He kissed me, his lips soft and tender against mine. It felt like a rush of something pure and innocent, swirling through my senses. But suddenly, he pulled away, taking several steps backward out of the water.
Confusion flooded over me. "What's wrong?" I asked, my voice filled with bewilderment as I watched him retreat, distancing himself from me.
Stepping out of the water, I approached him, but he avoided meeting my gaze. He wrapped his arms around himself, trembling as if he had suddenly caught a chill.
I stood in front of him, tears welling up in my eyes. "Tell me, what's wrong?" I pleaded, but he remained silent.
It was my first kiss, and why was he acting so upset, as if he regretted it? I turned away, walking away from him, no longer wanting to see his face.
After walking for some time, I found a place to sit. I didn't know where I was, but I didn't care. I hugged my legs, burying my face in my knees as tears streamed down my cheeks. Why? Why did he do that? Even if the kiss was bad, couldn't he have hidden his disappointment? Did he have to hurt me by acting that way? Countless thoughts swirled through my mind, making me tremble. Cold goosebumps rose on my arms, causing me to shiver. I had caught a cold. But the physical coldness couldn't compare to the ache in my heart. I regretted going out with him. I should have stayed.
****
Regan took a deep, trembling breath and looked down at his shaky hands. His nails had returned to normal, and his teeth were no longer sharp. But what had just happened? Everything was fine until he kissed her, and with just a taste of her lips, his inner beast began to stir. This was the way he used to feel when anger took hold of him, and his beast would become enraged, driving him to commit terrible acts against those who provoked him. But over time, he had learned to control his anger and keep his beast in check.
It had been so long since he had felt this way, his inner beast crawling beneath his skin and struggling to emerge. He thought they had made peace. Why did it have to happen now, with her? Why?
He was relieved that he hadn't done something terrible to her as he often did when his beast was enraged. He saw the hurt in her eyes when he rushed away from her, and he understood why she left. He couldn't even bring himself to stop her or go after her. First, he needed to calm his beast.
****
I sat down, curling up into a ball, shivering and trembling. The cold had worsened, and I couldn't bear it any longer. I stood up, intending to find my way back to Regan. But no matter how hard I tried, I always ended up in the same place. It became clear that I was lost. The night grew darker, and fear crept into my heart. I screamed Regan's name multiple times, but he never answered.
Feeling like a scared and lonely child, I trembled and sat back down, tears streaming down my face. Where was Regan? Why wasn't he coming to find me?
"Nora..." I turned to look at him but quickly averted my eyes.
"Let's go home," he said, approaching me.
Go home? Was that all he was going to say after what he had done to me? No apology or explanation for his actions, and he expected us to go home together?
"I'm not going anywhere with you," I insisted, standing up to leave.
He glared at me and grabbed my arm, pulling me closer until my head was almost against his chest. He raised my chin with a curled index finger, ensuring that I met his narrowed gaze.
"You better listen to me, Nora."
"Or what?" I challenged.
He let go of me, taking a deep breath. "Or you'll regret what I'll do to you," he said in a menacing tone. The kind he never used when talking to me.
I swallowed hard, looking at him. "Fine then, you better explain when we get home," I said, walking away while he followed closely behind.
We arrived in our chamber. I crossed my arms over my chest and stood in front of him. "Why did you do that?" I asked.
"Do what?"
Why have you changed so much lately? Acting rudely and threatening me by saying you'll feed my body to the dogs and I'll regret what you'll do to me? Why? What will you do? I spatted out rudely.
I saw a glint in his eyes as he looked at me. He closed the book he was reading and stood up. An evil smirk appeared on his lips as he moved toward me, causing me to step back in fear until my back hit the wall. I wished the wall wasn't there.
"You want to know what I'll do to you?" His hand landed on the wall above my head, trapping me with his much larger body. His other hand brushed the hair away from my face, tucking it behind my ear, giving him full access to my face. He slowly brought his mouth to my neck and brushed his lips against my earlobe. "If I've changed so much, Nora, then by now... I would have shredded your dress with my hands until you're naked. By now, I would have pinned your naked body to the bed, torture you until your body arches beneath me, on the verge of shattering."
I felt myself almost faint as he continued speaking in a ragged whisper. "I would kiss every inch of your body, kiss my way down to your thighs, and taste you with my tongue. I wouldn't stop until you began to throb with desire, until your entire body was aroused and trembling. I would do all sorts of wicked things to you, things a man might do to a woman, until you began to beg," he whispered near my ear, his warm breath sending shivers down my spine.
My heart pounded hard in my chest, causing me to struggle for breath. Sweat dripped from my forehead, and heat spread throughout my body as he spoke those words to me. Oh, Lord, I needed air. I needed to get away from him, but I couldn't move. My body trembled, and my legs felt weak. Desperate for air, I placed my hands on his chest to push him away, but he scoffed.
"Why don't you want me to do things to your body, heart, and soul, Nora?" he asked, and I blinked. I didn't know. Maybe I was just scared, even though my heart raced with excitement. Or maybe I wasn't ready, even though my whole body trembled.
He released me, and I took a deep breath. "Maybe one day you'll let me do these things to you and even more," he breathed and took a few steps back.
"I won't sleep here tonight," he said, and I glanced at him.
"Why?"
"I don't think I'll be able to control myself as I promised," he answered and walked toward the door. "Goodnight, Nora," he said finally and left the room.
Now, I was alone. I lay on the bed, lost in my thoughts. He had never approached me like this before, so direct. It only added to my confusion.
He said he would kiss me, so why did he act as if he regretted it? Why did he act cold and then say he would pin my naked body the bed and torment me? Did he actually like me? Or was he just...
I was really confused. After questioning myself with no answers, I fell asleep.