfather was alive, more than once, sternly told me, Jane family, is your brother Jane Mo Bai.
Grandfather gave me 'only love', said, 'only love' how you do, can do big, then you will have a place in Shanghai Bund.
If you fail, you will only have a dowry.
Jane family, will not give you.
This is grandfather's own words."
Jane Mo Bai couldn't believe what he was hearing.
He raised his head violently, looked to the bedside, touched the familiar face, with the same unhealthy pallor as him, and in a trance, he saw eighteen years old, was springing to life, with a face like peaches and plums, and a confident and flamboyant Jane Tong ... that was his sister!
"You ... have long known grandfather his heart?" Jane Mo Bai throat knots rolled slightly, "Then why do you still care about grandfather, even if grandfather passed away, still because of grandfather, from erhai back here?"
Jane Tong gently hooked up a smile, but in his eyes was a rare tenderness, gazing at Jane Mo Bai:
"Because I, only have grandfather ah. I know that grandfather's care, there is a price, but, I still enjoy it. And grandfather passed away, I was able to know the truth, still lie to myself."
Her eyes flickered with a light that Jane Mo Bai couldn't understand, so complex: "More than never having any care, I prefer to deceive myself."
Jane Mo Bai pupils contracted violently, at this moment, after an absence of more than ten years, he actually for the eyes of this sister who was once a thorn in his flesh, and once again, the pain is difficult to speak.
Little Tong did not say, she once thought for a time that she would protect her brother, but forgot the promise promised to her sister, only left the jealousy of her sister, and under the jealousy, deliberately ignored her sister ... Jane Mo Bai abruptly closed his eyes.
That scar on his shoulder, rolling hot rolling hot, later in the decade, he had long ago put this scar, and other fights on his body left scars the same way to look at, but just a scar.
Now, today, but now than at that time when that knife stabbed in, more painful and more painful.
Jane Tong looked deeply at the hospital bed, cheeks sunken, eyes closed, painfully wrinkled brow Jane Mo Bai, looked for a full half a minute, she slowly took out the bag's cell phone, when she opened the phone, jumped out a series of missed, and many text messages.
Only a cursory scan - it was the man's.
She then silently slid across the screen and tapped into her address book, the number that she knew backwards and forwards, in fact, there was absolutely no need for her to tap on her address book.
Her thumb tapped that number, and after two rings, a, "Hello Ms. Jane," came from the other side.
"I would like to ask to see if the chances of finding a suitable person for my brother's bone marrow match, are very, very small?"
The other party was silent for a while before saying like a machine, "We are still following up on Mr. Jane's match with all our might, Miss Jane, we believe that as long as you don't give up, even at the last minute, there is a chance to turn the tide.
Miss Jane is so concerned about her brother, I believe there will be a miracle."
Jane Tong lowered her eyelashes ... Believe in miracles? How different is it from having no hope at all?
"I'm calling today because I want to formally inform your party that there's no need to keep looking. We have already found it."
"Found it? Impossible, we are the largest and most authoritative organization in China, with all the formal channels, we won't miss it if we can find it."
"Regarding the fee, I will have someone settle it with you."
"It's not the matter of fees ... Miss Jane, you guys wouldn't be looking for a black workshop, right?
That's against the law ..."
"Please rest assured, we don't do illegal things, it's not a black workshop, it's a regular channel."
"How is that possible ..."
She already did not want to say more, unilaterally ended the call, let the female voice on the phone eagerly, was mercilessly cut off.
Jane Mo Bai did not know what he was feeling at the moment, lost in thought and looked at the person by his bedside ... had thought that she was too impersonal, too cold-blooded, only to realize that, privately, she had already done so much for him, only, she never said.
Jane Mo Bai mouth more and more bitter ... Yes, his sister - Jane Tong, never boast of their own merits, only do not say.
He remembered his mother s curse in his ears again, cursing his sister to be heartless, cursing her black heart, cursing her not to die well.
"Little Tong, I ..." He wanted to say something, but he couldn't open his mouth.
"Brother, you will live." She smiled, and stood up.