THE JESUS SLAY QUEENS
Episode 29
The door opened and mummy Abayomi walked in. She looked at me and smiled.
I was expecting her to show some sign of surprised to see me in my school uniform and still in the house. But she gave me a reassuring smile.
"Your daddy has dumped you for me, right?" She asked.
I looked at her and shut my eyes. She was still smiling at me.
"Come with me!" She said and walked out.
I managed to drag myself to my feet and stood up. Soon, I was walking behind her and we arrived at her personal library. We also called it her prayer room. That was where she usually locked up herself and spent hours with God.
This was the second time I was entering this place. The first time I was here, it was to bring something to her. When I entered, I sensed the presence in the room. It was hot and cold at the same time.
I entered and looked around. I am in a barrack, this was a place for training soldiers.
"So! You were crying to daddy to come and get you out of here, right?"
I bowed my head and remained silent. I was unable to answer her.
"Daddy oooo! Mummy oooo!" She said mimicking a childish voice and started laughing.
I looked at her and wondered what was funny that made her to start laughing. Honestly, I felt she was mocking me. Not until she did something that really got me curious.
Soon, she brought a mirror and told me to look at it.
"Who do you see?" She asked.
I looked at it and was more confused. Why was she asking me to look at the mirror? On a normal day when I look at the mirror, why am I supposed to see?
"Mummy! I don't understand!"
"That's not the answer to my question. Who do you see?
I looked again expecting the picture to change from my face to the face of Mufasa, but it didn't. Wasn't that what she was about to recreate? Simba looking into the water and finding himself looking at the face of his father.
"Mummy! Why are you telling me to look at the mirror?
"Who do you see?"
"Me!"
"Who are you?"
I looked at her confused.
"Don't take your eyes off the mirror. Keep looking at it while you tell me who you are," she replied.
I had to look at the mirror and examine my face. It is as filled with sweat and tears. I saw how ugly I was looking at the moment. I quickly wiped my face with my palms.
I looked again and saw my eyes were red from crying. But I decided to do something with my look. I decided to look heroic and tough.
So I looked into the mirror with a bold face and added a slight frown. I looked angry and at the same time determined. This was so dramatic. I was not looking myself anymore. What I kept seeing right now was something I dreaded to say.
"What do you see?" Mummy asked again.
"A warrior! A fighter! A deadly slay queen!" I answered.
"Now that's exactly what God have been looking for. That's the answer I've been expecting you to give."
"But mummy why? The bible says that all power in heaven and on earth has been given to us. I mean we christians bow have all the powers. Greater is he that is in me than he that in the world.
So why is it looking as if Satan is more powerful than me? Why is it that some of the agents of darkness I have met are more powerful than me? What's the reason behind this irony?
You told me the day you saw that demon coming to rape me in the dream. You said that you expected me to attack him, but you also said you were shocked there was no power in me to chase him a away. You said I was completely empty of power.
But the bible says, I am full of power by the spirit of the Lord. Also, Jesus said in the book of Acts 1:8. But ye shall receive power, after that the Holy Ghost is come upon you: and ye shall be witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth.
I have been baptized in the Holy Ghost. I have experienced this second birth. Why is it that I am still powerless? Is that this scripture doesn't work for everyone? Is it that I don't have faith? Is it that I am afraid of what the devil and his agents can do to me that makes this power not to manifest in life?
What's the reason? Why am I empty? Or is it because God feels I am not ready to carry something as important as spiritual power?"
She smiled and patted my shoulder.
"Do you have a bank account?" She asked.
"Yes I do. That's where my dad sends me my upkeep money," I answered, wondering how this question related to the the answer I was expecting.
"If I send you money to your bank account, Have you been given money?" She asked.
"Of course! I'll see the alert on my phone".
"Good! But does that money appear on your palms automatically?"
"No!"
"Why?"
"Because I have not withdrawn the money from my bank".
"Oh! Really?" She asked.
"Yes!"
"So, you mean I can be here dying of hunger but my Dad had sent me a hundred thousand naira. But the money is in my account, but I'm too busy to go to the bank or POS dealer to withdraw it, right?"
Now I understood the message clearly. Now I see where she was heading with all the questions.
"So you mean you can be here starving, yet you have all the money in the world, right?"
"Yes ma!"
"So my daddy sent me money? Why can't he just withdraw the money and bring it to me cash? Right?"
"No ma!"
"Come on! I mean, after God has finished sending the money to our bank accounts. He should still come back to come and stand in the queue in front of the ATM machine and do the withdrawing for us, right?"
"No ma! I'm sorry mummy! I now see where I got it wrong," I replied.
"But can't we give it a try? Why not tell God to come and withdraw the money he sent us to us. I mean, after he has sent the money to us, he should still come back and help us to do the withdrawing of the money he sent to us.
Can't he do that for us? I mean he's so loving. All we have to do is to sleep on our beds from 9pm to 7am. He'll bring the breakfast to meet us in the bed. No need to go and cook. All we need to do is to keep rolling on the bed. Everything we need will meet us there on the bed.
Isn't that what we have turned God to? An errand boy, right? He sends you money, he'll still be the one to withdraw it for you abi?"
"No ma!"
"Juliet! Not everything in Christianity is for free! There's what is for the public there's also something the next group of people who would press on for more that is in God.
If you're satisfied with your current spiritual level of give us this day our daily bread and butter, no problem! Allow those who want to win territories for God advance into the barracks"
I went down on my knees and began to cry.
"Mummy please teach me! Teach me all I need to know. I can't continue crying and running all the time. I ant to be a warrior! I want to learn how to fight. I want to terrify darkness. I can't continue like this! Please help me!" I cried, bracing myself on my hands.
She looked at me and smiled.
"There are two things you must know when it comes to combating the powers of darkness. As a soldier, your most powerful weapons are prayers and the word of God.
You need to understand that a prayerless Christian is a powerless Christian. Forget it! No matter the level of your determination to serve God, if you don't pray, you'll become a prey.
There are also two weapons the enemy uses which you must know. They are fear and ignorance. That's the weapon they used on you today and got you running like a chicken.
Fear is a powerful weapon in the hands of the devil. He uses it to win his opponents before the war even starts. A man living in constant fear, is already a defeated man. You must know that fear is not a feeling. Fear is not a way we feel.
The bible says, for God has not given us a spirit of fear. Am I correct?"
"Yes ma," I answered.
"That made me to first understand that fear is a spirit, not a feeling!"
My eyes were widened in shock. This is beyond me. So fear is a spirit?
"Secondly, if God did not give us the spirit of fear, then my question is who gave us the spirit of fear?"
I shook my head in remorse.
"Juliet! Who gave you the spirit of fear?"
I bowed my head.
"Answer me!"
"Ma I don't know! I don't know where I got it from. Maybe it's part of what I inherited from my parents by carrying their blood."
"That's not the answer Juliet. Did you do words and opposite in school?"
"Yes ma!"
"Good, the opposite of light is what?"
"Darkness," I answered.
"The opposite of good is what?"
"Evil."
"So the opposite of God is who?"
"Satan," I answered.
"Good! Very good!" She said and nod her head.
"So if God has not given us a spirit of fear, then who gave it to us?"
"The Devil!"
"Beautiful. So you collected something from the devil, right?"
"No ma!" I said in my defense.
"You opened your hands and collected the spirit of fear from Lucifer, right?"
"No ma! I didn't collect anything from the devil."
"What are you doing with the Devil's property? Did your father give that spirit to you?"
"No!"
"So what are you doing with something your father never gave to you?"
"I'm sorry ma! Now I realize that I was carrying something that wasn't mine at all."
"Realizing is not enough. Fear is not only a spirit but the works of the flesh. One thing you need to understand about the works of the flesh is that it is very adaptive. So knowing that fear is a spirit is not enough.
How can you beat that spirit and send him back to his master?"
"Please teach me ma! I'm ready to learn. I'm seriously a coward. I cannot withstand anything. I'm just so fearful and cower at the slightest frightening incident.
Please teach me!"
She looked at me and with her eyes gestured towards the bible on her study table. I stood up immediately and quickly rushed to get it.
"Open to Revelation 21:8."
I flipped through the pages and read out immediately I arrived at the passage.
"But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death."
"Juliet, can I ask you a question?"
"Yes ma!"
"All those people in that list, did that scripture just say they would end up in the lake of fire?"
"Yes ma."
"Who are the first people on that list?"
"The fearful," I answered.
"Let me say this in plain words. A fearful man or christian will never make heaven."
My heart skipped. What did she say?
"Have you read in the bible, do not sin? Have you?"
"Yes ma!"
"Then have you read in the bible do not fear?"
"Yes ma!"
"Are there any similarities?"
"Yes there is."
"Do not! That means God doesn't want us to do it. Am I correct?"
"So of he says don't do this, that makes it a sin if you do it, am I right?"
"Yes!"
"So when God says, do not fear, that means if I fear, I'm disobeying him, right?"
"Yes ma!"
"And all disobedience is sin, right?"
"Of course!" I answered.
"That's exactly what the bible had to say about fear."
"But mummy!"
"Yes!"
"Fear is a natural thing. I mean, it's completely normal for one to be scared. Why would God send us to hell for allowing fear in our hearts?"
"Now listen to me! There are some particular sins that are completely natural because, they are imbedded in the flesh we carry. For example, the urge to copulate with the opposite gender. Infact, if you're a human being and you never feel attracted by the opposite gender, we'll need to send you to the doctor or to the deliverance minister.
It's completely natural to see a beautiful lady and your hormones begin to respond. Or a handsome man and everything in you wants him to hold you in his arms. That's the same way with fear.
But just as we have to deal with our sexuality and stay pure. We must deal with our fears and stay fearless.
The question is, are you ready to learn the secrets of how to defeat the spirit of fear?
To be continued....
The day I discovered that fear was enough to send me to hell. I was shocked beyond words.
Are you ready to live a fearless life?
Come with your pen and jotters tomorrow.
Can't he do that for us? I mean he's so loving. All we have to do is to sleep on our beds from 9pm to 7am. He'll bring the breakfast to meet us in the bed. No need to go and cook. All we need to do is to keep rolling on the bed. Everything we need will meet us there on the bed.
Isn't that what we have turned God to? An errand boy, right? He sends you money, he'll still be the one to withdraw it for you abi?
Don't expect God to do everything for you. Ride up and discipline yourself. Your body is your responsibility.