A translucent glass, a mirror of nothingness without the dark beyond it.
Only a vague reflection blurred the imperfection of yourself, unlike the mirror.
Though that perfect image from the present time trapped behind glass.
-
Different than what I am looking at right now, a window glass at night.
Hazy and unclear reflection of yourself like the corner of your memory.
Staring at it blankly, watching the foregoing smoke of your contemplation.
-
Starting one month ago before my departure.
"Tenten will be the star of the play," my daughter announced with a big grin on her face. It was a monumental moment in her life at the time.
"Congratulations, you made it!"
That was the first milestone toward her dream and her desire to make me proud. I cheered at her―repeated the congratulation around five times―with an overreaction as I lifted her into the sky.
"Waaaa-aahhh! Put Tenten down!"
She's flailing her arms like a bird―still begging for mercy―in the sky of the clear afternoon. And then, I lost my balance.
Here I am, lying down on the floor and cushioning my daughter's landing. Simultaneously, we laughed at my stupidity.
"Like mother like daughter."
Cheery day for a cheery household. We both got back up to embrace the glint of sunlight from the window.
"Did Mama think Tenten can do it?"
"Of course, you can!" Not thinking that much, I gave her a comforting push in her confidence. Now that my brain was thinking, I asked her back,
"Say, why did you apply for the role?"
This went back a year earlier when she finally joined a theater community near the church after another two years of desiring to join.
"When Tenten first joined, Tenten always loves principles for motivation. Never give up! Face every obstacle! Kept moving forward as Mama said before."
"I did?"
"Yeah, Mama did! When we first met."
I didn't remember if I really said that at that time even though I remembered clearly the image of the main event and our promises.
"That's why Tenten's principle is to fulfill every promise Tenten had." Tenten pointed at the sky with her index finger and one hand on the waist.
"Tenten will beat Mama other than in the field of cooking." Her index pointed at me.
With a smile, she declared, "Tenten will make Mama prouder than before."
That's the spirit I wanted when I will fulfill my promise.
"With that spirit, you can do everything."
"Ehe~"
Our eyes locked on like magnets. Our smiles share hope. Our promise will keep us together.
I will miss this.
"Mama sorry for having to leave you."
"It's fine," she assured. "Tenten will soon be more grown-up than before. Every food can Tenten cook on her own, every danger can Tenten beat up just like Mama taught."
I can't say what I wanted to say since she hates belittlement. But to me, she was always my little angel.
"I'm sorry I wouldn't be there during your rehearsal."
"Yeah, yeah. Mama better says sorry for saying sorry too much. Besides, Mama has given me enough courage."
It's hard for me to say goodbye―hoping for a month can be fast forward. But like mother like daughter, Tenten knew to assure others with a promise.
"Mama promise Tenten to return when the performance will come. And in return, Tenten promise Mama,"
"Tenten will become the Angel of Sin just like Mama."
Thus, she spread her arms like a little angel.
Here's where I stood, in the origin of all redemption, the birth of new cycles of consequence, the symbol of change in Ruluna, the Oripeccatum Park. For many, it was the beginning. For me and others, it should be the end where I was in peace. That's exactly what I got and I conflicted with what I missed.
A [Envy] for the prize to be in the beginning.
A [Greed] to face my karma, so I can find my peace.
A [Sloth] to achieve change within me.
A [Lust] for redemption.
A [Gluttony] for the grandeur of my career.
A [Wrath] for the past.
A [Pride] as the creator of this beginning.
One can't say that I have no regret. But one thing that remains the same that brings me to peace or the end that I felt grateful to have you as my daughter, to be by your side in this afterlife. Because only at the side of the end, I found you.
"Welcome to my Kingdom!"
Bang!
The introduction started with a bang coming from my little angel's handgun aimed at me―not the kind of firework or pyrotechnic I was expecting. Thankfully, I already closed my eyes and visualize my upcoming show. For tonight, at the right time and in the right settings.
"It was decided," I announced. "Today show to celebrate the new year of The Angel of Sin."
I opened my arms to embrace the mild crowd that surrounded me. That's why it's our job here as a performer. Are you agree with me, Tenten?
"You can't be a performer like me if you were asleep like your crowd. We are here to wake them up. Remember?"
Tenten gave me no response. Her bare feet were standing still with a shooting stance that I taught her four years ago.
"It's no use, I'm bulletproof when I closed my eyes."
I reminded her of the divine that she faced in her way.
In addition to these closed eyes, I can also see the body temperature of the people surrounding me, especially my daughter in front of me. I saw a similar warmth that used to distract me from the cold of the night and the blood.
"Each day, you resembled my old self."
She wasn't the only one reminded. Not by being told, but her presence in here alone was the explanation. Her face focused towards me, but she looks like a lost child―not once she seemed aware of my presence. Her behavior was weird, but not unfamiliar.
"A soul blinded by a desire either for satisfaction or whatever you desired, Tenten."
And here you are acting to be the Angel of Sin, exterminating the evil from this land.
That's why you hid all of this behind my back, right? It's embarrassing, isn't it? When the person you acted was looking at you… I'm also embarrassed with my inability to… my inability to admit it has corrupted you.
Of course, I get that feeling. We're equal after all, but not the same. It's common sense you were sleeping on.
"That's why I'm here to wake you up."
I just need to get close to her and gave her a good smack.
I can detect her exact position as her entire body's temperature was so red, it stood out among these…crowds?
"beat…"
The corpse still have a body temperature?
"Beat Mama!"
Grab!
Suddenly, the crowds emerged from the death.
"Be-at Ma-ma!"
I kicked one of them in the head. At a glance, I looked upon the head I just kicked and I saw its right eye radiating a blue color. This 'corpse' wasn't the only one that had them.
"Be-at Ma-ma!"
They, these crowds of death, are chanting her order like a broken recorder. They were stuttering with a sadness that drained their soul―with a face as pitiful as a zombie, but also crying. They all sounded static and didn't have―
"Be-at Ma-ma!"
Gah! These insects crowded me like a fanatic. Before I realized it, in front of me was full of crowd. The temporary solution to avoid crowd crush was to move and find some area to breathe. The permanent solution just needed them to look at―
"Be-at Ma-ma!"
The tip of a knife was launched directly to the front of my left eye before I dodged it at the last second. A big portion of my left cheek was sliced, and I managed to paralyze one of them with my divine eye. But the crowds―
"Be-at Ma-ma!"
Give me a break! I had to punch, kick, and push left and right before I knew that I lost my daughter among these crowds of her fanatics.
"Be-"
"Shut up!"
They gave me no breather here.
I can barely open my eyes without any injuries. I didn't even get to comment on the fact that she knew exactly who she was fighting. Why she became a maniac and the reason for her to fight against her mother was blurred to me.
Like seven years ago.
"―"
Maybe, it was like seven years ago.
"―"
The sound of the soulless crowd has been blocked by my ears―because I just ignored them. Now, all I need to do was to crawl my way up. Literally. As I step on one of their backs, onto one of their shoulders, and used them as a stair to free myself.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Some of them shot me while I just kept running while constantly closing and opening my eyes. Run and run across this vast park until I found my hiding spot in one of the trees.
Gasp! Gasp! Gasp!
I'm really not cut out for direct combat. Thankfully, this place was so big for hundred people to track me down.
In the meantime, I regenerated my wounds―a gunshot in a shoulder and an already-clotted slice in my cheeks. While at that, I thought about what should I do next.
I checked what I had first. Behind my jacket, there was my "fancy equipment": a Glock 18―loaded with its magazine―in the concealment pockets, a knife, and a lighter with a certain mark on it.
Despite the lack of my equipment, it's actually just another walk in the park. I could just find a good spot and paralyze them with my divine power. However, my priority wasn't there. My priority was on my little angel, Tenten.
Knowing for sure what state she was in; all I need to do is to awaken her. But that's only the beginning to open the gate toward my priority. To be specific about my priority…
How can I enliven this anniversary for my daughter?
I can't call myself the Angel of Sin if I celebrated my anniversary without chaos.
To satisfy one fate, one needs to play on the line between life and death.
Those are the meaning of entertainment wherewith thou struggled their way up.
In my kingdom as the crowds about to blow this place. In this chaotic party with…
…the adrenaline in my soul…
Let the purpose of music proceed to unite their attentions; to cleanse them once and for all, especially her.
Peek-a-boo.
A whisper from the back can be heard as I turned my head quickly. Nothing in there, except the voice in my head.
i found you.
The blue moon sees everything from the sky.
The countdown for me to think was over, but it was enough time for me to breathe. Thanks to that, it blew the fire within me. Bigger and hotter than ever.
As I observed my surroundings, I saw a bunch of her zombies climbing up the tree. Some already went barbaric with their handgun. Good.
Come at me! Chase me! Follow me my sheep! Look at me, now!
I jumped from one tree to another. Toward my main objective. Restrict myself to reduce the number of attendances unless it's necessary. Rush toward my mission. Rush. Rush and Rush. Took her out.
Kȋ̵̧̛͇̗͒̃̍ll̷̥̰͚͙͘͠
"Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaa!"
I let out a tear, understanding the torment of these zombies.
It blurred my sight and it turned into a vision. Each breath I took was tantamount to my heartbeat, pumped with zeal, and driven by pleasure.
Is it just me or everything was moving so fast?
Can you understand what I feel, Tenten?
I kept moving like Tarzan, treated the branch like a straw, and that was how thin the strings were that controlled my physique. Until there will be no more trees in front of me, only a greenfield.
Accelerate. I jumped with any momentums left in me.
The red moon sees everything.
A crowd beneath me, insects that were hooked by the spark of my gun's muzzle. One stood out among them was her, my dance partner in the place for a ball.
"What did you see?"
I chatted with the voice that sent a shiver in my head. As I advised her earlier, when someone talked with you, you make an eye-contact with her.
The two moons stared at each other. Paralel to heaven and earth.
That's the last thing I saw clearly.
"i found you, Mama."
I reached the point of no return. I was blinded by this vision of mine. I was ecstatic. I was a terrible mother. I was everything you want to be when you shouldn't. I―
"i will beat Mama"
I――■■■
"―will blow that statue!"
Landed on my feet, ■ passed through the little angel.
Because the zombies saw the red moon from the eye, their movement was halted for a moment. ―Thumpthumpthump― They grasped their head in pain. Heavy signals interact with their brain, blood vessels, and the surrounding nerves. ―Thumpthump Bumpbump― the sound of drums fiddling their head, ―bumbumboom― like a Sangkakala, and ―crunch― into a new orchestra.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
―――
Symphony that reached deaf ears. Rock n' Rolla's lyrics which was the reason they called it a 'death' song. A lyric that becomes the majority or even the whole song was trashed by another artist like Jackson Pollock's abstract art.
"An art served its purpose if it caused an uproar," some fools coped when they never heard the uproar themselves and called it a success just from seeing a meaningless text on paper.
Show the nuclear heat. Hear it. Let it all out, as…
…every thought out of control…
―――
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
It's time to head into the main event.
"Be-at Mama!"
Before ■ cursed them again, left them behind ■ again. And after a static melody―like the sound of a fountain―came from their necks as the source of that melody splattered all over ■. After ■ navigated ■ way through this distorted night to avoid a collision. After and after ■ ignored a gun wound as it didn't hit ■, leaving the body with pain and the red paint as the badge of honor. After, the high pressure inside the soul congested the veins. After all of that, it just never stops. It's just… Kept. Moving. Forward.
"Be-at MamaaaaAaaAgh!"
■ am jogging. Running to reach the target. A requiem of anguish from the crowds that accompanied ■. It's the only thing clear in the head.
■ closed the eyes as the target was straight in front of ■. ■ still see everything. Zombies carried the 'fireworks' with a gradual and limping taptaptap on the ground, ■ shot them. Bang! The firework is all secured.
One-third of a minute to prepare the music performance. Put the explosion in the right place, and showcased the tools. Waiting for the right time.
A footstep can be heard making her way into the main stage.
Tap!
With these closed eyes, ■ heard the cue near ■. A light tap yet also loud when it stomped the ground suddenly to brake the pursuit. A fitting beat from her little feet. Here she is, standing in front of ■ as ■ can see her small body's temperature rising compare to before. It's tiring, eh? ■ could only imagine the face of awe and terror in her as ■ saw seven years ago. The driven pride inside of ■ was fueled by it as the audience of her fans behind her still screamed. At last, this heartbeat gave stable and rapid beat cues for the music performance.
That's the last thing ■ heard clearly.
■■■■■■■