I died on the spring day of three years.
It rained very heavily on the day of the accident, and the red cocoons hung for the new post were wet, and they looked as unlucky as the blood I spit out before I died.
There is no institution, only your Majesty can carry the coffin today.
The emperor who has always been decisive has also made a fool of himself today, and has asked me over and over again, who has long been unable to say flattering words:
"Why, why do we always miss..."
But he knew it.
knew there was only missing between us.
1
I'm the maid of honor.
No, I'm not even a virgin, I just an illegitimate daughter.
My birth mother is the daughter of sin, ought to have struggled all my life in misery and warehousing, but because of the charming and beautiful life, called my righteous father moved his mind and left her in exile.
Can be shrewd like my father, even if the heart moves again, it will not call a woman to ruin the road.
So, my aunt is just an outer chamber.
I don't know if they also had a harmonious love day, but from my memory, every time they met, they were arguing for names.
Once anxious, father angry, "God created man is divided into thirty-six nine! who called you a criminal daughter?"
"This is your life!"
After that, only the mother left to cover her face and cry.
"Life," she murmured, looking at me at the door.
"What fate!" she stared at me, laughing low as if she had made up her mind.
On the day I was six years old, she took poison.
At that time, my father had not yet arrived because he had to take care of his maid, and only I was looking at my mother at a loss.
She was in pain when she died, spat out blood and dirty her new little skirt that she had made for me.
But she took my hand from me, and hated me, saying, "I will not admit it, I will not submit to it; no one will ask me to submit to my life!"
said, she looked up at me, like a torch, as if to engrave my marrow: "you must not admit it! No! I died for you, you are not alone, you must also live out my share!"
"Remember, never, never submit to life!"
"Okay!"
Under my promise not to nod, my mother finally broke her breath with all the unfair complaints about this fate.
And I also used her life in exchange for the opportunity, was taken to the best man's residence by the father.
before entering the door, father suddenly grabbed me, with a slight apology: "Remember what daddy said to you? In the government, you are jade, just with me, just the master relationship. No matter who asks you, no matter if anyone, you must not call me."
said, he sighed, hand over my head: "I don't like you, and your mother. But this is your life, ah, you have to accept life."
Yes, my Lord.
I answered simply, but added some cold look to the courtyard playing smooth jade and jade.
They are all Daddy's daughters, why should I be a slave?
Because it didn't come out of the lady of the room?
I don't admit it! I deny it!
, I want to live better than the housewife!
2
I think that the premise of not submitting to fate is to press the former things in my heart.
So when yu jade used to look at the objects look at me up and down again, before a compassionate appreciation of a "no" word to do my name, I am not dissatisfied.
Instead, I learned to see my master's face at the door of the house next door
Kneel down and squeeze out the laughter that can please the host family should be the name of this brand of disgrace.
It was my father who was uncomfortable.
He said: "Jade Sister, this word is good, from nothing, let her remember the grace of the best friend, but it is too clear that the plain white people saw the joke. It is better to take the "Shan court spring knowledge, the residue of the smoke."
Although it was only a moment, I caught the resentment in Yuya's eyes and the stifling laughter on the Lord's face.
I moved my colour slightly, but I drove my head lower, so that the undercurrent of it stayed between them.
Finally, the mother broke the silence, she softly asked: "husband, I do not know what the word means?"
"Crower, weeds, our jade sister is more delicate than flowers, but a single flower also needs to be set off by green leaves." For her to choose this word, it is not only to thank the prime minister, but also to ask her to recognize her own duties, and to help our jades daughters.
My father was a civil servant, and he said so beautifully.
The mother and Yuya heard the words, and there was more smile on their faces.
Yuya is even more: "It is the daughter who learns shallowness, or the father learns much knowledge." Come on, Yao! Thanks to the father for giving the fame."
She bit the word "Shan" so badly that she seemed to use these two words to run me to my death at her feet until the end of my life.
I looked up at my father.
His color remained unchanged, but the hand he shook into a fist showed tension.
I smiled at him and prodded my head deeply:
Thanks to the master's efforts to make a name for such a small person as a slave.The slave will surely serve the good lady, so as to report the grace of the best friend.
I don't sound very loud, but for every word I drop, I gain a point on my spine.
At the end of the day, I just felt like it was going to pressure me to hold my head up.
I die staring at Yuya embroidered dress, hands raised green veins.
Do weeds really compare with flowers?
Can you really compare?
can also be rooted in the soil to grow, and why can't it be compared?
I looked up, and beneath my obedient countenance was endless firmness.
Yes, I believe I can compare!
Since this jade jade learning poetry, I listened to the words, I do not understand the words when she went out to buy the teahouse to ask Mr.; jade to practice chess painting, I will secretly draw, privately take the moon's example of silver to buy ink and ink instruments, while idle over and over again; I will be in the heart of jade, over again and over the night.
Day after day, year after year.
and I served with graceful charm.
She thought it would be of no use to me to learn these things, and that they would be used by expensive people. I might as well take a break and buy some cakes and sweet mouths.
I have no words, she doesn't understand.
Weed, indeed, refers to the overgrown weed, but more to the lush grass.
As long as the weed grows strongly, the momentum is good enough, and it can -
Cover the beautiful fragrant flowers!
3
It is a labor, and such a day will pass faster than at my mother's.
It was the New Year.
The Lord Mother made a new dress for the servants in the palace for the celebration.
I also got a red dress.
I used to have a lot of clothes, red, pink, pale powder ... full cabinet full of color.
But only without my mother's most desirable red.
I remember when she touched my head, the expression is infinite loneliness, but in the tone of: "my son, quickly grow up, when the time to ask your father to find you the door to the top of the desk to marry, and let the mother touch the red material again, look at the fire of the wedding dress."
I have not seen the red.
But I think, but a red dress, I have so many good-looking skirts with her, and the red may not have these good looks.
But then, I knew.
Some things are the duties and attachments that people in the ditch like us do not dare to exceed for a lifetime.
So, when I carefully cared for the red herring, the light was completely taken away by this dazzling color.
Indeed, beautiful.
The emerald touches me and asks, "Ash!"
I looked up, only felt that the fireworks are far less than this mule on my body.
"What is it?"
"Do you have a wish, quick! my mother said, the new year wishes the most spiritual!"
I have never believed in any strange power, I only recognized the victory of the heavens, but still made a wish in the flourishing non-reliance:
wishes to -
Not under my mother's trust, live better than every plastic family.
Two wishes -
After a thousand sails are over, I can wear red clothes honestly every year.
Three wishes -
My future husband can accompany me with my knowledge.
4
This is how I spent six years in the Rong family, and I have survived to Yuya and Yu.
Her and the feast were very grand, but with it came the news of the emperor's draft.
This was originally the most eager hope of the officials' house, but it has become a scourge in the ears of the family who has already been very popular.
After all, the former dynasty is closely related to the imperial palace, and the rear palace has always been a place of wrong. My father is a pure subject, he did not use his daughter's pillow to add bricks to his career, but did not want to take the risk of the back palace competition.
Moreover, the Emperor was already a man half cut off into the ground.
Really, unworthy!
But unfortunately, the emperor's fate is difficult to do, and Yuya has not been engaged, in addition to hanging the hair to be a brother, there is only one way to go into the palace.
"My Jade Sister!" the mother first mourned.
Immediately followed by my father's helpless sigh and the cry of Yunya Pearl.
But relative to their sadness, I only have to pinch my own arm without laughing.
I know my chance to turn over!
Though I am a daughter, I have been a slave for many years.
But he also knew that there was no kingdom under the heavens, nor a kingdom near the earth.
The high and low in this world can't play with me, but the imperial power is different, it is thunder and rain, it can make people show the difference between clouds and mud in an instant, and it can help me to straighten up 90,000 miles!
Therefore, I don't care if the emperor is old, nor do I care about the wind and snow in my mother and Yuya's mouth.
Love is good.
If not, it is not harmful.
I only want the power, can call me no longer for the power of fish! Can call me the power to change my life!
On the eve of entering the palace, I went to worship my aunt.
I burned a lot of paper money for her, after all, I could not come for a long time.
It may be...
I was dark, but then I was lit by the fireworks in front of me.
I touched her gravestone, depicting her name a little bit, and my eyes became firm.
I said -
"Mama, wait for me to come back."
"By the time I see you, I'll be alive too"
5
should say not to say, Yuya is not ashamed for everyone's daughter.
Although he had resentment, he still resisted the nature to coax the old emperor to obey the post.
However, in a few months, the princess rose to be a princess, and there was no difference in the time.
She still sighs in her free time.
I and the emerald know that she is sighing her husband why not the scenery of that scenery.
For Jingqing, I only know that he is his Majesty's eleventh brother, and he is now his royal Highness.
is more graceful before the palace... lover.
As far as looks and character are concerned, I hear it more from the flourishing mouth.
After all, as long as there was a banquet for the princes and noblemen, Yuya never allowed me to serve around, just as now, whenever the old emperor came, she sent me out early.
Her saying about this is that the emerald is to urinate to serve her, she with more heart.
But she and I both knew that she was merely wary, that if my ambitions had been evident in the early days, my face with her three or four points would have led to speculation.
Every time the scenery is mentioned, the bright eyes are full of light, and it is almost a pious praise: "It is really a god!"
And I stared at yuya's shameful cheek a little more puzzled.
I don't understand, will the gods of heaven really like the people who are humble as dust in the world?
Until, I met myself.
At that time, the emerald was pushed into the water because the jade had blocked the evil of the princess for the first two days.
people are hot and scared, don't say get out of bed, people burn too much to say some nonsense, thank God.
Yuya no longer said, finally arranged me in front of the old emperor.
But in the end, I underestimated the emperor who could kill a bloody road from the dispute of power.
Though he was old, he was not as lecherous as the Emperor in the Wordbook.
On the contrary, he is a shrewd man.
He saw my intention.
Between his eyes, my ambition was uncovered in his cloudy eyes.
He liked the jealousy of the princess because of him, but could not get into the struggle between them.
So when his eyes wandered between me and Yuya, there was some certainty and clarity in his eyes.
With the end of his eye he lifted up, and his sight was fixed on me because I saw the beads on his purpose.
The emperor smiled and touched the jade hand: "I don't remember this bead flower only rewarded you last month, how, so soon it was tired?"
Yu's eyebrow: "What is your Majesty's word?If his Majesty has given his subjects such a treasure, how can he give it to others?"
The Emperor uttered a meaningful "Oh," and with four words rejected my whole nine-year effort.
"Otherwise, the East followed the example"
No wonder this flower looks a little rough.
After that, although the two still eat wine and dinner as usual, talking and laughing, I felt like two knives broke my spine a little bit.
I know that even if I am reluctant, I should also give the answers that the superiors want.
"It is the slaves who have crossed the eyes of the masters, saying that I will simply pull the beads down and hold them in my hand."
The sharp corners are bloody on my hands, but they are not worth the defeat and disappointment of one thousandth of my heart.
I am a defeated man, after all.
The emperor was quiet and said faintly, "knowing the mistake is good, you don't have to wait in the hall."
I walked out of the palace like a mourner, and lost my soul wandered in this huge palace.
Tears finally fell unceasingly.
Just when I was planning to cry quickly and painfully in spite of the face, a sound like the clear air and the moon fell on my ear: "who is the little palace lady crying?"
"Such pear blossoms bring rain, really I see jealous ah"
I look up, but I see the scenery that has captivated my life.
6
people snow dressed in ink, eyebrows, raising their hands between the feet have their own flow.
And it shall be like unto the gods that fell into the earth.
My eyes were faint, but I took a few quick steps back when he came to me.
"Noble stop!"
He ignored it and still went forward.
I have some panic, in the palace to let others see with the outside men private meeting, I am afraid that they live too long in Yuya hands!
"Noble people! Noble people are out of line, I don't know which adults are in the house, for the Yao people should also worry about one or two!"
As soon as he said this, his step finally stopped.
He stared at me, his lips were faint, with some playful taste: "The point of the tooth is sharp, the king will ask which palace female are you?"
This king?
I subconsciously fell to my knees and uttered the word of forgiveness.
could not help looking up at him.
Such a year old, such a style of body, I am afraid that this is the divine figure in the jade mouth!
Indeed, it is a sight for a thousand years.
In this way, I can't blame jade for not forgetting.
Just this face can make people dream!
He lifted me up gently, and when he looked at my face, he sighed, "Look, you're scared, the king didn't say anything."
He sighed, "If it is the king who scares you, then the king will say it first."
This king is the 11th brother of the holy one today, and the king is clear.
"The City"
"Hmm?"
As near as the color of his burning peach blossoms, my face is a little burnt, and my partial heart repeats, "Apeen."
"Fanghua House to your wife's office"
His pigtail turns slightly, exploring a flash in the pigtail.
"Well, I know," I heard him wipe the tears from my eyes softly, "no crying, so good, there is nothing in this world worth calling you to cry and hurt your face."
said, he easily drew out the beads in my hand, and put them on it for me.
He took a step back, laughing:
"This flower is perfect for you"
Also, just for you.
I only felt that my heart was touched by something, it was such a simple three words and two words, but it is the only person I live to this day who said this to me.
is not an imitation of the East, but unique.
I thanked him.
Though it is a rotten saying in the days of my heart, it is true.
Looking at his departing back, I touched his face.
There are no tears.
only laughs.
But just as I was sinking in this dream, one hand ripped my hair dead.
7
I was struck by a smash.
Her strength was very different from her like the willow wind, and in an instant my face became red and swollen.
She can't keep smiling, and she's staring at me shockingly:
"The happy child beside the princess said, "It is you, who led me to Yuqingchi, and conspired with her to kill me. Is it not?"
I had already torn my face with her and simply admitted it directly.
The moment when the voice fell, it was another slap.
I fell all beads.
I don't like pain, but I want that bead, which is the only person who has given me warmth for so many years.
I have to keep it!
Yuya looked at my attention on the beads, and ran over the past with one foot:
"Are you planning on climbing?"
"The palace knows that you are an unripe wolf cub! For so many years, the palace and my mother have opened one eye and turned a blind eye to you, allowing you to rise to today, it is our heart that is soft and useless!"
"Today you dare to blame to the emperor, the palace can not tolerate you!"
said, she waved to let the little boy wrapped in the white on my neck.
"Is this the death of the slave?" even his Majesty is forgiving the slave, and she is not afraid to be harsh to the reputation of the palace people.
, gossip, this palace is not afraid! Besides, the base slave betrayed the Lord, the palace punishment should be divided into two parts.
Just when I was about to suffocate, the neck was loose and the jade laughter came from my ear:
"You really can say something, I'm afraid it's not like your outer sister?"
I gasped in disbelief.
She does know!
Also, seeing the autumn as the mother, what can be hidden from her?
"Then the mother knew who the slave was, so why did she want to set it free?"
Yuya hummed and waved to send the scattered palace people:
"My palace does not dare to kill you, father said before he entered the palace, let this palace treat you well." This palace is also like this, but you, uncomfortable."
This palace knows why you are climbing up. But this palace has let you go, but it is not just because of my father's advice.
"Why is that?" I frown, only to see a bit of mother's shadow on her.
"Because, this palace and you are sisters. Even if it is not an aunt, we are still sisters of the blood. Everything in the world can change, only this bone and blood can not remove the blood."
"Ash, there are some words that the palace would like to say to you. If you can't find the opportunity, let's make it clear today. The palace admits that you came to the Palace with a heart, but this palace also wants to understand for so many years. We are close sisters.
"Instead of counting against each other"
"If you can take off your guard, this palace will surely find you a good family for you. On the day of your marriage, you will be recognized as a righteous sister, so that you will return to your surname."
She looked at me and wavered, and seized my hand: "Ayan, you can't be a person for yourself. Family stability is your and my own."
I look at her sincere countenance, and hold it back: "Then, thank you, Sister Pity."
She's right, people really can't be just for themselves.
And I shouldn't be stuck in this either.
After all, standing higher than the family, not only can rely on their own people this road.
8
But before my sister could find someone for me, I married out first.
That was the third year of my entrance into the palace, and the private feelings of my sister and the king were stabbed out because of a small image.
Looking at the angry emperor, I think I should gamble.
I went up.
When I knelt in the hall, my head was blank, and only the two tremors showed my panic.
The emperor repeatedly compared with the small statuette, with an inquiry: "Aun, is it really you?"
I dared not look into the eyes of the emperor, and could only bend my knees with all the humble bows of a slave, and give him a deep look.
"I dare not deceive the holy one"
In a silence, the emperor laughed two times, although it was hearty, but I heard some compromise.
That is a misunderstanding. You are a girl, you are not a big person, but your mind is not small. If so, then it will be the beauty of adulthood, and give you the wedding to the king.
When I bowed my head to Shane, I saw the eyes of various people, but the most striking thing was the scenery.
He was standing in the crowd, and the full hall was covered with fine clothes but the scenery of his scenery was over the moon.
He smiled softly, and looking at my face was an emotion I did not understand.
is not full of affection when looking at the elder sister, it is like...
The unconventional man has at last seen something that will interest him.
On the third day of March 32, I married into the royal residence as the righteous sister of the king's princess.
I think I finally won my sister.
After all, this is the good person she has thought of all her life.
Even though he only has her in his heart.
But I believe that the coming day is long.
There will always be good days for me.
I will also live a life that does not belong to the outer room girl.
In this way, at the age of seventeen, I was given to be a wing princess when I served the emperor and your princess.
But at the age of twenty-four, my husband became king, and I...
is also the little wing woman in the king's residence.
9
The world laughs at me, I can't afford this splash of wealth, but only I know that in the countless days and nights when he ascended to the throne, I will be scared at night by the scene of the palace change.
That day, the fireworks were soaring, the pavilion collapsed, the royal palace court was bleeding into a river, and the scream was heard.
I scrambled into the palace, fearing the rebels to find the scenery.
But when I stepped into Fanghua Hall, I saw my sister hanged on the beam.
Those beautiful eyes are wide open, unbelievable.
And my husband stood aside, hanging my elder sister in his hand before he could loosen it.
"The Master ..."
Hearing the sound, he looked at me, if the moon's face was covered with blood, it was as if a god fell into the earth and became a hell.
He smiled, raising his hand like the day he tried to save my scattered hair.
I subconsciously retreated, and without two steps, I was tripped over by Xiao Anzi's body and fell to the ground.
"Today's collar change is... you?"
"It is I, arn, I have been dormant for many years, just for this day. Including your aunt, I do not like her, from the beginning, only to see her family life. Later, with her, but also intend to confuse the royal blood if it can not be done.
I only felt that the sky collapsed, and I could understand every word he said.
doesn't seem to understand.
Is this really my husband?
"Ash, don't be afraid," he touched my face with blood, dirty my makeup, it seems to take me fall, "I am to your elder sister, but with you, it is real. I am step by step watching you climb up, you are my own hands, no one will be more than I love you, and there will be no one more worthy of my love than you."
"I will let you be my queen, and share my world, argon."
His words are so full of temptation, but I look at the dead bodies all over the earth, but my heart is cooler than the three feet of cold.
For so many years, what I have insisted on and pursued is nothing more than the sun and the shadow under his power, playing in the field!
How ridiculous and how scary!
So when the decree came to me, I just knelt.
Kneels with a low brow like a slave.
10
"Why?" the inquiry of Jingqing followed the moment when I withdrew the post-sealing decree.
His voice was as plain as ever, but the anger in the faint eyes could not be hidden.
is also, he is already the emperor of the ninety-five, and he does not have to be patient as before.
Seeing his shivering eyebrows, I pressed the fingertips of the hair hemp and turned calmly to hold the scenery and softly consoled.
I this kind of motherly voice, fell in the eyes of outsiders may really think that I am a good mother.
But unfortunately, Jingrong is not my son, it is the first emperor of the king, who was born.
is also ... the son of the scenery!
My dark eyes are staring at the scenery, and there is no longer envy and jealousy in my eyes:
Nothing, just want to live.
The face of the scenery was suddenly cold: "Ash, are you blaming me?"
I opened my lips and felt powerless.
Thousands of words are knotted in my breast, and half, I knelt on the ground like the birds whose wings were folded:
Don't dare...
But my attitude, which is low to the dust, does not know why it annoys the scenery.
He took hold of my jaw and it hurt so badly that I thought he was going to break it up, but his manner was so kind, and the other hand carefully put the hair I fell on.
"Ash, I like you, I love you"
"I want to be with you"
"Can you please not be disappointed?"
I was as freakish as he was, and when he said the most womanly thing in the world, my satirical smile deepened.
These years of marriage, I loved him, never disobeyed him.
But even today I have the courage to hath.
I looked up at him, and with the hatred of vengeance came the words: "Then your Majesty said this to my elder sister?"
The force in his hand was relaxed, but I laughed even more.
Yes, my elder sister, the one with his ears.
was even forced to be buried by him.
Jingqing's face has always been very good, especially the double wave of peach flower is added to his flow of ink and heavy color.
But this once carried a bay of spring water with a thousand kinds of tenderness, called a thousand women, and even my elder sister like decent people have lost their minds, regardless of the reckless, now, there is only cold and ruthless.
And always know best to see the master eyebrow height, but leaned this do not know when the head will fall, then look at him.
Long time, he took the lead in breaking the silence:
"I know, Alan"
You don't blame me.
"You ..." he stared at me, unconsciously, taking a deep breath, as if he were acknowledging something he had to accept.
Then with some sadness he said, "You hate me!"
If it weren't for fear that would scare Jingrong, I might really laugh.
hated him?
Of course I should hate him!
He calls my family ruined! He makes all my sufferings come to be a joke!
I feared him more than I hated him.
For days and nights when he was queen, I slept at night.
I am afraid of closing my eyes, that is, the shocking scene of my sister being hanged in Fanghua Hall, is the blood of my relatives slaughtered into a river.
perceived my contraction, the scenery clear hand a tight, the body also fell down, my lower jaw with it.
Hate is useless.
His tone seems to make people submerged in the three feet of cold, can not see half of hope.
There is only endless cold and despair.
"Ash, you're the one who pissed me off first"
"Righteous wealth is your own request, now everything, but also to your own subject!"
said, he hurled me to the bed, and then left the house with a crying scenery.
"Rhoney -"
"think well," zhumen's shadow and brilliant sunshine intertwined in his face, strange to call me vaguely, "if you want to see ron-er, do not continue to fight against it!"
Tears fell on the bed, but the hand that was tightened with resentment was loosened.
I laughed sadly.
Yes, I asked for everything...
A sparrow is a sparrow, and can never bear the cost of being a phoenix.
For ever and ever!
11
I have compromised.
If there is anything in this world worthy of my care and giving, it is a glory.
He is my only relative, and he is the only blood in my family.
is so that I will not be alone in this world.
My defeated day has come at a glance.
Can Jingrong is not the same, he is still small, the big day is still behind.
So even if I don't want to look forward, but for him, I am willing to go to hell.
Moreover, after all...
I have a bitter laugh on my lips.
Is it not that the shell of Arun was left to him, to this deep palace that eats men?
What's the big deal!
The moment the door was opened, the thin light was like broken gold on my body.
never fell into my eyes.
I know that my sky won't light up any more.
The view is not far away.
I don't know whether it is deliberate, but his costume is quite the same as when I first saw him.
is only the dragon pattern hovering in his chest, showing his identity as the 95th, and always reminding me that the scenery is no longer the young man who called me shocked.
He called softly, stretching out his hand white enough to reflect the sunlight.
It happened that the breeze passed and blew his clothes flying.
To the light, he is like a man of heaven.
"Where's Ron?" and I laid my hand on his palm without the slightest movement.
Jingqing was satisfied with my good manners, and he smiled in the corner of his mouth: "In the Fanghua Hall, wait for you to see him when I return to the palace."
After that, Jing Qing microton, then added a sentence: "He misses you, I, too."
"Thank you, your Majesty, for saying that I turned my head and carefully looked at the yard where I had lived for three years."
After that, such a good sun is afraid that it will never be seen again.
Before I entered the palace, as I had done five years before I went to my mother's grave.
I have a lot to say to her.
It's like, nothing.
I burned a lot of paper, more than this year, the next year, this life I should give my mother burned all clean.
I think, I'm afraid, this time, it is farewell.
Today is the day that I have done all my duties in this life.
From then on, all I cared about was Rory.
12
"Aunt Ron, I miss you!"
I just stepped into the fragrance hall, and the rear hand was almost knocked back by the scenery.
I steadied my step and took a closer look at him.
did not know a few rounds before the separation, want to come to clear the heart still have his son.
I looked at the same scenery as the glutinous rice ball, and finally hung a smile on my face.
Children are good, they have no sorrows, they can eat and sleep.
Don't have to think about the cruelty and blood.
My aunt also wanted my son.
" Really?" , originally still thriving scenery, the corner of the eyes of the tears, "I thought, aunt also left Roe son."
said that he came forward to hold me, and the small body could feel his trembling from the cloth: "Aunt don't go, it's only my aunt."
"Rong-er will be good, will not say the words to find the mother-in-law"
"Aunt, don't leave Rory alone"
I try not to leave the fragile to the children, but still see their own shadow in the scenery.
In this world, there is another child who is forced to grow up.
Tears, falling silently.
I hold him more forcefully: "Ring Er does not cry, Ring Er is so good, how can aunt leave Ring er alone?"Aunt still have to watch Ring Daughter grow up, build achievements, and then marry a sister and live a beautiful life with your own joy.
I glanced at the scenery by the zhu gate and swore: "for the honor of the son, aunt to do anything is worth it."
"This time my aunt made a mistake, your Majesty punished it, later, it will not be."
"Aunt will always be with Rory"
I did make a mistake.
I did not live according to his mind.
But for the sake of Honor, I am willing to turn myself into a puppet with no will.
For him, and for the world to see and play.
I obediently accepted the Queen's throne and put on the red dress I've always dreamed of.
I don't know how many times more gorgeous than the time of the dress, I actually felt that it is not as quiet as a plain.
Just like, I finally achieved the wish of the year, became a decent wife of others, and also sat in the back seat of calling all the women in the world, standing higher than the 18th ancestors of the Hong family.
However, I think, it is better to do that small hammer in the home to be like a person.
Am I being too greedy?
He got what he didn't deserve, so he was scared and saw everything change.
Still because everything is just seeming. In fact, it is a mirror flower.
the third month after the wedding, previously with me married into the king's palace to do the side of the parliamentary daughter jishi string, now noble princess, carrying a box of cake to pay me a visit.
And I watched the pastry dish being pushed in front of scenery.
, like a great enemy.
13
"What, afraid of poisoning?"
Chiang Sing red lip, revealing a provocative laugh.
"The princess herself did it, naturally it is a good one" I have long since lost the mood to argue with her, but still call Argon to take the silver needle to test poison.
Seeing, Jiangsstring laughed.
She picked up a piece of it and put it in the mouth, chewed it carefully, and then picked up the tea she had made and drank it.
I watched her swallow, and looked at the silver needle that had not changed in her hand, and finally nodded and called for Jingrong to use it.
Yubin Jiao's string tone is pure despair after seeing through everything.
"You said, your master is dead, how can you still be alive?"
Why don't you die?
Her words were so vicious that even her granddaughter urged her to be cautious. But I, like a queen, did not care about her, nor did I care.
After all, my heart was already dead.
I just meticulously wipe the snack scum of the corner of the mouth for Jingrong, faintly: "I don't worry about your wife, I will break off."
"Caring?" Chiang Si's string intonation, the bright red Dan pointed directly to Jingrong, "Are you talking about this evil seed?"
"Be careful!"
She ignored my rebuke and murmured, "because if he dies, you will die! But if you die, he will be sad... but he should have thought of all this..."
"A noble princess! It is a great crime to destroy the emperor," I stared at her dark ink, and the uncertain light, if the touching hands that lurk beneath the abyss, were ready to drag me under the clouds every moment.
"Crowning and destroying the family?" Chiang Sistring twisted these words in his mouth, and a hint of sadness flashed on his face.
turned, and she became fierce again.
"Long Yulin, you are a foolish born son of the day, you have spent so many years in the palace, but you can still say that you have not known the words of the dragon, but there is the skill of the Chiang family, but it is necessary to kill one kind of evil, and your Majesty can also punish Zhang's family for this!"Furst, "It is surely that I must be so harm," who said that there are so many people in this palace.
"Sing Chiang"
I know she is pushing, but I have no room to fight back.
I have to endure, and I can only endure.
I had thought that in this life I would not bow to anyone in good faith, but in this room, facing the different look and eyes of everyone, I knelt and fell at the feet of the Chiss string.
Please, leave the children alone.
"He will not stand in your way, he will not do anything to miss, he should not be involved. If you want to be queen, stay in the scenery, and have the ability to protect yourself..."
Before I had finished, a heavy slap fell on my face.
Chiss string raised his hand, look at my eyes look at a funny thing: "I want, only he can give, you can not rare! more need! You say, he should not be involved. Why do you think I called him a seed? I know that he is the child of the little bitch and the man! Such a child is born to die!"
, she pinched my chin: "I will not make you happy, I have a pain, you will be painful ten!"
The moment the voice fell, behind it came the painful struggle of the scenery.
The warehouse king turned back, he was already green, struggling to fall to the ground.
"Rong-er!" I looked at the cold-smiling Chiang-Sling, and it was clear that she had eaten a snack.
She saw the inquiry in my eyes and took the snack with great compassion: "The snack was indeed poisoned, and the only antidote I used after eating the snack."
"The silver needle is not..."
"You forgot who gave it to you?"
I opened my mouth and the feeling of powerlessness took hold of my throat.
is the view.
14
I didn't hear anything more from Chisling, so I went out with the scenery in my arms.
It is strange that my arms are tired of holding him, but I feel that this reliance in my arms is such a vanity.
The moment I touched the door, the last glimmer of light in my eyes was gone the palace door was locked from the outside.
But I still do not give up, crazy flapping the palace gate, trying to make this cold Forbidden City produce a trace of goodwill.
I don't know how long I shot it, blood on Zhumen layer after layer, and did it again and again.
Until Jingrong died in my arms, and the door was opened at this time.
Hunter, come to reap the fruits.
My eyes are red, a word leaked from the quivering teeth: "You just can't tolerate him? he is your own flesh!"
The scenery is not moved, and even the hammer has not risen.
He leaned over and closed his glorious eyes.
"Ash, I will not tolerate him!If I do not ascend to the throne, he will be my greatest support, but now the world is me, as long as he is alive, will let others know that he is in order to confuse the royal blood and jade, I can not let the world, call the world to know this disgraceful past, to poke my spine!"
"Clear scenery!"The tears blurred my eyes, but they could not erase the despair in my heart.
My pillow man, I never seem to see clearly.
It was all his own hands, but he had to take a child to fill the end!
My head fell slowly, and I no longer looked at him.
"Kingqing," I arranged my shirt for Jingrong, "I thought that if you were cold, you would also miss your flesh and blood."
"If it doesn't work, think of me ..."
Now it seems that it is I who think too high of myself.
I looked up, looking at the clear scenery of the dress, and my eyes were dead.
I'm really sad this time.
"It was you who broke my life."
After that, I removed the top of my head and thrust it straight into my neck.
I think it's okay to die.
died, and it was all over.
Unfortunately, people like me are not worthy of any success.
The scenery took one hand from me, and the other hand knocked me unconscious.
Before he died, I heard him whisper:
"Ash, don't think of leaving me; we will be together forever and ever."
15
When you wake up, the view is clear.
Always beautiful, his eyes are deep at the moment, and his face is full of embarrassment.
looks like a good husband who worries about his wife.
I turned away from seeing him, and said, "Your Majesty can't keep me any longer, why delay this moment?"
He touched my face, half gently and half compulsively intertwined me with his sight.
"How do you know that this moment of delay will not leave you?"
Speaking, he added some warmth in the ice-like curtain, and his thin lips moved slightly: "Ash, you are happy!"
His hand was covered in my belly, and he said, "you will not love scenery more than your own children? He has not yet seen this great mountain, but he will be strangled because of his unrelated private enmity." Ah, are you really willing to do this?"
I was silenced.
Countless children who had been looking forward to day and night arrived at an untimely moment.
But I have to admit that even though I just found out about this kid, even though he had the blood of the scenery, I loved him.
Loved, willing to continue to live on in this world that has no hope.
However...
I look at the clear eyes through determined.
This time, I don't just live for the kids.
Choose one for yourself!
16
Jingqing asked me to personally watch Chisstring die.
He was always self-righteous and thought that this would make up for me.
But it's just a reminder that all of us are nothing else in his hands, coming and going.
At this moment, looking at the front of the jewels full of head, the dress is shining, still shining brightly, I made people pass the poisonous wine.
She didn't hesitate, and drank.
"I really didn't expect to see you as a bitch in the end"
She squeezed the wine stains from her lips, and her fingers moved slightly, bringing up a crackling sound.
The voice is moving, but also the voice is sad.
"Young Yubin, I hate you to death!What on earth?"It is clear that Yuya has entered the palace, and it is me who should accompany him!
"Why are you here, and why are you taking my last thought away?"
In her eyes there is a shattered light floating, but the eyelids are still carrying the thrust of the proud.
was afraid that I would pity her, and added, "but do not be proud of him! He does not love anyone! His heart is colder than that three feet cold! Even if you are alive, you are only being tortured for nothing!"
"I know," I looked at the blood stains on her fingers and whispered, "so I never expect, no expectation, no resentment, no hatred."
"Is it fun to lie to yourself?" and Chisling easily broke the lie that covered my wounds.
I hurriedly avoided her eyes, but she just talked to herself.
The music is slow, with some young gentleness.
"I was six years old that year, my aunt took me to the palace. Yulin, you know? So many prince prince princess, he like rubble hidden beads like let me look forever."
"I was trying to be his wife at that time, even if I knew that he was hiding in his heart, I could only commit myself to being his daughter, and I was happy, I think at least I was with him."
But he has never seen me... and fortunately, he doesn't love anybody.
The black blood stained her dress, and the waves in her hands became more and more unconventional and intonable.
The end of her eyes are red, with incomprehension and resentment, whispering: "I met you first!"
"I love you the most, why don't you give me love!"
Why don't you love me?
This sentence seems to have exhausted all her strength, and she fell to the ground with everyone.
"Young Yubin!" she grabbed my hand, "I am willing to die, I am also willing to enter the bureau. I know that the Chiang family's position today, I have already called him a taboo, but he called him to eliminate the disease by dirty means, let me leave the wrong place to him, so that he is still the pure and white he..."
He is the one I love.
Let's finish...I'm really tired...
I took her handkerchief, faded her armor, and played this song for her.
I'm really good at it.
Can not be jade, so the jade can not be.
On her double jerk of unwillingness and grief, I got up and said softly: "take off her royal dress, drag it to the funeral to feed the dog."
Chisling is very sad, but I can't leave the goodness to her.
She went with them, took away my last bright moment, I will not be gentle.
Isn't she the face of the world?
That made her an object of laughter and pity to the world.
pushing the door, a strange and familiar but I hate to stand in the door.
The scenery is waiting for me with full-eyed emerald flowing.
He opened his lips, and at the end of a thousand words was only one sentence:
"Anin, let's start over."
I put on my shirt: "My daughter-in-law has been here, accompanying your Majesty."
I don't see the sadness in his eyes, but I often hear his self-talk in the days after the abortion.
Whenever the night is quiet, he caresses me who thinks he is asleep.
"Is it okay to live?"
"I was small and cautious, I did not dare to love, I could not love; now I have the power to love you, but you will not wait for me."
"Ash, have pity on me?"
"Ash..."
I took my hand from his palm and looked at his sleeping face and shook my head.
"Your difficulties are never the reason you use them to hurt me"
I'm really sad.
"I can't wait for you any longer..."
"Since you have left me, then do not blame me for the tooth, the eye for the eye!"
"You have destroyed all my possessions, then I will block this life so that you will be sad once!"
This is my choice.
I am not a princess who can overthrow the evil state of the dynasty, but this is a bitch who carries countless trusts and responsibilities.
But this fate is the ninety-five most cherished thing.
In that case, I was ruined.
Let him taste the sadness!
17
Thus the days passed three months peacefully.
The palace is called calm and quiet, but I have already seen the undercurrent from the gossip of the palace people.
Also, the dynasty changed, and the rulers changed.The Chiang family fell down, and there were many officials who had the mind to fight.
But the new emperor, even the three kings, at this moment in his eyes with those sesame officials no different.
In order to ascend to a high position on this road to the throne, one must have the support of a queen of the family.
And my existence, my children, is in their eyes.
But for these, I am all in mind.
I'm waiting for an opportunity.
Waiting for an opportunity that will free me.
Therefore, when the queen of the rear has a decency and solemnity, and puts a face for the country and the people to speak to me about its interests, I am not bothered to think of the snake with her:
"How does the mother want the subject?"
Her eyes are full of light, she can't bear it: "your life is already told to me." The lamenting family pity you, but, can not tolerate you. "
"there is no more family in this world," she waved, "this is a soup sent by the master of the Ming Yi county of Wingchang State House. It has a taste, which is excellent. As long as it is taken before production, it will liberate everyone."
I decapitate.
yongchang government high gate noble, the county's father and brother hold military power, is indeed their mother and son should be the object of recruitment.
is also the upper choice that can openly liberate me.
I hold the bowl, smile faintly: "or the queen mother can see through, the subject's heart is happy and sincere, only one thing is still worrying about. This child is from my humble body, but in the end, your grandson asks the Empress of the Queen to pray for his peace and obedience."
"It will be"
"As long as the child does not have a surname"
I cleared my breath, took the soup and drank it, then fell to the queen, and was satisfied with it: "This is also what the subject's daughter-in-law thought, the subject, thank you for the mother's completion."
"Ash!" she and I are several years of spring, I saw her eyes hidden light floating.
Do not complain about the family, the family is not easy to go to today, the tears of suffering are not less than you.
Don't blame him either.
"He was really in love with you. Just, just..."
The hidden palace gate took the empress full of regretful sighs.
I laughed bitterly and stretched my hand, trying to touch the light that came through the door.
Just what?
Just, we were wrong from the start.
How can two heavy people stay for each other?
So, we just keep missing out.
18
On the day of my birth, the clouds turned over and the mountains rained, and the wind filled the buildings.
When the beans fell on the ground, and the whole ground was paved, my scream also echoed in the palace.
A basin of blood was brought out, in sharp contrast to my pale face.
The eyes have long been blurred by sweat, but the pain of tearing calls me awake.
I don't know how long, a cry sounded.
I also lost my strength and was stuck in my bed like mud.
Under the body, the blood color is already intertwined.
"Mama, is a little prince," Grandma's tears fell non-stop, grass a package of children, put it on my side.
I raised my hand and trembled to touch the child who still could not recognize the eyebrow: "It is a boy!"
"Hello, boy! Don't be trapped in one part of heaven and earth, you can win glory with your double fist. You don't have to be attached to people, and you will be stuck with them all your life."
"don't blame a mother for sending you away, so that you lose this heavenly wealth, but this high place is not cold, a mother can not protect you, your father is not a person who can be moved by the affection of the bones and flesh." A mother is already looking at the head, that is, trapped in this imperial city.
"But you are still small, as long as you are not here, heaven and earth will always have a more happy way."
"Amother, I only wish you will be free in this life."
This is also the last thing I can do for you.
said that the infants on the side seemed to sense it, and cried louder.
side by side of the party members afraid of dragging down the trouble, and hurriedly before the stillbirth handed over, hands will take away the child.
Grandma put her hand on her, crying, "Mama, give the child a name."
I stared at the blood soaked bed and rubbed my lip:
Let it be, the look of hope.
, too, forgot to forget.
"Bring girl, go, it is really too late to go!"
Grandmother snatched the child, and held three heads with me: "Sir, your Majesty, for me to know the grace, betray you to kill the scenery of honor, it is once again, the slave will do. Just because, this is the mule as a servant loyalty. But you treat me as a slave, we know that this life can not be rewarded."
I smiled, "I know, so it's never your fault"
"Afterwards, please."
"If in the future he asks what kind of person his aunt is, you will tell him that she is a useless person, but she really ... loves him very much!"
I watched the child get farther and farther away from me, and finally did not fall, and the tears of helplessness slipped from the corner of my eyes.
There began to be frightened cries around, and from time to time there was a sound of breaking the door.
Everybody, just nobody I want to see.
Jingqing took hold of my hand and told me not to sleep.
I won't listen to him!
I am tired of people in this life, it is easy to choose once for myself and live for myself once.
Me, go see the people you want to see.
19
I don't know how long I slept, I just remember having a long, long dream.
In my dream, I saw everyone I saw in this life.
Father, Sister, Mother, Yuya, the Old Emperor... and even Chisling.
I think this is the way to see people before they die.
Why not my mother?
Is it the disgust that I have fallen into this field, and refused to come to see me?
I live in fear.
I am alone in life, hard not to die, still want to be a lone ghost?
Just when I was full of diarrhea, my mother came dressed in red.
She's so beautiful!
Like the sun shining in her mouth on the river.
Unlike the whimsical color of the previous dream, she beat me to climb up, and she laughed very gently.
laughed and she cried.
She held my hand tightly and said sorry over and over again.
Pride, like my mother, has never been soft to anyone with a low eyebrow, but at this moment, she cries:
"Mommy don't know, I really do not know that you will have such a hard time. I'm sorry, the mother is sorry for you, I shouldn't do this, I just really hope you can have a happy life!"
I look at the tears of the mother, mouth "no matter" but late to say not.
I just said: I'm sorry.
Sorry, didn't live as she wanted.
She hesitated, trying to say something.
"Autumn"
The short word is like a thunderstorm, and I am shocked that all three souls fell out of the dream.
Autumn is the time of autumn.
This name is buried by me.
Fifteen years later, it was called again.
is read by someone who should not know.
20
I burst into tears.
He knows everything.
ruined everything.
How dare he love me like this!
Even my aunt knows that to love a person is not willing to make that person sad and frustrated. How can such a well-informed person not understand?
He knows it!
is because it is too clear, so that in the banner of loving me, I can do these things called my liver!
Jingqing was held in his arms, I only felt fried by fire.
I bite my teeth to lift some strength and break away from his arms.
He watched me fall back into bed, anxiously trying to reach for my hand.
"Don't touch me!" and I tried to open his hand, but because of the exertion, I fought with blood and spit again and again.
"Ash! Come, preach a healer, proclaim a medicine soon!"
I do not care to wipe off the lip of the blood, but the more the more flowers.
Like everything between me and Jingqing.
Only death can be ended.
I stared at him.
It's funny, this scene is so familiar so awkward for me and him.
is just a change of years, now, my heart suddenly only hate.
Don't pretend to be deeply affectionate, you don't really love anyone, and even less love me, you - "I took off the cloth and exposed the cruelty between us."
Just love yourself.
"From beginning to end!"
The scenery is clear, the lips are slightly moved, but ultimately there are no words.
"You are right," my eyes are a little bit black, fight the last effort in the heart to say a clean breath, "the glory is rich, so now I deserve it, I also deserve it. But if it is born, I do not want to see you again."
"I will not love you any more!"
Then I heard only a noise, but I could not hear what they were saying.
I saw my sister.
My lips are open.
I wanted to say to her, "Sister, we were all wrong. How dare we try to infect the gods?"
"God loves the world, because he loves only the world"
"So he will never, ever, ever be partial to one"
21
I was lucky not to die that day, but I still didn't get over it.
I died in the winter of three years.
The snow suppressed the red bricks and covered up the darkness and dirt in the Forbidden City.
I remember that the snow of the year when I entered the palace was as big as it is now.
Keeping a small square curtain, walked into this four-square city, and watched these four-sided days for a lifetime.
Finally, buried in these four square places.
The face of the scenery is white, almost pleading: "Ash, don't leave me!"
"I'm not leaving, I'm just going to the palace gate to look outside."
Look, the last look.
I worked my way forward.
's winding snow trails were soon blanketed by renewed snowflakes.
I walked step by step, and the cold erosion made my eyes faint and my body fell uncontrollably.
"Ash!" the scenery quickly picked me up.
"Kingqing," I waved my lips, "I used this year's birthday wish, can I use it next year?"
His tears were hot, dropping on my red face.
"Let me see the scenery outside, I can only do this one thing in my life."
"Autumn..." he looked at me, "okay!"
He was running with me, the snow was flying, splashing in his splash, but he did not stop his pace.
But it was late at last, and when I was half a step away from the palace gate, I closed my eyes permanently.
Since then, there will be a queen in this world, but there will no longer be my autumn.
, I saw the long river sunset, heard the hu chinese flute.
My mother was standing in front of me.
Laughed and fetched me a jujube red pony.
And I set my horse and whip, and wandered freely on this vast and endless prairie.
22
The moment she closed, I knew that my sky would never light up again.
I didn't say to her again: I'm sorry.
For my arch has long since ceased to forgive me.
I have been standing in the snow for a long time, until the mother who has not been closed has also come in the wind and snow.
"Qing son," she did not pass the eye, refused to look at Arun, but issued a compassionate sigh in her mouth.
Let's stop here.
"It's time to put it down. People, always looking ahead"
"put it down..." I put these two words in my mouth a thousand times, suddenly laughing out loud.
I laughed and cried.
I asked my mother, "How do I put it down?"
mother then asked me, "do not put down, how can you? This way, you are seeking this life, the next life, life and life with her fate, and can really be with her knowledge?"
Seeing that I still did not move, the queen waved and disbanded the palace people.
She came close to look at Arun, like to play such a joke when watching a game.
Long time, she opened her lips:
"The Emperor, do not forget, the power and her, you are the first to choose the power, no matter which time it is."
"You do this like this, but you can't be greedy enough, can not protect their hearts, love, but for the emperor, six relatives, absolutely. Without her, you will not be confused in the future."
"It's good for you, it's... free for her"
I looked at the queen mother, who was covered by counting and power, and her lips were wide open, but in the end she did not speak.
I took Arun back to the bedchamber and put on the red dress I had bought for her earlier.
That's what I prepared for her 18th birthday.
She liked the red dress very much, but she could not wear the red in the bedroom as a human being. So it was with the people, even more so with the royals.
So I could only hide, even with that love.
I've watched countless times as she slinked up in her own yard to wear a red dress.
She is beautiful, so beautiful that all the colors in this world are against her.
and red is the best match for her.
But when I saw her dressed in red, I knew that I had already seen the beautiful scenery of this life.
But the scenery is not guarded.
I buried her next to her aunt.
I know that this is just a relief to me, but there is only so much I can do.
Before she was buried, I was as scared as if I was awake.
My hand is on the coffin.
This parting is really a farewell.
"Ash," my head fell, and my eyes went red, "I have been lying to you and to many people all my life. Even when I am willing to tell the truth, you do not believe me."
"But I ... Alan, I'm real ..."
"I really ..."
Really...
I did not say the word "love you" after all.
She doesn't want to hear it, and I don't deserve it.
I waved aloud, signaling the craftsmen to continue.
Everybody is busy and has their day.
And I looked at this open field, and there was a part of no sense lost, and more loneliness.
I'm not really out there, I just...
doesn't know where to go.
I have a country.
doesn't have a home anymore.
(End of chapter)