Alisha pov
I'm lying down on my bed and staring at the ceiling blankly. It was midnight, but I couldn't sleep at all. I'm still shocked by what happened today. And what the heck happened in my life? Today's event keeps replaying in my mind like a broken record. And no matter how much I tried; it didn't stop.
I keep remembering the moments in that classroom. The classroom was big but felt so small with him. His blue eyes were staring at mine with so many emotions. Anger, lust, affection, mystery.
Too many emotions that it made me dizzy and breathless. His eyes were like a maze that if I entered, I would never be able to escape.
A sigh escaped my lips. What have I gotten myself into? My hunch was giving me warnings, but I ignored it all like my alarm clock. When he said, I belonged to him, I knew that he meant it. But it made me feel like an object. I'm not a thing that can be owned.
And when I said this to him, he said something in French. The French words that came out of his lips sounded hot, but at that time I didn't understand a thing. Right after coming home, I searched for the meaning of those words, and the meaning left me breathless, and my heart shaken.
He said I'm not a thing but LA MAÎTRESSE DE MON CŒUR. THE MISTRESS OF HIS HEART.
Those mere words of his made me feel precious. Made me feel powerful. He said those words so easily. Did he really mean it, or did he just say that at a heat of the moment, or does he really like me?
No, get yourself together, Alisha. What like? It is just a little attraction that will fade away soon. I can't get swayed by these little sweet words, or in the end, I will be the one who will get hurt. I have learned my lesson once. That was enough.
He is like a blue fire— beautiful but dangerous. And I got burned from just getting a little close to it. If I let it engulf me, I will turn into ashes. Again, a sigh left my lips. I shouldn't have gone to the bar. Now, I'm regretting going there that night.
I should have listened to my parents and stayed the hell out of any bar in the world. And even if I had gone there, I should have stayed out of his sight. I should have. I could have. Now, it's late.
But, he is weird. I thought he wanted to destroy me for kissing him, but instead, he wanted me to take responsibility. Isn't it normally girls who ask men to take responsibility? Why is it reversed? As a girl, I'm not asking him to take responsibility for taking my first kiss.
What am I going to do now? I have a feeling that he will come to me again. I forgot about him, but now my mind is filled with nothing but him and the words he uttered. The way his eyes were staring at me and the way he caged me against the wall.
Just by thinking about it made my heart act weirdly again. Ughhh... Stop thinking about him. I think I should distract myself from thinking about him. But how should I do that?
I grabbed my phone to use some music as a distraction but found tons of missed calls and messages. Missed calls and some messages are from Jenny, and the rest of the messages are from Jake.
OMG, JAKE... He totally slipped out of my mind. When I came out of the classroom, everyone's attention was on me. Everyone was whispering, and that made me nauseous. Jake was waiting for me with Jenny, but I didn't pay him any attention and just hurried home with Jenny.
On the way back, Jenny tried to ask me what happened, but I was too out of the world to answer any of her questions. She must be so worried about me. I sighed yet again. I looked at the clock to see it was one a.m. She must be sleeping right now. I will talk to her tomorrow, and as for Jake, I need to talk to him too.
Alexander's words came into my mind again. He said he didn't want any man near me. When he said that, his eyes were filled with possessiveness. I like his possessiveness toward me. Wait, I like what? I have gone crazy. He is crazy, and I'm going crazy too. He is dangerous for me. I need to stay away from him. What belongs to him? I only belong to myself. Sleep... Sleep, Alisha.
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Sun rays come into my room through the window, and the wind swings the curtains. I'm lying on my stomach and staring at the blue sky. I attempted to sleep many times last night but didn't succeed in doing that.
The alarm clock tit-tit sound filled my room. I turned it off and sat up. Do I really have to go to university? I don't want to go. With a sigh, I dragged myself into the washroom and got ready. I went downstairs and had my breakfast.
I left the house and went inside Jenny's car. Before I could even buckle my seat belt, she bombarded me with her questions. I told her I would tell her on the way. She started driving, and I started telling her all the things that had happened.
By the time I finished telling her, we had arrived at our university. She listened to me through the whole ride without saying anything. We stepped out of the car and headed inside the university. She finally decided to open her mouth and said,
"I knew it. I could tell by the way he was looking at you the whole time. Why don't you give him a chance? Without giving him a chance, you wouldn't know if he is serious or not. And I don't think he will let you go."
"I don't know. I don't want to be heartbroken again, Jenny. And he seems dangerous," I said.
A part of me says to give him a chance, and another part says to stay away from him. The wall I build around me, he is already shaking it so easily without even trying. And I'm not liking it. I headed to our locker and finally noticed people gazing at us, or should I say at me.
Their gazes are making me uncomfortable. I know why they are looking at me. Rumors of yesterday's incident must have spread like wildfire. Some want to confront me, but Jenny's glares keep them away from me. I took my book and proceeded toward my class.
On the way, some girls are shooting me glares, some look at me with envy, and some are just excited about finding a new gossip topic. They just saw me with Alexander one time, and they are reacting like that. If I dated him, then I couldn't even imagine what might happen.
Another reason to stay away from him. My world is peaceful, but with him around, it's becoming chaotic. Yeah, we are both from rich families, but our world is still far apart.
"Not everyone is the same, Alisha. Maybe he is the one for you," she said, trying to convince me, but I don't think I'm ready to let someone into my world. Ready to love and trust someone again.
We entered the classroom and took our seats. The classroom was empty. Well, this is the first time we have come early. Soon, the students started coming, and they looked at me before taking their seats.
The professor entered and started his lecture. I tried my best to concentrate on the class, but the looks everyone was giving me were distracting me.
It was lunchtime when Jake came to me and asked me if I was okay. I assured him that I was fine. We're seated at a table with our lunch. Jake seemed to want to ask something but hesitated.
"Is everything okay?" I asked.
"Yeah, if you don't mind, can I ask you something?" he said, and I gestured to him to go on.
"Is something going on between Mr. Moretti and you?" he asked.
"No," I said, and he released a breath of relief.
"Then can you give me the answer?" he said hopefully. Here it comes. I stopped eating and looked at him seriously.
"Jake, I'm sorry. You are a great guy, but I only thought of you as my friend. I'm sorry," I said, and his face dropped.
I'm really bad at rejecting. Was I rude? I looked at Jenny for help, but she was just eating. Traitor.
"It's okay, I understand. I hope we can at least be friends." He tried to put a smile on his face.
"Sure and I'm really sorry," I said sincerely.
"It's really fine. Umm, I'm done eating. I will leave first, then," he said, but before leaving, the way he looked at me made me feel uneasy. What was that?
"The poor guy. You broke his heart, Alisha. You're so cruel." she said, sympathizing, and I glared at her.
"You weren't helping. The only thing you were doing was eating. What if he does something?" I said, and she laughed.
"Don't worry, he will be fine," she said. I sighed and started eating.
The classes have ended, and I'm heading home. Jenny dropped me at the house and told me to think about giving Alexander a chance. I went straight into my room and flopped on the bed. All the attention I got today made me exhausted.
There is nothing to think. I already know what to do. I will stay away from Alexander. I will never date Alexander. I will never fall in love with him. NEVER.