3.1
Hey, man, don't just stare off into space like that. You want an abble?"
As soon as Subaru's consciousness had returned to him, there was a ripe red
fruit in front of his face.
It looked just like an apple, and as he stared at it, the phrase "fruit of
knowledge" crossed the back of his mind.
It was that forbidden fruit that, when eaten, resulted in expulsion from
paradise.
If Subaru ate that fruit now, would it save him from the inexplicable situation
he found himself in?
"Hey, kiddo," said a middle-aged man as he furrowed his brow and called out
to Subaru, who was being completely unresponsive.
Subaru slowly drifted from the vague edge of his consciousness back toward
reality, and when he was back, he suddenly raised his head. He looked this way
and that, his heart beating ferociously and his breathing ragged.
He was in front of the fruit store on the main street, just past noon. There
were various colorful vegetables and fruits laid out, and the person standing in
front of those goods was a stern-looking man, the shop owner with the white
scar across his face.
This was the crowded street that Subaru had already seen several times
before. He scratched his head.
"I just don't get it…" he muttered, and then overcome with dizziness and
nausea, he collapsed on the spot.
3.2
As he felt a cold rush of water on his face, Subaru was somehow able to bring
his muddied consciousness back to reality.
"…"
Subaru looked at the empty water jug the fruit shop owner had brought
Subaru. After Subaru had collapsed in front of his shop, the owner had helped
him get himself together.
Subaru was glad that the owner had the heart to worry about him, but the
fact that he was so kind as not to ask where Satella had gone struck a deep
wound in his heart.
As Subaru sat on the earthen floor, he wiped away the water from his bangs
and clenched his teeth. The glint of that blade still haunted the back of his
mind, along with that terrible smile as it danced through the stench of blood.
"Hhgh…"
The back of Subaru's throat twitched and as he sat hugging his knees, he
couldn't keep his entire body from shaking.
He'd lived a completely normal life up until this point. He had never
experienced so much fear, so much despair.
He didn't want to think anymore. He didn't want to remember anymore. He
wanted to draw back inside his shell and forget everything.
The glimmer of the blade, the arm flying off, the scream, sinking in a sea of
blood, that silver hair…
"…"
The less Subaru wanted to think about it, the more clearly his memories came
back to him. Overcome by anguish, Subaru raised his face up to scream, but just
as he was about to let everything out…
"Huh…?"
The voice that had risen up inside Subaru dribbled out full of doubt, and he
just stared, dumbfounded.
In Subaru's range of vision, with his eyes open wide, he could see a tall figure
with skin like a reptile…a beast-like humanoid that was only as tall as his waist…
a young dancer with pink hair…a swordsman with six swords at his waist…
…and a young girl in a white robe with silver hair that swayed as she walked.
Those violet eyes of hers took one glance at Subaru as she walked by, but she
looked away as though uninterested and walked on.
Those amethyst eyes, full of determination, just looked straight forward as
she stared down the road.
In that gallant stance, that delicate beauty, in that girl that Subaru had been
searching for, there was no change.
Unable to call out immediately, with rasping breath Subaru struggled to his
feet and chased after her. "Wai—! W-wait! Wait up! Please, wait…"
For an instant, the girl reacted to his voice and looked back at Subaru with a
cold gaze, as if she was looking at a stranger.
Subaru felt his heart gouged by the chill in her sharp gaze. He had not done
what she had asked of him. He had hurt her. He hadn't apologized yet. There
was no way that he could be forgiven, but even so Subaru chased after her.
He didn't know how she felt. At the very least he had to know what she was
thinking.
If he was going to let what he imagined her to be thinking hurt him, he would
rather be hurt by the real her, here in this reality where he could feel pain.
"Wait, please! Satella!"
He wasn't sure of what he wanted to say to her if he could catch her, but
when the answer to that question became clear in his mind, Subaru called out
Satella's name as if he had just remembered it.
Finally it seemed as if his voice had reached her, because just as she was
starting to get away from him the girl stopped immediately in her tracks.
Subaru weaved through the crowd to catch up to her, and put his hand on her
thin shoulder.
"Don't…ignore me. It's my fault that I went away and it's my fault for not
listening to you, but I've been desperate. After what happened I went to the
loot cellar, but I wasn't able to meet you there and…"
As Subaru grabbed her shoulder, Satella looked at him in surprise.
As she turned around and Subaru opened his mouth, what came out was a
sort of self-defense that sounded full of excuses.
What made him realize that was Satella's clear eyes.
Her stare was emotionless, and as Subaru faced it, he still felt a sense of ease.
As far as he could tell, Satella didn't appear to be wounded. Subaru experienced
this as salvation.
"I'm sorry for going on about myself… I'm so glad to see you're okay."
The fact that they were able to meet again made Subaru feel simple
happiness.
There were so many things they had to talk about, but before all of that
Subaru felt as if nothing he had done was in vain. He was finally and profoundly
relieved…
"…What do you think you're doing?"
But as Subaru found this sense of ease, Satella was incredibly angry. Her white
cheeks had reddened, as she twisted her body to get Subaru's hand off her
shoulder. After taking a step back and putting some space between her and
Subaru, Satella's eyes were filled with hostility.
After this unexpectedly stern reaction, Subaru unconsciously gulped.
Still, this reaction made sense. From Satella's perspective, she should be
shocked that Subaru would even show his face in front of her. There was no
insult too great for her to lob at Subaru and—
"I don't know who you are, but what the hell are you thinking, calling
someone the same name as that Witch of Jealousy?!"
After hearing that reaction, which was beyond anything that he could have
imagined, everything that Subaru had built up to brace himself was smashed to
pieces.
Faced with those unexpected words, Subaru felt as if time had stopped.
The sound of the crowd disappeared. All that Subaru could hear was the
violent beating of his heart, and the rough breathing of the silver-haired girl in
front of him, tense and defensive. He felt as if all of the other sounds had
disappeared…but that was no illusion.
"…What?"
As Subaru looked around he realized that everyone, everyone all around this
crowded shopping district, all the pedestrians on the road were staring at them.
Everyone looked shaken, and no one would move a single muscle, stock-still
and quiet.
It was as if the conversation between Satella and Subaru had taken control of
the entire area.
With her severe stare, Satella was waiting for Subaru's answer. However,
unsure of what he was guilty of, Subaru couldn't think of how to answer. The
reason why Subaru thought Satella would be upset and the real reason she was
upset were different.
"I'll ask you one more time. Why are you calling me by the Witch of Jealousy's
name?"
"What do you mean? That's what I was told to call you…"
"…I don't know who told you that, but whoever it was, that's in incredibly
poor taste. Even if you're not the one who thought of it, it's bad enough that
you agreed. This is the Witch of Jealousy we're talking about, the embodiment
of all things taboo. Most people would hesitate to even utter such a name, and
you're using it to name me?"
With her anger displayed for all to see, Satella…the silver-haired girl threw
Subaru into a storm of confusion. Everyone else around seemed to be nodding,
agreeing with her, and that, more than anything else, proved that she was right.
Subaru had absolutely no idea what was going on. He couldn't understand what
she was saying. Subaru had only just called her by her name.
But Satella had rebuked him, and everyone around agreed that she was in the
right.
"If that's all you wanted to say, then I'll be on my way. I don't have time to
deal with you."
Illustration 8
The girl looked on as Subaru simply stood where he was, hanging his head.
She then turned and walked off, with her hair dancing behind her, having
nothing more to do with him.
Subaru thought to call after her, and started to shout her name, but it got
caught in his throat as if it had frozen shut.
If Subaru called her name again, he would simply be making the same mistake
twice. But then, what should he call her?
He hesitated, unable to decide what to do.
"!"
Subaru gasped. On the canvas top of a cart on the side of the street, from a
position just a head taller than Subaru, something leaped. A small body was
pulled by gravity toward the ground, and as soon as it landed it took off on the
wind. That little gust of wind, with dirty clothes and blond hair trailing behind it,
wove through the crowd with a godlike dexterity, and from it an outstretched
arm slipped into a certain girl's hawk-embroidered white robe.
The two only touched for an instant, but to that little gust of wind, that
moment was enough.
As the wind made the robe fly up and the girl with the robe twisted around,
the wind took off flying again.
"It can't be!"
The silver-haired girl raised her voice in shock and stuck her hand into her
robe. She couldn't find what she was looking for, and with eyes opened wide,
she looked in the direction of the quickly fleeing wind.
Seeing the dragon-adorned badge in that wind's hand as it passed quickly by,
Subaru yelled, "Felt?!"
With Subaru's call, the wind waved for a moment in hesitation, but without
slowing down it quickly flew down a narrow alley. Everything happened so
incredibly fast that Subaru could only see for an instant what happened, but
that had to be—
"I've been had! Is that why you stopped me? Are you two working
together?!" moaned the girl as she looked at Subaru standing still.
The girl quickly turned her palm toward Subaru, but apparently changing her
mind, she ran off in the direction the wind had gone down the alley.
"Hey, wait! This is a misunderstanding! I…"
Subaru took off after them down the alley, hoping to sort things out. As he
ran, his mind was filled with questions and doubts. There was too much
information to process, and his panicked mind couldn't deal with it. Even
without that, he had just gone through death twice, and everything in his mind
was muddled.
"There's got to be someone out there who'll be nice to me! Why the hell was
I even summoned here?!" Subaru yelled, having had enough with nothing
making sense, as he kept running with unsure footing down the dark alley.
Subaru wasn't sure of his stamina, but at a short distance, he didn't think he
would lose to those two girls. However…
"Damn! A wall?!" Subaru spat. Right in front of him was a dead end.
Neither of the two girls was there. Felt probably could easily climb over a wall
like that, and he thought that Satella would have been able to do something
about it with her magic.
I could try to climb over to the other side, but I don't think I'd be able to catch
up to them.
Subaru couldn't afford to waste time here. He had no idea how to get around
the capital, so if he lost them here, it would be impossible for him to catch up to
them.
"Then should I head to the loot cellar? If Satella and Felt are alive, then Rom
must be…"
Even as Subaru said this, he felt that several things were wrong and
contradicting themselves. Felt had been cut down. Rom's neck was slit. Satella
fell in a pool of blood. Subaru had his abdomen cut open—twice. How was it
that everyone was alive…?
"No. Now's not the time. I can't waste time thinking. Right now I've got to…"
Subaru would go on ahead and quickly meet up with Rom. That was what
Subaru had to do. He could think later. The best thing for him to do right now
was to leave this alley and head to the slums.
Subaru turned around.
"…You've got to be kidding me!"
Right in front of him, blocking the entrance to the alley, were three shadows,
three people, with dirty clothes and a rough and barbaric appearance. Three
thugs who used these alleys as their hunting grounds. It was Subaru's third time
encountering them that day.
3.3
"Give it a rest already! Just what is it going to take for you punks to learn?!"
Tired of seeing those three thugs again, Subaru furiously stomped on the
ground.
This was the third time they had met. Every time was in a back alley, three
against one. Given how their first and second efforts were fruitless, Subaru was
stunned that they were so determined to catch him that they'd try a third time.
"I don't have the time or the patience to deal with you fools. Out of my way,
now!"
The current situation had really put Subaru out of sorts, but there was also
the fact that, given what happened last time, he thought he should be able to
scare them if he shouted. At least that's what he thought.
"'Get out of my way,' he says. Ha! I don't like your attitude. You don't get it,
do you? You're not in a position to be ordering us around."
"It was three-on-one last time and you guys still lost like you were nothing!
You think you can talk big like that? Even sore losers would show more shame
when they wail!"
However, the thugs didn't seem to fear Subaru at all, and kept up their
taunting. Subaru bit his lip at their unexpected reactions. Even small-time
villains like this had a sense of pride, he thought.
He wanted to avoid wasting any more time and risk losing Felt and Satella.
Also, given the risk that a fight would entail, Subaru decided that he should deal
with this peacefully.
"Fine. Have it your way. I'll give you everything I've got. That's what you want
from me, right?"
Subaru held back his irritation and raised both of his hands in the air, showing
that he was giving up.
The thugs all looked at one another after Subaru changed his attitude, and
then all burst into laughter.
"What's that?! If you were that scared, you should have just said so!"
"Ha! Look at this guy! Don't talk all big if you're just gonna bend over!"
"Whatever. If he's going to do as we say, that just makes it easier on us, right?
But what a coward, huh?"
Subaru was irritated, but he just laughed it off. He decided to name the group
of thugs "dumb, dumber, and dumbest" to make himself feel better, and
muttered under his breath, so they wouldn't hear. "Once I meet back up with
Satella, I'm going to borrow Puck and make them…pay?"
Just as Subaru was about to lay out all that he owned in front of him, he froze.
"Huh…?"
Out of everything that had happened since Subaru had arrived in this new
world, this was the most unsettling.
"Why…?"
At Subaru's fingertips, inside his plastic convenience store bag, was a bag of
crispy snacks. Corn-soup flavored, they were one of his favorites, and he had
grabbed them on a whim at the store to eat in place of his dinner.
When Subaru was with Rom at the loot cellar, he had shown them off to him
as a great late-night snack, an act that he had later regretted.
However, that bag was still there, as full and sealed as when he had bought it
at the store.
"I shouldn't have these anymore… Rom ate them all, and I complained and…
there weren't any left. I'm sure of it."
Why were the snacks back in the bag? There was no trace that it had been
opened. It wasn't possible.
Subaru felt his thoughts blocked on all sides. However, in that locked state,
Subaru still came to a conclusion about what was happening. Even though he
had come to a conclusion, it wasn't doing him any good. As soon as it occurred
to him, he rejected it as impossible. His sense of reason denied the possibility.
"Hey, what are you doing?!"
"…What?" Subaru suddenly heard a voice right next to him. Cut from his train
of thought, that was the only way he could react.
It was one of the thugs. The smallest one. The one Subaru had just named
"Dumbest." While Subaru was lost in thought, Dumbest had walked over and
put his hand on Subaru's shoulder.
Subaru twisted and pushed his hand away. "Out of my way…"
"What'd you say?!"
"In every sense of the word, I've run out of time to deal with you guys. I've
got to…check something."
"Are you kidding me?" As Subaru pushed Dumbest aside and moved to exit
the alley, the other two stood angrily in his way.
"Get out of my way! I've got somewhere to be!" He had to rule out this
unbelievably stupid, unthinkable theory…
Faced with Subaru's yell, the men hesitated a bit. If he could break through
and get out onto the main street, he would probably be out of harm's way.
After deciding that, Subaru stepped down to kick firmly off the ground.
However…
"…Wha?"
Just as Subaru put his foot down it twisted. The strength drained from his
legs, and he fell to his knees. He put out his hands to catch his fall, and cursed
his idiocy for stumbling at such a critical moment.
"Huh… That's strange…" Just as Subaru tried to push against the ground so he
could stand back up again, his arms started shaking. He didn't think he could
stand back up again. He didn't think he could even lift his body.
"Well, I've done it now, haven't I…?"
Subaru looked back as he heard that voice tinged with anxiety, and then he
realized what had happened. A knife was sticking out of his back.
"Gah… Ah…" As soon as Subaru was conscious of it, an unbearable pain swept
through him. He choked. It was a natural reaction to the searing agony.
…I've been stabbed! I've been stabbed! I've been stabbed! I've been stabbed!
I've been stabbed! I've been stabbed! I've been stabbed!
Dumber, the one with the knife, had struck first. Subaru didn't notice as he
drew his weapon, and just as Subaru was trying to push past him, he was
stabbed in the back.
This pain was the same kind of torture that he had experienced in the past
few hours, but no matter how many times he experienced it, he didn't think it
was possible to ever get used to it.
"What? You really stabbed him?!"
"I didn't have no choice! What do you think would have happened if he had
escaped out into the street? Just think of what we'd have to deal with if he did."
"Wait! Don't do that, you idiot! ….Ugh. Yeah, this is bad. His guts are
damaged. He's gonna die."
The giant, Dumb, turned Subaru's body over, and as he did, the knife was
pushed deeper into his back.
"Ughh…." Still greater suffering was piled on top of Subaru's existing pain and
even Subaru's death throes were kept from leaving his throat.
Subaru couldn't call for help or scream out in anger. There was nothing left
for him to do. He just repeated his irregular breaths, feeling as though he was
going to drown in his own blood as it filled his throat.
The feeling in Subaru's hands and feet started to leave him, and his
consciousness was flickering weakly like a light about to go out.
Again, his vision went dark. This was the end, just like last time.
What do you mean, "last time"…? Subaru thought to himself. The fact that he
was now clinging to an idea that he had disregarded as stupid before just made
him feel even more pitiful.
But if he was going to cling to it, he might as well go all the way.
Turn your thoughts away from dying. Before you die, figure out what's
happening around you.
Your eyes are dead. Your arms and legs are gone, too. What you have left is
your nose and your ears. Then you'd better use them both to death. It doesn't
matter what lingering scent I smell. It doesn't matter if all I hear are insults. I
smell the mud of the road. I smell the iron-like smell from the blood pouring
from me. Now my nose is dead. It's dead. I doubt my ears will last much longer,
either.
"…at…take the…valuables…"
"…ere! The guards! They…"
"…un! No! If we…caught, I'll…"
All I was able to pick up were those bits of conversation. That's great and all,
but the part of my brain I need to figure out what that means is already dead.
I'm dying so I just listened. I don't know if I'll remember. …What does it mean to
remember? Why do I want to remember? What does it mean to want? Why…
what?
As Subaru's brain died, his other functions followed soon after. At the very
end, with a faint sound of something being pulled from him, something
scraping…Subaru lost his life a third time
3.4
When Subaru's consciousness awakened, he was in darkness. But realizing
that it was a darkness of his own creation, he opened his closed eyelids. The
bright sunlight burned his eyes. Subaru groaned a bit and put his hand over his
eyes.
"So, kiddo. How's about that abble?"
It was a question that Subaru had grown used to hearing, in a voice he had
grown familiar with, that was lobbed at him.
His ears were in perfect working order.
The hustle and bustle of the main street was loud, and completely different
from the silence that was around him just before the end.
That was the way things were, despite the fact that, distance-wise, the silence
was in an alley just one turn off the main street.
Pretty pathetic that I couldn't even get more than one street away.
The shop owner frowned at not getting an answer to his question. As Subaru
saw the white scar being stretched across his face, he thought it made him look
even more villainous.
But Subaru knew that he was actually a really kind and thoughtful person who
was obsessed with his kid.
Of course, he probably didn't remember what Subaru did.
Thinking of that, he turned once more to the scarred shop owner.
"How many times have you seen my face so far?"
"What do you mean, 'how many times'? I haven't seen you before in my life.
The way you stand out, I don't think I'd forget you and that awful expression
you've got if I'd seen you before."
"I didn't need to hear that last part about my expression, you know? Anyway,
what's the date today?"
"It's Tammuz the 14th. At this point, according to the calendar it's halfway
through the year."
"Huh. I see. Tammuz, huh." Subaru had no idea what that date was supposed
to mean. To begin with, he had no idea how they fixed the calendar in this
world. It was probably too much to expect that they went by a solar calendar,
but he couldn't be sure.
"So anyway, kiddo. How's about that abble?"
The shop owner was patient as Subaru went silent, but for him to have to deal
with someone this long to just buy a single apple… He seemed to be reaching
his limit. His face was starting to twitch.
Now this was a guy who didn't look all that great wearing a smile in the first
place. When he was trying his best to smile, it probably had more of an effect of
scaring customers away, and Subaru felt that whatever god put this man in this
occupation was a cruel god indeed.
As for Subaru's answer to the shop owner's question, he put his hand on his
hip and proudly put out his chest.
"I'm sorry, but I'm as broke as the sky is blue!"
"Then get the hell out of here!" The shop owner's yell was enough to throw
Subaru back, and he scrambled out of there in a hurry.
I really can't go back to that shop for a while, Subaru thought, with both
meanings in mind.