*disclaimer: themes like depression are discussed. *
Rahua's POV
I don't know when I lost conscious, I must have been so scared out of my mind, because of the wolfs, that I actually did faint.
I feel dirty, I am exhausted. I steady myself against the tree, trying to stand up. I have to keep moving. Once I get home, I will take a shower, I will eat mother's food, I will play with Zack and Zoe. I will teach Kira to read more difficult books. I will hug father.
Tears run down my face as I walk, the dress is all ripped and torn, I am covered in mud, maybe dried blood from my arms. If I keep walking, I will be home, that's what I keep telling myself, to keep myself from give up.
I try to maintain any dark thoughts from accompanying me, but is hard.
Is all my fault for getting involved with the main characters of the story, that's why the story was all spinning out of control. "Stupid, stupid" I smack myself in the head. I guess it makes sense, now that I think about.
I am so hungry. I miss my phone.
Ahhh what I would give to listen to Amy L** voice, when I would get depressed, she was the one who would push me through.
There was a song that resonated deeply with me during that time, sung by Amy L**. Her voice felt like an angel speaking directly to all the sad souls in the world, specially to me.
Sometimes I would listen to her and wonder if she was singing about my own life, if she understood the pain and loneliness that consumed me.
There was someone that I was really close to.
Please, please forgive me
But I won't be home again
He was like a best friend, at least I thought he was. We worked together, we would hang out together, we flirted all the time, at least I thought we did.
Maybe someday you'll look up
And, barely conscious, you'll say to no one
Isn't something missing?
We would talk about books, movies, music everything.
Until one day out of nowhere I was confronted by some girls. They meant that I was messing his life....
You won't cry for my absence, I know
You forgot me long ago
They said he would not date anyone because he didn't want to make me sad.
Since he was supposed to be my only friend. Then he rejected me.
Am I that unimportant?
I guess they started to date, I don't know really, I died right after. At least I think I did.
Am I so insignificant?
I do wonder if ever thinks or remembers me. I chuckle "of course not."
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?
Even though I'm the sacrifice
You won't try for me, not now
Though I'd die to know you love me
I'm all alone
The same will be happening with Damion.
Isn't someone missing me?
Please, please forgive me
But I won't be home again
I know what you do to yourself
I breathe deep and cry out
He his probably dancing with his Princess, now.
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?
And if I bleed, I'll bleed
Knowing you don't care
He will get marry, and forget that I ever existed.
And if I sleep just to dream of you
And wake without you there
Isn't something missing?
Amy L**'s song continues to play in my mind, as hunger gnaws at my belly, I finally see lights I ran towards it, maybe I can get some help and be able to get home.
As I approach the lights, I realize I was back where I had started it.
At the main house, and this time I wouldn't be able to escape with so many people looking at me. As I grab the fence the thorns pierce through my flesh. A familiar pain that brings me back to reality. I take my hand off the fence, wiping away the tears that still stream down my face. I can't let them see me like this, weak and defeated. I have to put on a brave face, pretend like everything is okay.
As I take a step further, rushed steps from a figure is coming in my direction. I don't know, maybe I lost my mind, but I see Damion approaching me.
Damion, is walking briskly with purpose. My heart skips a beat, but I don't know, is my mind playing a prank one me?
I approach him, my steps hesitant. I could see his eyes widen in disbelief. "Rahua? Is that really you?" he asks, his voice filled with a mix of astonishment and relief.
I nod, and I collapse, still not sure if I was delirious "What a cruel prank life has set up for me. Damion, I thought I'd never see you again."
He embraces me tightly, and in that moment, I feel a sense of homecoming.
I could barely hear what he was saying, if he was even here. For the moment I let myself fall in the illusion that he come for me as my mind faded into black.