After walking for a while, I finally arrived at my classroom. I sat down on the bench and gazed out of the window, thinking about what had just happened.
I said something really cruel. I shouldn't have let my emotions get the best of me like a child. But I just couldn't wrap my head around that girl's way of thinking.
She always comes to my house. Cooks for me, and it tastes good so I let her. But it's really not normal for a girl to cling to someone like me.
Love? Ha, I don't like hearing that word. Or rather, I don't deserve to receive it. Even my parents never gave me something called 'love'.
I once overheard my parents arguing. It seems that I was the product of my father's lustful desires. When he was dating my mother, he couldn't control himself and I was born. And that's why they got married. My father just wanted to take responsibility, but.
What is responsible?
The relationship between my parents has never been good. Every time they meet, they always argue with my mother blaming my father's actions. Well, anyone would be angry if they experienced what my mother did. Because of their bad relationship, they never came home and left me alone.
Even though they were at home, I didn't like it because my parents would look at me with hatred. As if I were a bringer of disaster and the cause of their marriage problems.
In simpler terms, I am their illegitimate child. Hahaha, that's too harsh, isn't it? I don't care in the end, I am just trash and not worthy of anyone. That's why my older classmates bully me.
No matter what I do, I am an unwanted existence. That's why I feel strange and uncomfortable when there's suddenly someone like Nana who is kind-hearted. It doesn't mean I reject her kindness, it's just that...
"Yo, Ayato! You haven't forgotten about what happened yesterday, right?"
A group of three people were walking together. One of them, who was big and had just spoken, was named Kisaki.
"Hey! Did you hear what I said?!" Kisaki grabbed my shirt collar and stared into my black eyes.
I'm really sick of everything...
Look at those cowards, they're not even trying to help...
They just stare, show pity, and leave me behind...
In the end, I'm just an unwanted existence...
"Hey, say something!"
"Yeah, I brought it. Just wait a minute, I'll go get it-"
*Crack*
A hard punch hit my cheek. My weak and feeble body couldn't bear the pain and easily collapsed against the classroom wall.
"You're too slow! Useless. I'll get it myself!"
Kisaki stared at me with emotion, then he roughly dug into my bag.
"Look at this, guys!"
he called out, as if he found something interesting. Two of Kisaki's friends formed a circle and looked at the item he referred to. Then they laughed together. And I could guess what it was.
"Hahaha... a boy carrying a teddy bear keychain?? Disgusting," Kisaki still held the keychain and looked at it.
The teddy bear keychain was a gift from Nana to me. She gave it to me for my birthday. At first, she didn't know that it was my birthday, so she didn't have much time to find a present for me. Nana said that next year she will give me something more fitting.
But you know what, Nana? Even something simple like this makes me happy. It is the first gift given to me by someone. So that's why my emotions overflowed when I saw Kisaki and his two friends mocking the hanging ornament. It felt like they were mocking Nana.
Without realizing it, my emotions burst out and I said loudly, "Don't touch it with your dirty hands!"
One simple sentence that could stir up Kisaki's emotions and surprise the entire class. They might not have thought that I would dare to say that.
Well, whatever it is, I'm better than you who just watch without trying to help.
Trying to suppress Kisaki's emotions, his friends gave me a cold smile. Without waiting long, they kicked and stepped on my body.
"He's dared to speak up, boss!"
"Kisaki, let's teach him a lesson!"
Said his two friends. Kisaki kicked and stepped on my body even more roughly.
"This trash dares to speak up, huh?! Don't you know who you're talking to?! Hah.. Answer me!!"
Kisaki kept kicking my stomach very severely, even causing me to bleed and writhe in pain. His two friends tried to stop him, but he was too caught up in his anger.
"This stupid keychain is worth it!"
I just nodded my head.
"Then pay close attention to this!"
I slowly opened my eyes and saw Kisaki preparing to throw something.
"What would you do?!"
"I'm going to throw this." Kisaki threw the teddy bear keychain towards the window.
I ran to try to catch it, but it was too late, the keychain had fallen off. I saw it fall from the window above and the tears fell without my noticing.
"Hahaha.. Did you cry just because of that?! Disgusting, do you have a backbone?"
I ignored Kisaki's words and continued to look towards the window. I clenched my fists because of my emotions. I wanted to say something, but got cut off.
"Enough Kisaki!"
A loud voice filled our class. Without even looking, I knew who the owner of this voice was, it was Nana.
You stupid girl, what are you doing...
"Wow, I didn't expect that in School there would be a cute girl Like you. Hey, what your name, i want to you be my toy."
Nana didn't respond, as she walked towards me. Despite quickly becoming the center of attention in the classroom, she remained focused on me. Her soft hand touched mine, and with a sweet smile, as if to say 'it's okay', she walked out of the classroom with me.
But of course, Kisaki and his gang were causing trouble.
"Hey! Stupid girl, the boss asked for your name, so say something."
Said the man wearing a mask, he was one of Kisaki's friends, or rather, his lackeys.
"It's okay, a cute girl like this should be taught with her body, right?"
Kisaki walked towards us. His words made my emotions explode, but I wasn't stupid. There was no way I could win in a fight.
*Crash*
"Ayato!"
Nana screamed as I was hit and fell, but Kisaki quickly silenced her with a forceful kiss. Nana pushed Kisaki away, angry.
"Don't touch me! Damn it!"
"Ah.. The more you resist, the cuter you become."
" let go! Dam it!"
Kisaki held Nana's arm, pulling and pressing her against the wall. Kisaki continued to get closer to Nana's face with a disgusting smile.
"No, Stop!"
Nana cried. Tears wouldn't stop flowing. Kisaki laughed more, sniffing Nana's hair. He even licked Nana's cheeks and neck.
Why won't anyone help?
Why are they just whispering and watching without any initiative to help?
Crazy.. They're all crazy..
Right in front of me is a girl who is struggling, but no one wants to help..
Whoever helps her, I will pay anything..
I know I have to do something, but.. My body can't move..
At that moment, a memory of Nana crossed my mind. Her sweet smile, her unpredictable nature, everything about her.
Cih! Not anyone, if I don't move, there won't be any damn change! I will save the girl I love with my own hands.
Without fear, I ran and threw a hard punch at Kisaki.
"Ayato," Nana looked at me with pride.
"Sorry, Nana, it was my mistake—"
*Crash
Before I could finish talking, I felt a very hard punch on my cheek.
This punch was from Kisaki who retaliated against my attack.
It hurt so much that it felt like my bones were broken. My body quickly floated and hit something thin.
Crack!
What is this?
As I opened my eyes, I could clearly see the view of a bright sky.
Oh, so I must have hit the glass. Which means I am falling from the third floor now.
I am definitely going to die.
"Ayato!"
Hah, I could hear Nana's sweet voice for the last time. I am so lucky. I closed my eyes and smiled.
Thank you, Nana.
Ilove you.
Sorry for what I said this morning.
Well, you'll forgive me for sure.
"Ayato!"
Ah, I could hear Nana's scream again. Unconsciously, I smiled broadly. I have no regrets at all. I have managed to protect the girl I love. With this, I can die peacefully.
Goodbye, my beloved Nana.
Goodbye, everyone.
Brak!
I fell and could feel the unpleasant smelling liquid splashing on my head. My whole body was numb. It seems like I am really going to die. Well, it doesn't matter in the end because I managed to save the girl I love.
But, if someone asked me about regrets, I would answer: I still want to experience warm love and I want to have someone called a friend, just once I want someone to accept me.