It's been two days since Ah Cy realised that she was alone now. Completely alone. There was no one left to go to. What use was her life now? No one needed her, no one loved her. She was alone. Homeless and broken.
Ah Cy sat in the car she had been in since she left her father's house, was kicked out of rather. She was still in the same clothes and hadn't eaten for days. All of these didn't matter to her. She was tired of crying, tired of thinking. She was tired of living. It was all futile. Her life was a waste. There was no use for her existence.
Fresh tears fell off her eyes as she thought of everything all over again. For some time, she had thought that the reason her parents hadn't supported her marriage to Lu Shen was because they cared for her, because they were worried about her, because they knew it was likely to not end well. That thought had been cleared now. How wrong she was! They had sold her off to someone she didn't know. How hurting was that? She was that useless to her parents that they married her off before she was even an adult. Why? Why was she so hated? Why was her life this way? Why did she have to feel so much pain all alone? So many whys and no one to give the answers.
Ah Cy felt her heart squeezing tightly. She had thought about it and there was no going back. She had to somehow relieve herself from the pain she was feeling. She couldn't take it. She just couldn't take it. It was too much for her to handle on her own. Her heart was fragile, it was already broken into a million pieces. Fixing it back up was almost impossible and the thought that there was no one to even try broke her even more. She had to end it. This life wasn't for her. She had made so many wrong decisions and all of them had backfired on her. She had trusted the wrong people, she had been so vulnerable and naive. If she had a second chance in life, she would make it right. She would undo all the wrong things she did and make her life a happy one. If she got a second chance. If! If wishes were horses, she would ride 'em.
She knew no one would miss her. No one would even realize she was gone. They'd probably hear on the news that a lady had driven herself over the bridge and that's as much as it'd go. They probably wouldn't even try to find her body. No one cared that much about her. They'd continue with their daily lives. Lu Shen would go on and get married to Chang Yang and her father would be glad he got rid of the worst thing that ever happened to him and her mother would pride on her success of a son and forget about her. That's just about it.
The thought that she wasn't needed kept haunting her and fueled her resolution to end her life. It was useless anyway.
With shaky hands, Ah Cy buckled up her seatbelt. There was no room for second thoughts. She had to do this. She couldn't live with the pain. At least she could say she did a favour to everyone by ending her life. If only she had a gun, she'd blast her brain out and wouldn't have to feel any pain. But she couldn't get a gun. This was her only choice.
Breathing rapidly, she ignited the engine and stepped her foot on the accelerator. Her trembling hands held tightly to the steering wheel as the sound of the roaring engine filled the night. The car jerked forward with so much speed, her head colliding with the windshield as the car broke through the bridge. She felt glass piercing through her skin as the car fell with a loud thud into the river. The seatbelt held her in place as the water filled the car. Her legs were kicking involuntarily and her hands struggled to hold something. The doors were all locked, the glass broken from the force of landing in the river. The water rose to her face and she struggled to breathe. The physical pain was starting to line up with the one she felt in heart. With each gasp, she swallowed in more water. It rose up to her nose and her kicks got serious. The seatbelt was very effective in keeping her steady. She couldn't escape even if she wanted to and that was exactly what she wanted. She was never even a swimmer in the first place. She would die anyway and no one would save her, no one would miss her.
Ah Cy could feel her consciousness slowly slipping away. Her chest was heavy with all the water she had swallowed. She could barely breathe. Every breath brought in more water. She was near to her death. This was it. Ah Cy, the unbelievably beautiful girl who everyone could say had a bright future had ended up committing suicide. Rejected by her parents, betrayed by her best friend and kicked out of her husband's house.
Lu Shen's face floated over her eyes in her unconscious state and a tear fell off her eyes.
" Goodbye world" she mumbled as she closed her eyes and her body went limb. Well… the end?