And more time, about two weeks putting us at the beginning of December rolls on and I'm still living the good life. Well not good but better than I was. People keep asking me how Jenna and I are doing but it's less now. Beth has been avoiding talking to me at school and even at home. Abby is trying to figure out what is the deal with my new relationship, her words not mine. I've been set up to go out with Mark to the gym since my cast came off after seven weeks of being stuck on me. Mostly however it's Jenna and I. We smile and laugh and I keep things cool on my end even though I'm shaking. People see us together and I think she's made peace with her ex Brandon, I've seen them talking a little here and there but as soon as I'm around she's with me and it's our time. Monday of the first week in December and I'm at a bit of a nervous point in my relationship. Every time I've gone out with Jenna she's asked me. Mostly that's because she has been busy with her modeling and photography but the Winter Formal is coming up and while I know she's getting ready I figure she's been waiting for me to ask. I catch her at lunch and there is Brandon just hanging around as Jenna pulls away and comes to be with me. We don't get very far when I figure I should bring up the most pressing subject of my week.
"So Winter Formal is coming up Saturday," I tell Jenna like she doesn't know but she does.
"Oh yeah, I'm absolutely ready for it," Jenna says with a smile and I smile back this will be easy.
"So did you want me to pick you up, I can rent a car or limo? We can arrive in style," I ask smiling and she doesn't share my enthusiasm.
"Pick me up," the high school supermodel asks.
"Yeah, we've been going out together for a month now and I'm pretty sure taking my date to the Formal is something a man needs to plan for," I am stating facts that I'm not sure I should be.
"We've been hanging out for a month but date? I can't go with you Brandon already asked me," Jenna says it and I don't think I have feeling in my legs.
"Brandon? Your ex Brandon asked you and you said yes," I don't know if I'm asking or clarifying.
"Well we started getting back together over a week ago and when he asked I told him yes and were all official again," Jenna is saying the words and I honestly wish for Hector to come drag me off to a beating.
"So what about us," I ask and actually dread the answer.
"Us? Oh you're so sweet and such a good friend. I know you were looking out for me being single and all but I'm back with Brandon. We're meant to be together and he finally came to his senses," Jenna says it, I hurt and she doesn't even stop," Don't worry about me Guy, I'll be alright and we can go have dinner Sunday after the dance, just us friends, okay?"
I watch her get up and walk away, probably back to Brandon but where I'm at right now is empty. I thought I was empty before when I had nothing, now I have nothing. All plans I made to stay in the area were for her… us. Now there is no us. There never was an us. I was her fool and she played me. I head to my last classes of the day and do nothing. I sit, stare blankly and exit to the next class until school is out. I am walking through the parking lot to get to Abby's car but pass it only to finally get stopped by Abby who catches up to me and guides me back to the passenger side door and helps me in. I'm aware that people are watching me confused, some are talking and some of them I even know the names of but for the life of me I couldn't care. I thought I was strong with not caring before but now I know the true emptiness. Abby brings us home trying to talk to me the entire way but I don't answer her, I don't even grunt or nod. I sit there and feel hollowed out. Abby helps me out of the car and almost immediately when I get inside Mom is there and she is concerned. They talk about what happened to me today, Abby doesn't know and Mom is trying to ask me questions as I walk dead but towards my room. Once in my room I lie down on my bed and stare into space, or more accurately the blank spot on my wall. Yeah, life loves sucker punching the shit out of my plans, hopes and dreams.
Mark Delauter Sr.
Just when I believed that things might actually be coming together as a family and something screws with Guy. The therapist isn't earning her pay and I'm scheduled to tell her as such after her last session with Guy and Bethany; nobody can convince Guy to sit down with her. Doctor Hill is a highly recommended family relations specialist but I am beginning to believe that Guy needs a developmental specialist. Specifically one that specializes in cases of neglect. I love my wife but I don't know if she can see how much neglect her son grew up in and how devastating it has been on his emotional reactions. It's been two days now since Guy's remains silent and does nothing. The vigil began and I don't know when it will end. If he were just being lazy and playing video games all day or screwing around I'd be fine with it but he's just laying there and doesn't respond to anyone. Even Doctor Hill gave it her best to reach him but all she said was something set him into this state and when he came out let him come to us. I'm not that passive and have all three of my children back in my office again only this time everyone knows why they are here.
"We need to do something about Guy and this null state he seems to be in," I tell my children from my desk chair.
"I could drop him in the pool, he'll swim out to keep from drowning," Mark, my muscle head defender, offers and I shake him off.
"Mark, we need to get him out of bed and into the shower, then we can change him and bring him down to eat," Abigail offers her idea and I give them the nod.
Two of my children step out of my office leaving only Bethany behind who quietly decides to step out of the room.
"Beth, take a seat," I offer my daughter who freezes at the door," Close the door first."
I let her close the door and wait for her to take her seat before I begin. She's scared and while she has reason to be this is not the time for her fear, this is about Guy.
"What do the other high school students say about Guy," I ask her and she pauses for a second.
"Mostly they talked about how he is part of the family and has been following around Jenna like a puppy," Beth explains and I remember the girl, a hot commodity for high school.
"So did anything happen on Monday? Anything you heard about that could have triggered something like this," I ask and she fidgets," Beth if you did something tell me now otherwise if there is something that happened we need to know so we can try to help him."
"Jenna brought him to reality," my daughter says and if it isn't evident I have no clue what she's talking about," Guy has been running around school after her for a month doing everything and calling her his girlfriend, he tried asking her to the Winter Formal and she gave him the bad news that she's back with her boyfriend Brandon. Everyone knew they've been back together for a couple weeks now and she finally just gave Guy his passport."
"Passport," I ask confused but more understanding of the situation.
"Yeah, to the friend zone where all girls put boys that they like kinda but don't really like at all," Bethany explains and I shake my head.
"So did you know that Jenna was back with her boyfriend while Guy was following her around love struck," I ask and Beth nods," Why didn't you tell him?"
"Because he's dumb, how dumb do you have to be to see that he was never in Jenna's league? Dad he wasn't even in Jenna's sport and the fact that he never got anywhere with her could not have been a bigger sign that she wasn't interested in him," Beth explains and I don't get my answer, yet.
"If she wasn't interested in him why take him out to dinner and all those dates they went on," I already know the answer but I'm looking for confirmation.
"Because all Jenna's money is in college and her modeling. Brandon doesn't have money and is praying for a scholarship this year to get into college so Guy was perfect for her to get a little of the good life," Beth says and it dawns on her what has been going on.
"So why didn't you say something if you knew all this was happening," I ask and she shakes her head.
"Because he hates me, Guy does," I hear her say it but Guy has never shown anything to support it," Dad you don't see it but it's there every day. He's always watching me waiting for me to do something to him. He sits around when he isn't out with Jenna looking at everyone here. I'm sorry but he's going to do something and it scares me sometimes."
I shake my head at my poor daughter; she can't see anything beyond her own selfish ways. I move to the chair in front of my desk next to her and she knows something is different. All punishments are handed out from behind the desk, now I'm in front of it.
"I've seen him watching all of us but he's not angry or hurt. He's scared," I say it and she shakes her head.
"Dad you got it all wrong," Bethany begins and I stop her.
"I will finish, for over three years that young man has had nothing. We all went about our lives smiling and laughing all the while where was he? He was there watching and when he tried to get close we shut him out. Sometimes it was an accident," I state the facts for my daughter," and sometimes it was intentional. He was nervous because in our family he didn't know his place and when you forced him into the position you did."
"Daddy I've apologized to everyone and to Guy if he'd come to a session again and listen about that. I was wrong and I tried to get him out of his shell with the Halloween party but he just doesn't want to. He hates me and can't forgive me," my daughter explains her side, interrupting me.
"Yes Bethany, you tried once to be his sister. Once and when it failed you went back to quiet denial. And as for the therapy sessions I don't know if Dr. Hill is the best person for Guy considering she's done almost as much to drive him away as to help bring him out of his shell. What is wrong with Guy sounds simple; Jenna gave him hope and a plan. Everything he's done in the past month was for her and now she's pushed him aside, just like the rest of us did for years. If I disowned you right now and kicked you out how hard would your life be," I ask Bethany who pales at the thought.
"I'd be homeless, Daddy are you kicking me out? I've tried with Guy," Beth pleads and I cut her off.
"I'm not kicking you out, I'm making a point so you understand. If I disowned you your life would be empty. No family, no money, no home and no good living yes," I ask and she nods," Emotionally that's where Guy is. He had none of us he could confide in when he was hurt. Nobody to learn from when he needed help and certainly nobody to explain to him when a gold digging girl is screwing him over to the amusement of the school."
"Daddy she's a friend," Beth begins and I end it.
"Anyone who would use this family is not a friend; she's not even an acquaintance. She went out of her way to use your brother and you allowed it to happen," my words seem to have an impact as some realization hits my daughter," I'm sorry Bethany but if everyone here is trying to bring this family back together as we agreed that we would do and include Guy how are you doing your part?"