She stood in the doorway, watching him massage feeling back into his fingers. She knew it was futile, and so did he. No matter how much he massaged them, his fingers would insist on remaining cold and numb, and it did not help to know that the rest of his body was fast joining them.
How brutally unfair, that the Lord of the Medicine Valley, best of healers in the cultivation world, could not heal his own self.
"Caihong, you can come in if you wish".
He was staring out the window at the lovely dusk, but Hands of Light was not surprised in the slightest that he had been aware of her presence the whole time.
She walked in, stopping just a few steps away.
"I have been summoned by XiuzhenWang-jun" she said.
"So go"he replied.
"I don't think I should".
"Why not?".
"You are dying".
As soon as the words were out, she regretted saying them. Because not saying them had somehow made them less of a reality, less likely to happen.
Nobody else in the Medicine Valley or even the cultivation world at large knew this unfortunate secret, that the Lord of the Medicine Valley had been dying slowly for the past few weeks.
"I will die whether you stay or not".
Caihong wished he would not talk about his impending death as if it were someone else's. How could it be possible for the thought of it to grieve her more than it grieved him?
He turned from the window then, a small smile on his face. Caihong nearly did a double take. The Lord of the Medicine Valley rarely ever smiled, not that he ever frowned either. It was just one of the many ways in which he was different from the regular human beings she knew.
For now, she just allowed herself to drink in his smile like water fresh from an oasis. It was small and sad and gentle... but not the sort of smile she wanted to see on that face. Not at all.
She made to speak, but he lifted his hand slowly to her face, and her words fell away as he brushed his frigid knuckles affectionately across her forehead. Caihong's breath hitched as she waited expectantly, hoping for him to cup her face the way he had on the last day of winter, the day they had shared their first -and only- kiss. Instead his hand dropped to her shoulder, and he patted it in a brotherly manner.
"What is our duty, Caihong?".
That was when she knew she had lost the battle. She looked down at his feet, swaddled in woolen socks even though they were indoors, and mumbled her response.
"To preserve life".
"That's right. You must not turn your back on a person who needs you, no matter what".
She wanted to tell him that he needed her, and yet was making her turn her back on him. She wanted to kiss him again, and make him tell her it would all be alright. She wanted to scream and rage at the injustice of it all, to ask him why he couldn't have just ignored that damn request from the Mist Oasis, to strike him for acting so stupidly passive in the face of death.
But she was GuangZhiShou-jun, the Hands of Light, and she did none of these. Rather, she bowed demurely.
"I understand, My Lord".
She was already heading to the door when he spoke again.
"I'm sorry, Caihong".
She paused, her fists clenching, but somehow managed to sound neutral when she asked.
"What for, My Lord?".
"Everything that makes you offended".
Caihong thought she might scream. Could he please stop this already?!! Acting so distant one moment and so familiar the next, making her so hopeful one moment only to leave her feeling like a fool the very next.
Then she felt his arms around her from behind, and her heart began a steady gallop in her chest. When he spoke, his breath brushed right past her ear, filling her nose with the refreshing scent of mint.
"I hate to send you away when all you want is to stay. There is nothing I value more than your happiness, Caihong".
Of course, she knew that. He had bent the most unbendable rules to suit her feelings time without number, just like the day he had allowed her to attend the new year party at the Peony Halls despite her irreplaceable nature.
"But I cannot send another in your place,"he continued"not this time. I know it would be selfish of me to tell you to understand, but please...".
"It's fine,"Caihong cut in, still no match this side of him "I'll go. It would be a perfect opportunity to meet Lanfen Tianshi in person, after all".
She felt his body tense, before he spoke again.
"The poison specialist".
"The Child of the Immortal One,"she countered "and yes, I will be careful. Don't worry".
They remained in that position a moment longer before he pulled away, and Caihong nearly whimpered from the feeling of loss that came with the absence of physical contact with him. It was quite odd,if one thought about it rationally, since his body temperature had dropped to the point where a hug with him supplied no warmth at all.
She turned to face him, running her eyes all over his cherubic features the way she always did whenever she was leaving the Valley.
"Please, don't stop working on the antidote" she said.
Every poison had an antidote; all anyone needed to do was discover it. And if- no, when- they found the antidote for the nameless poison currently ravaging his body,all would finally be well.
"Of course, I won't stop"he reassured her"take care of yourself".
"I will".
They both kept silent, even though there was something Caihong badly wanted to say.
'What are we?', she wanted to ask.
She had arrived at the Medicine Valley as his apprentice, then risen to become his assistant, and finally his partner.
Even then, from the time she turned fourteen at least, there had always been this tension between them, affection and attraction as well. Their chemistry had gotten more and more difficult to ignore, as their feelings for each other blurred the line between colleagues and lovers, although both of them had instinctively refused to acknowledge this development.
But then they had looked into each other's eyes a little too long that winter day, and she had been unable to hold back from kissing him. It had been fireworks and stars and heady heat, an experience she knew they had both enjoyed. Only for him to continue acting normal right after, as if it had never happened.
Naturally, she had found herself playing along. Sometimes though, like today, he would betray his true feelings for a precious short while, before apparently realizing himself and reverting right back immediately.
A tiresome game.
So Caihong had every right to ask that question. It rose past her throat to the tip of her tongue, scalding like a pot of hot water. But like always, for whatever reason, she ended up swallowing it right back. And she left the Medicine Valley without asking it.
*
*
*
All eyes swerved to the door as Caihong walked in, veiled and guarded as usual. Her presence was impossible to ignore, as even the very air in the room seemed irresistibly drawn to her.
She had barely taken a few steps when several servants rushed forward to meet her, executing hasty bows.
"Over here, GuangZhiShou-jun".
She allowed them to lead her to the private bedchamber of the XiuzhenWang-jun, even though no woman except his wife was supposed to step foot in there. Desperate situations called for desperate measures, after all.
The bedchamber was extravagantly furnished, as she had expected. Sparkling gems met her eyes everywhere she looked, and the curtains sported embroideries done so painstakingly in golden lace that she could not help thinking that it was such a waste of time. Ironically,or maybe not, the XiuzhenWang-jun looked so out of place in the midst of all this luxury.
He was lying on the massive bed, surrounded by servants. Caihong watched curiously as they fetched bowl after bowl of water, wiping the blood from his lips even as they urged him in vain to drink this mixture or try that poultice.
"Stand back,"she finally said.
Everybody obeyed promptly. Caihong stepped forward for a better look at her patient. She could not help her amazement at the fact that he was still alive at all. He was paler than snow, and not in a good way. His eyes and cheeks were sunken, and crimson veins bulged all over his body. Worst of all, he was in an unbelievable amount of pain.
"What ails him is internal,"she said"someone bare his chest for me".
This,of course, was not in line with the rules of decorum and whatnot, but now was not the time to bother about that. So in no time at all, his chest was exposed, and Caihong nearly sucked in a breath. Every single rib and bone was totally visible through the thin layer of skin. It looked like the chest of a skeleton cosplaying a living human being.
Caihong could not for the life of her imagine how this man even managed to stay awake.
"Pardon me, XiuzhenWang-jun".
She placed her left palm on his chest, and her hand glowed, enveloping him in a gentle light.
Murmurs and whispers of awe erupted from the spectating servants. It was not everyday that one got to the see the famed Hands of Light in action, after all.
After a few heartbeats, Caihong withdrew her hand, and the glow died.
"Do you want me to give my diagnosis in their presence, XiuzhenWang-jun?"she asked, gesturing to the servants.
Wang Cheng's voice was but a rasp as he spoke.
"Leave".
All the servants left at once, leaving him alone with Caihong and her guard, just one man this time.
"You have fallen prey to diabolic cultivation" she said.
"Of course I know that".
"It's good that you do. It's a most wicked curse, aimed intentionally at your golden core. If your core had merely been poisoned, I could have focused on an antidote, and if it was an injury, I could have healed it easily. But it is most unfortunate that your core itself has been turned into something poisonous".
There was a very loud silence,then...
"What?".
"It is I have said. The very nature of your golden core was altered. What is killing you,is your own golden core".
"Is that even possible?".
"It shouldn't be, but now it is. The only way to save your life is to take the core out and destroy it. Otherwise, you will die a slow, painful death".
Caihong had been trained to maintain a calm disposition at all times, so to Wang Cheng and even her guard, it totally looked like she was indifferently exercising cruelty. Her unseen expression and musical voice were both very even and unclouded by any emotion at all.
"So,if I let you harvest my core, can you transplant another one for me?"he asked.
"I wouldn't advise that. With the nature of the curse, even though such a nearly impossible transplant is to be carried out successfully, the new core will definitely get corrupted as well in a matter of days. There is no way out, XiuzhenWang-jun".
"No way out...".
The man slumped forward, as if his bones had suddenly liquefied. Caihong was about to step forward in concern when he spoke again.
"I guess that's all the good you can ever get out of women".
"Pardon?"she said in surprise.
He looked up at her with a rather insulting expression on his face, and his lips curled into what could only be described as a manic grin.
"You're no use to me. I demand to see the Lord of the Medicine Valley".
"There is no reason why my lord should have to descend from the Valley on your whim"she replied calmly.
What came next shocked her to her marrow. The man actually had the godforsaken audacity to strike her across her face.
"Get lost, bitch".
Caihong stumbled backwards, more out of shock than anything else.
Faster than she could even register any pain, her guard moved, and two sickening cracks brought the servants scurrying in alarm into the room, right in time to see her standing triumphantly over a screaming Wang Cheng with his two arms snapped the wrong way.
GuangZhiShou-jun slapped a black token on the bedside table before announcing in a clear, crisp voice.
"Aurum Pavilion is hereby forbidden from requesting assistance of any kind from the Medicine Valley".
Without another word, she turned and sailed from the room, head held high.