Earth Land, Ishgar, kingdom of Fiore, Magnolia.
June, x785.
After Edward's exit, an awkward atmosphere settled in the kitchen. While Elicia, Winry, and Alphonse were not sure what to do about it, Alfonzo could no longer hold back his laughter.
"Damn... Hahahaha... That was hilarious!" Alfonzo bellowed in jubilation. "And the best part about it was that I didn't do anything."
Naturally, Alfonzo's laughter and exclamation made Winry blush even harder, if that was at all possible, while Alphonse continued to shake his head before standing up and following his brother out of the kitchen. Meanwhile, Elicia could only tilt her head in confusion. Though, she felt like she missed something fun.
"Anyway..." Elicia said awkwardly. "Let's get to the tour, okay, Winry?"
"Uh... Yeah... Sure..." Winry said awkwardly as she stood up.
"Alright, we'll be back later, Fonzie." Elicia said as she linked arms with Winry and started pulling her out of the kitchen. "By the way, what are you making for lunch?"
"I'm making lasagna." Alfonzo replied as he got back to preparing the ingredients. "I'm gonna make a big ass pan just like Mama used to make."
Hearing that, Elicia's eyes lit up. Knowing that Alfonzo was talking about the lasagna his mother from his past life used to make, she could not help but be excited.
As previously mentioned, the reason Alfonzo learned how to cook was because his mother in his past life was a terrible cook. However, she made some of the best meat sauce Alfonzo had ever tasted in either life. And lasagna was his favorite of all the things she used to make with it.
In fact, Alfonzo's mother's lasagna was so popular that his friends, before they abandoned him, would get upset if they ever missed out on her making it.
Around the same time, the other girls came down to the first floor to help with the tour, leaving Alfonzo alone to make the magic happen in the kitchen. Then, after about forty minutes, the group returned to the kitchen.
"This place is awesome." Edward said with appreciation clear in his tone. "Though, I don't think I'd like that sport you call basketball."
"Well, I can understand why." Cana said in a mischievous tone. "It's kind of made for people who aren't so... vertically challenged, after all."
"Don't call me short!" Ed shot back fiercely.
"Come on, Cana." Mirajane said with a pleasant smile on her face. Though, she also had mischief swirling in her eyes. "Even if it's true, you should stop teasing him, he's a guest."
"I swear, I'm never coming back here ever again." Edward hissed out.
That lead to the rest of the group laughing uproariously.
"Come on, Brother." Alphonse said, the smile evident in his tone. "You know they don't mean any harm."
"So what?" Edward replied. "I don't like walking around with this group of giants."
That comment only caused the group laughing even harder.
Eventually, they made their way back up the stairs from the basement. And when they did, they were hit with the scent from the kitchen, causing everyone to salivate, other than Alphonse, for obvious reasons. Then, as a group, they rushed towards the kitchen.
"Fonzie, is the food ready?" Cana asked, the first to make it to the kitchen.
"Not quite." Alfonzo replied with a smile. "It'll be ready to come out of the oven in about ten minutes. Then, we'll have to let it cool for another ten."
"Do we really have to let it cool?" Marin asked as she approached Alfonzo, who was sitting at the kitchen table. Then, after sitting in his lap, she continued. "We're all wizards. There's no way it would be too hot for us to eat, right?"
"Trust me, Marin, you should let it cool like Fonzie said." Elicia said. "That little bit of extra time makes all the difference."
While she spoke, all the gazes in the room were drawn to Elicia. And when they saw the dazed look in her eyes, they decided to believe her. So, they all took seats around the table and chatted while waiting for the lasagna to be ready. Though, with the scent filling the kitchen, they were not able to fully concentrate on the conversation.
About twenty minutes later, the lasagna was ready to serve. However, instead of serving it immediately, Alfonzo separated quite a large portion from the pan. And there were two reasons for that. First, he had to make sure to leave some for Ultear, Erza, and Lucy. And second, he put some away for later. Because he knew the effect of his mother's lasagna recipe on people. And that was to overeat without minding the signals their body was sending them.
After that, Alfonzo served the food, not only did everyone get a slice of the lasagna, but they were also served a salad and slice of garlic bread. And needless to say, everyone loved it.
After their late lunch, the group broke up by gender with the ladies filing into Elicia's workstation, where they would chat while Elicia made some clothes for Winry. Meanwhile, the guys made their way to the living room to talk about what Edward and Alphonse wanted to know.
"So, what do you want to know?" Alfonzo asked as he and the Elrics took their seats on the couches in the living room.
"First of all, were you serious about firing one of the homunculus into orbit?" Edward asked skeptically.
"Yeah, it happened on the day those two douche bags from the Magic Council were supposed to be executed. "Even though I'm sure both of them are dead, one of them was turned into a homunculus by Bradley... Who turned out to be a homunculus, as well."
"You mean King Bradley?" Alphonse asked in a shocked tone. "Fiore's Knight Commander?"
"Yup." Alfonzo replied with a nod. "He's the one I shot into orbit, by the way."
"But how is that possible?" Edward asked. "There are a lot of people who have seen him age over the years."
"No idea." Alfonzo replied. Though, he was fully aware of what happened to create a homunculus like Wrath. "But when he took off that patch of his, his iris and pupil were replaced with an ouroboro's."
"Damn it!" Edward exclaimed while smashing his right fist down on his thigh. "Now it makes sense why he was so hellbent on taking in Greed."
"Oh, and speaking of Greed, they turned that traitor, Org, into a homunculus they called Greed after introducing a Philosopher's Stone into his blood stream. Though I'm pretty sure he's someone totally different from Org by now."
"They can make homunculi like that, too?" Alphonse asked in a tone filled with disbelief.
"Both Lici and I saw it happen." Alfonzo replied with a shrug. "But I'm sure you heard about it, the execution was interrupted by a demon. So, we really could not stop him."
"Yeah, we heard about that." Edward replied through gritted teeth. "If only we had come straight back to Crocus after the whole thing with Greed happened. We might have been able to do something."
"There's no point thinking about that now, Brother." Alphonse said. Then, he turned his attention back to Alfonzo. "And how did you kill the other one?"
"Oh, it wasn't me that killed that one." Alfonzo replied while shaking his head. "But based on the description, both Lici and I had fought her before."
"Her, was it the one that could elongate her fingernails and cut through almost anything?" Edward asked.
"Yeah, that's right." Alfonzo replied. "I guess the homunculus figured out that it was me and Lici who saved Hughes, who found out a pretty big secret. So, they tried to take Marin hostage to lure us out. But they underestimated her too much. And she ended up killing her in the end."
"But how?" Edward asked.
"With one of these." Alfonzo said as he pulled this tonfa off his back. "These weapons are a bit special. And when they come in contact with a Philosopher's Stone, they release the souls trapped within. Unfortunately, they don't help those souls to pass on. Instead, they end up as wandering souls."
"Seriously?" Edward asked skeptically. "They don't look like anything other than a pair of painted tonfa to me."
"Well, I have a Philosopher's Stone on hand that I could show you with." Alfonzo said with a shrug. "But I'm still studying it to see if there's a way to cancel out the homunculi's abilities."
"Seriously?" Edward exclaimed in surprise. "You have one of those, too?"
"Yeah, they used it in a trap they set for Lici." Alfonzo replied. "Honestly, I don't know why they would do that. Then, again, the fake quest they put up asked her to find an heirloom in a ruined village. And a Philosopher's Stone looks as precious as they get."
"I guess..." Edward muttered as he slumped back into the couch. "*Sigh* We've been dealing with them for years. And you guys have had almost as many run ins with homunculi as we have."
"You were even able to kill two of them, too." Alphonse added in a somewhat forlorn tone.
"Well, we have to get rid of them." Alfonzo replied. "I mean, if you knew what they were planning, you'd wanna get rid of them, too."
"And just what are they planning?" Edward said, sounding unsure if he actually wanted to know.
"Well, they've been digging a big ass [Transmutation Circle] underground that covers most of Fiore." Alfonzo replied. "On top of that, they've massacred towns and villages in certain spots, which makes it look like the [Transmutation Circle] used to make a Philosopher's Stone. Or that's what Hughes told me, at least. That's probably why they tried to get rid of him, too."
Hearing that, both Edward and Alphonse sat up straight. And while Edward's eyes were wide open in shock, Alfonzo had no doubt that Alphonse would have the same expression on his face if he had one.
"If that's true, why haven't you told anyone about it?" Edward asked angrily.
"Because if we did, it would cause panic." Alfonzo replied casually. "And that would just make it easier for the homunculi, and any other assholes who wanna cause trouble, to make a mess of things."
Hearing Alfonzo's response, Edward and Alphonse exchanged glances. Then, they both nodded in understanding. Although they were unsure of who exactly Alfonzo was talking about, they knew there were a lot of people in the world who would love to take advantage of the chaos news like that would bring to Fiore.
"Anyway, do you have any more questions?" Alfonzo asked in a relaxed tone.
"No, not for now, at least." Edward replied.
"Same here." Alphonse chipped in.
"Good." Alfonzo said with a nod. Then, his expression became more serious. "And like Sun said back at the guild hall, if you want to know my opinion on how the two of you could get your bodies back, I'd be happy to tell you. But I'd need to know the whole story. Even so, I know that's not an easy story to tel. So, just know that the offer is always open."
Once again, Edward and Alphonse exchanged glances. This time, however, their expressions were much more solemn. Then, they looked Alfonzo in his eyes before responding.
"After everything you've told us, as hard as it is to believe, we believe you when you say you have some thoughts about how we can get our bodies back." Edward said.
"But we're still not sure about telling you what happened back then." Alphonse said, picking up where his brother left off. "It's really personal, after all."
"Yeah, I feel you." Alfonzo replied with a nod. "Even so, the offer will always be open to you. Oh, and on another note. If you were thinking about going after the homunculus, you should probably give up on that."
Caught off guard by the change in subject, Edward and Alphonse looked at Alfonzo blankly. However, before too long, Edward was able to snap out of his daze.
"What do you mean?" Edward asked with a frown. "There's a chance they may know how to get our bodies back."
"I can see where you're coming from." Alfonzo said.
A moment later, just before he continued, his expression changed. Instead of the relaxed expression he wore for the majority of the conversation thus far, he was now sporting a blood thirsty smile.
"The homunculus were the ones who gave the Zeref Cult responsible for building the Tower of Heaven, the location of me and Lici's home village." Alfonzo said, his voice sounding more like a growl than before. "And because of that, both of our parents were killed while protecting us."
Hearing that, Edward opened his eyes wide in surprise. And Alfonzo how no doubt that Alphonse's expression would be similar if he could have one.
"But why would they do that?" Alphonse asked in an unsure tone. "If they were only looking to make the [Transmutation Circle] why would they even need to?"
"Because my mother was the Mage Killer, Bianca Rollen before she retired and got married." Alfonzo replied, his magic power starting to leak. "And..."
"Her magic, [Dispel Magic], would have been a hurdle for the homunculi's plans, right?" Edward asked, finishing Alfonzo's sentence.
"That's right." Alfonzo replied, "And let me give you a friendly piece of advice."
Upon reaching that point, Alfonzo paused as he tried to get his emotions in check and reel in his magic power, as he could see that Edward was paling under the pressure.
"I wouldn't try to get involved if I were you." Alfonzo continued once he was in control of his emotions again. "Because when we get started, there's a good chance we'll go way overboard. And the collateral damage will be like the Fairy Tail of old."
Naturally, Alfonzo's statement about losing control and causing large amounts of collateral damage was a lie. Because no matter how they thought about it, destroying the city of Crocus would be enough to get Fairy Tail disbanded and end up on the continent's most wanted list.
But considering the way that Edward and Alphonse nodded their heads, Alfonzo was sure that his little scare tactic was enough to keep them from trying to get involved.