My shining star in the dark!! That was what my mother would always refer to me by. Even at her dying bed, she never forgot to call me that!
So why! Why did this figure make mention of the term in that manner? Almost as though it knew the importance those words hold in my heart!
"You are befuddled, aren't you? Confused as to how I know the significance of those words".
Its words were toying with me, taunting me and acting as though they knew everything there was to know about me!
"You need not fret Raul. I am here not to do you harm but rather to help you become the best version of yourself that you can be".
It stretched out its right hand, waiting for me to grab it. From it, I could feel the sincerity radiating off of its figure.
"Hmm!!! You still don't trust me? Not even when I hold the key to helping you out?".
It retracted its arm, leaving me still on the ground. The weeper walked ahead with slow steps.
"You see, when they make mention of an Oduduwa, what comes to your mind?!".
"!!!!". I thought as I showed that I had nothing to reply with.
"Sorry about that. You are still new at this so I guess there is not much for you to know. If I remember clearly, at this time you should be at the Materialization stage".
My expression looked confused, and that must have been obvious to it as it continued its explanation.
"The Materialization stage, or as you would remember it, the First Class Advancement Stage". Says the Weeper. "Though since you have yet to even materialize, I guess it's a sorcery crime to call you a true sorcerer. What you are is merely an awakened, no different from a regular individual". It added.
Its thorough explanation continued to pique my interest. Furthermore, it deviated my attention away from the pain I was currently experiencing.
"You see, sorcerers are a unique type of entity. They are born to rule and conquer, but like every battle, there can only be one winner. Or in this case, there can only be a specific set of sorcerers with the ability to triumph over all".
"Of those specific sets is the Oduduwa who stands at the epic of it all, rivalling even the Truest of races, Gods, Celestials, and progenitors likewise. They are simply in a world of their own".
"I am sure you must be wondering? Why is a race so noble now crumbled to dust, having just one... No. Just two successors to bear witness to its might?...".
"Tell me, are you not curious"
Again! I felt its gaze sizing up my expression.
"It's because of what you are, what you possess. Ever heard the saying, with great power comes great responsibility?".
I have! And I can say that I am bearing true to the meaning of those words.
"You see the Oduduwa lineage is just too powerful, and all that power is drawn not from the so-called force. Rather, it is drawn from an individual Oduduwa's emotions".
I did not understand! Its words were contrary to what was written in the book so how could I understand?!
"The force merely acts as the fuel for the Oduduwa lineage. But you see that emotion? Emotion is what accords the ranks of the Oduduwa. It decides their fate and what path they are to eventually walk on".
"Think of it in this way; emotions for Oduduwa lineage are classified into positive and negative emotions. The negatives consist of all things bad in accordance to the standards of you know, bad. While the positive embodies all things good such as those fluffy childish feelings".
"Now you". It said, pointing its finger at me.
"You have lived your life abiding by the rules and making sure you do not go against them. That, that's a positive type emotion. So basically, not once have you experienced a negative emotion".
"That exactly is where the problem stems from!".
"Because you have no experience with both sides of the world, you ended up getting overwhelmingly absorbed by the abrupt exposure, one that came in a way that affects you greatly".
"Oduduwas are very sensitive and can be affected by even the smallest of emotions. Now imagine you who have yet to properly experience negative emotions. What happens when the first time after your bloodline awakening, the negative emotion you are exposed to is the death of one so close and so dear to you".
"What happens then!".
It looked at me, almost as though I had heard it say that my condition was the result of its question.
"You become conflicted, thrown into a state of panic as everything becomes... So brusque in your presence!".
"You were furious and acted on your anger by killing your aunt's husband. After that, your anger subsided and that was when you realised what you had just done, how you had broken your morale and code of conduct".
"Next comes the guilt part. You start feeling guilty not only because you had gone against your code of conduct, but also because a part of you enjoys it and thinks that he very much deserves what was done to him".
"But... You can't admit that to yourself. You can't be honest to yourself or make your consciousness fully realize that what you had done, was done after proper thinking and under a rational state of mind".
"No, you just can't bring yourself to do that. After all, you are too much of a perfectionist, a mama's boy who has made it his life's calling to live the life his mother would have wanted him to".
"With such mindset, how could you admit to justifying murder and risk bringing shame to your mother and father? Making them question why they had risked their lives so that you can live on?".
I was silent the whole time. Silent not because I had nothing to say, but because every word that comes out of the weeper's mouth is a word that hits closer to home.
It understands me so well, almost as though it is piercing through my thoughts.
No. It is as though it has gone through the same thing I did, experienced what I have experienced!!