Koneko was skipping class.
Rias knew. She offered no chastisement when told, pulling the more petite girl into a firm hug and letting Koneko know she was always available if she needed to talk.
Koneko hadn't wanted to talk.
She had wanted sleep.
Sleep that had eluded her for weeks.
The nightmares, the fear, it all prevented her from getting any rest.
Nee- Kuroka had no right to come back. She had no right to prance back into her life as if she had never left. She had no right to leave Koneko feeling scared, confused, and betrayed all over again.
Sometimes, the dreams were about the good times, brought back by warm arms and a familiar scent.
Most of the time, Koneko dreamed about a promise left unfulfilled, about being left behind.
Those were the worst because they weren't dreams. Just memories.
Mad with power. Corrupted by Senjutsu. That was what Koneko had been told about her sister's abandonment.
She had believed it.
Kuroka was certainly powerful now.
A six-tailed nekomata was almost at the pinnacle their race had ever reached. Combined with her already prodigious magical talent, enough to have needed two Bishops to reincarnate her, Kuroka was at least in the upper ranks of the Ultimate class if she was able to go toe to toe with Grayfia Lucifuge.
For a few minutes at least.
Neither had been using their full power, so Koneko didn't know where Nee- where Kuroka stood compared to Nee-san.
And that was the other source of Koneko's nightmares.
Kuroka had seemed... sane.
Powerful, certainly, but in control. Kuroka was so in control that she hadn't hurt anyone.
According to Issei, all she had done was join Vali when he and Mikasa were teaming up against him. Kuroka had used him to bash through the wall of ice but hadn't even hurt him enough for him to feel it.
And she had been able to fight the Strongest Queen. If Vali was keeping Mikasa busy, Kuroka could have killed Issei in a second.
When Kuroka had talked to Koneko, when she called that old name, held her close, and apologized, Kuroka had seemed perfectly, maddeningly sane.
Exactly as Koneko remembered her older sister being.
Which terrified Koneko.
Because she needed Kuroka to have gone mad.
Because it was the only thing that made sense. Only then could Koneko understand why she had been left behind.
If Kuroka hadn't gone mad, then Shirone had truly been abandoned.
The thoughts kept her up at night, tossing and turning. When she finally fell asleep, it was only to be awoken by the nightmares again.
After weeks without proper rest, even her Devil biology had been strained to limits. She was falling asleep in class, her training was going nowhere, and even her appetite was smaller than usual.
The others tried to help. They really did.
Asia tried to use her Sacred Gear on her almost daily, despite that not being how Twilight Healing actually worked.
Rias, Akeno, and Yuuto tried to get her to talk to them or offer what support they could. Xenovia thought training hard enough would put her right to sleep. Gya-kun had offered her one of his cardboard boxes... a tempting offer, to be sure, but one that hadn't helped.
Even the pervert had noticed and taken it upon himself to take over a few of her contractors.
They were all kind, but they weren't what she needed.
Koneko needed sleep. Sleep uninterrupted from long dreams.
So here she was, skipping school and sleeping in the only place she could.
On a supremely uncomfortable bench and an unfairly comfortable lap.
Koneko didn't know what it was about Eren's lap that just... relaxed her. Maybe it was because of how often they would go without saying a single word to each other. Or it could be because of how often he would join her in napping.
He had never said, just as she never did, but Koneko thought Eren had nightmares, too. It was the only reason she could think of why he slept as much as he did on the bench instead of in his bed at his house.
That silent comradery was... calming? Peaceful? Trustworthy?
Koneko didn't know the exact term, only that she liked it, and it allowed her to fall asleep on the older boy's lap and rest in a way she couldn't anywhere else.
Even knowing how much Ki was right beneath the surface was oddly... reassuring, in a way, like a warm fireplace to curl up by.
His blindness and the wards on the area meant she could fully relax and let out her ears and tail, something she hadn't realized had been contributing to her stress until she had started sleeping with them out.
Eren never touched her, and if he did, she'd just tell him she was wearing a headband, so she wasn't worried.
So Koneko spent the last day of the spring term before they left for the underworld napping on Eren's lap.
He had said nothing when she had joined him instead of going to class, just giving her a nod in greeting and letting her smaller form curl up against his leg, head on his lap.
He remained there, in silence, for hours. Just letting Koneko get the sleep she needed.
She did not dream.
When Koneko awoke in the warm afternoon sun, she was feeling better than she had in weeks.
She stayed there, eyes closed, luxuriating in the clarity of thought and the comfortable pillow.
The bench was still awful, though.
Fully rested, if still bleary, Koneko decided she was hungry.
With an absent thought, her tail reached down and brought her bag to her, careful not to brush against Eren. A cat ear headband was one thing. A tail would be a lot harder to explain.
Koneko rummaged around her bag, pushing books and pencils to the side to grab the food container. It was larger than most, but that was for good reason. Not only did it contain her lunch, but also the snacks she would munch on throughout the day.
Tossing the bookbag carelessly aside, Koneko opened it to root around for something appropriate when she froze.
There, on top of everything else, was a bag of homemade cakes.
That wasn't rare, as Akeno sometimes included treats like that for dessert when she made the Peerage's lunches.
These were not Akeno's cookies, however.
Akeno made deserts in the traditional Japanese style. Good, but without embellishments.
These came from Yuuto.
They were fancy, with an artistic flair that Akeno never used. They were some made jam, with frosting, with cream. There were brownies, macaroons, cookies, maple cream, and all sorts of others. And they were all shaped like little cats.
A small note was attached to the bag, written in Yuuto's precise handwriting.
'I hope you enjoy them and you feel better.'
Koneko didn't know when the Knight had snuck in the treats, but she was suddenly overcome with a surge of... something.
Something strong that made her eyes water slightly.
Memories of Rias, Akeno, and Yuuto welled up, and Koneko allowed herself a smile.
She rubbed the dampness away and held out a small cat filled with cream to Eren.
"Cookie?" She asked the boy who had remained completely silent until now.
He nodded and took it, munching on it as Koneko sat up and started devouring the treats with a much greater gusto.
"Thanks," Eren said as he finished the snack. "Yuuto's?"
"Yes," Koneko answered before holding out a cat-shaped chocolate chip cookie. "Another?"
Eren gave it some thought but eventually ate the sweet treat slowly.
They stayed like that for a few minutes, munching away in companionable silence.
After she had finished the snacks and the actual meal in the bento, Koneko stared at that little note the Knight had left.
"I have a sister."
"Hm?" Eren made a noise of confusion at the sudden utterance.
"She left," Koneko said simply, staring at the note. "Abandoned me."
"...I'm sorry."
"Rias took me in. She was kind. Her family is kind. Akeno, Yuuto, Gya-kun, Asia, even Xenovia and the pervert are kind. You are kind."
"...I'm not-"
"You asked if I was happy," Koneko interrupted his words. No doubt they'd be wrong. Eren was kind to her. "I am. I am happy. But my sister came back."
"And that makes you unhappy," Eren let out a sigh. "You cannot forgive her."
There was so much more than that.
Kuroka had killed her King. She was a Stray devil.
Even if she wasn't insane, which she very well might be, she was still a criminal. One in league with a terrorist organization that had attacked the peace conference.
"...No. I cannot."
A part of Koneko wanted to be happy, was happy, to see her sister again. The part that had worried for her and secretly prayed for her return every day for months after she had left.
But Kuroka brought so much pain, confusion, and betrayal back with her.
She had been gone for years. Years when Koneko had needed her the most.
And she walks back in with more power than ever and as a terrorist, promising they'd be together again.
It was all... too much. Too complicated. Too painful.
"Don't then," Eren said casually.
Koneko blinked, having been momentarily lost in her thoughts and not expecting such an answer.
"She hurt you, didn't she?" Eren asked, sensing Koneko's confusion. Koneko nodded.
Then Koneko realized she had done it again.
"...Yes."
"Whether she did it on purpose or not doesn't matter," Eren said, tapping his cane on the ground in thought as he spoke slowly. "We sometimes hurt the ones we love. On purpose or on accident. It doesn't matter. All that matters is the pain was real. Your sister came back? Then it is on her, not you, to fix things."
"...What if I want her back?" Koneko asked softly. Guiltily.
She had been happy with her life. Even after Kokabiel's attack, she had been recovering. But a part of her would always miss her sister, the sister who had cared for her when their mother died.
Koneko feared Kuroka.
Feared what her sister had become and what it meant for herself. Feared that the Black Cat would take her away from the family she had grown to love.
But you can still love someone who hurt you.
Conflicting emotion roiled and churned within her breast.
"She still hurt you," Eren shook his head. "Do not let her hurt you again. She has to be the one to start fixing things. Only you can decide when it is enough. When you can trust her to not hurt you again. She starts, you finish."
Koneko didn't know if she could ever trust her sister again. Not after everything. Not when she continued to use Senjutsu and threatened to take her from her new family.
Kuroka had said she wouldn't. Yet.
But Koneko could not trust the Black Cat to keep her word.
And she was still a terrorist.
Who knew what she was planning or who this 'brother-in-law' was?
There was just too much unknown.
Still...
"Thanks," Koneko said softly. "For listening."
Eren frowned softly and let out a sigh as he turned his head towards a sky he couldn't see.
"I had an older brother," he confessed.
"...What?" Koneko asked.
"We didn't know each other until we were older," Eren shrugged. "Different mothers. When he found out about me, his first goal was to reach me. To talk. We were on different sides, different armies, but he still wanted the best for the younger brother he never knew. He risked his life to 'rescue' me as he saw it."
"What happened?" Koneko couldn't help but ask.
Everyone had been slowly piecing together what they knew of Eren's past, Sona especially, to try and line things up with verifiable times and places, yet nothing fit together with what they had found.
The names he mentioned were not part of his former mercenary group, meaning they were probably child soldiers like him. Yet their names were Germanic, not consistent with his time in Africa. He was an orphan, yet he had found his parents and done something that led to their death.
Now he had an older brother?
Nobody thought Eren was lying to them. The emotion was too raw, too painful for it to be lies, yet there was a disconnect here. A missing link that would tie everything together.
Any time Eren spoke of his past, it was a rare, precious thing. Only once every few weeks or months, it not only provided another piece to the puzzle, it also gave them a better grasp of who he had been before... this.
Before he had been exiled to die alone on a bench in Kuoh.
And, a small part of Koneko whispered, Eren only used his past to try and help them. So they would avoid what he saw as his own mistakes.
Those were not the actions of a liar.
"I betrayed him," Eren sighed again. "In many ways, he was the better man. Our father was not kind to him, yet his first response to finding out I lived was to try and save me from what he thought were similar circumstances. I think... I think he did love me. He did everything he could to bring me over to his viewpoint. To be a good big brother. And I used it against him. I manipulated him, fought him, and did the one thing he sought to prevent. His plan was a travesty I would never agree with, but mine was worse. We fought. I won. And my comrades killed him, as I knew they would."
"...Did you love him?"
"...I don't think I did," Eren admitted. "It was too late by then. Not only had he killed many of my comrades, too many, but I was set on my path by the time we really got to talk. If I had told him my real plan, he would never have agreed, just as I couldn't agree to his. We were both two very different people. I didn't love him. But I could have. In another world, one less cruel, one where we grew up together, I could have loved my big brother."
Eren turned, facing her directly.
"I have never been in your position," he admitted. "I have been in your sister's. Both with my brother and with my real family. I hurt them both. Intentionally and unintentionally. One brother, the one I was related to, I didn't love. I used him. The other wasn't blood, but I loved him like a brother. The former, I did not seek forgiveness from. The latter? I begged. I pleaded. I cried. I wanted to be understood. Even though I didn't deserve it, I wanted to be forgiven."
The situations were different. The scale was larger than Eren could understand, involving peace between factions, terrorism, and grudges that had their roots millennia in the past. Powers a mortal could not understand.
Yet Eren's message, spoken with such regret, guilt, and love, carved itself in Koneko's heart.
"Find out which of these two your sister is, then make your choice. I can't make it for you. All I can say is that if I had the chance, I would still be begging for forgiveness from the brother I loved."
Koneko didn't nod or say anything.
She just wrapped the older boy in a hug, letting him know without words that she understood.
They stayed like that till it was time for Koneko to leave, waiving one last goodbye to Eren before she left for the summer with the rest of her friends.
Then she hurried away in embarrassment, realizing she had done it again.
Eren was left alone as the sun set in the park.
"Are you going to come down now?"
"Nyahahaha," Kuroka giggled as she dropped from the tree, shifting back into human form. "How'd you know?"
"I sensed you," Eren said simply. "A while ago."
"Ara? You managed to learn sensing?" Kuroka asked as she sashayed over to the bench.
"I've had a year to practice," Eren deadpanned as if saying that even he could learn something with that much time. "I've been waiting for you to do something for weeks."
"Like what, nyaa?" Kuroka asked as she nuzzled up against the blind boy.
"Vali attacked me as soon as he saw me," Eren shrugged. "I thought you'd do the same."
"Nyaa?" Kuroka hummed in confusion. "You should have seen I'd never hurt you."
"Vali didn't tell you," Eren asked with a head tilt. "While I'm on this bench, I can't see anything. I am blind."
Kuroka's eyes widened, reaching for that familiar connection with her Senjutsu.
It wasn't there.
She could still sense Eren since she was touching him, enormously diminished as he was, but she could not reach out further.
The Path was closed to her.
"Are you..." Kuroka hesitated, tails whipping back and forth in agitation. "Are you okay?"
Sitting here, feeling how weak Eren had become, Kuroka could not help the fear and pain that gripped her heart.
Her Titan looked so... fragile. So frail.
And yet...
"It's almost time," Eren acknowledged. "I don't have much time left."
Kuroka closed her eyes in pain.
Eren had never kept his short life a secret from her, as he did their allies.
He had done it to dissuade her when she started ramping up her attempts to win him over fully. He tried to never lie to her about the true nature of their relationship. All it had done was spur her on.
Eren said he would never have children, but Kuroka was determined to prove him wrong. If he was wrong about that, he could be wrong about his death.
"I'll keep my promise," Eren reassured. "It is only when I am here that I can't see the Path. Everything else will go exactly as planned. It's already happened for me."
That wasn't what she was worried about, this stupid man.
Kuroka burrowed her head deeper for a second, taking in the long, familiar scent and reassuring warmth.
Then she sat up.
She would change the future. Eren wouldn't die. He'd live a long and happy life.
And they'd have lots of kittens.
As always, the idea of Titan Nekomata sent a trill of humour, wonder, and pleasure down Kuroka's spine.
Giant kittens pawing around the underworld, chasing massive balls of yarn and causing earthquakes as they tumbled around.
Screw dragons, that would be the strongest race.
Speaking of kittens...
"Thank you," Kuroka said softly, leaning against Eren's shoulder. "For taking care of Shirone."
Eren just nodded as if it was the expected thing to do.
"Still," the Stray Bishop couldn't help but pout. "You could have gone easier on me. Couldn't you have told Shirone to accept her Nee-sama back?"
"You hurt her," Eren shook his head. "You had good reason, but you still hurt her. You must make up for it if you want to be a part of her life again. I promised you the chance. Everything else is up to you two. I can't see that far."
"You're such a serious man, nyaa," Kuroka complained playfully.
"One of us has to be," Eren nodded severely. "You? Bikou? Or the Ramen Dragon?"
Kuroka froze, staring at the boy with eyes wide in shock.
Had Eren... made a joke?
She couldn't help it.
"Nyahahahahahah," Kuroka howled with laughter. More than the joke itself, the unexpectedness and the relief had her laughing and laughing.
Eren bore with it, not smiling or even acknowledging his attempt at humour, but Kuroka knew him best out of anyone in this world.
She saw the way his shoulders slacked, the looseness on his face, and the way his face slightly angled away in the slightest hint of embarrassment.
Kuroka had been scared. Scared that Eren had gone off to die. That he had disappeared, never to be seen again.
Kuroka had been scared that she would never learn what happened to the man she had come to love as he, in his stupidly headstrong nature, had advanced to some future she couldn't follow.
Kuroka had not heard one word about him for over a year despite looking all over the world and the underworld for him.
To find out he had never left Kuoh after she asked him to check on Shirone... It was as infuriating as it was worrying.
He looked worse than ever.
Of the young boy who had destroyed a Devil lineage just to meet with her, only a sickly man remained.
Yet, after watching him for the last few weeks, Kuroka had realized something.
Eren was... better than ever. More whole. Still dour and severe, still Eren, but the edge was duller.
He was still walking forward, but it wasn't a mad dash anymore.
It gave her hope that she could finally reach him.
"Nyahaha," Kuroka's laughter petered out as she wiped the tears from her eyes. "Did you call him that, nyaa? Albion must have been angry."
Eren didn't answer, but Kuroka had enough fun imagining the scene that it didn't matter if he did or not.
Still, if Eren was going to be more open...
"Hey," Kuroka said gently as her giggles quieted. "Tell me about him."
"Hm?"
"Your brother."
"There's not much to say," Eren sighed. "Like I told Shirone, I didn't know about him till I was older, and we were on opposite sides."
"Not him, nyaa," Kuroka scooted slightly away from Eren and gently guided Eren to fall onto her lap, resting his head against her thighs as he had done for Shirone. Eren let her. Trusting her. "The other one. The one you loved. Did he ever forgive you?"
Eren lay there, facing the sky, as she ran her hands through his long hair. The bandages were annoying, but she knew their purpose, so Kuroka left them alone.
For a long minute, Kuroka thought he wouldn't answer. So many times, she had asked about his past. So many times, she had gotten nothing but silence for her efforts.
That was all right.
Eren didn't have to say anything.
Kuroka's curiosity was a strong thing, one that would never be slacked until she knew everything there was to know about Eren Yeager, no matter how long it took.
If he wouldn't speak now, if he didn't want to talk about it, Kuroka would wait a thousand years if that was what it took.
For what he did for her, what he would do for her, she could wait.
It was a surprise when he actually spoke.
"No," Eren denied. "He never forgave me. What I had done, would do, wasn't something that could be forgiven. Instead, Armin promised me something. He'd shoulder the blame with me."
"He must have loved you," Kuroka said softly, a rumble of purr escaping her.
"Armin was my best friend," Eren said quietly. "The smartest of us. The best of us. My brother in every way but blood."
Kuroka didn't say anything more, continuing to run her fingers through his hair as the sun set.
"I have so many regrets. Too many. I stand by my actions, no matter how much I regret them. It was needed. Of my actions, I would only change two."
The guilt was cloying in his voice as Eren grit his teeth.
"He promised to meet me in hell..." Eren paused, letting out a choking breath. "Being reborn in this world means I won't be there. When I go to hell, it will be a different one. I am not worried. He would never have gone to hell. I entrusted the world to him. There is no way he'd ever go to hell. He's too good. Too moral. Ultimately, he could not cast away his humanity, and I am so proud of him." Eren choked down a sob. "I just wish... All I wish is that I could have told Armin goodbye."
For all that Eren tried to appear emotionless and uncaring, rebuffing her attempts to sway his heart and showing a strong front, Kuroka noticed he had never let go of her gift as tears trailed down his face.
Eren's fingers rubbed the two wings as he lay his head on her lap, and they rested together once again.
The sun set on old friends and comrades finally reunited, as the pair spent a warm summer night on the bench.