"Lets get married one day!" The small, cheerful girl giggled. She held the hand of her star crossed crush as they walked through the park. He smiled nervously at her touch.
"O-okay! Sure..!" The young boy, no older than ten, managed to stutter out as she boldly confessed her devotion to him.
Fifteen minutes prior, the boy had simply asked her to date, which meant sitting with him at lunch. She gleefully accepted, and even followed him around after they ate.
"Lets be together forever! Until the end of time. Until we die." She exclaimed once more, her tone innocent and happy.
The boy nervously looked at her, "S-sure!" He pushed out once more. The two passed a large slide, moving to sit underneath it alone.
Though, even now sitting in the hard rock ground, she never let go of his palm. The boy looked down at the connection, and swallowed nervously.
"I would do anything for you." She smiled at him, her dark hair held up in two pigtails. The boy was oddly regretting his words now, the rather incoherent statements the girl kept babbling out greatly confused the young boy—who had no true idea what love is.
"Would you do anything for me?" She suddenly asked, her face going bleak, devoid of any emotion. The young boy sweat dropped at her sudden hospitality.
He felt he had no other choice but to answer with, "Y-yes."
His answer suddenly made the dull shadow surrounding her glow luminously. She beamed at him.
"Would you..." She suddenly pondered, her next demands of love intimidate and terrifies the young boy to the brink of tears, "... Gouge out your eyes for me?"
The memory was close to that of a blur, but the consequences of my twisted beliefs of love affected me deeply throughout the rest of my adolescence. It happened in fourth grade, I was ten, a young and bubbly girl. I was thrilled to have finally gotten the chance to experience love.
However, my endless devotion, and seemingly uncommon way of displaying it was considered weird by my peers. It's not like I wished to date them anyways—they didn't want me either—as my views of love still remain the same. Was it my Mother who set such a view? Impossible. I've never seen her with a man, much less anyone other than the group she's in. Something for church, i was never one to pay attention to it.
Theo dropped me off at my dorm once we were done touring the main parts of Astra. He said It was time for him to head off to lunch, but he also briefly mentioned that we'd be seeing one another furthermore.
The words were so vivid, yet grey. Was It the way he conveyed It? Or was It the colorings of darkness that blanketed his face while doing so? I shake my head away at the mere thought of his exhausted voice---his exhausted everything. Theo was a boy to remember, I'm still deciding If his loitering remembrance Is In a promising, or bad way.
So with that, I'm rather knowledgeable with everything at Astra, or at least with the things I should be. Where my classes are, the cafeteria, and lastly my dorm room. The school itself was built In eighteen-seventy-five, giving the reputation a long one. Even from the start of this school, It only flourished with the best of the best. Surely because they only accept the best of the best.
It still baffles me that I fit into that criteria.
Theo couldn't help me unpack my things, or else he would have---as he told---because the lunch routines in Astra work odd. Half the students get their food and then shortly after, the other half follows. I suppose It's built to avoid any chaos within as the number of students Astra holds Is exceedingly high, though I doubt It prevails.
I stand In front of my dorm room, anxiously tapping my foot on the floor. Not because I'm waiting for anyone to answer the door for me, but because they're waiting for me. The number plastered on the entrance 145 sector 2F, only made my stomach more queasy.
God, I'm nervous.
I don't want to imagine how I've probably made my poor roommate already impatient with meeting me. Sighing to myself In dismay, I can't help but hope that Isn't the case. Everyone here already has daggers out for me.
Everyone but Theo.
And as much as I try to push off that irregular boy, he enters my mind just as fast as when I forgot. Theo Partridge was an engineering major, as he told me. By the way he speaks and carries himself, I know Its obvious that he deserves his spot in Astra.
I just find is particularly weird that he would trouble himself for a girl like me. Going out of his way to tour me on his own time, not to mention how he spoke to me.
How he looked at me.
I shake It all away, knowing If I dwell on him any longer, I'll miss the chance to even meet my roommate. I can only imagine how awkward It'd be to start showing up after classes without any introductions.
I raise my hand slowly, balling It into a fist to pound It on the door. I know I have some serious anxiety issues, I always have, even in my adolescent years, so Its no surprise to hear my heart beats faster than It should. Thump. I feel It like Its coming out of my chest, a part of me Is scared someone can actually hear it.
Knock. I do It once. Knock. And a second time.
I shakily sigh, readying myself to knock for a third time, but before I can even get the chance, the door swings open to reveal a dazed girl.
Her hair is blonde---no---snow white. This girl has hair whiter than any person over the age of ninety, though her complexion itself was beautiful. She looked young, maybe nineteen? Twenty?
"Hi!" She beams, her once dazed face shifts into something excited, "Rose, I take it? Mr. Wellsy already told me we were going to be roommates. I haven't had one all year so I was taken aback when I get one mid semester. Hey---I am not complaining though!.. Oh, wow, you're so pretty... I'm so glad! I was totally worried they'd send someone gross."
My internal thoughts blur out her voice. I can only take a couple mental notes about this girl so far.
The first being, she talks a lot. This girl surely has a rambling problem.
Second being, her hair was white. Very, very white. Something I still mentally trip over to take in. Im sure Its not impossible to have, but surely rare. Making her special.
To say that youre in Astra Is already a big deal. That alone makes you special, so this girl here Isnt far from one of a kind.
"Anyways, I'm Rin! Short for Irina."
I smile awkwardly, "I'm---"
"Rosie Lue Jane. I know. Mr. Wellsy already told me."
I don't know If I should be grateful for her outgoing personality, or scared.
Either way all I manage to give her Is an awkward smile, she moves to the side to let me inside and at the invitation, I slowly envelope myself inside the dorm.
Half of the room was covered In what I assume Is Rin's things, whilst the other was completely bleak with the mere exception on of a bed frame and mattress, my luagge sitting on top of it.
Rin collapse on her bed across the room, she sighs before letting her head rest on the softness of the bed, "Your major?"
"Huh?"
She props herself up on her shoulders to look at me properly, "What's your goal? Why did you decide to attend Astra?"
So many questions.
I chew on my bottom lip before I turn to my belongings, "I didn't choose to be here." I say for the second time again, "It was kind of an only option."
"Astra isn't some kind of prison? Wait—wait, are you saying you don't want to be here?" She laughs, almost like my situation Is a joke. "Its not everyday that you hear a student of this shithole say they don't want to be here. Trust me, if they could, they'd probably wear a big, red sign on their back saying, STUDENT OF ASTRA, BOW BEFORE ME, LICK MY SHOES!"
A giggle slips past my lips as I start roaming through my belongings, searching for a coat as chills began to rack through my body, "I can tell. Everyone here seems so absorbed in themselves. Its..."
"Unbelievable." Rin cuts me off, "You'd think the idiots that attend here would have some knowledge surrounding respect, but nope. They're too good for that I guess."
I pause and pull my hands away from the suitcase, a small jacket In hand. I don't put It on yet though, I move to sit on the edge of the bed, laying the piece of clothing on my lap. Sighing to myself In ease, I can't help but bask In the feeling of finally being able to sit. I've been doing nothing but running around all day so It feels nice.
Rin's words made me close my eyes as the silent moments passed
"Not all of them are that way. Some are pretty cool."
Her face contours into amusement, Rin's eyebrows raise, both of them.
"Interested in a special somebody already? Ouu, tell me! I need to know."
My eyes drift In shame, "I don't like him---romantically---I'm pretty sure he likes me though."
My words only caused for Rin to squeal in position, kicking her feet as she help her face.
"Oh, stop that..." I sweat drop, "I'm sure I'm just being foolish. Maybe he's just... Naturally charming." It didn't seem that way though, I knew that deep in my mind. He seemed stoic, monotonous, my words were nothing short of an excuse to halt her excitement.
Rin calms down, a soft sigh leaving her lips, "What's his name? Maybe I know him. I actually know quite a few students around campus."
"Theo---"
She shoots up from her pack, an expression of dread and shock plastered across her face before she practically screams, "Theo Partridge?!"
My eyes narrow, and my expression shifts, "Yeah..?"
Rin shoots up from her bed to rush over to me, welcoming herself in my own space, "Are you sure he was being nice? Or was it forced?"
I glance at her nervously, her reaction wasn't pleasing, "It was more than nice. He was being... Almost poetic with his words." I lower my head with a sigh, "He spoke to me in a soft manner, he even wanted to tour me further after lunch---"
"Good god," Her words were chilling, "Theo is... What's the right word..." She pauses, placing her index finger on her chin, "He's evil, I swear! Possesed by some crude demon! That loser told me once I have the voice of a crow, brain too, apparently---off topic!"
She cuts her own words short before turning to me, "Theo is an odd one, i must say. He acts nonchalant, be in reality he cares too much. I admit, he's better than most of the pretentious assholes here, he has talent, but doesn't spend all his time talking himself up."
I cant help but pay close attention to every word she spouts--mostly because they're about Theo. My denial has pushed me over the edge, now I've fallen deeper into my curiosity about the boy.
"I see..."
"That's all you're going to say? You see!" Rin wraps her arm around my shoulder, pulling me in close. I sweat dropped nervously as she carried on. "I'm no therapist, but a small token of advice, steer clear of that freak--"
Knock. Knock.
A small yelp leaves Rin's lips as she jumps in her position. I wave her off with a nervous smile, "Ill get it. Don't worry."
Yet another knock echoes through the small room as I stand to make my way over to the door. I wonder if it's for Rin, surely so. If it weren't—
"Oh. Theo?" The moment I pull open the door, I'm met with a smiling Theo. His eyes are closed, hiding the beautiful complex shades of grey. His white blouse, that was messily tucked into a pair of black dress pants. "Whats up..?"
He opens with eyes with a hum, his expression narrowed. "Im certain I thoroughly discussed our schedule." He stuffs his hands in his pockets, his gaze taking in my own confused one. "... Ill dumb it down for you... Ready to continue the tour?"
I squint at his remark.
"See! See?" Rin grabs my shoulders from the behind, peaking over to glare at Theo. "The Devil in disguise."
He perks up with a smile at Rins appearance. "Oh. It's you."
"Dont be so blunt, Rin..." I laugh nervously, shifting in my step.
"Oh it's okay, Rose. Don't stress yourself to please someone like that."
"That!?" Rin flinched at his offense title, she steps in front of me with a mean glare, pushing me back with her hand a little. "Youve got another thing coming if you think I'll let you take of with my Rosie."
His expression dropped.
The once happy, and soft-toned words seemed to dissolve in thin air. Eyes that fell into something hooded, his complexion into something bleak. What an odd boy... He had charm, only when he wished.
A man with charm is very dangerous.
"Your Rosie?" He takes a step closer to her, leaning down with an cocky, offended smile, "Dont humor me, Doll."
"What does that even mean?" Rin is practically gritting her teeth at this point. "Are you implying that she's yours?"
I unexpectedly move to where I'm back in between them, pushing the two away from each other. Rin is behind me, and Theo in front. He's much taller than me—so he merely stands there, gazing down at me as my forearm is pressed firmly to his chest. I give him a subtle glare, "To be fair, it's not like I'm property or something. Stop arguing over childish things."
Rin sighs behind me, her body language relaxing. "Sorry." She murmurs under her breath.
"You're right." Theo cuts in, never breaking eye contact. "You're far from an object. Please, Excuse my arrogance."
I pull my arm away from his chest and sigh softly, turning to Rin with a soft look. "Ill be back soon. I'm sure there's not much left to the tour, we've been over most of the school so far."
She glares at Theo while patting my shoulder. "Good luck, Soldier. Wish you the best."
I roll my eyes at her with a playful look before grabbing the door handle and closing it behind me. My back is pressed against the surface, hands behind still holding the knob. Theo is still looking at me, ands he is relatively close.
"I have something to confess, Darling."
"Stop it with the pet names. You can call me Rose, yknow..."
He leans down with a smile, though this one looks genuine.
"Darling is cute though? I think it fits you too."
I turn my gaze away from his with a scoff, "Do you like me or something? We literally just met..."
His face is filled with confusion for a moment before he takes a step back, "Oh. Right. Apologies, once again."
He doesn't answer the question, rather goes silent after his empty.
I pull away from the door and began walking down the hall to the exit. Theo doesn't hesitate to follow me closely. "Anyways, go on. You said you have something to confess..?"
"Thats right."
"Well..? Spit it out."
"So snappy. I must've gotten on your nerves..." He sighs, lowering his head behind me with a pouty expression. "I lied."
I stop in my tracks. "About?"
"The tour."
I turn around fully to look at him with an annoyed look. "What."
"Theres nothing more left of the tour." He smiles playfully. His eyes leaking with mischief. "Sorry, Darling."
He's looking for a reaction. That's all it is. And so I simply turn the other way, and begin walking back to my dorm room. He stands where he is, looking at me with a confused look.
And then it hits him.
"H-hey!" He calls out, I ignore him. "Stop being like that! I just wanted to hangout!"
I raise my hand and flip him off from the behind.
Asshole.
I'm nearing my dorm room door, and as much as I didn't want to listen to Rin's babbling while I unpacked, I had no other choice. She was a sweet girl, I just simply have a hard time replying to so many useless topics.
Before I can open it though, Theo's clasp to my wrist made me halt in my steps. His hand squeezes around my own, I sigh heavily. This boy really doesn't give up, huh?
Though...
A part of me, deep within, is somewhat enjoying the attention.
It's so foreign... And it almost feels wrong to accept. Though... His persistence was entertaining me.
"Please?" He asks out from the behind. His tone is desperate. "I have somewhere to take you–somewhere nobody else has been besides me. Oh, shit." He shakes his head, his own desperation causing him to trip over his words, "Ignore that last part. It's just a nice view of the school, that's all. I-if you want, bring Rin. I just really, really want to get to know you."
...
Desperate boys are kind of cute.
I turn only have my face to look at him.
"Is lunch included?" I say, my face still painted with a small glare.
His own is a little shocked at first, all before he breaks into a soft smile.
"Of course..."
Theo's hold on my hand is delicate, his skin is warm against my own. With hazy cheeks, I follow him up a staircase, stopping silently at every floor to make sure no one was there.
"Theo... Where are you taking me?" I suddenly whisper out.
He pulls me onto the final floor, and begins leading me down a hallway. "Ive already told you enough about it, why ruin the secret any more than I have?"
I roll my eyes playfully at him as he leads me down the hall, the walls littered with oil paintings, the floor checkered, but grim. The roof was arched, we passed a door every once in awhile. This must've been the floor where the teachers stay.
My eyes can't help but wonder, suddenly landing on the connection of our hands. How he held me so softly, so delicately.
He was warm. So soft. So tingly.
They narrow. But I squeeze his hand softly. "Theo?" I call out.
He hums softly.
"Why must you trouble yourself for a girl like me?"
He suddenly stops in his tracks, turning to face me with a confused expression. "Hm? Is it not normal to hangout with friends?"
I nearly laugh at his words, taking a step closer, our hands still glued together. "No. It's normal." My eyes narrow. "Just not for you, right?"
He fully turns to face me, "Rose... You're really letting that big mouthed roommate of yours influence you? Focus on me. How I treat, and speak to you. Not others. Only me."
He's looking at me so intently, and his words aren't crude, they're blunt. Was I really treating him differently after the sudden information? Even I wasn't sure. I can't help but grow nervous under his intimidating stare, "Its not that..." I softly tell. "I just don't get it, truly. If you're into me... Then just tell me so I can—"
"I'm into you."
My cheeks heat up excessively.
"Does that please you?" He mumbled.
I look up at him, unable to think, or say anything.
"What will it take for you to just focus on me? Tell me." One hand moves to clasp my cheek, my breath hitches as he leans in close.
"I-i just met you, Theo—"
"Then get to know me... As I want to know you." His eyes go hooded, and he softly smiles, running his coarse thumb on my skin. "I want to know your good parts, but more than anything I wish to learn your bad ones. I want to understand you're everything, head to toe, and I want to worship it."
My heart is beating so fast. And my mind is fighting hard to tell my body that I've just met this boy, and that his funny-sounding confessions mean nothing. That it all seems too good to be true...
But my heart can only pay attention to his honey-coated words.
"You do..?" I whisper out, leaning into his touch. A smile draws to his lips, and he nods silently.
Theo leans down, his mouth to my ear, and whispers, "Let me worish you, Rose—"
The soft clicks of a door opening, alongside absent minded chatter made me gasp. Theo moved the hand that held my cheek to cover my mouth, he piques up with a soft hum, all before he shoots me a mischievous smile. He presses and index finger to his lips and shushes me, before he turned opposite from the noise and began running down the hall.
Hand in hand with me.
My stomach was swirling with an unknown excitement. A part of me wanted to stab it, rip it out, but the tingles that rippled through my body from it made me dizzy with infatuation.
Theo turns a left, leading to more stairs, but the area was secluded. "I hate stairs." I whine out as we began climbing up them once more.
"You'll live, Darling."
"Shut up."
"Only if you're the one making me."
I glare at him from the behind, but I cant find it in me to pull my grasp away from his own. "You're so gross."
He laughs at me, almost in a mocking way.
"You know you love it."
"I don't even know you."
He turns, just his head, to give me a small glance. "You will eventually."
Before I can spit out another silly objection to his obscure flirting, it seems like we've finally reached a large wooden door. This must be where he was planning to come from the get-go.
Theo opened the door, and pulled me inside quickly. The moment I stepped foot in, I couldnt help but look around as the sounds of him shutting the door behind echoed throughout.
The room itself was small, and the walls angled into something close of a circle. The walls were littered with bookshelves, to which books were messily placed and thrown around among them. In the middle, however, was a seat, kind of built into the window. The seat looked big enough to even some-what lay on.
My gaze traveled along the room, my body shifting, when i suddenly catch a glimpse of an oil panting. It looks like a girl laying out in a field--
But before I could take in anything more, Theo threw what seemed to be a blazer on top of it. My gaze shoots over to him, then back to my surroundings.
"This is really cool," I admit, smiling softly, "And you're the only one who comes here? But how--"
"Mr. Wellsly is easy to convince," Theo cuts me off, moving over to sit, his hands rest behind him as he leans back to look at the school courtyard. "All it took was a couple pornos."
"Ew." My disgusted laughs bubbles through the air as i make my way to sit next to Theo. I, too, much like him gaze outside the window, it was past middle day, and it looked quite pretty out. "You seem like the sly type. Id expect nothing less from you."
He rolls his eyes lightly before elbowing me, "Oh? But you don't know me. I think you're just denying yourself at this point."
"Denying myself? Pfft. Of what."
"You're so empty headed, Rose." He raises a finger to flick my forehead. "Me, obviously."
I can only glare at him.
What an asshole.
A disgustingly charming one though.
"And you're so full of yourself. I've done just fine without you until now."
Theo smiles, and its not in a playful way. He leans in close, closer than he should be. "Are you sure about that?"
I almost flinch at his words. My expression drops. "God. What strings are you pulling at?" I remark back, my tone offended. "Listen. You're flirting, it was cute at first, but just... Stop before you seriously start making this complicated. If you think you know what I want in a relationship, then you're absolutely mistaken. You wouldn't be able to... Handle someone like me. Drop it."
I sigh, my gaze drifting from his own. "I mean, what's wrong with just being friends---"
My soft-spoken words were cut short by the sudden touches of Theo's hands. His touch was like fire, my cheeks heating into a soft pink color from both my shame and his gaze.
Without warning, he leans in close, I can feel his breath against my lips. He whispers, his next soft spoken whisperings make my eyes widen, "If you wished for the stars, id do my very best to deliver them... Though I know I wouldn't be able to," He pushes his face even closer, "Would you accept a limb instead? A tooth? My innocence? Anything to please you."
He's got me.
My attention.
My curiosity.
My need.
My desires.
And so I kiss him.
And I know its wrong, I know I shouldn't be doing this, but he said exactly what nobody else could've. He said exactly what nobody else could even think of.
The kiss is needy, and even sloppy. Theo pulls me over, and I find myself climbing on top of his lap, wrapping my arms to clasp the backs of his neck, his own roaming my body. The kiss never broke, and it felt close to that of a guilty pleasure.
I moved my hands to hold both his cheeks, pulling away from the kiss to look down at him, my eyes hooded and lips parted. Our complexions were so close, and as I held his face in place, I couldn't help but squeeze my thighs.
"Would you... Gouge out an eye for me?"
Theo smiles at me, squeezes my hips a little, "Yes, Darling." He presses his lips close to mine, but doesn't kiss me. "I only need one to admire you."