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Chapter 45 - Chapter 45: Confessions

Revenge. Revenge. Revenge!

Come to think about it. Why did he separate me from my mother?

"Dear, let's have a seat," her expression showed she sensed something was not right. The maids soon joined us, taking their places across from us.

The three maids couldn't even look anywhere else but their plates and that's when it hit me. They were gossiping about me, I overheard them and they saw me.

A heavy silence settled in. It was anything but comfortable. I despised silence whenever I was with others. With everything that was going on inside my head, I lost my appetite.

"I'm full. Thank you everyone, " I glanced at Carmen who seemed surprised by my sudden change of mood.

"Are you sure? I can ask the girls to bring something to you in your room, " She offered.

"No, I'm fine. I'm full. The medicines are messing with my appetite," I managed a small smile and headed upstairs to my room

Shutting the door behind me, my heart seemed to stop once more. The events of today replayed in my mind.

From Alejandro to Marcus, to the mistress. So much to process all at once. Alejandro had shown too much determination to be joking. My heart, and my mind, were tangled in confusion and guilt.

Just recently, I had let another man kiss me. I wished I could blame it on the wound, but that wasn't the whole truth. I felt the kiss, it melted my heart, and I did not want it to stop. I craved for more.

With that on my mind, Pablo's memories came without knocking. What did they mean to me these days? What if I was to see him?

What if I were to make a different choice about whom to marry? Whom would I choose, and for what reason?

Marcus hadn't just disrupted my life; he had added more complexity to it. If I hadn't met him, I wouldn't have to contend with these men. I could have been happy with Pablo. I would have known what I truly wanted.

But everything had been arranged. With what I'd learned today, I was convinced he knew what would happen, and he planned accordingly. Maybe he even had someone keeping an eye on me, someone who knew everything about me and my family, including my relationship with Pablo.

The pressing question haunted me repeatedly: Could my mother be the mistress? As far as I'd recalled, my mother had never been so close to anyone that would suggest otherwise. How had this come to pass?

A knock at the door, and it swung open. Camila entered. "You surprised everyone when you suddenly lost your appetite."

I bit my lip, uncertain of what to say.

"Are you all right?" She sat beside me and rested her warm hand on my shoulder.

"I don't know, Carmen. I just can't shake off what you told me, everything about Marcus, you know."

"I understand. And I know for a fact that you and Marcus' marriage was never built on love, but maybe... " She paused

"Maybe what? " I arched an eyebrow.

"Maybe you could be the one to introduce some love into his heart. He's filled with anger and resentment, and he keeps hurting others. But deep down, I believe he's the one who's hurting the most."

"Carmen," My voice sent a silent warning.

"Camila," She sighed in concern.

"You are asking me to love a man who poured a hot porridge on me. The same guy who wouldn't even allow me to see my mother, " My eyes burnt at the thought. He was the cruelest.

"I know it's tough, Camilla..."

"No," I shook my head as I sobbed, "No, Carmen. I don't even know why he forced me to marry him. Now I'm more than confused, thinking I could be part of his revenge. Carmen, I'm scared and angry as hell!" I cried.

My heart ached. He had taken my life away from me, and given me something I never wanted. To him, I was just trash.

"You haven't seen him this time, Carmen. He doesn't even want to see me. Even when I try to do something good, it's always wrong for him. This morning, he just called me and mom snakes."

"Oh My God," She gasped, "I'm so sorry you had to go through that. What had gotten into him? This was what I was trying to save you from. Look at you now. You're too young to be living like this!"

"I don't know when all of this will end," I shook my head, "Because I know the only thing that can make me happy again is to get out of this house and start living my own life again."

A small tear escaped her eye. She pulled me into a tight hug as if she knew exactly what I needed. I was broken.

"I don't know why God allowed this. But I hope you will find the answers and a permanent solution to this. But please, think about it," she pulled away from the hug and wiped away my tears.

"You need to rest a little, my dear. Call me if you need anything." She caressed my arms once more before getting up and heading towards the door.

I closed my eyes as she closed the door. Everything felt like a dream. Maybe if I kept my eyes shut, I would wake up to a new reality.

That wasn't the case. Every time I woke up, this was the reality, and it became crueler and more complicated with each passing day.

I looked at the wound on my thigh, a symbol of what my life had become. Ugly and helpless. The scar it would form would forever be a reminder of that fact.

I rose from the bed and went to the table with three bottles of alcohol I didn't recognize. I chose one and poured it into a glass. It was bitter, but it gave me a strange sense of relief. I felt like I could take on anyone, even Marcus.

I moved closer to the window, admiring the breathtaking view of the garden. It was the only good thing that the devil had managed to create without causing harm. It was the one place where I found peace.

Coming down the stairs, I went to the kitchen and fetched a handful of strawberries from the refrigerator, then headed to the garden. A small smile crossed my lips as the scent of the flowers filled my nose. It was beautiful. The flowers were beautiful.

But my eyes were drawn to a species of flower I had never seen before. Their dark velvet color and delicate petals captivated me.

"Beautiful, aren't they?" I raised an eyebrow at the husky voice. I hadn't seen him all day, and I missed the butterflies he stirred in me.

"Indeed, they are," I tilted my head. "Aren't you off work today? Who works on their day off?"

"Now you even know my days off?" He looked surprised, a smirk playing on his lips.

"I didn't see you all day today, so I assumed," I said, trying to defend myself.

"Sure thing," he nodded, doubt still in his eyes, and a victorious smirk on his face. "That's a pretty convincing assumption. And you're standing beside the most beautiful flowers adored by every beautiful woman."

"Really?" I caressed the flowers' petals gently. "Who else loves these flowers?"

He moved closer to the flowers, his hand reaching out to touch the petals. His unexpected frown and the sadness that washed over him raised my curiosity. I'd never seen this side of him before.

"My first love,"