4 - Not Every Plan Works - OCIEN
With the decision made, nothing ties me to the world anymore, I don't have the courage for a slow death, I don't have access to poison or drugs to overdose on. My only way out is to climb the tallest tower to ensure there is no chance of survival.
The south wall is the most imposing in the city, its tower is more than 100 feet high. Despite appearing impressive to its inhabitants, Almage is just a low-level city, smaller than itself, perhaps just villages and their palisaded walls.
I opened the door to my house without bothering to close it. All my valuables are with me, just my bag of coins and the clothes on my back.
I just didn't leave the money behind out of consideration for those who find me, who might need it for cleaning or, if they're kinder, my burial.
I took the most direct route to the wall, different from my usual route where I avoid the red light district. Today nothing else matters to me, I just want to get this over with once and for all, before I'm too cowardly even for that.
Street after street, I advance at a constant pace until my eyes catch something that makes me stop my movements involuntarily.
It took seconds for my brain to confirm without a shadow of a doubt that I wasn't hallucinating.
On one of the emptiest corners in the red light district, holding a sign that read "Selling my virginity for 50 coins," stood a familiar figure from my past.
During her school days she didn't stand out from the crowd, but for me she had a special place. Reina was the only one who consoled me when I was expelled at the end of the year.
My inability to advance caused my career to fall from an Academy Apprentice to a student at probably the lowest school in the entire kingdom. Without friends or even close acquaintances among my colleagues, it was no surprise when no one cared about my expulsion, except her.
Suffering from a similar fate, she still had the spirit to console me. Even if it was some involuntary reflex of hers, it was the last time I felt the positive warmth of human emotions.
Five years since that fateful day.
My body shook uncontrollably when I saw her in this situation, I involuntarily started walking towards her without knowing why I was really doing this.
"Reina." – I called in a throat-scratching voice.
The chubby girl with black hair and fair skin gave me a look of confusion and surprise.
At that moment she turned red as a pepper.
I approached it in such a way as to completely block the sign from those passing by. Another behavior that I can't say why I did, but I just knew it was the right thing to do.
"Do you really need this money?" – I asked in a tone that only she could hear.
Reina froze for a moment thinking about the direction this conversation was taking. It took her a few seconds to gather up the courage and nod her head confirming the answer to my question.
"Did something happen for you to get to this point?" – I asked worriedly.
She changed her footing, trying to put aside the extreme discomfort that this subject caused, not only in her mind, but also in her soul.
"My father pawned our house and ran away with the money, I need to pay before my mother and siblings are left without a place to live." – Reina explained, still trying to hide her face.
I almost lost my breath for a moment.
I spent so many years being shunned, ignored and now abandoned by my family that even though I didn't know the exact feelings she was experiencing at the time, I knew it affected her in more ways than most people think possible.
"I have the money, you don't need to do this anymore." – I said, trying to console her.
Reina took a step back as if she was instinctively trying to get away from me.
Although she was prepared to do anything to help her family, when the moment came her body acted before she could think.
Seeing that scene I panicked.
We haven't seen each other for five years and the first thing I do is offer her the money she's asking for her virginity.
"I don't need the money, you can have it." – I said hurriedly in an attempt to clear up the misunderstanding.
Confusion filled her eyes. Something understandable, someone offering money when we need it without wanting something in return, when something is clearly written on that sign.
"Can we talk somewhere?" – I asked in the hope of putting an end to that embarrassing situation.
Reina looked around as if she were looking for someone, when she seemed to find the person she was looking for, she raised her head, catching the attention of a grim-looking man who was sitting in front of a fetid bar on the other side of the street.
My expression quickly turned to anger and disgust. Reina was clearly not there of her own free will.
She seemed to notice the change in my mood and quickly tried to calm me down.
"Please, he has the mortgage promissory note, you just need to pay him and receive the document." – she whispered in an attempt at a comforting tone.
I took two deep breaths and put my hand in the inside pocket of my coat where the coin purse was.
My anger might work on some child, but I knew deep down that anything I did other than give that disgusting man money would only put Reina in danger.
The man approached and I could see the greed in his eyes. I took five doubloons out of the bag and prepared to hand them over.
He extended his hand when he arrived in front of me, without thinking much I did the same, only with my left, while the money was in my right hand.
Eyes of a mouse in human form seemed to assess both Reina and me from head to toe. After a few seconds he opened the pouch on his left thigh and took out a piece of paper.
He lifted the paper to my hand and then I did the same with the coins.
The exchange was peaceful, but my heart was pounding like a warhammer in my chest. The veins in my neck and forehead were about to explode, from both anger and tension.
So, I passed the paper to Reina to confirm its authenticity.
"T-that's the one, it's all right." – she stammered nervously.
She pulled me by the sleeve and we got out of there as quickly as we could. I lost track of where we were going, all I know is that we turned corners three times before ending up in a modest but well-kept room.
Without many accommodation options, she made me sit on the bed, still unable to look me in the eye.
"Thank you." – she said after a Herculean effort.
I couldn't contain my smile for a brief moment. In the end, I managed to help someone.
"Don't worry, I don't need that money." – I tried to say that I didn't expect her to pay me.
Reina finally looked up at my face, she spent a few seconds analyzing me curiously.
"Is there something wrong with you?" – she asked with visible fear in her voice.
For me, all that didn't matter anymore, so no, there was nothing wrong.
I smiled as brightly as possible to try to comfort her.
"There's nothing wrong with me, I'm just leaving." – I replied in my most confident tone.
A strange glow seemed to pass through her eyes and before I knew it she wrapped me in her arms in a suffocating way.
"You just saved me, let me save you too." – she asked in a sobbing whisper close to my ear.
I had had more control over my emotions for so long that throughout this brief conversation I didn't notice how I was really communicating.
My cheerful smile was drooping and my confident voice was just plaintive. Unlike most people who reach the same point, I couldn't fool anyone with my half words and lies.
She knew very well what I was going to do.
I tried in vain to free myself from that hug, but there wasn't enough strength in my arms and legs due to the sequence of sleepless nights that accompanied the birthday letter with my disinheritance.
Exhaustion took over me and I fell asleep in her arms.