It hits me like a tonne of bricks as the seeds of remorse from what I did just a minute ago begin to fade. Was his admission sincere? Was all of it real? When he wakes up, will he regret them? Do I even need to stay? I'm concerned by how long I remained here as I see the time is 1:40 AM on the clock on his nightstand. I decided to go for his sake. Knowing that he is sleeping, I walk slowly away from the bed so as not to wake him. I carefully dress myself and turn to gaze at Ethan, who is sleeping with all of his anxieties gone. I truly want could remain in bed with him, but I have to choose whether I want the answers or not. My feet decide to leave his chamber by doing so. I take my backpack, my coat, and my phone off the charger. I'm appreciative that I can recall that the lift has a lobby button.
I'm relieved to learn that an Uber is nearby when I get to the lobby since it's just 2 minutes away. As soon as I start driving home, thoughts of Ethan start to wander.
When I do get to my flat, I immediately go to my room and take a fast shower to rid myself of the guilt I'm feeling. I finish removing my makeup after my shower and then change into a loose shirt and pyjama pants. Despite my restless thinking from what I did hours earlier, I let sleep take over as I climb into bed and realise it's three in the morning.
I choose to get up the next morning or early in the afternoon to eat something to ease my little headache. If I recall properly, I didn't have a lot of alcohol last night. Since it will soon be twelve, I prepare myself a breakfast sandwich as I enter the kitchen. It doesn't matter what time of day it is; I need coffee to operate. I experience a little relief from my headache as I sit at the counter and hear Trina's room door open.
Somebody had a sleepless night. She remarks in jest. Trina is dressed for the day, and I offer her a flimsy grin. She is dressed in a loose-fitting blouse and cropped pants. She has free-flowing hair and little makeup on.
"That sort of thing." She moves closer to where I'm sitting.
She continues, nibbling at my meal, "Well give me the details because I noticed you didn't come home until 2." Which is OK with me.
Though I consider telling her all that occurred to me last night, I deliberately decide to do so. Trina is after all my closest friend, and she will express to me her honest feelings over the circumstance just as I would for her.
"Okay, but it's a long one," I reply. I tell her everything that occurred last night after taking a few breaths. When I informed her that I had slept with Ethan, I anticipated that she would be startled and astonished. I'm out of breath when I'm done telling her everything, so I grab my cup.
So now what do I do? I'm anxious to bring up his confession to him. What do I say if he does? I eventually inquire after taking a drink of my steaming coffee.
"Wow, you had quite an interesting night," she comments before going on. Well, first off, if I were you, I'd wait till he clarifies himself before bringing it up.
"Why would I choose to do that instead?" I ask.
He would care enough to clarify if he meant what he admitted to you last night. Additionally, whether or not you were inebriated, you were correct to leave his house because if it were me, I would expect him to tell me to stay straight away. I'm reassured, Trina says.
"Okay. However, I detest having to wait until Monday to see him. You are aware of how much I detest conflict, particularly during a hectic week. I grumble.
Trina adds, "Well, I bet you he's probably trying to reach you to talk," as if that were a possibility.
"What do I do if he does? God, I still can't believe I slept with him. Putting my head in my hands, I speak.
Yes, I do as well, but if he calls, don't pick up, in my opinion; he should explain in person. She offers. Perhaps she's correct. I ought to simply let him speak for himself without any interruptions. I only hope that the weekend will give me the fortitude I need to hear him out and get the answers to my list of questions.
"You're right, I should do that," I say towards the end.
Well, I am typical. As she says this while flicking her hair to one side, I laugh at the ludicrous action.
Can I at least hear how the sex was after all this serious talk? She grins and asks.
I grin. I remark, getting up from the counter stool and carrying my empty dishes to the sink, "Yeah right."
Oh, please! Just pour because you know I'll hound you until you give in. Trina mutters, pouting. Trina is the one who constantly points out the obvious. I suppose that's how well she knows me.
"Okay! Fine! I search my memory for the appropriate words to express how it was.
"It was?" Trina, who is perched on the edge of her seat, asks.
"I'm at a loss for words to express it. I attempt to explain to her, "I think it was indescribable but in a nice manner.
"So, overall, it was good?" She seems bewildered as she asks.
I reply, now that I'm washing my dishes, "It was better than good; it felt like there was a lot more passion between us than just lust."
"Wow! Who would have imagined that you would be sleeping with your employer, a millionaire? I'm sorry, but I simply can't. Hey, how about we go shopping in Union since you have the weekend off? You know I need to look great for a conference trip I have coming up with my business, therefore I'm yearning for new outfits." says Trina.
"Okay! Let's go in an hour then, shall we? I may need to grab a few items anyhow. I still feel shattered. I point to my looks as I speak.
She winks and says, "Well, you're a hot mess, but sure, let's do that. Besides, I still need to eat." She states.
I respond, "Okay," and go on to my room to get dressed. I choose to dress in a pair of jeans and a T-shirt. I chose to put on my most comfy slip-on shoes since I knew Trina would want to spend most of the day shopping. Trina was accurate when she said that Ethan was attempting to contact me, so I go towards my phone on the nightstand. I see that I have several text messages and nine missed calls. I decided to switch off and clean my phone. I am aware that if I leave my phone on, I will be tempted to call him. I switch it off, put my phone on my nightstand, and leave my room to meet Trina outside.
"Ready?" Trina inquires as she slips on her trainers.
I take my jacket and handbag off the coat rack and reply, "As always."
While shopping in Union Square is enjoyable, I find that it involves a lot of walking, which wears me out. I propose that we stop at a café in the plaza for a breather, especially today after visiting five shops and trying things on. Trina orders a hot chocolate and croissant, and I do the same. To refuel for the next round of shopping, we subsequently decide to take a seat in the café.
I slurp my hot chocolate and remark, "I can't believe you're not tired after going through 5 stores."
"I'm shocked that you aren't. I also need to select a dress for the conference and another for the after-conference event. She claims.
Do you need two dresses? I inquire while I chew on my pastry.
Yes, the organisers are preparing one for the dinner and one for the meeting. She clarifies.
I reply, hoping for her, "Oh okay, I'm sure we'll find your dresses."
She replies, "I hope so." We rapidly eat our food while still conversing, and once we have had enough relaxation, we walk on to the next set of shops next to Post Street.
When we get to Saks on Post St., we immediately begin looking for the dresses. As she puts on a dozen outfits I A long silk dress with a front slit is what I discover. I want to purchase it right now, but the price makes me think twice about it. When I return to the changing room, Trina has already made a choice. She ultimately purchases a fitted long-sleeve velvet green dress for the dinner occasion and a black bishop-sleeve shirt with a pleated skirt for the conference. Trina is being checked out by the salesperson, so we go to Geary Street to another department store. I quickly find myself purchasing two new work dresses, a few tops and some trousers. I make my purchases, and then we go on to our last two shops. Trina made a special effort to get a few new clothes, whilst I purchased some new bras and undergarments. The sun is sinking as we arrive at the last shop, so we choose to return to the flat.
The sun has already fallen when we return to the flat, and I begin to feel more hungry than normal.
"Hey, want to order some food?" I turn to face Trina, who is in the living room, and I ask.
"Sure! I was just about to ask the same question. I'll leave my cash on the desk while I store my belongings. Taking her shopping bags, she says. I grab my phone to switch it back on as I make my way to my room. Indeed, I continue to get missed calls and texts from Ethan. Sighing, I start the process of deleting my alerts. Once that is finished, I place my order for pizza by calling. I start putting my goods in my wardrobe as soon as the order is placed. Ethan is so persistent despite my complete disregard for him, I can't believe it. Despite Trina's attempts to divert my attention, I was aware that this was going to be a long weekend. I'm going to need to find a better method to ignore him if this keeps happening.