Chapter 3 : The Monsters in the Woods
"Mikasa? Write that Amos sighed for the eighteenth time today." Reiner chuckled.
Nox rolled his eyes, it wasn't his fault that the summer survival training Shadis had imposed on them was deadly boring. It consisted of splitting into two teams, going to a certain point through the mountains, meet the other team, and come back. It wasn't training in the blond's eyes, it was a chore.
"Okay." Mikasa replied with a small smile.
Amos growled in annoyance as he looked around, but Reiner didn't seem willing to leave him alone.
"According to some rumors, people believe that you're gay" he said in a 'neutral' tone, "do you confirm?"
"Why? Are you afraid I'll steal Bertholdt away from you?" he asked nonchalantly without turning. "You don't have to worry about that, he's all yours."
The two taller boys widened their eyes in horror as the rest of the group bursted out laughing. Annie and Mikasa just smiled a little.
"Does this rumor really exist, though?" Nox asked once the cadets calmed down.
"Why?" Reiner asked, hoping for revenge. "Do you fear for your reputation?"
Amos pinched his sinuses and feigned a resolute sigh.
"Reiner, I am your friend, my reputation is already ruined.
Annie laughed as cruelly as briefly, everyone froze in place.
The little blonde stopped when she realized that all eyes were on her, and replied in her cold voice:
"What? Never saw someone laugh before?"
"Uh…" Franz began before taking a nudge in the ribs from Hannah.
"I'm waiting."
"Can we get back on topic?" Amos growled in order to defuse the situation. "Where does this rumor come from?"
"Some guys are convinced that you're gay, because you spend all your time with Christa without trying anything," Ymir clarified to help calm things down.
Amos let out a growl of exasperation that drew a few smiles.
"That's it? Christa is my childhood friend, it would be like dating my sister."
"That doesn't seem like a good enough reason for some," Bertholdt explained.
"Why aren't there any rumors about Eren?"
A cathedral-like silence echoed his question.
"Why would there be rumors about Eren?" Mikasa asked, confused.
Amos scanned all of his other teammates before sighing.
"Bloody cowards."
They drove off in awkward silence, leaving the Ackerman confused.
(-) (-) (-)
Once their camp was set up for the night, Amos and Annie devoted themselves to hunt something, both being tired of eating nothing but potatoes and bread for months. Unfortunately, given the late hour and after recovering a hare and a heron, they had to resign themselves to return before nightfall.
"Too bad Sasha isn't on our team," Amos sighed. "She would have cooked them better than us."
"Who ?"
"Potato Girl."
"Uh, yeah probably."
A moment of silence passed, disturbed only by the footsteps of the two teenagers, Annie finally spoke again:
"Hey, Nox?"
"Yes?"
"Why are you always lying?"
He raised an eyebrow without stopping, and replied with a shrug:
"I don't lie all the time, I just exaggerate the little I show and allow myself to keep the rest to myself. You, on the other hand, lie all the time, pretty badly dare I add."
Annie froze in place, Amos continued on his way as if nothing had happened.
"Are you planning on standing there while your heron rots?"
She raised her head and met the indifferent gaze of the young man, who sighed when he realized that she would not move.
"Listen Leonhart, I have no idea what you're playing at, but frankly you're hurting yourself for nothing."
"What are you talking about?" she growled nervously.
"When you hit too hard during hand-to-hand combat sessions, you immediately regret it, which proves that you really care despite the fact that you do everything to pretend otherwise. That's why you stay in your corner, because you don't want to get attached to anyone, for fear of ending up suffering their losses."
Annie was flabbergasted as Nox continued:
"I'm sorry to tell you this so bluntly, Leonhart, but it's too late. Can you look at me in the eye, and tell me that you won't be affected by the death of the boy you have a crush on?"
She widened her eyes.
"How do you know that…?"
"I told you already, you're a terrible liar."
The petite blonde looked down at her boots, her breathing heavy, her cheeks flushed with stress.
"Isn't it a pain in the ass?" Amos sighed in exasperation." I feel the same."
"What do you mean?" she asked intrigued, sitting up to forget her emotions.
"I wasn't supposed to get attached to anyone when I got here," he admitted with a shrug. "But… strangely… I ended up liking them. I am sure that you, more than the others, understand me. They are annoying, but they are endearing."
Annie squinted suspiciously, she certainly had no intention of being led on by honeyed words.
"I get what you mean," she admitted in a measured voice, "but you and I know, that you're not clean."
A brief burst of laughter was her answer.
"Ouch," he said, pretending to be hurt, "what do you mean by that?"
Leonhart quickly had enough of the tall blond's haughty tone, she stood in front of him and glared at him.
"You're too good," she gritted, "you're too good with ODM, riffles and maintenance to be a novice. You're a master of martial arts and your knowledge of military strategies is ridiculously flawless, all of this makes you some kind of elite soldier already overtrained. I have no idea what you're doing here, Nox, but I know you're not here to learn anything."
"Your compliments went straight to my heart," he ironically replied, smiling. "Would you like a medal for your insight?"
Annie was not amused at all, her silver-blue eyes were flashing with anger.
"Why are you here?" she growled, clenching her fists.
"That's not your real question," Amos replied, ceasing to smile. He dropped his prey and his backpack to face the little blonde.
"Your real question is: 'What are my plans for Armin.'"
Leonhart stiffened in place, her hands shaking, the anger in her eyes turned to rage, fear twisted her stomach.
None of this escaped Amos, and he wondered if this conversation was getting out of hand.
"Listen Annie," he continued with a measured voice, "I have no intention of using Armin ..."
"I don't believe you for a second," the girl hissed coldly.
"Then this conversation is pointless," Nox said, bending down to pick up her things.
Leonhart's knee hit his forehead with all the strength the teenage girl could muster, and a dull impact sound echoed through the branches of the forest.
Annie had not thought about her gesture, she had had no plan in mind, her actions had been dictated by fear, and fear only. Unfortunately, she realized too late that her survival instinct had deceived her.
Amos had taken the blow unflinchingly, and for a second, his only reaction was temporary paralysis. Then, without any kind of warning, three fingers hit the girl's throat with such violence that her eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.
Leonhart fell to her knees while desperately trying to catch her breath, but a punch to the pectoralis major definitely blocked her breath. With a gaze possessed by predation and a major bleeding from the brow bone, Amos grabbed her by the neck, pinned her to the ground, and restrained his victim's right hand by grabbing her right wrist, and crushing the left with his boot. Annie was at his mercy, unable to move or breathe, her eyes bulging with terror and horror.
For his part, Nox was furious as he had rarely been in recent months. So much so that he nearly broke the bones of the girl's collar. He exhaled loudly to control himself and approached his mad predator's gaze to face his terrified prey.
"Listen to me, Leonhart," he growled angrily, "if you put your hand on me again, I'll wring your neck, is that clear?"
The brutal lack of oxygen prevented his victim from thinking properly, blackheads began to cover her vision. The only thing she was able to do was nod slowly.
Satisfied, Amos released her and moved away to avoid being covered with the sputters that accompanied the violent fit of coughing that shook her. It took Annie nearly a minute to regain proper breathing, time her tormentor had used to pull out a small metal cylinder full of cream and a bottle of blue pills.
He covered his fingers with cream and gently applied it to the throat of the young girl who shivered in terror.
"Keep your chin up and spread your arms out to open your ribcage," he ordered after swallowing down the predation.
Annie obeyed out of fear, which was not lost on Nox, who frowned warily.
"If you're so afraid of me, then why did you attack me?"
She didn't answer, she just averted his gaze.
"Besides...why am I scaring you so much?" he asked, taking three pills out of his bottle.
Leonhart gazed at the drugs with wariness.
"Do you want to know more about me ?" he quipped. "I did not interrupt my medical studies, I finished them. So listen to the advice of the only doctor for thirty miles around and suck those pills to soothe your throat."
Annie eyed him suspiciously, before letting out an annoyed sigh. She grabbed the medicine and threw it into her mouth.
There was a moment of awkward silence, during which the girl waited for her remedy to take effect, and the young man took out a portable mirror, thread, a needle, a bottle of alcohol and a small rubber syringe.
Leonhart watched Nox as he injected himself with the content of the syringe, sterilized his needle with the flame of a match, and threaded the thread through the eye of the needle with an expert hand. Then he handed her the mirror.
"Hold this while I patch myself up," he ordered.
Annie chose to cooperate, for the moment, all her other options were bad.
"Bloody hell…" Amos growled, contemplating the wound on his face. "You got me good... neat and precise just above the arch..."
The girl only responded with a pout that meant she wasn't sorry, but judging by the tremors in her hands, she was doing her best not to look terrified.
The Adviser cleaned his wound with a handkerchief soaked in alcohol, and, under the bewildered gaze of the little blonde, began to sew his wound up, keeping a most impassive face.
"Wh… What… did you dose yourself with?" Leonhart gurgled, putting a hand to her sore throat.
"Something that won't get me high," replied the young man without looking up. "Why are you afraid of me?"
She gritted her teeth, which forced Amos to work his brains.
"If you insist on me guessing by myself…" he growled, almost annoyed by his own patience. "It was my skills that caught your attention, even more so than my lying and manipulative side. I'm an anomaly that you can't explain, and that alone is scary enough... But it's not really me you're afraid of, you fear for Armin. You are afraid of what I have planned to do with him, and according to you, I am training everyone, including Armin, to serve my interests."
Annie's gaze suddenly hardened, but her still-fresh defeat had diminished her self-confidence. She couldn't pose a real threat… for now.
"It's more than my lying-manipulative side that bothers you, it goes further… it's my profile; you yourself were the victim of a person like me…"
Leonhart sneered contemptuously.
"I'm not even surprised you figured it out," she sighed, as resolute as she was annoyed.
"And given your 'new' taste in boys…I guess we're talking about your ex?"
Annie didn't answer, she just glared at him.
"Although..." he continued, finishing the fifth stitch. You're a little young to have an ex... So let's say: a boy your age who dangled you in wonders before throwing you away like a broken toy. In short… you gave your heart away to a rich brat."
The young girl felt the old wound on her heart reopen, she gritted her teeth and held back her tears.
"No wonder you like Armin," Amos finished, wrapping a bandage around his head, "he's one of my opposites. Small, cute, innocent but not naive, weak but brave, smarter than he is strong and full of goodwill. He's the perfect boy for you."
"Shut up," Annie blurted as tears ran down her cheeks, "shut the fuck up."
Amos retrieved his mirror and put his things away, before sitting down to face the petite blonde.
"As a doctor, I regret to inform you that you have Mikasa Syndrome, and there is no cure."
Furious, Leonhart flipped him off, he smiled in response.
"Listen Annie…" he continued in a slightly embarrassed voice, "you are not totally wrong…"
He raised his hand to prevent his interlocutor from cutting him off.
"It's true that at the beginning of the classes... I trained those I selected out of interest," he admitted, exasperated by his own words. "And to be fair... it was mainly because I didn't want to be bored for three years."
Annie had expected many reasons that could have pushed Amos to use their comrades, however, boredom was not on her list. She raised her eyebrows cautiously as she swallowed the pills that had become liquid.
Nox hesitated for a moment but continued:
"Do you want to know what I'm doing here?" he sighed with a hint of disdain and annoyance. "Well, I'm here out of obligation. Basically, I had no desire to come here, and as you understood very well I never needed this training. Training others was a hobby that I wanted to turn into an investment... a bit like you with Eren."
Leonhart snorted but didn't contradict him.
"In the end… I don't want to use them anymore."
"Why?" inquired Annie doubtfully. "What changed?"
Nox shrugged. "Most of the people I've used in my life more or less deserved it."
Immersed in his memories, the tall blond began to observe the horizon with a nostalgic look and an almost paternal smile.
"Those ones…they're so ordinary and ignorant... it's maddening. From day one I had to help Armin because he couldn't do push-ups... bloody push-ups..."
He laughed, before continuing in a half-amused, half-exasperated tone:
"What kind of budding soldier can't do a push-up? And if only that was all there was... but no one here knew anything remotely useful."
He sighed deeply, but he couldn't stop smiling.
"Basically… I like them all. Eren and Jean are noisy but without them the barracks would be much less lively. Armin is a student full of good will and intellectual ambition, being his teacher is very rewarding… And I like to play chess against him."
"You beat him all the time," Annie pointed out.
"But he comes out with a new move every single new game," the Adviser explained. "In a few years he will have a very good level."
Leonhart suppressed a smile as he continued:
"Marco isn't as smart as Armin and he's a bit clumsy, but he's still an excellent student. Connie is...
He paused, took a second to think, and sighed in a resolute voice:
"... dumb as fuck. But in an entertaining way."
This time, Annie held a burst of laughter by pretending to clear her throat. Unfortunately, it painfully reminded her of the blow she had received not long ago and made her face ache. Amos handed her the bottle filled with blue lozenges from which she quickly took three more.
'Don't tell Ymir,' Amos continued, 'but she's funny. Mikasa… is the sweetest person I have ever met."
Leonhart raised a doubtful eyebrow.
"You can't see it because she keeps staring at you," Nox explained amused, "but she's really adorable."
"What did I do to her to make her look at me like that?"
"You spend too much time with Eren."
The petite blonde rolled her eyes in annoyance.
"It is him who…"
"And I told her you were responsible for my fight against her," Amos admitted bluntly.
Leonhart couldn't believe her ears, Nox took the opportunity to give her a mocking smile while motioning for her to raise her chin so he could examine her throat. Which she did with an annoyed grimace.
"I hope you now understand that every action taken against me has consequences," he said after noticing that he had probably hit less hard than he had thought.
"Yeah," she gritted, lowering her head to glare at him, "I got that."
She heaved an annoyed sigh, straightened up and picked up her heron, her interlocutor did the same with his hare and his bag.
"One would think that you like it here," she remarked, rubbing her neck, "you're brilliant, handsome and rich from what I understood ... What's so great about this place?"
Amos bursted out laughing as they continued on their way.
"I don't care about this place, it's the people I like... and Christa is happy here. For me… I would almost call it a vacation."
"A vacation ?" repeated Annie doubtfully.
Nox shrugged.
"We live in a dangerous and cruel world Annie, but we only live once. I know that I am doomed to suffer the baddest moments of my existence so... I try to enjoy the good ones."
This sentence slapped the girl in the face, she stared at him with wide eyes as if he had just turned into a titan.
A surprisingly comfortable silence settled between the two comrades, they walked a good fifty meters before Leonhart said with a hint of chagrin:
"You've changed…"
"I know," Nox replied evenly, "but I doubt that's a good thing on the long run."
She did not react to this confession, because she shared this point of view.
"Can I ask you a favor ?"
Amos laughed loudly.
"You think I'll grant you a favor after you kneed me in the head?"
"Would you like to take care Eren's training?" she cut off to escape his teasing.
The tall blond paused for a moment to meet her gaze, surprisingly, it was determination that prevailed in those blue-silver eyes of hers.
"You don't have many hobbies other than that," he pointed out, "why do you…?"
"I want to train Armin."
Amos wanted to answer but Annie went on very quickly:
"It's better for everyone; Eren will get a better teacher than me, Christa will spend more time with Ymir, you will have an extra student, Mikasa will stop glaring at me…"
"I was going to accept," Nox snapped exasperated, "even if Eren is going to be disappointed."
"Oh…"
He rolled his eyes, but managed a small smile.
"I imagine you asked me this because you need a credible excuse to dismiss Eren…
"Annie! Amos!"
Hearing Reiner's cries, the cadets cut their conversation short and sped through the forest to emerge in a clearing.
Franz, Hannah, Bertholdt, Ymir, and Reiner were inspecting the remains of an encampment while Mikasa wrote down what they were saying.
"Report !" Amos barked.
"Several ration bags used and several campfires put out, I'd say a group of people were here," Reiner replied, examining some of the burnt wood. "Recently…"
"Mikasa? Daz will write the report from now on. Do we have information about the locals around?"
"Not that I know of," replied Reiner, "what do we do?"
"Give me a second."
He stood in the middle of the camp, his facial features wrinkled and his expression firm. His eyes scanned every trace, every clue, every piece of information at breakneck speed. The various boot marks, the size of those marks, the depth of those marks, the wheel and hoof marks, the powder that fell on a pine cone, the slight gash in the stone that looked like a loaf of bread, and the pestilential smell of brandy and vomit.
"There were twenty-two of them, all men, nearly all overweight, with five carts each pulled by two horses, armed with guns but also with blades, though they weren't made of ultrahard steel. Some, if not all of them, are drunk."
He then noticed a cigarette butt which he picked up without noticing the dazed looks his teammates were giving him, Daz faithfully transcribed his every word.
"Shit," he hissed after sniffing the smell of stale tobacco.
"What is that?" Bertholdt asked worriedly.
Amos straightened up to display his find.
"This crap is the worst kind of cigarette you'll find, it's a mixture of hay and bad tobacco produced in the Underground under the Capital, in other words..."
He turned his cold gaze to the south, and hissed between his teeth.
"We have to fire a red smoke to warn the other team," Bertholdt decided, reaching into his bag.
"No! No smoke. Mikasa ?"
"Yes?"
"I order you not to rush headlong once you have obtained the information that I am about to share."
The eastern stiffened in place and put her hands on the handles of her swords.
"Amos?" Annie warned. "She's about to leave."
"Mikasa," he continued in a firmer tone without turning around, "if you disobey my order you put yourself in danger and you will delay the probable rescue operation that we will have to carry out. Calm down, that's an order."
The girl gritted her teeth before releasing her weapons, which Reiner indicated to Amos.
"These guys are Underworld human traffickers, in other words, slavers, rapists, killers, and smugglers. And they're heading straight for Team A."
Mikasa flew away the second he finished his sentence, he swore furiously.
"Team B! Follow me ! We're gonna have to make a detour to catch these assholes from behind!"
"Why are we going around?!" Ymir asked as they twirled. "Why don't we follow Mikasa?!"
"Because team A is likely to get captured before we can get there, these guys have guns, perfect weapons for humans while we're trained to kill titans."
"But Mikasa is very strong!" Hannah shouted to drown out the wind whipping her face.
"That idiot has a huge weakness named 'Eren', the moment he gets a gun pointed to his head she'll stop fighting, and let this whole herd of pigs fuck her every holes if it means the suicidal bastard will live three more seconds."
The redhead was horrified by these words, but Annie, Reiner, Bertholdt and Ymir kept their cool.
"What are we going to do?" asked an anxious Thomas.
"We should go back to Shadis!" Daz exclaimed. "He will know what to do!"
"By the time we do this, the girls will have been raped and abducted and the boys killed! We have to act now, Mikasa has already made us waste precious time by rushing into the heap. Now they will know in which direction the reinforcements are likely to arrive, hence the detour now necessary."
"What's the plan, Captain?" Reiner asked.
"Does anyone here know how to throw knives?"
"Yes, I do," Annie replied.
"Perfect, first we have to move from north to west of their position, then we will have to exercise the utmost discretion, and finally, when the time is right, we will have to take human lives."
Franz, Hannah, and Daz gulped, the other four just nodded, but it was the first three that Amos addressed.
"If you can't do that, tell me right away, but know that the fate of our comrades now rests in our hands, either we make the decision to cover them in blood to save them, or they will remain white as snow, and our comrades will perish."
Those words seemed to strengthen the resolve of two of them, but the last one looked like he was about to faint.
"Daz? You will transcribe everything I say and everything we do as quickly as possible, such is your mission. It'll save Shadis some paperwork and it'll save us some trouble."
"Yes, captain!" he hastened to reply, too happy to be spared.
(-) (-) (-)
"RELEASE US!" Eren yelled, trying to get rid of his well-knit bonds.
It was in a small clearing that the bandits had come upon the young recruits of Team A, and had stripped them of their equipment while threatening them with their weapons before tying them up. Night had fallen recently, and only the light of the torches of their captors illuminated the surroundings.
"Tss, look at this little shit!" sneered the bandit leader, a fat man with A golden tooth who kicked the boy in the head, which only succeeded in pissing him off even more.
"Eren!" Mikasa and Armin shouted.
The oriental had appeared a few minutes earlier, and had begun to cut the bandits without them being able to retaliate despite their guns. Alas, as Amos predicted, several of them seized some of their prisoners to use as hostages, and Eren was among them. Thus resulting in the surrender of the Ackerman.
The little blond, like the other members of team A was firmly tied up, Marco was sweating profusely in terror, Jean was looking at Mikasa in horror, Thomas was still unconscious, Sasha and Connie were struggling in vain, Mina had still not woken up and Christa glared at the bandits with visceral hatred.
"Max? Keep your gun on that brawler's face. It's the only way we have to subdue this little bitch."
Mikasa clenched her fists but let it go, a guy with a bloody bandage that crossed his face raised his hand.
"Can I hav' ha, pleash, bossh? That litt'e bitch cut off my noje! She killed three of our guysh!"
"The virginity of a girl of that quality for a moron like you?" Golden Tooth sneered. "Go empty your balls in another, but not the little blonde. That one's worth some money."
No-Nose looked disappointed, but was already looking around at the other girls while the fourteen other bandits with them happily exulted at the thought of raping. Mina, who had just woken up, began to cry in terror, Sasha struggled more without results, and Mikasa had only the expression of a still-fresh corpse drawn on her face, her beautiful jet-black eyes had lost all their shine.
No-Nose finally opted for Mina, the young girl with pigtails screamed in horror when the slaver's pudgy hand grabbed her belt.
Eren tried to struggle, but the so-called Max still had the barrel of his gun pointed at his head. Golden-Tooth obviously had the idea of taking Mikasa's virginity for himself, so he grabbed her by the hair to put her on all fours. The oriental did not react, she seemed cold as death and manipulable like a doll.
Suddenly, three projectiles were thrown out of the woods and bounced on the floor of the clearing repeatedly, immediately the bandits rushed to their weapons and took hostages in a panic.
"What the fuck is that?" Golden-tooth roared before turning to Eren still threatened by Max. "Are there any other brats out there?"
"B-boss?"
The fat man then glanced at the projectiles and widened his eyes, the 'projectiles' were human heads, the heads of the three men he had left as sentries while they had fun with the cadets.
"Fuck !" shouted another man, discovering the vile mutilations that his former colleagues had suffered. "I'll make those fucking brats pay!"
"They're ain't any brats!" Golden-Tooth growled through his teeth.
"So they're MPs ?! Come out you motherfuckers!" he cried in panic, grabbing Sasha by the ponytail. "Or I…!"
"Will you fucking shut up?! Do you know many MPs or kids who decapitate and mutilate prisoners?!"
"But but… ?" another, smaller bandit asked weakly. "What is it then ?"
"I don't know," Goldtooth gritted, releasing Mikasa, "but our hostages are useless."
Armin's eyes widened as realization hit him.
An evil, inhuman burst of laughter suddenly echoed through the branches, several birds flew away in terror, the recruits behind the criminals were transiting in dread.
One of the bandits panicked and fired blindly.
The sudden detonation broke the fragile nerves of his companions who imitated him in turn. The shots illuminated the surroundings for a few moments, but revealed no enemy.
"Stop! Stop for fuck's sake!"
His men took a few seconds to obey his orders, their gasping breaths drew as much smoke as their smoking weapons.
"Can't you see what they're trying to do, you dumb fuckers?! They're making us..."
Two silver bolts streaked through the air, and crashed into the heads of two bandits who collapsed almost instantly. Their cronies watched them fall for two seconds, two seconds that cost them two more men before they resumed their panic firing.
About fifteen seconds passed before the firefight was over, the criminals were clutching their riffles so much that their hands had turned white.
Golden-tooth was the only one who kept his composure and all his ammunition, he thought at top speed, he needed to find a plan quickly, otherwise they were all going to be decimated.
Two new knives sliced through the air, one lodged in No-Nose's throat, the other in Max's eye.
They were down to eight, and three seconds later they were down to six.
"Reiner!" yelled a voice that all the cadets knew.
In a blink, Reiner, Bertholdt, Ymir, Franz and Hannah fell from the sky with their blades forward ready to cut through the criminals.
Golden-tooth raised his still loaded weapon, before two grappling hooks shot out of the darkness to crash into his body. Amos propelled himself towards the leader of the bandits and cut him in three pieces, the rest of his team decapitated the others, Annie came out of hiding.
Team A gaped at them, their relief was so overwhelming that tears streamed down their cheeks.
"Is everyone okay ?" Reiner asked as he approached to free his comrades.
"R-Reiner," Mina whispered in tears.
"Ymir," Christa smiled as she released her.
"Guys," Jean blurted out once he was free.
"THANK YOU!" they all screamed, throwing themselves once free into the arms of their saviors.
"I thought we were going to die!" Sasha whimpered against Amos' chest.
« Thank you ! Thank you ! Mina whined against Reiner.
"You guys are fucking heroes," Thomas said, hugging Bertholdt.
"We love you!" Jean and Connie cried, grabbing Franz and Hannah.
"You saved our lives," Marco whispered, hugging Annie.
The latter did not know how to react, she was about to push him away when Amos grabbed her by the sleeve.
"Enjoy the good moments," he whispered, winking at her.
Leonhart winced, before turning back to Marco, and in turn closing her arms around him. The young man tightened his embrace.
"You are a hero," he said softly.
Annie froze on the spot and her teary eyes widened, it felt so good to hear that, to hear it with such sincerity. For the first time in her life, she was proud of herself.
"You're welcome," she stammered in shock.
Amos consoled Sasha for a few more moments, before turning to Armin and Eren. The two boys were kneeling next to Mikasa and the green-eyed one was shaking her, telling her to wake up.
"Mikasa?! Hey Mikasa?!"
"Stop!" Nox snapped, drawing everyone's attention to him at the same time. "Let me see her."
Eren moved aside to give her room to kneel down, the oriental girl's eyes were still so empty, as if she were in a vegetative state. A sickened shiver pierced the spine of the young man when he saw this, only predation and drugs allowed him to swallow this abject feeling.
"She's in shock," he explained impassively after examining her, "better knock her out."
With these words, he located the desired artery which he pinched to achieve the desired effect. The relief that came over him when Ackerman lost consciousness was immense.
"Reiner?" he called after she closed her eyes. "You have to carry her."
The tall blonde nodded, before picking her up bride-style.
"Listen to me," the Adviser addressed everyone, "it is useless to continue the exercise under these conditions. Collect the weapons of these bastards and let nature take care of their bodies, we will recover their carts to sleep in, with a little luck, there will also be food in there, water and feed the horses if necessary, we will use those to leave at dawn."
"Yes, Amos!"
"There must be alcohol in there too," he realized quietly before barking: "And if I catch any of you drinking, he or she will end up with my boot up its arse!"
"Yes, Amos!" resumed the recruits not really inclined to displease him.
"Wait !" cried Jaeger. "Mikasa is injured, we have to go home right away!"
"Eren," Nox cut in a calm voice, "she's not hurt but in shock, she needs rest and support when she wakes up. Moreover, we cannot travel at night, and we are all exhausted by the hardships of the day."
The boy lowered his head, before nodding. And very quickly, the recruits of the 104th cadet corps followed the instructions of their designated leader to the letter, before fainting from fatigue in the carts after recovering a trembling Daz on the way. Against general opinion, Amos volunteered for the first shift, and had been adamant about it. On the one hand he thought that everyone deserved to rest, and on the other hand, he wanted to secretly test the excellent cigarettes from Wall Maria he had found in one of the contraband boxes. So he waited until everyone had fallen asleep to find himself a slightly high point on a hill to survey the surroundings, then he lit a cigarette, and let the smoke lick his lips.
"Amos?"
"Busted," he thought with a sigh. "Yes, Armin?"
The shorter blond came to sit next to the taller blond, ignoring his smoke as much as possible.
"Your plan was brilliant," he admitted shyly, "you made them think that they were dealing with a whole different kind of enemy to negate the advantage of their hostages. It was brilliant."
"Flattery doesn't work on me, Armin," Nox said, puffing out a cloud, "even though I know it's genuine. Spit it out, what do you have to tell me?"
The little blond blushed with shame like a child caught with his hand in the cookie jar, however he ended up answering:
"I…well I wasn't sure…but lately you seem…well…more sincere."
Amos raised a questioning eyebrow, his interlocutor developed:
"At first you seemed happy to help everyone, and I believed it and I was happy to meet you. I still am, but in the last few months… your smiles, your laughter and your kindness seem more…authentic. In any case, they're different from those you showed at the start of training. Maybe it's just my imagination, but I can't help but wonder if... if at the beginning you were...
" … a liar ?" Nox finished, drawing on his cigarette. "That's exactly what I was."
Armin widened his eyes, he had been right, his instinct had not betrayed him.
Amos let out a sad smile, and lay down on the grass.
"In the future Armin, I advise you not to psychoanalyze me if you do not want to have nightmares," he said very seriously, "my thoughts are not to everyone's taste. If you want to know everything, at first I was not happy to be there, I only came by obligation, but meeting other mammals was clearly not on my list of priorities. I only helped others for the sole purpose of sweetening my time, but I took a liking to it, and I came to appreciate these people I grew up with. I started to change, to become a different person, and I like this new person to be honest. Unfortunately, I can't stay like this indefinitely, I'm going to have to… maybe go back to my old self… otherwise… I'll end up making a terrible mistake."
Armin was shocked and fascinated at the same time, he wasn't sure he understood everything, but he now knew that Amos' situation was much more complicated than it seemed. He couldn't help wondering what his friend was hiding, but one confession caught his attention.
"What do you mean 'go back to your old self?' How can you do that?"
"I told you not to psychoanalyze me," Nox growled sternly.
And the little blond fell silent.
"I hope your curiosity is sated Armin, because you won't have any other answers," he concluded, relaxing.
But as the latter had still not left, Amos had to resolve to postpone the moment of peace he craved:
"What now?"
"About Mikasa…"
"I'm going to massacre her," Nox said simply, "end of this conversation."
"Amos…"
"Armin," he replied with a firmness that left no room for negotiation, "she disobeyed a direct order, abandoned her teammates, got captured by a gang of drunk, overweight pigs, delayed Team B's rescue operation by forcing us to make a detour, endangered all of our lives and those of Team A while rushing into the pile... shall I continue?
"Amos…"
"You want more ? Have it your way, she pissed off the bandits by killing three of them before surrendering like a fool. It's a bloody miracle they didn't blow some of your brains out in retaliation, yours probably would have been one of them…although…come to think of it, cute little boys like you are worth a fortune in the bed slaves market of the Underground."
Arlet's eyes widened in horror, at which Amos raised an eyebrow.
"Yes Armin, you too have a hole."
A shiver of dread mixed with deep disgust echoed these words, and the smaller of the two blonds lowered his head. Nox took the opportunity to approach him and whisper in his ear with a cold voice:
"I'm going to massacre Mikasa, this discussion is over, go to bed, that's an order."
Armin wanted to add something… but ended up changing his mind when he realized he couldn't budge the Adviser. So he obeyed and left him with his thoughts.
Amos remained alone for the rest of his shift, peering and observing every corner of the forest around him. When he was done, he went to check if Mikasa was still asleep, before waking Reiner to take over while he went for a short errand, once he was done, he finally went to sleep.
(-) (-) (-)
The return to the training camp was triumphant in the eyes of the other recruits of the 104th cadet corps when they saw the five carts, but those who got out of the said carts were especially relieved to have returned whole. As the designated leaders of the various teams, Amos and Marco had to report to Shadis while Mikasa was rushed to the infirmary, and the other recruits got a special day off that was more than welcome.
Sitting in his office, Shadis finished reading the reports written by Daz and Armin, while Amos and Marco stood at attention awaiting his verdict.
"I see," said the head instructor in an impassive voice.
"Sir," the freckled boy declared, "I take full responsibility for my team's capture!"
"That won't be necessary, the fault is mine, I should have known that some of those pigs were wandering around in our mountains. Cadet Bott, you may leave."
"Sir," Marco saluted once again before taking his leave.
A few seconds of heavy silence passed, during which Shadis watched Amos' gaze, which retained a most neutral expression, finally he heaved a deep sigh.
"I know the jerk instructor's mummer isn't working on you, so no need to keep it for the sake of it. I'll be honest, I'm impressed. All your comrades are alive and unharmed, and all the enemies are dead, a perfect game of sorts, although it would have been better to keep one alive to interrogate."
"It was not necessary, sir."
With that, he took a golden tooth out of his pocket and placed it on his instructor's desk, said instructor picked it up and examined it. An oriental character was engraved on the object, the character that signified "love".
Shadis felt his blood boil in his veins, he couldn't read this character, but he knew what it truly meant.
"Fucking bastard," he hissed through his teeth.
Predation suddenly appeared in Amos' emerald eyes, he stopped saluting, pulled a chair, sat down, and leaned forward to rest his chin on his joined hands. The former Commander of the scouts didn't let himself be disheartened, but he gritted his teeth before the shameless insubordination of his cadet.
"Tell me, Sergent instructor," he quipped, containing his own anger, "would you mind explaining to me how twenty-two drunken pigs and five cartloads of contraband slipped through the cracks of your surveillance?"
Keith clenched his fists.
"It is obvious…"
"That they had been there for several days, in an area that should have been scrutinized, but clearly wasn't. I saw one of their camps, they had been in those mountains for at least ninety-six hours… Why wasn't this area swept?"
Looking into the eyes of Amos was a hardship for Keith. The sordid rumors he had heard about the young man kept him from raising his voice. He didn't know what kind of person he was dealing with, but he knew however, that his authority was non-existent over him.
'Yet you had the necessary manpower,' Amos continued. "Trained men that had been placed at your disposal for those specific three years."
"My instructors were perfectly capable…"
"They failed," 'Nox' snapped, not bothering to hide his contempt, "just like you. You refused to employ free and expert help out of pride alone, which endangered your best eighteen cadets. There was a time when you had the decency to wait until your soldiers graduated before sending them to the slaughter house."
Only an inhuman effort kept Shadis from throwing himself at his recruit, but that didn't stop him from shaking with rage.
Nox squinted for a moment to gauge the instructor, then leaned back in his chair.
"Your emotions bias your decisions too much, Sergeant, you did well to let Erwin take your place.
The former Commander of the Survey Corps smashed his desk with his fists and nearly roared:
"I'm not biased by my emotions!"
"Then why did you sabotage Eren's belt?"
This simple question made Shadis' anger disappear in a finger snap, the instructor widened his eyes and opened his mouth, however, he was unable to formulate the slightest word.
"You're an idiot," Amos sighed, making the predation disappear, "you knew exactly what was wrong with his belt when you pretended not to know that part could break. A problem that was not found with a basic examination. Then, you pretended that you would add it to the maintenance procedure, which you never did. With all this, the theory of sabotage and the identity of the culprit was more than obvious.
Exhausted, Keith dropped into his chair and put his head in his hands, but Amos didn't give him a moment to rest.
"What really tweaked me, was the fury with which you stared at me when I pointed out that the belt was broken. After that, I saw the few looks you gave Eren when he wasn't looking at you, and I learned from Armin that Eren looks a lot like his mother..."
"Shut up…" Shadis breathed exhausted as tears streamed down her cheeks, "Please Lord Amos… shut your mouth…"
Nox was almost surprised by the unpleasant feeling that this formalism caused him... He swept it aside to grab his instructor's notepad and a pencil. On the paper, he scribbled an address and a name. Then he grabbed the half-burned candle lying on the desk, lit it with a match and poured the melted wax on another sheet of paper. After which, he took a ring from his pocket and applied a bat-shaped seal. Then he tore off the two sheets and handed them to Shadis.
"Send a letter to that psychiatrist," he advised the blank-eyed instructor. "She lives in Trost, you can visit her on your day off. I will pay for your therapy."
Shadis stared at the sheets of paper with a confused grimace, before picking it up and looking up.
"You have personal issues to deal with, it shouldn't impact your work, let alone your cadets," Amos replied, anticipating the "why."
With that, he rose from his chair to leave the office, but stopped before he reached the door.
"What are you going to do with Mikasa?"
Shadis put the sheets down, wiped his face with the back of his sleeve and replied while swallowing his emotions as much as possible:
"First, wait until she wakes up, then send her to a counseling cell."
Amos gritted his teeth, this was not ideal, the psychological support cells kept patients too long before they were operational again. But there was a way, a way that Amos Nox was loath to use, his 'former self', on the other hand, would do it without hesitate.
"May I make a request, sir?"
Shadis almost laughed when he heard the word "Sir" come out of the damn kid's mouth.
"I'm listening."
"It's not necessary to waste so much time, I think I'll be able to get her back on her feet before the day is over."
Shadis raised one of his nonexistent eyebrows and looked at the young man again.
"If you want to spend your only day off doing that, that's your problem… rookie. But if you make her condition worse, know that every other cadet will find out one way or another."
The confident and amused smile displayed by the tall blond horrified the instructor who had to contain himself even more.
"Thank you sir. This threat made more sense than all the others."
"Shut up, you fucking brat," grated the ex-Commander at his wit's end. "You may leave."
"Sir," he said before leaving while Keith frowned his nonexistent eyebrows. He looked at the two sheets his recruit had left him, one was blank apart from the bat-shaped seal at the bottom of the page. The other contained the name and address of a Doctor Victoria Val. Exhausted by his trying conversation with the Adviser, the Sergeant-Instructor took out the file of the cadet to add an appreciation.
"Amos Nox, the unofficial leader of the 104th. Exceptional in all subjects, Amos earned the trust and respect of almost all of his fellow students. However… his questionable psychiatric history makes him manipulative, unpredictable and extremely violent in many ways. He could be his regiment's greatest ally, or its worst enemy."
(-) (-) (-)
Amos headed straight for the infirmary as soon as he was outside, he reeked of stale tobacco and still had Golden-tooth's blood on his clothes. Which was perfect in his opinion.
When he entered the infirmary, he was surprised to discover that the oriental lying on a bed had her eyes open, but her still empty pupils stared at the ceiling with a glazed look.
Nox suddenly felt a series of images, each more horrible than the next, invade his brain. He remembered a cell, gunshots, whippings, and incessant barking. As his emerald eyes failed to spring from their sockets, following the lightning pains which seemed to radiate every part of his body, he hastened to take a small syringe out of his inside pocket before injecting the contents into his neck. Seconds later, he took a very deep breath, as if he had been underwater for too long, and a wave of relief washed over him. That's when the predation returned to his gaze, and stared at Mikasa with deep displeasure. Nox grabbed a chair to sit beside her. He snapped his fingers several times in front of her eyes, with no results, he flicked her nose, still nothing, he toyed with the idea of slapping her, but that would probably do more harm than good, so he chose a more sentimental approach. He calmly cleared his throat and sang:
Habataitara modoranai to itte
Mezashita no wa aoi aoi ano sora
"Kanashimi" wa mada oboerarezu
"Setsunasa" wa ima tsukamihajimeta
Anata e to idaku kono kanjou mo
Ima "kotoba" ni kawatte iku
Mikasa raised an eyebrow.
Michi naru sekai no yume kara mezamete
Kono hane wo hiroge tobitatsu
She blinked.
Habataitara modoranai to itte
Mezashita no wa shiroi shiroi ano kumo
Tsukinuketara mitsukaru to shitte
Furikiru hodo aoi aoi ano sora
Aoi aoi ano sora
Aoi aoi ano sora
Mikasa widened her eyes in a spiral of emotions
Aisou tsukita you na oto de
Sabireta furui mado wa kowareta
Miakita KAGO wa hora sutete iku
Furikaeru koto wa mou nai
"Kaa-chan," she breathed weakly.
Takanaru kodou ni kokyuu wo azukete
Kono mado wo kette tobitatsu
She began to sit up, slowly but surely, her eyes and her skin regained color.
Kakedashitara te ni dekiru to itte
Izanau no wa tooi tooi ano koe
Mabushisugita anata no te mo nigitte
Motomeru hodo aoi aoi ano sora
Her breathing, almost non-existent until then, suddenly accelerated and she gasped, she did not seem to believe her ears
Ochite iku to wakatte ita
Sore de mo hikari wo oitsuzukete iku yo
Tears streamed down her cheeks as she now sat up in bed, her gaze now filled with life and emotion.
Habataitara modoranai to itte
Sagashita no wa shiroi shiroi ano kumo
Tsukinuketara mitsukaru to shitte
Furikiru hodo aoi aoi ano sora
Aoi aoi ano sora
aoi aoi ano sora
When Amos finally finished his song, he crossed his arms and legs as he waited for the girl to finish coming back to her senses. Which still lasted a few minutes.
When at last, she turned to him, her soft and amazed gaze clashed against the hard and furious look that the young man had prepared especially for the oriental girl who almost jumped in fright.
"Slept well ?" he sneered before noting: "you don't look happy to see me."
Mikasa took a few glances around to find out where she was, before suddenly being attacked by a crushing migraine, all the memories of the bandits' attack suddenly reentered her brain, and she grabbed her head with her two hands.
"Eren!" she cried, remembering the image of her adoptive brother with a riffle pointed at his head.
She wanted to get out of bed but Amos grabbed her firmly by the shoulder.
"He's fine," he informed her, trying to keep his voice free from any form of exasperation, "stay in your bed, you've been through a traumatic experience."
Mikasa seemed to hesitate for a few moments, before Golden tooth's sneering face suddenly entered her mind. Her gaze darkened.
"What happened to the bandits? »
"All dead, Annie, Reiner, Bertholdt, Ymir, Hanna, Franz and I killed them."
"And the guy with the gold tooth?"
"His blood is still on my uniform, I cut him in three."
His eyes slid over the impressive red stains that adorned the young man's clothes, but his face remained impassive.
"I see."
Without warning, Amos seized her by the collar, and pressed his forehead against hers, the oriental woman widened her eyes in front of the face deformed by the rage of her torturer.
"Listen to me!" he shouted coldly, "your impulsiveness and fucking obsession almost cost us dearly! It's a goddamn miracle that those bastards didn't kill several members of Team A out of revenge after your pitiful attempt! You put us all in danger, all of us! You had no consideration for any of us, not even Armin! Not even you! You were ready to let nineteen drunken pigs shove you through every orifice of your body under Eren's gaze! Do you have any idea what he would have felt like to see such a thing?! I'm sure he would have rather died a million times than see you suffer such an atrocity!"
Mikasa gasped and her eyes widened, she felt like her heart had been ripped out of her chest.
"I get that you love Eren, but you have no rights! You hear me ?! No right to betray all your comrades! You are the strongest, the most gifted with the sword and with ODM. Others admire you, they put their trust in your hands! A trust you spat on as soon as you stopped giving a fuck about their lives! What the fuck would you have done if Sasha had been raped and enslaved?! Would you have gone to her village to announce it to her family?! Then you would then have seen the irreparable damage that your mistake almost cost them!"
Horrified, Mikasa covered her ears, curled up, and bursted into tears.
Amos didn't diminish his ire, but he no longer saw the point of continuing to enumerate the multiple consequences that the girl's disastrous decision could have caused. She had hit rock bottom, now it was up to her to pick herself up.
So he waited, ten minutes, then twenty, in the end, it took twenty-seven minutes for the Oriental to finally raise her head, her eyes red with tears.
"Forgive me."
"No," he said simply, "you don't deserve it."
Mikasa hugged her knees to her chest, gnawed with shame.
"Not yet in any case," he continued much more calmly, "you made a mistake, a mistake that could have costed a lot, but fortunately it was not the case. Now what are you going to do about all this, will you learn from this mistake? Will you live up to the expectations and trust placed in you? Will you be able to control your emotions in order to make the right decisions? You have only two options Mikasa: you fight to improve yourself, or you drown in self-pity. What do you choose?"
The oriental was taken aback, she stared at the young man with a panicked look.
"A decision, Ackerman," he growled harshly. "Do you drown or do you fight?"
" Fight !"
Mikasa paralyzed on the spot, her teeth gnashed, she clutched her sheets so hard that her knuckles turned white.
" Fight ! Fight ! FIGHT ! "
"I'll fight," she replied with newfound confidence.
"Stand up then," Nox ordered, holding out his hand.
The oriental seized it and let herself be straightened, her gaze filled with a new determination.
"Good," the young man sighed, patting her on the head to her displeasure, "glad to have you back."
Mikasa took a deep breath, before noticing the vile stench escaping from the blonde.
"You need a shower," she stated.
"So do you," he replied in the same tone.
With those words, he headed for the boys' bathroom, where he was sure he wouldn't find anyone at this hour. But Mikasa grabbed him by the arm, and held him firmly.
"Where did you learn to speak this language?" she asked dryly.
He answered with a smile, and the girl frowned. It wasn't Amos' smile, it wasn't the smile she knew, it was...something else.
Nox put his free hand on her shoulder before suddenly squeezing it, Mikasa immediately felt her muscles relax and Amos took the opportunity to extricate himself from her grip.
"Watashiniha himitsu ga arimasu (I have a secret)," he said before slipping away, leaving the girl alone with her questions.
(-) (-) (-)
Mikasa and Amos had, each on their side, joined the common bathroom dedicated to their respective sex. Both spent long minutes washing off the stench they had accumulated during their last exercise, which was not easy. It would seem that the sweat of Golden tooth for one and his blood for the other stuck to their skins, they rubbed vigorously until they reached a satisfactory cleanliness and came out of their cabins on each side to observe their own face in the their respective mirror.
Mikasa thought back to her conversation with Eren, when she had finally decided to speak to him openly. To explain to him why she had to protect him, why he meant so much to her.
"I have to protect you, Eren. That's why I have to keep improving too."
"Baka…"
She had failed, and spectacularly enough, her adoptive brother had nearly witnessed firsthand the horrific fate he had saved her from all those years ago. She understood now why he had rejected her help for so long, why he had been annoyed by her behavior, she was the very one who had almost doomed them all."
"You had no consideration for any of us, not even Armin!"
Amos' words tore her heart again. How could she ignore Armin? Her lifelong friend was also a member of her family, and she almost had him killed.
"Not even for yourself!"
Mikasa had never thought about that, for her, nothing else mattered but Eren's survival. She was ready to sacrifice herself for him, to sacrifice this life he had saved without even thinking about the consequences it could have had on him. Now she realized how much she, as a person, mattered. She wanted to protect her family at all costs, but she was so obsessed with the idea that she had almost forgotten that her friends also saw her as such. She had been annoyed with Eren's impulsiveness and the lack of consideration he seemed to have for her life for a very long time, without even realizing that she was doing the same thing.
"Hypocrite..."
"Will you live up to the expectations and trust placed in you?"
Mikasa gritted her teeth, she would never make such a grotesque mistake again! Never again would she betray the trust that Eren, Armin and all their comrades had placed in her! Never again ! Never again !
"You have only two options Mikasa: you fight to improve yourself, or you drown in self-pity. What do you choose?"
The oriental had felt sorry for her fate enough, she had to move on.
" Fight ! Fight !"
"Fight…" she whispered, "Fight…" Fight! »
Her fist collided with her reflection, smashing the mirror into a cluster of shards that strewn across the floor. She looked at the back of her bloody hand, and with her fingernails removed the bits that had penetrated her skin.
"Fight and improve," she concluded before leaving to get dressed, starting with her scarf.
But as she buttoned up her shirt, she thought of the song Amos had sung. She didn't know this song, but his oriental was perfect, it didn't have a trace of any particular accent. She hadn't spoken her second native language since she was nine, how did Nox know her? Had he learned it in his school in Sina? Were there other Orientals there?
She frowned once dressed, something was wrong. She didn't know what, she didn't know if she should worry about it or just consider that he had a right to privacy, but it was way too much of a concern for her to stop thinking about. .
What was he hiding?
(-) (-) (-)
On his side of the showers, Amos was… confused. He stared at his right hand with a glassy gaze, frowning.
"What is happening to me ?" he whispered to himself. "Why do I feel remorse? I…why am I sorry…?"
His eyes widened as he realized what he was saying, and immediately began to clench his fist in rage and frustration.
"What the fuck is this?!" he thought furiously. "Since when did I get so weak?!" What's wrong with me?! It is not me ! It's not who I am! I... I can't be like that! Otherwise… Otherwise she will…"
He grabbed the sink with both hands and glared at himself.
" Remember !" He ordered himself. "Remember what you swore to be!" Remember what made you!"
A multitude of images crossed his mind, most of them were tears, sweat and blood. Only a few smiles sometimes came to water the fire that burned deep in his bowels.
" Mother !" cried a voice.
" SILENCE !" he roared inwardly. "I command you to shut up! Don't call her that! Every thought you give her is a victory for her! "
He inhaled deeply through his nose, before releasing everything in a silent gasp that managed to partially relax his muscles.
Predation had regained its natural dominance in his gaze, and the brilliance that gleamed from it drew a smirk from him and gave him a pleasant sense of security.
"That's better," he thought before raising an eyebrow, "I wonder what's wrong with me..."
Suddenly, a deafening crash was heard, and the wall on which hung the mirror which reflected him shook. Amos raised both eyebrows in surprise, before chuckling softly.
"Looks like she's back on her feet," he thought smugly, "that's a good thing, an Ackerman doesn't belong on the sidelines."
With that, he dressed calmly while being careful not to wrinkle his shirt, and walked out while Mikasa was wondering about him.