The day of their performance finally arrived. Minami had arrived early to get ready backstage. Given the size of the venue and that she was only part of an opening act, she didn't get her own room and had to change in the bathroom.
The hallways were cramped with staff and group members and Minami awkwardly squeezed past them to wait in the larger backstage area.
She had pulled her blondish brown hair in a high ponytail with a red bow, to match the ones she'd put on her costume, and successful wrapped the tule around her belt to create the look of a long half skirt on her side.
It definitely looked like a homemade costume, and while she felt a little self-conscious at how it hugged her body, she was confident that she could put on a Grade A performance.
That confidence faded quickly when Saki and Juri arrived in their casual clothes with no sight of their costumes with them.
Minami's eyes widened with horror and her face fell as she jogged up to them. "Where are your costumes?! We go on in a few minutes!"
"Actually…" Saki's mouth contorted, and her nose scrunched up, "I'm sorry, actually, I think I don't want to be an idol! I just want to have fun and do covers, so I don't want to go on. I just came to show you guys support"!
"….What….Saki you can't NOT perform. We practiced with the three of us, I edited the choreography. You can't drop out last minute! We're going on….like right now."
Saki sucked her lips in and looked down at the floor, rubbing her foot against the ground awkwardly.
"Saki and I actually talked about it earlier," Juri stepped forward in front of Saki in a protective manner, "Since Saki's not doing it, I don't want to do it either. Honestly, I won't look good next to you. You're going to bring me down too much. At least Saki would've balanced it out, but you're not the pretty and you can't sing or dance very well. I'm just honestly not interested in carrying you so I'm out too."
She flicked her blonde hair in Minami's face and shrugged her shoulders, grabbing Saki's hand before heading toward the audience seating and dragging her away.
"Wait! You guys! We can't just not perform! You can't do this! You're inconveniencing everyone!" Minami shouted after them.
"We're handing in our resignations it sounds like!" Juri shouted back without turning around as they exited the backstage area.
"Wai-" Minami was bout to chase after them when someone tapped on her shoulder, "Excuse me? Kissiks, right?"
Minami turned around, it was a tall man with a badge that said 'STAFF' on it. She gulped down hard and nodded.
"You're on." He motioned toward the stage and the intro music began.
She felt a lump form in her throat and a pit in her stomach. She wanted to throw up, she wanted to run away. She gulped hard and stepped out from behind the curtain on the pitch black stage.
She could hear the murmuring of the crowd and wondered where Saki and Juri were sitting, or if they would even stay to watch.
It was funny, she'd never had stage fright before, but now for the first time while performing, her body wouldn't stop quivering.
She wanted to run back behind the curtains and tell them that she couldn't do it, but her body wouldn't allow her to.
What about the staff that worked hard to put on this event?
What about Carrot Star who had been so kind enough to give them this opportunity to perform and whose concert would be affected by this? Or the audience who came to watch a good time?
If she didn't perform, the entire schedule for the show would be off.
Even though Carrot Star was a small group, even though it was a tiny stage with a small staff, even though she didn't even get to do a dress rehearsal, it still mattered.
It had every ounce of importance as a big venue, and as much as a popular artist's performance. She couldn't mess that up, no matter what.
The music to 'Only My Love' began and she shut her eyes tight, 'I can make…any stage work….' She opened her eyes just in time for the spotlight to hit her.
Supportive cheers echoed in her ears.
The room didn't transform like it usually did, it had no need to, this was finally the real deal.
Although the light sticks were not for her, the banners were not for her and even this stage was not hers, she was going to take full advantage of it.
She was going to eat this opportunity and satisfy the craving she'd had.
She'd only practiced her parts, but she did know the entirety of the song and thought back to the original choreography video she'd seen.
Then, she spotted Naoto and Akina in the crowd, vigorously chanting and pumping their light sticks. She felt a confidence boost and the stage fright faded away.
"And you are my only love! Only my love! Perfect immu- AND IF I had the chance~" She jumped around on stage, trying to fulfill each person's parts, cutting off her own lyrics in order to start the next line.
The supportive cheers faded into confused ones which then faded into confused murmurs.
"This is really bad…"
"Why does she seem so rushed on stage? Haha…."
"I know that she isn't the main act, but she makes me want my money back just for having to see this…."
She couldn't hear what they were saying, but she could tell they weren't enjoying it by how they stood still awkwardly and how the chants had subsided.
She looked for Naoto and Akina for additional support. Akina was still pumping her light stick, screaming as loud as she could. Naoto, however, had put his light stick down and was now covering his face awkwardly.
She felt her heart skip a beat, and not in a good way.
This song was meant for a group, not for a solo.
The track she had prepared didn't have backing vocals on it, so she couldn't just leave spots blank, and because she was busy filling in lyrics, she had no room to breathe.
Now, even her friends who should be supporting her no matter what, seemed ashamed of her. Even the crowd was beginning to boo her now.
Finally, the music came to its end.
Minami gasped for air as she held the ending pose, waiting for the lights to return to normal before she could make her exit.
Thankfully she had nailed at least the ending, thanks to Naoto's suggestions.
Unfortunately, that was not enough to save her performance, even two of the ribbons she had pinned to her dress had fallen off during the performance and some of the tule around her belt had come undone and was falling down. It was a miracle she didn't trip on any of it.
Once the lights returned to normal, she quickly picked the fabric up and stood back tall, smiling at the crowd who was now passionately booing her.
"Everyone, thank you so much for giving me energy for my performance! I hope you will enjoy Carrot Star's concert! See you next time!" She winked at the crowd and bowed with tears in her eyes.
They continued to boo and she quickly exited the stage. Her tears rolled down her cheeks and she erupted into a full on cry as soon as the curtains closed behind her.
She quickly grabbed her belongings and ran out of the venue. Juri, Saki, Naoto and Akina tried to catch up to her but she was already gone.
"What the hell was that about?" Naoto screamed at Juri and Saki. "Why were you not up there with her?!"
"We didn't WANT to and we have every right to say no, we don't want to do this." Juri crossed her arms and kept her cool.
"You do but….you just completely embarrassed someone who you call your friend up there…." Akina stated quietly. She looked she was about ready to cry.
"Then why didn't YOU go up there? Huh? You expect me to, but you wouldn't have done it either so don't even!" Juri gritted her teeth, snarled and flipped her hair.
"I would have, if I knew you had backed out. I would've practiced with her and filled in…." Akina took a breath, trying not to cry at the shock of Juri's attitude.
"But you didn't even give her the chance to back out and think if SHE didn't want to perform, or to get people to fill in for you two. Don't try to excuse your behavior and put it on her when you were fully in the wrong, Juri!" Naoto clenched his jaw and his fists.
"Shut up. I don't want to hear that from you Mr. Hiding His Face In The Corner. I saw you. You practically booed her too." Juri laughed and flipped her hair again.
Naoto took a deep breath and closed his eyes, "Flip your hair at me one more time and I'm going to cut it all off. You're just an evil witch, Juri, and that's a fact." He whipped out his phone and dialed Minami's number, running out of the venue to go look for her.
Over the following days, Minami received numerous messages from the four of them.
"At least you tried though!" and "They said, 'Even though she's not the person I came for, I want my money back.' Grow up losers!" had come in from Saki.
Naoto had sent a message that was probably meant to be encouraging like, "Who cares that they thought you sucked and said you were bad? Who cares that you almost jeopardized Carrot Star's concert? You did your best instead of giving up. That's cool."
Juri simply sent numerous messages like, "We need to talk." "Hello?" "Seriously?" "Answer me." While Akina had only sent, "I thought you did a good job. I liked your performance! I'm here for you if you need anything, let me know!" and nothing beyond that.
Minami was not in the head space to answer any of them, and never responded.