The cool wind touched my skin as the ship sailed to the east. The waves of this sea were different; they were turbulent and angry. It reflects the anger that I've been feeling after stepping on Techne Island.
Citizens from the North told us before that the East is a treacherous place. It's full of wicked people that bring each other down. But as I looked at these people that I'm sailing with, all of them looked hopeless and not the type of people who desperately seek power. Unlike them.
I felt safe.
The ship arrived, and the sky is already full of stars. I was clueless about Adwin's whereabouts; they only stated that they would bring him here. I started to ask around the town where the police station was, and I managed to walk an hour to get there. I was begging the heavens for Adwin to be safe. I wish nobody's treating him badly again.
"Excuse me, is there a man named Adwin here?" I asked the officer.
He looked at me, then looked at his files. "The one who just arrived, yes. He's here, who are you?"
I coughed. "I am his wife, and... I would like to bail him out of this jail."
I paid the full amount and waited for it to be processed. Today was draining and tiresome, and I dozed off to sleep on a chair. I woke up the next morning with great news. They will set Adwin free today.
"Amore!" My husband gasped and ran towards me. I cried as we hugged each other. I felt it. I felt how tight the embrace was. We were both scared, helpless, enraged, and sad. "Why did you choose to stay here?"
I smiled bitterly and wiped my tears away. "I've got nowhere to go. You told me to chase my dreams, but all I could ever think about is you."
He couldn't stop crying and hugged me again. "I'm so glad you chose me, and I'm sorry."
"Shush. Let's sort things out first."
The East was not so bad after all. The place looked dull, but it felt safer. We sat on a bench near the coast and watched the angry sea. The scent of morning dew made me relax. And seeing Adwin beside me made me feel secured.
We are far from the artists who abused us; somehow, my fear of them showing up lessened. I remembered that as we stayed in a hospital for days, I would always experience nightmares. I can't remember what happened exactly that night. I can't remember the people who did this to us. I had memory loss, and Adwin was aware of it.
Like I said, we talked about our next move. We started planning things ahead, leaving the painful past behind. We bought land, and it was on top of a hill. We started from scratch and eventually got back on track. Our house was built a few days later. It's completely different from the house that we bought, but I'm okay with it. As long as I'm with him, as long as we're away from them,
Adwin started applying for different jobs so we could meet our basic needs. I also insisted on working for us, joining a group of people who harvest at the field. I found happiness in what I do each day, but I found it unfair somehow. We work all day under the sun, spending most of our energy and time, only to gain a few cents.
One night, the two of us just got home from a tiring day. I sat on a chair, catching my breath, while he went straight to the kitchen to cook. I followed him and leaned on the dining table.
"Adwin, would you like to be a painter again?" I asked.
He gave me a confused look. "What?"
"Sometimes I watch you work and wonder what it feels like to do something you're not passionate about. It must have been very heavy for you." I grabbed a box under the table and handed it to him. "I was able to save up to give you this." I smiled at him.
"What's this?" he said, and I started opening my present. He gasped. "Where did you get this?"
"It was my co-workers. She told me she'd throw them all away, but I bought it instead," I said.
"But it's forbidden here in the East. We're not allowed to paint here; they might hurt us again." It was evident that he was reluctant. I gave him a reassuring smile and held his hand.
I forgot what happened that night, but I remembered that Adwin never had a huge scar on his left hand. I lowered the volume of my voice. "You can paint here, secretly, without them knowing. I know you want to paint. It's okay if you don't gain money from it. Just make it your hobby again," I said, kissing his left hand.
"What did I even do to deserve someone like you?" He said, using his right arm to hug me.
"Oh, please, you're the one who saved me from the beginning."
Weeks passed by, and his genuine smile came back. After work, I would always watch him paint again. Day by day, he trained himself to use his right hand to paint because he couldn't move his dominant hand just like before. It was a secret between the two of us. Since painting in this region seemed like a crime.
"What happened?" I asked my co-worker.
I was about to go to work, but there were police cars on the side of the street. It's close to our headquarters, which made me nervous immediately.
"Avo's dead," she answered.
"What?" I asked. My body felt paralyzed, trying to understand what's happening in front of our eyes.
"They found out that she's still painting in her house. She's a rule-breaker," she said sadly. I gulped. The paint that I gave Adwin, I bought it from Avo.
"She just painted! Why did they kill her?" I exclaimed.
My co-worker shrugged. "That's how it works here. They can do whatever they want to people like us, so if I were you, you shouldn't even think of doing so."
My feet dragged me towards the hill. I ran inside our house and forced the door to open. I was breathing heavily and looking around the house to see if something had happened.
"Are you alright? Why are you in a hurry?" My husband asked, trying to calm me down.
Tears started falling from my eyes. "You're safe; you're here. Thank goodness." I sighed in relief.
"Did something happen?" he asked, caressing my hair.
I nodded slowly. "I... I think you should stop painting. M-my co-worker was... my co-worker painted and... and... she was killed. I don't want you to face the same fate. Please, let's stay safe."
"Nothing bad will happen to me, amore. I'll hide every art material in this house and I'll never paint again. I promise," he agreed to what I said without hesitation.
He held onto his promise and gave up on being a painter completely. I felt ashamed that I wanted him to bring back his old habit, but when I saw what happened to Avo, I felt scared again.
The original plan before getting on this island happened differently. Living in the East was not part of our plan. Our possessions and dreams were stolen, but we never gave up on each other. Five years after moving here, we decided to create our own family. We waited for years so we could save a lot of money to ensure that our child would never get hungry.
In 1985, I gave birth to my morning dew, Iseul.