"Who are these?" he asked, referring to the blonde stick figure twins in almost every painting under that category.
"Some assholes in my high school. I can't remember their names, as a matter of fact, I can't remember most people's names, hence the reason why I nickname people. I called them 'The Blonde twins' "
He studied these paintings critically until they clicked.
The phantoms must have been the voices that kept haunting her,
And those twins that stood eerily in almost every painting under that category must have played a very big role in whatever happened to her.
As a matter of fact, he could swear on his entire riches that they were the 'They' she was referring to during her breakdown.
'What could they have done?'
He wanted to ask her to explain more about all these to him.
Who were they?
What did they do?
How did they affect her?
And most importantly... How could he help her aside from using those drugs?
They were pressing violently at the back of his head that the only relief was to let them out,
But if these reflected her innermost emotions, didn't that mean she was opening up to him by allowing him to see these?
She was finally beginning to trust him bit by bit.
Though slow, it was a gradual process, and he was willing to wait for her to fully trust him and open up to him herself than to begin pressing questions at what still seemed like an open wound.
"Whatever happened here is why you take those drugs, isn't it?"
"Just one of them. Those drugs help me with many other things too" She delivered a discerning look.
He sighed.
"You're very strong, love, you don't need those drugs. They only give you short-term relief, making you dependent on them, cause you more harm than you know, and you know it"
"I don't want to talk about this," She said actively.
"I just want you to understand that I destroyed those drugs because I care about you. That was for your own good"
"Great! Another person who believes they know what is good for me and what isn't. I guess you've also forgotten that I'm not a fucking child!" she complained and rolled her eyes sarcastically.
"Just loosen your guard and be more open to people who care about you, then you'll see that you don't need those pills. There is a reason why we all have companions in this life"
She stared at him mistrustfully.
"Are you trying to say that I should trust you?"
"Is that a sin?"
She laughed.
That had to be a joke.
But there was nothing funny in the stern intensity of his eyes looking straight into hers, nor how close they were to each other.
"Weren't you the one that said trust, emotions, and all that shit were nothing but obstacles and weaknesses on the path to greatness?" she mocked.
"With you..." he took her hands in his larger ones.
"It's different" and stared deep into her eyes.
She fell into them for a second and got lost in what seemed like an endless haze of glorious, angelic, shimmering green, as thick as an enormous forest grove.
"For some reason, I want you to be secure and happy, to live your life without the fear of these things, and without being dependent on those drugs"
She pulled her hand out of his grip.
"It's not that simple, Ace. To make memories is one thing, and to forget them is another. Whether good or bad, memories will stay with you forever, and some people are not just cut out to stand them no matter how hard they try.
Some memories will haunt you forever, and there is nothing one can do about it. You can only block them out, but for how long?
They will be at the back of your mind waiting to torment you at any chance gotten"
She turned to him and placed one hand on his bicep while staring at him with eyes full of emotions and the most profound form of sincerity he had ever seen.
"You're right. Taking those drugs is damaging my health, but if you were in my shoes, what would you do?"
He was silent.
"If you could feel half of what I go through, you'd see that I have no choice"
She turned and walked towards the window staring at the lights from the city stretched as far as the eye can see, like a huge blanket spread out on top the earth.
"I have to smile and pretend that I'm fine so that it would just confuse all those watching, scheming, and waiting for me to fall off balance. It didn't matter how bad it was, how much it hurt me, or even how frustrated it made me feel. My only option was to act as if it was all okay.
But acting also gets frustrating. You get tired of putting up the act in public and breaking down in private, you get tired of hiding what is wrong and wish someone could see right through you, you get tired of constantly being afraid and insecure all the fucking time. And most importantly, you get tired of all the dark thoughts that would flood the mind in dark moments.
And when you get fed up with all of it, you become desperate for something that can block out all those thoughts and feelings, something that can just make you go numb and forget all your worries.
If you have lost your peace at least once before, you'll realise how precious it is.
You won't mind searching to the ends of the earth, or sacrificing all your riches just to get what can put your mind at rest"
She sniffled.
"Do you really think someone that has been deprived of something as valuable as their peace of mind would throw it away just because what they're doing or using to keep that peace is unhealthy and maybe even bad?"
He walked up to her and turned her around.
He slid his arm down to her waist, pulling her close to himself, he then cupped her face and tilted her head so their eyes could meet.
His heart cracked at tears glistening in her eyes, ready to drop on the signal of an unknown trigger.
"Let me be that something to block all of those dark thoughts out, that item to give you your rightly deserved peace of mind when you're troubled" he rasped.
A small pained laugh left her lips.
"Something that gives you peace of mind has to be something you trust wholeheartedly" she countered, "No offense, but... I don't trust you"
Another blow to his ego.
No girl, or anyone had ever refused something he was offering.
He was just offering his help and she rejected it. What would happen if he decided to propose to her?
But he wasn't giving up.
Helping her was more than an achievement, or something to add to his ego,
He wanted to help her because she didn't deserve to go through what she was going through.
"Then give me a chance"
She released an inappropriate laughter that went on for what seemed like forever.
Here he was offering his care to a broken lady and all she could reply with was what seemed like a mocking laughter.
She tapped her chin repeatedly as though she was in thought.
"That is actually not a bad idea... Not happening!" her expression dropped in the blink of an eye to the calm, stable, organized, and sultry one she always had on.
"I only have one heart, Ace," she faced the window again.
"I'd be dumb to let another person break it again"
"I'm not another person"
"Hmm... I wonder where I've heard that from," she said sarcastically.
"You've trusted me this far to bring me here and you don't regret it, what's wrong with trusting me again?"
"I don't know, maybe it's because you've said this very same thing to other girls before me, and you've still broken their hearts"
"I wanted nothing more than sex from those girls, but I want more than that from you" he explained.
She stared at him up and down for any sign of a double meaning to what he was saying, but she found none.
"I won't force you. If you want to trust me, it's your choice. Do what you want to do"
She took a few steps towards her and leaned in so close that Anaya had subconsciously caught her breath in anticipation as she clung to the sill of the window below her buttocks.
"But just remember that whatever decision you make, I will still be there for you at any time"
He swiftly left a peck at the tip of her nose, grinned playfully, and backed away.
She couldn't find her voice and was trying to register everything he said in her brain when he began talking again.
"If we're done here, let's get going before the weather changes again"
"I... We should be going home. I've had enough fresh air tonight" she announced.
She could hardly believe he meant everything he said.
He was a cold, selfish, ruthless, heartless man who only associated with people he could use for his own benefit.
But then again, he seemed serious.
Now she was in a dilemma on whether to still keep her guard up, or let it down and trust him.
"Aren't you going to lock the house?"
She was too deep in thought to even realize that they had reached the door.
She switched off all the lights and locked the house up, then she got in steps behind me until she was beside him.
She stole a glance at him.
Calm, cool, nicer-looking... Wasn't he the same person who forcibly married her, caged her, and restricted her life?
Why was he being so nice to her now?
'Come può qualcuno essere così duale? [How can someone be so dual]?"